What makes your home the one your kids want to be at more?

I must admit that my DS's friends tend to congregate at my house, or to be precise, my garage. Several evenings a week, there are at least half a dozen boys and girls. The only facilities they have there are an assortment of secondhand seating, and amps for their guitars. So I'm not sure if it's just amenities that attract them. I think in my son's case, it's the fact they have privacy just to hang out and swear without having to take account of parents' delicate ears! How old is your daughter? I think older teens require less in the way of entertainment, but that's just from my own experience.

My dd is a freshman. Her friends love to be here.

I think these reasons help...

-I stay out of the way, but within earshot. I also check up on them a lot. They are in the living room with the big screen. I will walk out on the loft every 10 minutes or so. They don't know I'm there, but I can check on things, ya know?

-I have junk food. Lots of it.

-If they want to run and get a movie, I take them.

-If they want to go get pizza, I take them.

-If they want to ding dong ditch their friends, I take them. They don't know I text the mom first.

-I don't try to be their friend or the cool mom.

Basically, I feed them and say yes a lot. As long as it's not destructive or illegal I'm game. Yes, it would be easier to say no. However, if I did they would not be here where I know they are safe and supervised. I have taken 6 kids to Taco Bell at midnight in my pajamas. This time will pass soon. I enjoy my time with them and I know I will never get this time back.

I'm unsure of what makes a house the one kids play at. My old house had nothing - no trampoline, pool, or big tv, yet our house was the house where all the kids gathered. I am a stern mom and no one gets away with anything, so I ask my husband - "Why here - why do they always want to be here?" I don't mind them being here because then I know what they are doing and where my kid is. I also have rules and they are good at abiding by them. At this house we have a large screen T.V., a trampoline, and big yard for playing in. They usually play games that involve running all over the yard (pre-teens and young teens). Sometimes they watch a movie (not often) or play cards or just eat. At my old house, they played a lot of board games.

I think they must like the supervision on some level because this is where they are. I don't hover - I let them play, but check on them often, and get after them if they do things they shouldn't (like climb on the deck rail). Some of the kids that hang out here have pools and other fun things at their houses but they come here mostly. I don't even have Kool-aid, so I don't know what the attraction is.

When I was a teen, our house was the hang out as well. Of course that was pre-video movies or games, no trampoline or big tv. We played a lot of running around the yard games, parlor games, board games, and cards.

I will always remember our neighbors from when Dh and I were first married. We had no children and they had two teenagers. They were putting a fire pit in their yard and they were redoing their basement - couches, TV, gaming - so that their kids wanted to bring their friends over. They advised us to always have our house be the house that kids want to be at.

Well, fast forward 12 years and our oldest dd doesn't want friends over, she wants to go to their homes. So I did two things:

1. I talked with her about how she hurts our feelings when she never wants friends over. Here, property is exceptionally expensive. She finds our house small. We do what we can. Our house is beautiful. I nicely reminded her that we like her to play here too, and that we don't appreciate her telling her friends that our house is too small. She must be happy with what she has, and proud of it.

2. I offered to redo our playroom to whatever she'd like. My youngest is going to be 6 and could still use a playroom for a while longer, she is 9 and doesn't want a playroom anymore. So some items were moved to little dd's bedroom and now we have a den. A hide a bed (she wanted a couch). It's beautiful, but the deal is that they can eat on it, walk on it, do gymnastics on it, etc. She got a puff instead of a coffee table and an ottoman. She wanted a desk, less toys (games and puzzles only), a fish tank, and a TV. She got to pick the pillow colors (lime green, turquoise and grey).

Now she's super excited to have friends over. Hopefully we get many years out of this redo.

We were the hangout house. My dh is a big kid so we had all three gaming systems with lots of fun games. We also have a big screen with a good movie selection. I always made sure to have lots of food available.

It was rough sometimes having lots of teenage boys here every night of the weekend. I teach high school, so I would go months with no time away from teenagers. We had rules, but not unreasonable ones. The boys were all great and we loved them all.

My boys are 22 and 24 now and many of these boys still come to see us when they can.