daisydonna
Full Member
Posts: 265
Sept 5, 2015 11:45:16 GMT
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Post by daisydonna on Mar 16, 2017 4:36:18 GMT
My friends daughter is getting married! I am helping her with venue and caterer choices etc. it's been fun but wow can be a tad pricy!
Those of you with adult kids...and if you helped pay....how much was the wedding?
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Post by slicksister on Mar 16, 2017 4:48:38 GMT
My DD got married in 2007. The wedding was $4000.00. The venue was a friends yard, my sister made her dress as her gift , I did the flowers and got them all wholesale. The photographer was also a friend who did the pics for free. It was an amazing, beautiful wedding. It can be done fairly inexpensively.
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perumbula
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,439
Location: Idaho
Jun 26, 2014 18:51:17 GMT
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Post by perumbula on Mar 16, 2017 4:59:41 GMT
$3000. We made the dress for $150 and all the brides maids dresses as well. We self catered and had a free venue. The cake was a gift from a relative. the centerpieces were purposely eclectic (each table was different) and most of the items were borrowed with a few purchased from thrift stores.
Yes, it can be done cheaply, but I wouldn't do it if I didn't have to. I put a lot of work into it and when I do it for my other children I plan to spend more so we can have it catered at the very least. I will make as many wedding dresses and my girls ask me to, however.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Nov 1, 2024 7:25:04 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2017 6:15:02 GMT
My son married in 2011 and I paid for all the flowers about $2000. I paid for other stuff but I don't remember.
My daughter, she was expensive! We paid out of pocket for 2 college degrees to keep her out of debt & gifted her the college fund for her wedding. I didn't keep count of what we spent above that because I just don't want to know.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Nov 1, 2024 7:25:04 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 16, 2017 11:52:41 GMT
I just got married and we paid for everything (attendant clothing as well).
Attendant clothing $1500 My dress $1300 plus $500 in alterations and accessories Flowers $500 (we only did bouquets and boutinwres, no decorative flowers) Church fees $500ish Reception hall free with hot meal purchase Food and beer $3800 Photographer $2900 (full rights to our photos) Dj $1200 Centerpieces around $200 Head table $6 (proud of that one!) cake $200 (I made it) His parents did pay for the rehearsal dinner
I never added it up because I don't want too. Lol but this was everything we wanted and nothing that we didn't. We did not decorate the church. We had the altar dressings changed to white (it was dressed to green at the time) and that was it and the pictures were so beautiful because of the stained glass in the church.
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Post by papersilly on Mar 16, 2017 11:57:45 GMT
My husbands secretary got married last year. She spent $50,000.00. It was a wedding straight out of Pinterest, with drones, three dress changes, and everything. She and the groom are wonderful though. They saved and paid for the wedding themselves.
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janeinbama
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,204
Location: Alabama
Jan 29, 2015 16:24:49 GMT
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Post by janeinbama on Mar 16, 2017 12:10:19 GMT
Three daughters married and we paid all. The DDs did buy their bridesmaid gifts and gifts for hostess. This is one of those things we just don't talk about. All three were offered $$ but wanted traditional weddings which we were fine with. I will say that last month, you just buy and buy - budget is out the door.
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Post by mikklynn on Mar 16, 2017 12:18:11 GMT
I think our DS's wedding was about $10k, for about 120 guests. We kept it as inexpensive as we could. They had it at a resort in north central Minnesota.
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anniebeth24
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,752
Jun 26, 2014 14:12:17 GMT
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Post by anniebeth24 on Mar 16, 2017 12:22:13 GMT
Budget for DD's upcoming wedding is $15,000 including everyone's contributions.
They've chosen a venue in a mansion which will only allow for about 90 guests. It's quite formal and the ceremony will take place there, too. Plated dinner with open bar. It will be fully decorated for Christmas so we don't need to provide any decorations beyond the flower bouquets that will be carried.
They decided they'd rather do small and fancy as opposed to a larger gathering in a more casual setting.
The surprise to me was in the cost of photographers. They are getting a discount from a friend of the family who is a professional. The nearly half-off price is just over $2,000.
Received a 20% discount off of DD's dress at a small, locally-owed shop. The salesgirl had mentioned that they run different monthly specials on certain lines, mostly bridesmaids, but sometimes bridal. I asked if they planned an upcoming special on the particular dress she had picked since we had plenty of time to order. Girl called the owner to ask and he said we could have 20% off if we ordered today. Done. There's a big markup, so it doesn't hurt to negotiate.
Bridal expos are really fun and a great way to get discounts. Lots of the vendors had coupons, giveaways, and "book today" discounts.
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Post by peasapie on Mar 16, 2017 12:22:33 GMT
My daughter got married in 2012. I paid for it myself as she was estranged from her father at that time and we did up for around $30k. That covered the venue, flowers, dress, DJ.
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Post by lisae on Mar 16, 2017 12:33:44 GMT
10 years ago, oldest stepdaughter married for $5000 which included everything except invitations and programs. Her biggest splurge was the photographer which DH and I thought was too much but it was how she wanted to allocate the money. It was a church wedding and reception. My mother and I did all the flowers for the receptions - I bought a bunch of them at Sam's Club and Mother does gorgeous arrangements. I did all the invitations and programs and I don't remember what I spent but it wasn't that much. A friend catered for her and it was very reasonably priced.
6 years ago, youngest stepdaughter married and while she had a similar budget plus her Mother bought her dress she did not spend nearly that much on the wedding. A lot of it went toward the honeymoon. She did the wedding on the cheap and it showed. She wouldn't let anyone help her. Her mother spent the entire reception going around telling everyone, "Bless her heart, she did all this by herself." I wouldn't have cared that she spent the money on the honeymoon if she had just kept the wedding small.
I think some things look great DIY like favors, invitations, programs, and flowers if you are talented in that way or have a reliable friend. To me a wedding budget is like anything else, you have to figure out where your priorities are and spend on those. Most of us just can't have it all.
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miyooper2b
Full Member
Posts: 331
Location: Central Indiana
Jun 27, 2014 15:38:05 GMT
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Post by miyooper2b on Mar 16, 2017 12:40:13 GMT
About $10,000 for DD #1. I paid $4000, and my ex paid $4000 and the kids chipped in about $2000. Most of the $2K went to her dress. For DD #2, nothing. They eloped and didn't tell us until after it was done. They were in the Army and stationed in Virginia at the time. DD #2 always said she was going to elope, even when she was a kid. I more surprised about it because DD and SIL had only been dating a short time. But they love each other and he is a nice guy, treats her well and is a great dad. So I got over it quickly.
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Post by maryland on Mar 16, 2017 12:44:40 GMT
My kids are younger, but they will be paying for their own weddings. We are paying for their college and there is no way we will be able to afford a wedding after college (big out of state universities are $$ ). We have three girls (19, 17 and 13) and they love the beach, so they want a small beach wedding anyways! I think if you add up the money we pay for their dance from ages 3-18, we probably spend more than most do for fancy weddings!
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Post by mommaho on Mar 16, 2017 13:39:42 GMT
About $6,000 10 years ago for DD#1 and about $12,000 for DD #2 two years ago. We gave them a budget but went over when necessary. DD#3 wants Justice of the Peace and a party in our back yard with 400 of her closest friends. LOL We will give her the same budget, offer to just give it to them and they can plan or use it for whatever.
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freebird
Drama Llama
'cause I'm free as a bird now
Posts: 6,927
Jun 25, 2014 20:06:48 GMT
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Post by freebird on Mar 16, 2017 14:37:06 GMT
My son is getting married in June. I'm guessing the total will be around $4k-$5k. I'm paying for the photographer and invites which is about half of that. My ex paid for the church and her parents will help pay for some too. I'm not sure what's going to happen outside of what I'm taking care of because they seem very blase' about the whole thing!
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momto4kiddos
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,153
Jun 26, 2014 11:45:15 GMT
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Post by momto4kiddos on Mar 16, 2017 14:44:11 GMT
dd was dating a guy whose older brother had recently married. The two families split the cost of the wedding, apparently the total was $40,000.
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Grom Pea
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,944
Jun 27, 2014 0:21:07 GMT
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Post by Grom Pea on Mar 16, 2017 14:49:04 GMT
When I got married in 2010, I read that anything under $15k is considered a budget wedding. =-O
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ginacivey
Pearl Clutcher
refupea #2 in southeast missouri
Posts: 4,685
Jun 25, 2014 19:18:36 GMT
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Post by ginacivey on Mar 16, 2017 14:52:16 GMT
The surprise to me was in the cost of photographers. They are getting a discount from a friend of the family who is a professional. The nearly half-off price is just over $2,000. Her biggest splurge was the photographer which DH and I thought was too much but it was how she wanted to allocate the money. what surprises you about the cost of the photographer? in the end - the only thing tangible from a wedding - are the photos we built a deck out onto our pond for my oldest son to marry on - we covered the rehersal bbq (at our home) - reception hall and catering i swapped out with another photographer - so that wasn't an actual cost - just time later on down the line for me i designed and had the invitations printed - minimal cost there (compared to the traditional route) i'd say - we spent $3500 (this doesn't' cover the deck cost) my daughter plans to get married on the same deck and she wants an outdoor reception at our home i'm thinking that our cost will be about the same - it just might go towards different things gina
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Peamac
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Refupea # 418
Posts: 4,230
Jun 26, 2014 0:09:18 GMT
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Post by Peamac on Mar 16, 2017 14:55:27 GMT
DD2 got married last year and the cost was around $5,000. Groom's church for ceremony and reception, so no fee there. About 125 guests with a catered meal. My sister did cupcakes for the wedding cake, but we got a plain white round cake from the grocery store for the bride and groom to cut. That was only about $12. DD did the flowers and decorations. DH built a beautiful backdrop. Photographer was a family member of the groom who gave us a small family discount. I think we paid $1300 for 2 photographers for 6 hours and the edited photos on a disc.
DD1 is getting married in December and will have the same budget. Her tastes are more expensive so she's thinking about what to trim so she can make it work.
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Post by katmandu on Mar 16, 2017 15:07:06 GMT
My 2003 wedding was $15,000 and that was enough to have a gorgeous wedding, but barely, which required me to think hard about decisions and shop around for good deals (I think this was a good thing). I definitely think that the one item I was glad I splurged on was a photographer. I love my wedding photos and they are what I will always have to help me look back on my fond wedding memories.
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Post by giatocj on Mar 16, 2017 15:07:11 GMT
My dd was 30 when she got married, so she and her now husband paid for most of it themselves and it was beautiful but super economical. We gave her a check for a certain amount to cover the limo, flowers and down payment for the photographer. Al together I think they paid about $ 2000, including our money. I am now paying for my own, VERY small wedding (40 guests), and am in complete sticker shock as to how much things are costing. I think when we are done it will be about $ 8000, maybe closer to $ 9000. The cost of the food alone is crazy, but is kind of being offset with the price of the cake being far less than we had anticipated, so things like that are helpful. And my friend's husband is doing our pictures, so that was a HUGE savings which I will be forever thankful to them for. I just read my very first wedding related magazine and had to throw it away...it was just too much. It said the average cost of a wedding in our area was about $ 32,000 with average cost of the dress alone being $ 1800 and here I was, losing it over a mere $ 8000 or $ 9000. I felt so petty .
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Post by ntsf on Mar 16, 2017 16:48:21 GMT
my dd is getting married in new zealand.. most of which they will pay for.. we are just flying over. we are funding a reception here in our town in feb.. so expect to pay $10-12,000. cheap park and rec house facility, catered dinner, dj, security guard, no or limited decorations. already has wedding dress. keeping it super simple. the site cost $3000 for 10 hours.. right in redwood forest about 1 mile from the house (with parking!!)
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Post by lisae on Mar 16, 2017 17:48:59 GMT
The surprise to me was in the cost of photographers. They are getting a discount from a friend of the family who is a professional. The nearly half-off price is just over $2,000. Her biggest splurge was the photographer which DH and I thought was too much but it was how she wanted to allocate the money. what surprises you about the cost of the photographer? in the end - the only thing tangible from a wedding - are the photoswe built a deck out onto our pond for my oldest son to marry on - we covered the rehersal bbq (at our home) - reception hall and catering i swapped out with another photographer - so that wasn't an actual cost - just time later on down the line for me i designed and had the invitations printed - minimal cost there (compared to the traditional route) i'd say - we spent $3500 (this doesn't' cover the deck cost) my daughter plans to get married on the same deck and she wants an outdoor reception at our home i'm thinking that our cost will be about the same - it just might go towards different things gina I agree photos are important but I think often there is too much time and money on the professional photos. How many photos do you really need of you in the same dress on the same day? While I had a photographer and bought many of his prints, mostly the casual ones, 3 of my friends brought their cameras and took the best photos of the entire day. They knew me and my family far better than a photographer. For my stepdaughter, they liked that the photographer had an assistant and took photos from two angles during the ceremony. His photos were beautiful but I bought maybe $200 worth and that was plenty. I have maybe two on display in our home, same as I have of our wedding. The rest went into my scrapbook with the photos I took. Oh, I should add that the one thing my youngest stepdaughter did right was hire a friend who was just getting started as a photographer. She did beautiful photos and we had all of them on disk to use as we wished.
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Post by maryland on Mar 16, 2017 18:00:50 GMT
The surprise to me was in the cost of photographers. They are getting a discount from a friend of the family who is a professional. The nearly half-off price is just over $2,000. Her biggest splurge was the photographer which DH and I thought was too much but it was how she wanted to allocate the money. what surprises you about the cost of the photographer? in the end - the only thing tangible from a wedding - are the photos we built a deck out onto our pond for my oldest son to marry on - we covered the rehersal bbq (at our home) - reception hall and catering i swapped out with another photographer - so that wasn't an actual cost - just time later on down the line for me i designed and had the invitations printed - minimal cost there (compared to the traditional route) i'd say - we spent $3500 (this doesn't' cover the deck cost) my daughter plans to get married on the same deck and she wants an outdoor reception at our home i'm thinking that our cost will be about the same - it just might go towards different things gina I agree about pictures being the most worthwhile money spent! But I am biased because I love to take pictures! If I could afford it, I would contribute to the cost of a photographer to my kids weddings. But I would even pay to have a photographer spend that amount of time with us at the beach and get great pictures! I am the crazy woman at the beach taking pictures all day long.
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anniebeth24
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,752
Jun 26, 2014 14:12:17 GMT
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Post by anniebeth24 on Mar 16, 2017 19:43:15 GMT
The surprise to me was in the cost of photographers. They are getting a discount from a friend of the family who is a professional. The nearly half-off price is just over $2,000. Her biggest splurge was the photographer which DH and I thought was too much but it was how she wanted to allocate the money. what surprises you about the cost of the photographer? in the end - the only thing tangible from a wedding - are the photos we built a deck out onto our pond for my oldest son to marry on - we covered the rehersal bbq (at our home) - reception hall and catering i swapped out with another photographer - so that wasn't an actual cost - just time later on down the line for me i designed and had the invitations printed - minimal cost there (compared to the traditional route) i'd say - we spent $3500 (this doesn't' cover the deck cost) my daughter plans to get married on the same deck and she wants an outdoor reception at our home i'm thinking that our cost will be about the same - it just might go towards different things gina I was surprised only because this wasn't something I'd ever priced before. I've never hired an independent pro photographer except for senior pictures and we used a young person who was just starting out for those. Certainly not saying it's not worth it, it was just a higher percentage of the budget than I had originally imagined. I bet your outdoor wedding on the pond was lovely.
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Post by krcrafts on Mar 16, 2017 20:11:07 GMT
DD1 got married last summer and we spent a little over $6000 plus we paid for the lodging for their honeymoon. The only thing she really wanted to splurge on was the photographer, so we were able to save money on the other things since she's not been really into planning a wedding her whole life, unlike DD2 who is now planning her wedding for next year. She will be more expensive for sure, but we've given her a budget of $8000. Crossing my fingers we can stick close to that.
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Post by annabella on Mar 16, 2017 20:33:53 GMT
My friend got married 2 years ago, she and her husband paid of it themselves, each paid $15K and their wedding was done DIY very cheaply. Flowers from Costco, venue was super small and no fancy decor.
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ginacivey
Pearl Clutcher
refupea #2 in southeast missouri
Posts: 4,685
Jun 25, 2014 19:18:36 GMT
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Post by ginacivey on Mar 16, 2017 21:18:07 GMT
My friend got married 2 years ago, she and her husband paid of it themselves, each paid $15K and their wedding was done DIY very cheaply. Flowers from Costco, venue was super small and no fancy decor. a $30K wedding wasn't fancy? holy smokes of course it's regional but i just can not imagine! gina
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Post by maryland on Mar 16, 2017 21:31:28 GMT
My friend got married 2 years ago, she and her husband paid of it themselves, each paid $15K and their wedding was done DIY very cheaply. Flowers from Costco, venue was super small and no fancy decor. a $30K wedding wasn't fancy? holy smokes of course it's regional but i just can not imagine! gina That was the first thing that went through my mind too! My husband makes good money, but I feel poor when reading what others spend on weddings.
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pudgygroundhog
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,648
Location: The Grand Canyon
Jun 25, 2014 20:18:39 GMT
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Post by pudgygroundhog on Mar 16, 2017 21:49:50 GMT
My friend got married 2 years ago, she and her husband paid of it themselves, each paid $15K and their wedding was done DIY very cheaply. Flowers from Costco, venue was super small and no fancy decor. a $30K wedding wasn't fancy? holy smokes of course it's regional but i just can not imagine! gina There is definitely a regional component. I grew up in a small town in Nebraska where the standard is either cake and punch in the church basement or church wedding followed by a reception at the American Legion (or maybe the small country club). Whole different ball game in New York!
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