Is this common sports paperwork?

ummm, no.

we had a parent meeting where the coach said to be sure to encourage our kids, let the coach talk to the ref, and not to 'coach' the kids because it may not be what the coach wants them to do.

something crazy must have happened last year at your school!!!

My kids played softball and there was something about the parents being good sports and not talking to the refs. I've heard some crazy stories and I can guess why they do this.

This is the "Parents Code of Conduct" for our city sports league:

 I will encourage good sportsmanship by demonstrating positive support for all players, coaches, game officials, administrators and
spectators at all times.
 I will remember that kids play to have fun and that the game is for youth, not adults.
 I will focus on fun, participation, and individual skill development rather than on winning or losing.
 I will teach my child to play by the rules and to resolve conflicts peacefully.
 I will demand that my child treat other players, coaches, officials, administrators and spectators with respect regardless of race, creed,
sex, or ability.
 I will teach my child that doing one's best is more important than winning.
 I will never ridicule or yell at my child or others for a mistake or for losing.
 I will respect the officials and their authority. I will not argue with or criticize game officials.
 I will respect the coaches for their decisions. If I have an issue, I will speak to the coach off the field when there are no players present.
 I and my guests will refrain from the use of illegal drugs and alcohol at all CDAA sports events. I am strongly encouraged to refrain from
the use of tobacco at all CDAA sports events for the health of the participants and enjoyment of the game.
 I will make every effort to get my child to practice and games on time, pick him/her up on time, and in the event that we will miss a practice
or a game we will let the coach know as soon as possible.

For school sports (soccer, cross-country, track) I have never seen anything like this. For club soccer, the coach mentioned during a parent meeting that he hoped parents wouldn't coach from the sidelines because parents might give conflicting directions to what the coach would give.

I never had to sign anything like that and my kids played a bunch of different sports. I'd sign the paperwork for my kid's benefit, but I'd resent it because it sounds so condescending.

It's usually just a handful of parents who are abusive and I don't think that signing a piece of paper is going to change their behavior. My experience with sports from pre-k through high school has been that if the kid is good enough, the parents can get away with just about anything. If the kid isn't a star, the coach will make the kid pay for the parent's bad behavior.

not standard, but should be.

Our hockey club touches on most of those points in the annual parents meeting and our coaches reiterate them at the team meeting. But we do not sign something.

I have been at hockey games and swim meets where I have seen examples of every one of those behaviors.

We have signed similar papers for Rec and select leagues, but not school teams.

Our HS booster club passes out "hints" for parents, but not anything official.

My kids swim team has a flyer with the 10 commandments of being a swim parent. I think because it was conveyed in a tongue in cheek manner, it didn't have the same air of condescension you picked up on yours.



The Ten Commandments for Swimming Parents
1. Thou shalt not impose your ambitions on thy child. Remember that swimming is your child’s activity. He will progress at his own speed. The nice thing about swimming is each person can strive to do his or her personal best. It doesn’t matter whether they come in first or last, they can all improve themselves.

2. Thou shalt be supportive no matter what. There are only two questions to ask your child “did you have fun?” and “did you try your hardest?” If meets and practices aren’t fun, your child should not be forced to participate.

3. Thou shalt not coach your child. Be helpful, but don’t compete with the coach when it comes to race strategy and technique. Your job is to support and encourage.

4. Thou shalt only have positive things to say at a swim meet. If you are going to watch a swimming meet, you should cheer and applaud, but never criticize your child or the coach.

5. Thou shalt acknowledge your child’s fears. It is totally appropriate for a child to be scared at his first swimming meet, or of her first 500 free or 200 IM. Don’t yell or belittle, just assure your child that the coach would not have put her in that event if she did not feel she were ready.

6. Thou shalt not criticize the officials. The officials are volunteers who are doing the best job they can for the athletes.

7. Honor they child’s coach. The bond between coach and swimmer is a special one that contributes to your child’s success as well as fun. Do not criticize the coach in the presence of your child; it will only serve to hurt your child’s swimming.

8. Thou shalt not jump from team to team. The water is always bluer at the other team’s pool. This is not necessarily true. Every team has its own internal problems; even teams that build champions. Children who switch from team to team are often ostracized by the teammates they leave behind. Often swimmers who do switch teams don’t do better than they did before they sought the bluer water.

9. Thou shalt have goals besides winning. Encourage your child to do her best. Giving an honest effort no matter what the outcome is much more important than winning. One Olympian said, “My goal was to set a world record. Well, I did that, but someone else did it too, just a little faster than I did. I achieved my goal and I lost. This does not make me a failure, in fact, I was very proud of that swim.”

10. Thou shalt not expect thy child to become an Olympian. There are 225,000 athletes in United States Swimming. There are only 52 spots available on the Olympic Team every four years. Your child’s odds of becoming an Olympian are about 1 in 4300. Swimming is about so much more than the Olympics. Swimming teaches self-discipline and sportsmanship; it builds self-esteem and fitness; it provides lifelong friendships and much more. Most Olympians will tell you that these intangibles far outweigh any medal they may have won. Swimming builds good people and you can be happy your child wants to participate.

Not common in my experience. Paperwork that I've signed for rec and school programs do specify not arguing with referees/aggressive behavior and language and what will happen if you do, but nothing like the first three. I also don't like the tone of the first two.

As with anything else, I'm sure that those who most need these rules are the ones will sign it and then go on doing what they always do.


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Sadly, yes.  

I wish they had these rules when our boys were playing soccer some of the parents especially the dads were awful. We are talking about 5 thru 8 year olds playing soccer and the dads would be screaming at them if they weren't the star of the game and screaming at the refs.

This is the only one that I've never heard. My son's have played every sport they could so we are well versed.