lindab
Junior Member
Posts: 71 
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Post by lindab on Aug 10, 2017 22:15:28 GMT
So I'm going to advise my son and his baby's mom to have a co-parenting agreement written up to avoid misunderstandings and trouble in the future. Child is 7 months old and they've lived together, in separate bedrooms (long story!), since before she was born. They will soon each have their own apartment in the same complex.
I know you can find documents online but I really think these two need some guidance from a nuetral party. There is no hostility but there are issues to be decided about. Where would you go to get help with this? Seems like an attorney would be a lot of money and since there are no big disagreements that need a judge, just decisions to be made, maybe they don't need the expense of a custody attorney. Who knows?
They live in Utah, btw.
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Post by hop2 on Aug 10, 2017 22:18:10 GMT
A family court mediator
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Post by jeremysgirl on Aug 10, 2017 22:30:23 GMT
I'm in Michigan and all that was decided by us with a friend of the court mediator seven months prior to our divorce. There is no cost. And it's filed with the family court and is legally binding. Also child support is determined as well. If I were in this situation I would want these documents protecting me and all monies to go through the court system so I had proof. My current DH paid his ex wife several times in cash before his friend of the court mediation and he had no proof. When they went she got back pay from those times because she was unwilling to admit he had given her money. Your son needs to protect himself.
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Post by littlemama on Aug 11, 2017 0:17:35 GMT
They need to go through Friend of the Court.
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aja
Shy Member
Posts: 37
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Post by aja on Aug 11, 2017 23:57:39 GMT
I'm in Michigan and all that was decided by us with a friend of the court mediator seven months prior to our divorce. There is no cost. And it's filed with the family court and is legally binding. Also child support is determined as well. If I were in this situation I would want these documents protecting me and all monies to go through the court system so I had proof. My current DH paid his ex wife several times in cash before his friend of the court mediation and he had no proof. When they went she got back pay from those times because she was unwilling to admit he had given her money. Your son needs to protect himself. I'm in MI also but had to pay $250 for a mediator, I paid $125, ex paid $125. So I'm guessing it depends on where you are. I agree mediator is best but you can file court paperwork yourself. My DH filed and initially represented himself. |
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Post by mikklynn on Aug 13, 2017 11:44:03 GMT
I also recommend having child support go through the county. She can file the paperwork herself. They will determine how much he should pay and it will be withheld from his paycheck. It removes a potential source of conflict.
Also, until they do that, he should pay her with a check, not cash. My DS paid his ex in cash and it was a huge hassle to prove he did so, even with his ex telling them he paid every week.
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Post by christine58 on Aug 13, 2017 12:19:30 GMT
Paternity test first...then do it through a court.
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Post by mom on Aug 13, 2017 14:11:37 GMT
There is no way I would proceed without a legally binding document. Otherwise the paper is basically useless.
And beware - yes, everyone is playing nicely now but that can change when there are two households, new boy/girl friends, and when someone wants to move for a job. Just get ready.
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Post by chirpingcricket on Aug 13, 2017 14:53:59 GMT
Tennessee here: Is Father's name on the birth certificate? If not, then go to Juvenile Court and file a Petition to Establish Paternity, a Permanent Parenting Plan, and Child Support. Juvenile Court is set up to deal with people who don't have lawyers, and they utilize mediators and counselors and such. At least, that's the case in Tennessee. (I would still want a private lawyer, but having just used a lawyer to put my older sister's estate to rest, I understand how difficult it is to afford one. Dang! They are expensive!!!) It's not totally free -- there are filing fees -- but Child Support Services take on a lot of the cost.
If Father's name is on the birth certificate, then I think you file a Petition to Establish Custody, which is just a horrifying term that scares so many young parents. I wish juvie would change their terminology.
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