Gray hair is taking over

No advice because I don't color my own, but wanted to validate your pain!

~ signed someone who colored her greys 3 weeks ago and already has stripes. 44 yo too young for this shit!

I'm sorry it didn't work out for you. My hair is gray on top where it is growing in but I've been coloring it at home for years so you can't tell except when it grows in where my part is between coloring. I use L'Oreal Preference and have been very happy with it for the past few years. I've tried a few brands before that one including one from Sally but this one has covered my gray the best, has the best shine and gorgeous color. I leave it on for double the time it says in the instructions to make sure the grays get covered. I also don't use the conditioner in the box because it has silicones in it. I stay away from hair products with sulfates and silicones. Instead once I rinse out the color I use a my favorite conditioner Raw Curls Wavy Swavy Conditioner (without silicones or sulfates) and it really helps to bring the moisture I need back in to my hair. 

I was talking about hair color with my stylist when I went in recently to get my hair cut because I was looking for a hair color without silicones and she said the one I was using was fine. That it looked like it worked really well for me and the method I was using must be working because my hair felt so healthy to her. That really surprised me. I'd been planning to try another one from Sally but may not bother. The one I tried before from there was also an Anti Aging One (can't remember the name) and while it did cover my gray (I left it on longer) it came out kind of flat and lasted just 2 weeks before it started fading. 

I get how you feel. I'm 57 and no way am I going gray yet! And I'm older than you Dewryce 

I can relate. I have resistant hair and have to get it professionally coloured now.

Oh I'm sorry I think I misunderstood your problem. Have you tried leaving the dye on for double the time it says in the instructions?  I think maybe the 20 developer was too light to cover your gray. When I used the one from Sally I used a 30 developer. I'm not sure what strength the developer is in the box dyes (like L'Oreal Preference) maybe someone with more experience could tell you that or maybe it will show up on Google. 

I know some people have gray hair that is resistant to dye but I never understood how resistant it could be until I read this post. Where are you located now? Maybe make a post asking for a good stylist in the area you are now? 

Don't give up-I'm sure there is a solution to your problem. 

I'm 42 and color my gray every 4 weeks. My hair is naturally almost black, so the skunk look is super obvious. I pay to get it done though, because I wouldn't trust to get the mix right. Last month my hair grew twice as much because I was in the good sun of Hawaii, so by the time my 4 week visit came along, my stylist was in shock, lol.

Ugh, i feel y'all! i have black hair, and have to color every 3 weeks. THREE. I have to do it at home now because going to my stylist every 3 weeks is just crazy. I go to her once every few months for a cut plus to get all the hair that i miss coloring at home.

I've heard going gray is in style now, but i have a 7-year old and don't want to be mistaken for his grandmother.

For what it's worth, my mom just turned 81 and is finally growing her gray out. She's ALWAYS colored it, no idea how often though.