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Post by alibama on Aug 5, 2014 18:51:47 GMT
I was a mostly lurker on the other board. I was very hesitate to post. I have turned over a new leaf and I just don't care anymore. I will post and if someone dislikes my post or disagrees with me that's okay. I am a big girl I can handle it.
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mallie
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,253
Jul 3, 2014 18:13:13 GMT
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Post by mallie on Aug 5, 2014 19:16:28 GMT
How do you block someone? Click the person's name and it opens their profile. click the little gear icon at the right side of the page. it brings the Block option in a drop down menu. Thanks!
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Post by pattipea on Aug 5, 2014 20:41:14 GMT
This is YOUR board. This is MY board. This is a LOCAL board. This is a MULTINATIONAL board. This is OUR board. EVERYBODY'S opinions/ideas are important and interesting to some, as is the opposing/flip side of the same circumstance/situation. We all need to understand that while we have a right to 'speak' our minds, so does everybody else - whether they agree totally, somewhat, or not at all with the original poster.
Discussion is good, and what a message board is all about. Disagreements are inevitable and can be fun, and even educational. I think as grown individuals, tho, we should try to remember that just as we are entitled to share our opinion, so is the next person. There will be times when we all pretty much agree with a post, but there will also be times of disagreement, when we all need to toughen up and pull up our 'big girl panties'. I would just hope that we could remember to show our fellow sisters/brothers on this board a certain level of respect, whatever their opinion.
We're all in this together, AND by our own choice.
And that's my opinion on this topic. Sorry,I'm just a bit testy today.
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Post by BeckyTech on Aug 6, 2014 3:05:46 GMT
Sorry,I'm just a bit testy today. Honestly I was surprised by this last bit. I thought your comments were well stated and right on the mark! I wasn't reading any kind of a testy edge into your tone at all. Which only goes to the point that tone is so difficult to convey online!
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Post by pattipea on Aug 6, 2014 4:18:07 GMT
Sorry,I'm just a bit testy today. Honestly I was surprised by this last bit. I thought your comments were well stated and right on the mark! I wasn't reading any kind of a testy edge into your tone at all. Which only goes to the point that tone is so difficult to convey online! Thanks, Becky. I'm just usually not so 'wordy' around here.
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Post by freecharlie on Aug 6, 2014 4:30:01 GMT
If a thread is getting too much for you, back out and quit participating or reading. Post them, put them up for discussion. You may find that we aren't evil even if we have opinions. Hell, peamail them to me and I'll post them
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Post by theboydbunch on Aug 6, 2014 4:32:21 GMT
This is YOUR board. This is MY board. This is a LOCAL board. This is a MULTINATIONAL board. This is OUR board. EVERYBODY'S opinions/ideas are important and interesting to some, as is the opposing/flip side of the same circumstance/situation. We all need to understand that while we have a right to 'speak' our minds, so does everybody else - whether they agree totally, somewhat, or not at all with the original poster. Discussion is good, and what a message board is all about. Disagreements are inevitable and can be fun, and even educational. I think as grown individuals, tho, we should try to remember that just as we are entitled to share our opinion, so is the next person. There will be times when we all pretty much agree with a post, but there will also be times of disagreement, when we all need to toughen up and pull up our 'big girl panties'. I would just hope that we could remember to show our fellow sisters/brothers on this board a certain level of respect, whatever their opinion. We're all in this together, AND by our own choice. And that's my opinion on this topic. Sorry,I'm just a bit testy today.
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Post by peasful1 on Aug 6, 2014 5:47:24 GMT
If a thread is getting too much for you, back out and quit participating or reading. Post them, put them up for discussion. You may find that we aren't evil even if we have opinions. Hell, peamail them to me and I'll post them Honestly, if anything short of a full-on fetal position coddle causes one to retreat, perhaps it is best they stick to fluff posts. It's good to know one's own limitations. No sense putting yourself in the line of fire if you already know you aren't up for it.
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anniebygaslight
Drama Llama
I'd love a cup of tea. #1966
Posts: 7,402
Location: Third Rock from the sun.
Jun 28, 2014 14:08:19 GMT
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Post by anniebygaslight on Aug 6, 2014 5:50:33 GMT
This is YOUR board. This is MY board. This is a LOCAL board. This is a MULTINATIONAL board. This is OUR board. EVERYBODY'S opinions/ideas are important and interesting to some, as is the opposing/flip side of the same circumstance/situation. We all need to understand that while we have a right to 'speak' our minds, so does everybody else - whether they agree totally, somewhat, or not at all with the original poster. Discussion is good, and what a message board is all about. Disagreements are inevitable and can be fun, and even educational. I think as grown individuals, tho, we should try to remember that just as we are entitled to share our opinion, so is the next person. There will be times when we all pretty much agree with a post, but there will also be times of disagreement, when we all need to toughen up and pull up our 'big girl panties'. I would just hope that we could remember to show our fellow sisters/brothers on this board a certain level of respect, whatever their opinion. We're all in this together, AND by our own choice. And that's my opinion on this topic. Sorry,I'm just a bit testy today. Bravo!!
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FurryP
Drama Llama
To pea or not to pea...
Posts: 7,220
Site Supporter
Jun 26, 2014 19:58:26 GMT
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Post by FurryP on Aug 6, 2014 6:27:27 GMT
If a thread is getting too much for you, back out and quit participating or reading. Peamail. Old habits die hard.
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Post by gar on Aug 6, 2014 8:16:29 GMT
Many times over the last month there have been things I would have liked to bring to the board for discussion...not now. As was mentioned in a previous thread I read this morning-I'll just stick to the fluff posts.
It's easy to focus on the one thread that goes south - but what about the 1001 threads that are friendly, funny, ordinary....whatever? I know words can be hurtful but you can simply stop reading if things get a bit out of hand and the words won't hurt you. The vast majority of discussions don't go wrong, just the odd one or two if you look overall.
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anniebygaslight
Drama Llama
I'd love a cup of tea. #1966
Posts: 7,402
Location: Third Rock from the sun.
Jun 28, 2014 14:08:19 GMT
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Post by anniebygaslight on Aug 6, 2014 10:06:08 GMT
It's easy to focus on the one thread that goes south - but what about the 1001 threads that are friendly, funny, ordinary....whatever? I know words can be hurtful but you can simply stop reading if things get a bit out of hand and the words won't hurt you. The vast majority of discussions don't go wrong, just the odd one or two if you look overall. Spot on, gar.
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Post by woodysbetty on Aug 6, 2014 11:19:09 GMT
I'm just a pretty snarky person in general. I'll admit that. I just don't understand what makes some people get hurt over message boards. If you are so sensitive that your real life feelings get hurt over a little snark then maybe a message board isn't for you. I don't understand why some people get their feelings hurt instead of just closing the thread and not coming back. I personally miss the put your big girl panties on attitude of days gone by. I thought the hurt feelings thread that was posted this morning was beyond ridiculous. I didn't even think anything that was posted to or about that OP qualified as snark. That!
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 7, 2024 20:28:39 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Aug 6, 2014 12:33:30 GMT
I'm wondering if the hurt feelings that seems to be going around right now is due to misconception. I know for a while, I had the feeling that the new board was "nice" (and bordering on boring). It was so nice in fact, that a lot of NSBR lurkers were coming out of the shadows (including me). Now things are getting a little more like pea land and people are getting shocked and hurt because they didn't get the high fives, prayers or whatever that was taking place at the beginning of this board. I do hope the lurkers continue to stay out of the shadows and don't let the last week or two chase you back. Just remember, this is STILL THE SAME PEOPLE from two peas and the usual snark and hand slapping is part of the fun. When I lurked on the old board I never thought the "usual snark" and "handslapping" was all that fun. Some of the pile-ons where not exactly fun to watch. I am guilty of being lulled by the "honeymoon" of the new board and I'm very, very thankful that I've not revealed anymore of myself here.
Many times over the last month there have been things I would have liked to bring to the board for discussion...not now. As was mentioned in a previous thread I read this morning-I'll just stick to the fluff posts.
This exactly.
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scrapaddie
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,090
Jul 8, 2014 20:17:31 GMT
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Post by scrapaddie on Aug 6, 2014 12:41:50 GMT
Awwwww...... The honeymoon is over!
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Post by samcro on Aug 6, 2014 12:42:15 GMT
I'm wondering if the hurt feelings that seems to be going around right now is due to misconception. I know for a while, I had the feeling that the new board was "nice" (and bordering on boring). It was so nice in fact, that a lot of NSBR lurkers were coming out of the shadows (including me). Now things are getting a little more like pea land and people are getting shocked and hurt because they didn't get the high fives, prayers or whatever that was taking place at the beginning of this board. I do hope the lurkers continue to stay out of the shadows and don't let the last week or two chase you back. Just remember, this is STILL THE SAME PEOPLE from two peas and the usual snark and hand slapping is part of the fun. When I lurked on the old board I never thought the "usual snark" and "handslapping" was all that fun. Some of the pile-ons where not exactly fun to watch. I am guilty of being lulled by the "honeymoon" of the new board and I'm very, very thankful that I've not revealed anymore of myself here.
Many times over the last month there have been things I would have liked to bring to the board for discussion...not now. As was mentioned in a previous thread I read this morning-I'll just stick to the fluff posts.
Another former lurker here who has decided the same.
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AmyS
Full Member
Enrich your life through crochet. (tm)
Posts: 178
Location: North Alabama
Jun 26, 2014 3:16:46 GMT
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Post by AmyS on Aug 6, 2014 15:53:26 GMT
Personally, I would love to have a simple rule that says no name calling (directed toward individuals or members of certain groups) and no personal attacks. Why? Because those things tend to shut down the real beneficial discussion, make people defensive, and end up with senseless fighting.
It's possible to have vigorous, interesting, and informative discussion, debate, and disagreement without name calling and personal attacks, even with a bit of snarkiness. I would venture to say that without name calling and personal attacks, we could have even more meaningful discussions on a variety of topics. It would be easier to understand someone else's point of view even if you're never going to agree with them, increasing the sense that we are a community here, although a community of many people with vastly diverging viewpoints.
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Post by gar on Aug 6, 2014 17:10:50 GMT
Personally, I would love to have a simple rule that says no name calling (directed toward individuals or members of certain groups) and no personal attacks. Why? Because those things tend to shut down the real beneficial discussion, make people defensive, and end up with senseless fighting. It's possible to have vigorous, interesting, and informative discussion, debate, and disagreement without name calling and personal attacks, even with a bit of snarkiness. I would venture to say that without name calling and personal attacks, we could have even more meaningful discussions on a variety of topics. It would be easier to understand someone else's point of view even if you're never going to agree with them, increasing the sense that we are a community here, although a community of many people with vastly diverging viewpoints. The problem is with a definition of those things. It sounds simple but you'll get inevitable disagreement on whether 'such and such' equates to name calling, whether the 'permitted snark' has morphed into something else or whether something was 'intended' as a personal attack or just came out wrong and so on. It sounds idyllic but I don't think it's workable in all honesty.
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oh yvonne
Prolific Pea
Posts: 8,062
Jun 26, 2014 0:45:23 GMT
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Post by oh yvonne on Aug 6, 2014 17:16:07 GMT
The OP Tracy is SPOT ON.
I noticed all of that myself. It's the same place, only better because now we have a mod who'll delete the jerks off our board, so no more terrorizing and targeting of Peas. I'm seeing one instigator who is ramping up the bad behavior again and I think she best settle down or be banned. Again.
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AmyS
Full Member
Enrich your life through crochet. (tm)
Posts: 178
Location: North Alabama
Jun 26, 2014 3:16:46 GMT
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Post by AmyS on Aug 6, 2014 17:29:12 GMT
The problem is with a definition of those things. It sounds simple but you'll get inevitable disagreement on whether 'such and such' equates to name calling, whether the 'permitted snark' has morphed into something else or whether something was 'intended' as a personal attack or just came out wrong and so on. It sounds idyllic but I don't think it's workable in all honesty. It's actually totally workable, from past experience. The only definitions that matter are the ones an admin establishes for a site. When instituting this as a new policy, there's a rough period to go through as everyone gets familiar with the admin's definitions and see the rules being enforced (however the admin chooses to enforce them). But once the regular site members get used to it, it's amazing how smoothly everything functions. Edit for clarity: The admin can establish definitions based on input from site members. I just meant to say that the admin has ultimate and final authority on how definitions will be interpreted.
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Post by gar on Aug 6, 2014 17:32:09 GMT
Ok, I'll defer to your experience on that I wonder how popular it'd be?
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luckyexwife
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,069
Jun 25, 2014 21:21:08 GMT
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Post by luckyexwife on Aug 6, 2014 17:34:59 GMT
And now I have a song stuck in my head...This land is your land, this land is my land, from California to the New York island...
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Post by travelscrapper on Aug 6, 2014 17:38:55 GMT
This is YOUR board. This is MY board. This is a LOCAL board. This is a MULTINATIONAL board. This is OUR board. EVERYBODY'S opinions/ideas are important and interesting to some, as is the opposing/flip side of the same circumstance/situation. We all need to understand that while we have a right to 'speak' our minds, so does everybody else - whether they agree totally, somewhat, or not at all with the original poster. Discussion is good, and what a message board is all about. Disagreements are inevitable and can be fun, and even educational. I think as grown individuals, tho, we should try to remember that just as we are entitled to share our opinion, so is the next person. There will be times when we all pretty much agree with a post, but there will also be times of disagreement, when we all need to toughen up and pull up our 'big girl panties'. I would just hope that we could remember to show our fellow sisters/brothers on this board a certain level of respect, whatever their opinion. We're all in this together, AND by our own choice. And that's my opinion on this topic. Sorry,I'm just a bit testy today.
Patti you are very spot on. I was a lurker on the other board--mainly because I didn't like the format...I find this much easier to read. Also I didn't have a lot of time to post at work, I still don't but I make time now more than before.
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AmyS
Full Member
Enrich your life through crochet. (tm)
Posts: 178
Location: North Alabama
Jun 26, 2014 3:16:46 GMT
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Post by AmyS on Aug 6, 2014 18:02:10 GMT
Ok, I'll defer to your experience on that I wonder how popular it'd be? That's the hard part! It wasn't popular among a small but very vocal (and pretty mean) group of people on my site. Some of those people left the site. I really didn't mind, because they were creating a very unpleasant, unwelcoming atmosphere for all the rest of the site members and visitors. I didn't want my site to have that kind of reputation. Once everybody got used to the new "be respectful of each other" rules, and realized that we weren't telling them they couldn't disagree on things but just that they needed to do it with consideration, and that the rules were being fairly and equitably enforced for everyone (and not selectively, based on someone's perceived popularity), they all came to love the new atmosphere. Or at least I stopped hearing from anybody that hated it. I'm not saying this *should* be done here; I'm just saying that it *could* work if the admin decided to implement some version of it. Another reason I wanted the "be respectful" policy is it greatly cut down on the amount of work I had to do behind the scenes responding to upset members. Since this site isn't a business, the admin could just set a policy that she won't respond to any reports she gets of conflicts between site members. But since my site was a business site, I felt I couldn't just ignore people who contacted me, for whatever reason. Everyone gets a response, except for the real spammers. They just get banned.
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