Hitting a child with a belt--child abuse or not??

If he did I would have no hesitation in reporting it. IMO it is abuse. It is one thing to argue whether a hand spanking of a three year old is abuse or not. But belt spanking an eleven year old is just wrong, wrong, wrong.

This is a father of the child who is not the main custodian? if i was your daughter, I would be in court TOMORROW to resolve this.

In fact, if he WAS the main custodian, i'd do the same, so not sure why I even said that!

I agree with the PP who said "It is one thing to argue whether a hand spanking of a three year old is abuse or not . But belt spanking an eleven year old is just wrong, wrong, wrong."

this right there is also another red flag of abuse. He knows what he is doing is wrong and is intimidating that poor child. Im so thankful she has you!!

Child abuse.

I have a sickening feeling just reading the title of your thread. I hold the view that hitting a child with anything is unnecessary. So a belt! This makes me so angry.

The issue of spanking (with a hand, belt, or other instrument) aside, if child was already punished, why is he punishing an 11yr for an incident that happened a month ago?  

Abuse.

I also think it is abuse. I never hit my son who is now 26, because I believe hitting only teaches that violence is the way to win. I did time outs and it worked even back in the 1990's. 

Regardless, it depends on the state law. If he lives in Tennessee, which is where you live Sherri unfortunately spanking is legal in your state (I just Googled it) unless the spanking leaves visible marks on the child.  Horrible, isn't it? Their child services recommend that if parents must spank that they never use an object (such as a belt) but only their open hand over a child's clothing. 

The fact that he threatened the child with more violence if she told however is a red flag. Maybe that could be seen as emotional abuse, maybe not. 

He is their father, and even though he only has visitation during that time he is allowed to be their father and all it entails even though he may be the most rotten father on earth. And that includes discipline decisions. I hate to say this, but it is a fact. Please understand, I am so NOT on his side. I want to rush to where he lives and hit him with a belt and more. I'm just trying to let you know where I think you stand legally-although I'm not a lawyer. I'm a woman who got a divorce with a 4 year old son. 

The only thing I can think of for you to do is to threaten said Ahole with physical violence. Do you know anyone who is big, tough and a physical threat who can put the fear of God in this jerk? Send him over with a baseball bat and scare the daylight out of his waste of oxygen. Now he might call the cops on this person but it'd be a he said vs he said situation. Your protector (your dgd's protector could say he doesn't know this person from Adam and was never near the place. He could be ready with an alibi and say he was at said bar all evening, or something like that). Just an idea. 

Nowadays it's abuse. Rightly so. When I was a kid, sadly, it was commonplace.

Legalities aside, I consider hitting a child to be abusive, even more so doing it with a belt.

Growing up, my mother hit us with belts and brooms. We didn't think of it as "abuse," but that was then and this is now. I swore I'd never do it to my kids, and I'd be concerned if someone was going to do that to my grandchild.

I personally would consider that abuse. I would research the laws in my area and then advise my daughter as to what those laws are. I would encourage her to turn him in if it is against the laws of your state. There is no way I could be quiet and allow my child, or grandchild as it is in your case, to be beaten by her father. I doubt that just telling him to stop is enough.

    PS. Although I just thought of something-if you do my suggestion above-threaten your grandchildren's father with violence it will alert him to the fact that your granddaughter told her mother about the upcoming spanking which he specifically told her not to do-with the threat of more violence if she did tell. Maybe it's best if you do decide to go with this route to wait a bit-I'd really hate to see your granddaughter have to suffer any more of a spanking than this jerk is already threatening. If he does go through with his threat perhaps that will be the time to do something. 

Not reading the thread, only the title.  I don't need to read anything else.
It's abuse.  Hitting anything or anyone with a belt is abuse.  If I can't hit my dog, my husband or my mother with a belt because it is assault then it is assault to hit my child.

I never hit my youngest son, I hit my oldest son one time when I lost it, I apologized profusely immediately and am ashamed of it.  My parents never hit me.  I hate hitting, and with a belt, just no.  Sorry. No.

Aside from that I am a social worker and worked in child protection for more than 15 years.  Finally got out of it because I was burned out by all the assholes who think kids will go straight to prison if their parents don't beat the shit out of them.