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Post by mcscrapper on Jan 13, 2017 19:42:42 GMT
Wedding planning is not for wimps! I'm having a lot of sticker shock at the moment! Bare minimum ceremony for 20-25 guests is at least $5000 around here and that doesn't include everything either. I would still need food, a cake, flowers and stuff. This is a second wedding for me and I don't need all the bells and whistles. We just want something simple.
Eloping in Savannah GA would cost me around $2500 and that includes 3-4 nights at a super nice B&B and the deluxe package. The only thing I would need is the dress and hair and make up.
Same for a similar ceremony in New Orleans.
Neither are too far and there would be plenty for us to do and fun food cities.
Who else just eloped or did a destination wedding? Were your kids ok with it if you just went alone? Give me the scoop!
Meredith
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Post by myboysnme on Jan 13, 2017 19:52:51 GMT
I got married in Las Vegas. I had a wedding dress and flowers and all that. Then we went to dinner and a show. Our parents and siblings were there. If I had kids I would have included them. Perhaps if you have some family go they can take the kids that night.
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Belle
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by Belle on Jan 13, 2017 19:58:51 GMT
I would elope!
Savannah or NOLA would be beautiful for a wedding!
My aunt eloped for her (and his) 2nd marriage and neither side had their adult children at the ceremony - they flew to Hawaii from Oregon.
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Post by peasapie on Jan 13, 2017 20:16:47 GMT
My friend's daughter and husband got married in Hawaii. The did it live online and all their friends "attended" from afar, going so far as to get dressed up for the occasion and drinking champagne in their homes. I thought it was a great idea.
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Post by mom on Jan 13, 2017 20:20:05 GMT
I had a destination wedding (Santa Fe) and only invited about 20 people. My DH and I paid for everything our selves, including the arrangements for our guests. In all we spent about $4K.
I absolutely would do it again (the destination) but honestly? I would just invite maybe 5 people max. Not because of the money, but because honestly as long as my boys were there and a minister, I dont care who else was there. FWIW, my boys were toddlers when I remarried so not adults.
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Post by malibou on Jan 13, 2017 20:21:03 GMT
I vote elope. It's a special time for the two of you and it should only be your feelings involved. Go with what feels like the two of you.
J
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Post by mom on Jan 13, 2017 20:21:05 GMT
I would elope! Savannah or NOLA would be beautiful for a wedding! My aunt eloped for her (and his) 2nd marriage and neither side had their adult children at the ceremony - they flew to Hawaii from Oregon. My dad did this after my mom died. He eloped and none of his 5 kids were there (all adult). We, the kids, were actually glad to not have to go. |
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Post by birukitty on Jan 13, 2017 21:18:37 GMT
DH and I eloped, well I don't really call it eloping which to me is done in secret with no one knowing. Isn't that the true definition of the word eloping? We had a destination wedding with just the two of us in attendance. It was my 3rd wedding (1st was when I was 20 because I thought living together was a sin and when exdh got into cocaine I left that marriage, 2nd exdh was abusive so I left that marriage after 7 years), This wasDH's first-but his parents had both passed and he wasn't close at all to either of his two siblings. In fact he pretty much couldn't stand them. I have a son who was 4 at the time and he was more than happy to spend a week being spoiled by his grandparents. To us it made sense. We went to a resort in Jamaica where they did everything (held the wedding, provided the flowers, cake, officiant, champagne, music and would have provided the photography-but being a wedding photographer and DH working in pro photo shop in Washington DC we did that part ourselves) for free! It was wonderful, beautiful, and perfect for us. Nothing was rushed because we were on own time schedule. Then we stayed at the resort for the rest of the week for our honeymoon. The photography was a bit weird because it felt to me like I was working on my wedding day  but in the end we were so happy we did that. I set us up in the poses and DH had rented the special equipment (auto timer devices) from the shop-this was 21 years ago. He put the camera on a timer so it'd go off every few seconds. I took his photos, he took mine. During the ceremony the camera stood on a tripod and went off on the timer. Of course everyone else (you OP) wouldn't be doing this, so no worries on your day. You'll just relax and hire your photographer. I'm not sure if the resorts in the Caribbean still offer free wedding deals like this or not, but if they do it might cover the cost of the plane ticket by the time you add everything up-know what I'm saying? Instead of going to New Orleans or Savannah and paying for wedding costs there, fly to a resort in the Caribbean that offers free weddings for the same cost. For some reason air fare costs are supposed to be much cheaper this spring. A flight I'm looking into going to Poland and flying home from Holland is coming up at $800.00 to fly there in May where it used to cost $1500.00 to fly to Holland in November. Just a thought. Of course you'd have to add in the cost of staying at the resort, but you'd also have the cost of saying at a place in Savannah or New Orleans. |
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Anita
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,702
Location: Kansas City -ish
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Post by Anita on Jan 13, 2017 21:23:23 GMT
I'm a big fan of eloping. I did it for my first wedding. If I ever got married again, I'd go that route again.
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Post by littlemama on Jan 13, 2017 21:23:55 GMT
Bare minimum ceremony for 20-25 guests is at least $5000 around here and that doesn't include everything either. I would still need food, a cake, flowers and stuff. If the $5K doesn't include food, cake, or flowers, what is in that number? (I got married 20 years ago, so I'm not up on the costs) A wedding ceremony is relatively cheap. A wedding reception is where the big money is. |
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AnotherPea
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,969
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Post by AnotherPea on Jan 13, 2017 21:52:36 GMT
I eloped. Loved it. But there wasn't anyone that would have been put out because we did it. I do think others' feelings should be considered.
How old are the kids? If they are living at home, I think they should be involved. Their family dynamics are going to change substantially. It seems like eloping when you have teens or younger says "this is my new husband, we are a unit. I've placed you guys over here in a different family box."
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mallie
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Post by mallie on Jan 13, 2017 22:18:38 GMT
Bare minimum ceremony for 20-25 guests is at least $5000 around here and that doesn't include everything either. I would still need food, a cake, flowers and stuff. If the $5K doesn't include food, cake, or flowers, what is in that number? (I got married 20 years ago, so I'm not up on the costs) A wedding ceremony is relatively cheap. A wedding reception is where the big money is. That is my question too. My dd is engaged and we found that unless you are choosing a fancy venue for the ceremony, it is quite cheap. We found a beach that is free and some state parks that are about $100. Chair rental is not that expensive. Even making an arch with fake flowers is not bad. It is the reception with food, drink and music that is the killer. |
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Dalai Mama
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Jun 26, 2014 0:31:31 GMT
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Post by Dalai Mama on Jan 13, 2017 22:48:47 GMT
I didn't elope - I was working my way through university by managing a bridal store so I had a gazillion contacts and everything fell into place for next to nothing. If I hadn't had all of those connections, I would 100% go for a destination wedding. No question.
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Post by maryland on Jan 13, 2017 22:57:40 GMT
We had a small wedding and it was great! Just parents, grandparents, brothers, sisters and a couple friends. Our parents paid for our education, so we didn't want them to pay for a wedding too. We have no regrets! We have already told our kids that we will pay for college, they are on their own for weddings. We go to the beach every summer, and our girls have already said they want to get married on the beach! |
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Deleted
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Oct 4, 2024 23:37:42 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jan 13, 2017 23:05:37 GMT
You can do a home wedding for a quarter of that.
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Post by mcscrapper on Jan 14, 2017 0:03:53 GMT
Bare minimum ceremony for 20-25 guests is at least $5000 around here and that doesn't include everything either. I would still need food, a cake, flowers and stuff. If the $5K doesn't include food, cake, or flowers, what is in that number? (I got married 20 years ago, so I'm not up on the costs) A wedding ceremony is relatively cheap. A wedding reception is where the big money is. One place we love is in a garden. The owner is a semi-friend of mine and is a flight nurse. She built this amazing garden on her property and rents it out to other nurses at 10% off. She provides all the props (like altar stuff) a carriage house for the wedding party to get dressed, flowers for the party, tablescapes and decor and seating. She does have coolers and any tableware needed (china, silverware, etc) for your catered meal. It does not include any food, drinks, cake, a photographer or officiant. My cost would be about $2400. The rest would be up to me and would be another $1500-2000. It is called Nirvana Gardens if you want to have a look. It really is an amazing location!! SaveSave |
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moodyblue
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Location: Western Illinois
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Jun 26, 2014 21:07:23 GMT
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Post by moodyblue on Jan 14, 2017 1:17:49 GMT
You can do it for a lot less than that, but if you have your heart set on a specific location, as you described, then you have to decide if that's worth the high cost.
We got married in front of the waterfall at the local Botanical Center; I think that cost us less than $100. We paid the officiant, but I don't remember how much. We had the reception at the farm where I grew up, in the house where my brother now lives and in the gardens that my mom created. We did an open house type reception, in the afternoon, with only snacks and beverages and cake. People loved how relaxed it was and they could walk around the gardens, sit on the deck or just hang in the house.
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Post by AussieMeg on Jan 14, 2017 1:31:17 GMT
If I ever got married (which I wouldn't, but let's pretend for the sake of the discussion) then I would definitely elope or do a destination wedding. I guess how the kids would feel about it would depend on how old they are. My kids are 12 and 19, and I think that they'd be disappointed if they weren't included. But if either of my parents had remarried when I was an adult in my 20's or older, I wouldn't have minded a bit not being included.
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Post by newfcathy on Jan 14, 2017 3:53:50 GMT
One of my cousin's dd had a very frugal wedding.
The reception was outside in the field near her home. They had tables under tents. The food was potluck! The couple had fond memories of regular potluck meals with their parent's friends. There was a roast pig. A couple of cousins bought lots of wine.
The bride wore a white lace tea length Gunnie Sax dress that she had purchased secondhand and had worn to a prom. It looked great. Her sister wore a new pink knee length dress. I did say that the bride was frugal.
There was square dancing in the barn.
We had a great time.
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Post by librarylady on Jan 14, 2017 3:57:54 GMT
I thought the meaning of elope was to go off in secret to get married. If you want to just have a ceremony, no guests, that is just getting married. It was discussed on this thread 2peasrefugees.boards.net/thread/49543/elopeBTW, if your destination wedding is out of the US, the couples I know found out the laws are so complicated in other places that the couple just had a civil ceremony here in US to make it legal and the ceremony in the foreign place was just for show, it was not a legal ceremony in that foreign country. For my second wedding, I had a modestly priced new dress, a small cake, some punch, one bouquet of flowers and that was it. It has been too many years ago to remember costs. We had about 25 guests. Cake was from a grocery store bakery. |
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Post by 950nancy on Jan 14, 2017 3:58:15 GMT
If I had to do it again, it would be on a beach with just my family and maybe a friend or two. The marriage is really about the relationship after the wedding, and I didn't realize that until I had been married for years. I don't love weddings, so I don't want another one.
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Deleted
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Oct 4, 2024 23:37:42 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jan 14, 2017 4:20:36 GMT
If the $5K doesn't include food, cake, or flowers, what is in that number? (I got married 20 years ago, so I'm not up on the costs) A wedding ceremony is relatively cheap. A wedding reception is where the big money is. One place we love is in a garden. The owner is a semi-friend of mine and is a flight nurse. She built this amazing garden on her property and rents it out to other nurses at 10% off. She provides all the props (like altar stuff) a carriage house for the wedding party to get dressed, flowers for the party, tablescapes and decor and seating. She does have coolers and any tableware needed (china, silverware, etc) for your catered meal. It does not include any food, drinks, cake, a photographer or officiant. My cost would be about $2400. The rest would be up to me and would be another $1500-2000. It is called Nirvana Gardens if you want to have a look. It really is an amazing location!! SaveSaveWOW! What a beautiful location. Around here, $2400 for the rental of that pretty venue alone would be a steal. That being said, I would elope in a heartbeat over the stress of planning and going through a wedding. |
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Post by corinne11 on Jan 14, 2017 4:32:54 GMT
We had a destination wedding with just the 2 of us , last year in Fiji. We have been together 24 years and cost was a huge part of the reason we chose to do it the way we did. We did tell our children beforehand (and my sister!) but otherwise it was a surprise. We actually announced it on Facebook with a picture of our rings before the ceremony. We actually planned to have a ceremony back home in our garden for about 100 guests 6 months later (when summer arrived) but due to a retaining wall problem our yard is a mess so we have postponed that idea. To be honest I don't even know if we will bother now. Those who care -close friends and family have all seen the video and photos and its seems like a lot of effort and money that we could use for other things, like a new bathroom and kitchen! Our wedding was absolutely perfect for us and I have no regrets. Good luck with whatever you decide to do. Corinne |
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Post by jeremysgirl on Jan 14, 2017 4:52:16 GMT
We decided about a week before we went to Vegas to just get married while we were there. Neither of us wanted a big wedding. We sat down and discussed it with our kids and they wanted a party but didn't care about the ceremony. So we just threw a party a few months later. We got a very simple, night-time wedding in a gazebo just the two of us. And the kids got their party when we got home. It was spontaneous and intimate for us. I have no regrets.
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but in the end we were so happy we did that. I set us up in the poses and DH had rented the special equipment (auto timer devices) from the shop-this was 21 years ago. He put the camera on a timer so it'd go off every few seconds. I took his photos, he took mine. During the ceremony the camera stood on a tripod and went off on the timer. Of course everyone else (you OP) wouldn't be doing this, so no worries on your day. You'll just relax and hire your photographer.
