How does you DH/SO feel about the amount of money you spend?

Yup. BTDT! We had our showdown years ago. He's always been kind of spoiled, I've always been kind of thrifty and one day I had just had enough of listening to him complain about my "nickel and dining us to death" (while he goes out and buys a boat, snowmobile, ATV, fishing stuff, hunting stuff, trailers, new trucks, etc.). So I got all up in his face and told him maybe we needed to add up what all HIS stuff cost vs. what all MY stuff cost, and that shut him right up!

These days I think he feels guilty because while I'm home with DD day and night, he gets out for regular networking meetings, is on bowling and trap shooting leagues, has gone on fishing and hunting trips, etc. and I never say a word. So when I tell him he needs to pick up a few days to take care of DD so I can go work at a retreat or go to one , he never says a thing anymore except, "Have fun..." 

That is the one thing my dh doesn't bitch about (as far as money).
Now, if I spend $100 on clothes "didn't you just buy clothes?"
I just bought $80 on scrapbooks.com yesterday and I guess he'll find out when the bill comes but I am going back to my tutoring job next week so he can suck it!

He doesn't care, and I find that I have to remind myself to support him spending on his hobby too!

A tank of gas for my husband's boat costs over $300. If he says anything, I refer to the credit card bills that I pay off every month. He doesn't say much anymore. I do have a ridiculous amount of stash. Ridiculous=awesome

None of his business. It's my money. I don't complain about the amount of time and money he spends on his hobbies either.

I think the hobbies we choose to participate in ARE necessary, even if the only reason for doing them is that they are satisfying and make us happy. (Ever heard the phrase "Happy wife, happy life!" It's true!) In my personal situation, DH was so hypocritical that I couldn't take the jabs and snide comments anymore and one day I just blew my top. We both were working full time and earned a similar amount. He could drop $6K on an ATV that only one of us would use and that was okay, but then be critical of me when I would spend $20 on stamps or whatever. Really? I could spend at my current pace for the rest of my life and still never catch up to what he's already spent, so I merely (okay, very angrily!) pointed that fact out. I have a pretty long fuse, but when someone makes me *that* mad, they had better duck because something might just come flying across the room at them! Needless to say, my point was made and the comments immediately stopped. I also forced him to take over paying the bills and balancing the household checking account which I had been doing all along, and I think that helped him to see the light too. It wasn't long after that that he curbed his own spending and now we're debt free for the most part.

I could understand him getting irritated if I was the only one buying stuff (even small things) that we couldn't afford or that buried us in credit card debt, but that wasn't the case because he was also contributing to the problem, tenfold. Pot, meet kettle! I was raised to be careful with my money, so it took him seeing it in black and white to realize that it was his spending, not mine, that created the mess we were in.

I am lucky that my husband is very supportive because he likes the results. He even buys a few scrapbook items for me if he thinks I will like it. It also helps that he has a huge garbage pail kid collection.

I REFUSE to allow anyone to make me feel guilty about my hobby. What you allow is what will continue. I watched my father do that to my mother and suck the joy right out of her free time. Meanwhile, he felt no compunction about spending money we didn't have on "his" stuff. No way, no how is that happening in my house. So I nipped that in the bud pdq. 


I had a similar Come to Jesus meeting with my dh. I totaled up what he spends on his "collections" (which sit there in boxes, aren't displayed, and he has nothing to do with after he buys them). Then I compared them to my stuff, (which I use to create). He hasn't said a word since.

What money? 

Paper, my favorite & most frequently-used supply, dominates my inventory. Despite me telling him otherwise, my husband believes paper costs pennies per sheet (just look in the back-to-school section at Target where 100 sheets of notebook paper cost less than $1) & considers scrapping an inexpensive hobby. He has zero interest in & never comments about my purchases, since he assumes they're only a couple bucks each.

DH doesn't really question me on it. He would probably be pretty shocked at some of my purchase totals but I also go a couple months without finding anything I like at all so I purchase nothing. It all evens out

we don't use credit so I can only spend money I have - DH knows I'm more frugal than he is and he actually encourages me to buy more/spend more than I do. I'm lucky - he's an enabler at the craft store. I think it's a combination of actually being supportive of my hobbies/liking my creations and guilt over how MUCH money he spends on Lego, patches and models not to mention flea market 'bargains'.

DH & I each have the same amount of fun money to spend however we choose. So as long as my purchases have a place to go he doesn't have any reason to care.

  Thanks!!