lesley
Drama Llama
My best friend Turriff, desperately missed.
Posts: 7,298
Location: Scotland, Scotland, Scotland
Jul 6, 2014 21:50:44 GMT
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Post by lesley on Aug 12, 2014 21:29:01 GMT
My DS16 has had a crowd of friends over tonight and they've all been hanging out in the garage, which has been partially converted into a den for him. The kids have been traipsing in and out to the bathroom all night, and I've just had to eject three of the girls who were all in there together. I pointed out that my bathroom was not in a bar, school, club or other public place, and that it was not a social venue to hang out in. Move on, people! They do this every time DS has a party, which has been weekly during the school holidays. I can't wait for school to start on Monday!
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caro
Drama Llama
Refupea 1130
Posts: 5,222
Jun 26, 2014 14:10:36 GMT
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Post by caro on Aug 12, 2014 22:04:37 GMT
I think ALL girls go to the bathroom together no matter the age. Didn't you do that? It makes me laugh to remember those days with DD.
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Post by Erica on Aug 12, 2014 22:12:12 GMT
I remember doing this too. In fact, that habit hasn't really stopped.
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lesley
Drama Llama
My best friend Turriff, desperately missed.
Posts: 7,298
Location: Scotland, Scotland, Scotland
Jul 6, 2014 21:50:44 GMT
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Post by lesley on Aug 12, 2014 22:31:10 GMT
I did go to the bathroom with friends when I was younger, but we didn't all go in the one cubicle, and we certainly didn't do it in the only bathroom in someone's house!
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Post by *Scrapper*Stamper* on Aug 12, 2014 22:32:22 GMT
Safety in numbers
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Post by Miss Ang on Aug 12, 2014 22:33:30 GMT
Oh, they are probably just gathering in there to talk about stuff (and people) that they don't want to say in front of everyone else.
I mean, unless you think there is drinking or drug use going on. (?)
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Post by mzza111 on Aug 12, 2014 22:35:00 GMT
You need to unclench.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 9, 2024 2:30:55 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Aug 12, 2014 22:36:56 GMT
Why does it bother you do much? That seems like a extreme reaction to a benign thing.
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Post by bc2ca on Aug 12, 2014 22:41:14 GMT
Highlight is mine - I think this is the reason for frustration. The girls might not realize it is the only bathroom. I wouldn't be to bothered by it, but I would tell them to move on.
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joelise
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,649
Jul 1, 2014 6:33:14 GMT
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Post by joelise on Aug 12, 2014 22:41:16 GMT
If you're happy to have them in the den I don't see a problem with the girls gathering in the toilets. Now if they go wandering around the rest of the house I might start to question them!
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Post by anxiousmom on Aug 12, 2014 22:55:13 GMT
Oh, they are probably just gathering in there to talk about stuff (and people) that they don't want to say in front of everyone else. I mean, unless you think there is drinking or drug use going on. (?) This is my question also...are you worried about some kind of inappropriate behavior? Otherwise, I would say be very really happy that your house is the one that the kids will come to, there is a lot of good in that.
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peabay
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,895
Jun 25, 2014 19:50:41 GMT
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Post by peabay on Aug 12, 2014 22:57:38 GMT
I did go to the bathroom with friends when I was younger, but we didn't all go in the one cubicle, and we certainly didn't do it in the only bathroom in someone's house! Really? I totally did. It was the one place you could go and talk about which boy you liked etc...
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Post by maryland on Aug 12, 2014 22:57:55 GMT
That sounds strange to me too. I have all girls and this never happens when they have groups of friends over. Everyone goes one at a time. Neither the boys or the girls go in groups. We would love to put a powder room in the basement. The kids have to come upstairs to use the powder room.
I can see it happening if they are at the movies or at dinner at a restaurant. My friends and I would always do it to talk about where we should go next (if double dating). But never in someone's house! Maybe the guests would go find the bathroom together because they are uncomfortable in someone's house. But they would go in one at a time and wait outside the bathroom for their friend. Of course if it's girls doing it, they may be borrowing each other's makeup. We sometimes reapplied make up during a date.
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Post by angieh1996 on Aug 12, 2014 23:10:47 GMT
My best friend and I still congregate in each other's bathrooms. Haha. I don't know why but even after 27 years of friendship we end up there smelling each other's perfumes and checking out makeup. It's become a big joke now.
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Post by myshelly on Aug 12, 2014 23:16:04 GMT
My best friend and I still congregate in each other's bathrooms. Haha. I don't know why but even after 27 years of friendship we end up there smelling each other's perfumes and checking out makeup. It's become a big joke now. We do that, too. OP, I get that you only have one bathroom. So if someone else has to go just knock on the door and say so. Otherwise who cares?
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lesley
Drama Llama
My best friend Turriff, desperately missed.
Posts: 7,298
Location: Scotland, Scotland, Scotland
Jul 6, 2014 21:50:44 GMT
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Post by lesley on Aug 12, 2014 23:20:33 GMT
Highlight is mine - I think this is the reason for frustration. The girls might not realize it is the only bathroom. I wouldn't be to bothered by it, but I would tell them to move on. You're right, it is because it's the only bathroom. The three I had ejected had been in there for fifteen minutes and were no longer using the... facilities. (And the only reason I know it was fifteen minutes is because I was about to go for a shower before watching a TV programme - I wasn't sitting outside with a timer! ) I am glad the kids all come here, most of them are nice kids. However tonight they had been drinking, and DH had to take one girl home because she could barely stand up. I don't mind the boys having a few beers, but someone had brought spirits tonight and this girl was obviously unused to alcohol. But that's a whole other thread.
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perumbula
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,439
Location: Idaho
Jun 26, 2014 18:51:17 GMT
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Post by perumbula on Aug 12, 2014 23:22:27 GMT
Do you know why girls go to the bathroom in odd numbered groups?
Because they can't even.
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Olan
Pearl Clutcher
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Posts: 4,050
Jul 13, 2014 21:23:27 GMT
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Post by Olan on Aug 12, 2014 23:29:11 GMT
Wait what? Okay scrolled up and read the OP. Your daughter is 16 right...under your roof friends of hers are drinking and you are worried about bathroom congregating? Are you in a country where the legal age of drinking is 16?
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Post by myshelly on Aug 12, 2014 23:32:44 GMT
If you click on the OP's profile you will see she is in Scotland.
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Post by myshelly on Aug 12, 2014 23:33:15 GMT
Also she said DS, which means son not daughter
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Olan
Pearl Clutcher
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Jul 13, 2014 21:23:27 GMT
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Post by Olan on Aug 12, 2014 23:40:37 GMT
Scrolled up to check the age and looked over the DS being the one who is 16. Reading comprehension. Is the drinking age in Scotland 16?
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Post by melanell on Aug 12, 2014 23:47:48 GMT
The US has a higher legal drinking age than many other countries. Plus, some other countries have 2 levels of drinking ages. You can serve alcoholic beverages to your child at one age, and then they can go buy them at an older age. I actually think that method makes a lot of sense.
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lesley
Drama Llama
My best friend Turriff, desperately missed.
Posts: 7,298
Location: Scotland, Scotland, Scotland
Jul 6, 2014 21:50:44 GMT
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Post by lesley on Aug 12, 2014 23:49:39 GMT
Wait what? Okay scrolled up and read the OP. Your daughter is 16 right...under your roof friends of hers are drinking and you are worried about bathing congregating? Are you in a country where the legal age of drinking is 16? My daughter is 19 and wasn't there tonight. My son is 16, and his friends tonight were between 16 and 18. It is not illegal in Scotland for 16-year-olds to drink alcohol at home or in other private premises. You have to be 18 to drink in pubs or clubs. Our attitude towards alcohol is quite different from that in the States. This does bring problems of its own, but generally we are quite relaxed about it. I would rather my son have a few drinks in the garage than in the park (where it would be illegal) and where I can't monitor what's going on.
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Olan
Pearl Clutcher
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Posts: 4,050
Jul 13, 2014 21:23:27 GMT
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Post by Olan on Aug 13, 2014 0:01:25 GMT
Lesley I just assumed you were in the U.S. and even if you were not I thought 18 was the legal drinking age in other countries. Didnt know some countries allowed 16 year olds to consume alcohol in private residences. I just looked up drinking ages in different countries and was surprised to see how many have 16 as their legal drinking age with restrictions.
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Post by Kelpea on Aug 13, 2014 3:42:51 GMT
Olan, in many states in the US, parents can serve their minor children alcohol in their home. I occasionally give my daughter wine to sip with dinner...we talk a lot about wineries in the area, and what types of wine there are.
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garcia5050
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,770
Location: So. Calif.
Jun 25, 2014 23:22:29 GMT
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Post by garcia5050 on Aug 13, 2014 4:38:06 GMT
Olan, in many states in the US, parents can serve their minor children alcohol in their home. How did I not know this? I'm aware of more strict drinking laws, but not lenient ones. Interesting.
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Deleted
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Oct 9, 2024 2:30:55 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Aug 13, 2014 4:39:17 GMT
I'm 32 and my friends and I still do this. the only time I've recently done it at a home is when we were drinking though.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 9, 2024 2:30:55 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Aug 13, 2014 5:09:45 GMT
Yeah, the bathroom thing wouldn't bother me. Girls congregate in the 'loo to talk about things they don't want others to be privy to. Have since the first 'privacy bush' grew out of the ground during the caveman days.
As for drinking - supervised - at 16? I've no problem with that, either. I think the US is going about the drinking age all wrong. We can send 18 year olds to war, yet they are too young to drink a beer? That's messed up.
Teaching responsible drinking at a young age - and not making it a desirable 'taboo' - seems pretty smart to me.
L
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anniebygaslight
Drama Llama
I'd love a cup of tea. #1966
Posts: 7,402
Location: Third Rock from the sun.
Jun 28, 2014 14:08:19 GMT
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Post by anniebygaslight on Aug 13, 2014 5:20:30 GMT
The legal drinking age in the UK is 18. You could be on dicey ground if the police were called. Happened to a woman I work with. She thought that she was doing the right thing by being present when the party took place, but it got noisy and the police were called. She was done for allowing minors to drink on her property. The fact that a couple of spliffs were found didn't help.
Girls always go to the loo in groups. They can talk about boys, and admire themselves in the mirror and apply a bit more Heal and Conceal while they are in there.
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Post by cupcakepeddler on Aug 13, 2014 5:28:15 GMT
That is something that my friends and I used to do all the time, for some reason the bathroom would just sometimes be the place that we would run into each other and talk and yes when we were out we would often use the same cubicle. I can understand that it would frustrate you though if it was the bathroom you wanted to use. As for the drinking thing, I am in Australia and our drinking age is 18 as well but that is not say that underage drinking does not happen. I hung out with a really good group of kids and our parents all knew that we were drinking from 16, no one really cared as long as we were well behaved and our parents knew where we were, attitudes are changing a bit these days but back then and where I lived it was not that frowned upon.
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