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Post by luvmygirls on Jun 2, 2018 1:00:21 GMT
Did your grandparents or your children’s grandparents go to graduation? I’m asking because my husbands parents, who are divorced, both called him today and said they didn’t feel like going to my daughters graduation tomorrow. They are young, 60 year old grandparents with no health issues. They both don’t work or have anything else to do. They just don’t feel like going. I was floored when I heard this. I lost both of my parents and know they would not miss my daughters graduation. Just makes me want to cry. Husband is not happy at all. He knows how I feel, but I left it to him to handle since it’s his parents.
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Post by jlynnbarth on Jun 2, 2018 1:05:33 GMT
Yes, my Mom, Stepdad, my sister and her kids flew from out of state to attend both my kid’s graduation. My dad wasn’t invited. He’s not really a part of our lives. (His choice, not ours) My dh’s Dad has medical issues so didn’t attend and his Mom passed away several years ago.
I’m sorry they aren’t attending I’d be sad if mine hadn’t come.
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Post by ntsf on Jun 2, 2018 1:08:19 GMT
we have such limited tickets (all events held inside in theaters).. that there is no way grandparents come. usually, you get two tickets.. so siblings often don't attend.
that's just the way it is.
I would just let it go. we couldn't even see our son from our seat.. the flag blocked him.
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keithurbanlovinpea
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Post by keithurbanlovinpea on Jun 2, 2018 1:11:15 GMT
Their lack of attendance doesn't minimize the accomplishment. How does your teen feel about it? If they aren't bothered, I surely wouldn't be either
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 2, 2018 1:14:04 GMT
My grandparents on my Mom's side did. However, my grandfather was a long time employee (retired principal at the time) of my school district. He was friends with my high school principal. My paternal grandfather did not.
I can see my mil deciding a weekend at her lake house is more important. I don't think we even plan on inviting DH's dad. I would be surprised if ex's stepdad came. (Ex mil passed away a couple years ago)
My kids' school graduation are usually outside where the stadium can accommodate 1,000+ people. In bad weather, it goes to the gym where the Max capacity is barely 1,000 people. It gets hot, stuffy and usually ends up being standing room only. At that point, I'd prefer just parents and siblings.
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Deleted
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Nov 1, 2024 21:34:25 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 2, 2018 1:38:44 GMT
They attended some, but not all the graduations. Doesn't bother me, but in your situation I would be bothered by the short notice as your DD believed they were going to be there.
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Post by librarylady on Jun 2, 2018 1:43:48 GMT
The grandparents in my family have all attended--all HS and university graduations.
We recently attended the graduation of GD, who was getting a masters degree.
It was uncomfortable because (as I said in another thread) DH's ex has decided we need to be at war. Of course, she was
there.....but her attitude didn't stop us.
Perhaps if your DH's parents are recently divorced, they wanted to avoid the other person.....still not a reason to stay home,
IMO.
If our son's grandparents had missed 'cause they wanted to go to a lake house, I would have been royally insulted.
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Post by 5peanutsnana on Jun 2, 2018 1:44:39 GMT
My oldest DGS graduates tomorrow. I cannot imagine what would keep me from attending. He will have all 4 of his grandparents in attendance.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Jun 2, 2018 1:46:11 GMT
My grandparents had all passed away long before I graduated, so no, mine didn’t go. DH’s grandparents were elderly and lived out of state so they didn’t go to his. I attended his HS and college graduations with his mom, dad and sister. Now all of our parents are gone so there won’t be any bio grandparents at DD’s graduation, but if her pseudo grandparents are around they will be invited and welcome to attend.
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Post by jeremysgirl on Jun 2, 2018 1:51:30 GMT
My mom and my dad are attending DD graduation tomorrow. My husband and I will be going. I sent two tickets to ex for him and his wife. We had one ticket left. DS can't go into a crowd like that so DD asked that her boyfriend get the last ticket.
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Post by hop2 on Jun 2, 2018 1:58:54 GMT
My parents were no longer with us but I know my father would not have missed it for anything.
My in laws, who are pretty hands off, and have ability issues, came to both my kids graduations.
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ellen
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Post by ellen on Jun 2, 2018 2:07:41 GMT
My daughters have just one grandparent left. My dad lives over four hours away and it was important for him to see my daughter graduate. We had her grad party a couple weeks later and we had mentioned that maybe he'd rather just go to that since it would probably be more enjoyable than the ceremony, but he wanted to see her actually graduate.
Do her grandparents live close by? It would bother me more if they lived in the area.
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likescarrots
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by likescarrots on Jun 2, 2018 2:08:17 GMT
My mom's mom came. My dad's mom did not. We only had 4 tickets anyway so one of them would have had to stay home.
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Post by littlemama on Jun 2, 2018 2:09:08 GMT
All of my grandparents were living in Florida when I graduated. I don't think it occurred to any of them to come or send a card or anything.
We got five tickets to ds' graduation. Dh' s dad passed away when DS was a freshman, my step dad 9 months later, so the tickets went to my mom, MIL ans dh' s step dad.
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Post by lisae on Jun 2, 2018 2:14:40 GMT
DH plans to attend his grandson's HS graduation next year. However, that is a year away and we are 1000 miles away so it is impossible to say if it will happen for sure. Graduations are incredibly boring. Seating at our local high school is just bleachers so I can see why people don't want to go. I can also see why you would be disappointed that they weren't making the effort. They could probably survive being bored and uncomfortable for a few hours if they wanted to do it for you and your daughter.
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kate
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Post by kate on Jun 2, 2018 2:15:46 GMT
MIL is not well enough to come to DS graduation, nor is my dad. My mom will be there to represent, although she is not 100% "able" right now, either (I can get her a handicap-friendly seat). My dad is sad not to be able to attend.
I wanted my parents here because DS school is very small, and graduation is a very personalized thing - it's not hours and hours in a giant arena with a sea of caps and gowns (as my own high school graduation was). Honestly, if it were one of those giant arena events, I don't know if I would ask my mom to come to it.
Are the grands planning to come to a graduation party or do something else to mark the occasion? I can understand that they may not want to spend the day in a stadium seat if there will be a more intimate party afterward.
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Post by luvmygirls on Jun 2, 2018 2:20:58 GMT
My daughters have just one grandparent left. My dad lives over four hours away and it was important for him to see my daughter graduate. We had her grad party a couple weeks later and we had mentioned that maybe he'd rather just go to that since it would probably be more enjoyable than the ceremony, but he wanted to see her actually graduate. Do her grandparents live close by? It would bother me more if they lived in the area. Yes grandma lives about a 1/2 hour away and grandpa lives about 10 minutes away. |
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Post by luvmygirls on Jun 2, 2018 2:24:11 GMT
The grandparents in my family have all attended--all HS and university graduations. We recently attended the graduation of GD, who was getting a masters degree. It was uncomfortable because (as I said in another thread) DH's ex has decided we need to be at war. Of course, she was there.....but her attitude didn't stop us. Perhaps if your DH's parents are recently divorced, they wanted to avoid the other person.....still not a reason to stay home, IMO. If our son's grandparents had missed 'cause they wanted to go to a lake house, I would have been royally insulted. They divorced 38 years ago and neither have remarried. |
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Post by shamrock on Jun 2, 2018 2:24:35 GMT
My parents would attend. They live locally but if they didn’t, they’d still be there. DH’s parents live out of town. They are wealthy and travel more than they are home, except to visit us. I don’t expect DH’s parents to attend. I remember they half serious, half joking, talked about skipping DH’s younger brothers college graduation. I think the only reason they didn’t was bc they had to help move his stuff out.
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Post by giatocj on Jun 2, 2018 2:25:02 GMT
I was there tonight when our oldest grandson graduated. Nothing could have kept me away.
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seaexplore
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Post by seaexplore on Jun 2, 2018 2:39:39 GMT
I have no clue if my grandparents attended my junior high, high school, or college graduation.
I'm guessing my nana most likely attended all of them since she was at everything. My grandparents MIGHT have attended my HS grad since they lived a few streets over.
Now, my parents have come to my Dd’s Preschool and kindergarten graduation. If they are still around when she graduates junior high, they will most likely come. My mil and her Bf came to dd’s Kinder grad.
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Post by 950nancy on Jun 2, 2018 2:43:08 GMT
My son got to give a speech at graduation and acknowledged his grandma being there for her 11th grandchild's graduation at 90 years old. The crowd went wild. Pretty sure she was shocked and very pleased. It was very important to her that she make it even after she suffered a pretty substantial stroke.
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Post by smalltowngirlie on Jun 2, 2018 2:53:45 GMT
DH parents, brother and SIL came to DS graduation, but he is the only grandchild on that side. My dad did not attend and I was ok with that. The gym is hot and crowded. DS was not featured in any way other than walking across the stage to get his diploma. My dad was at his grad party and that means more.
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Post by cadoodlebug on Jun 2, 2018 2:54:17 GMT
No, it was just DH and me. His dad and stepmom were older though so we didn't want to put them through that. With over 450 graduates and they all walked across the stage.
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Post by pierkiss on Jun 2, 2018 3:00:48 GMT
My grandma came to my high school graduation. She had my aunt and Uncle driver her out. She wouldn’t have missed it. I was so happy she was there! She came to everything as long as she was healthy enough to do so. My other grandparents had already passed away.
I’m sorry your husband’s parents don’t want to come. That would hurt me a lot.
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IAmUnoriginal
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Post by IAmUnoriginal on Jun 2, 2018 3:08:15 GMT
My grandparents attended mine, but I had a very small graduating class. We graduated on the football field and people sat in the stands. Plenty of room for everyone.
My DS just graduated. We were limited to 4 tickets. ExH, DH, YDS and me. No tickets available for extended family. There were very few grandparents in attendance that night for any of the students. It was primarily parents and siblings. We are having his party next weekend. His grandparents and great-grandpa will attend that.
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Post by smokeynspike on Jun 2, 2018 3:17:29 GMT
I didn't even go to my own college graduation because I find graduations to be so painfully horrid. I wouldn't expect anyone else to come to my only child's in a few years, although I will invite them and let them decide (as long as there are tickets available of course).
Melissa
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Post by bc2ca on Jun 2, 2018 3:38:45 GMT
I'm sorry you are hurt by this. Do his parents have a habit of backing out of events or avoid being around each other?
Neither my dad or my MIL attended our kids' graduation. I know my dad might attend my nephew's graduation in a few weeks because we were talking about it last night. I think he has only attended one of his other 9 grandchildren's ceremonies. Timing of the events is part of the reason and limited tickets is another. We only received 5 tickets from one school and 4 from the other, so it really does mean mostly parents and siblings attend IME.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 2, 2018 3:41:42 GMT
I drove from MO to OR for my oldest granddaughter's graduation. Alone. 4200 miles round trip. Six states.
I don't know what I'm going to do next year. Due to a number of screw-ups and one child being held back a year in Kindergarten, both of her brothers are going to graduate in the same year (2019). Wasn't supposed to happen that way. I can't be in OR and FL in the same month.
So yes, I go to my grandchildren's graduations if at all possible.
ETA: There are a number of "steps" in my grandchildren's lives, but DGD's step-grandparents, aunts, and uncles who all live in the same town as DGD were at graduation also. It's a small school with a big gym; there was no limit as to how many could attend.
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Post by peano on Jun 2, 2018 3:48:41 GMT
No grandparents will be attending DS's graduation in 3 weeks. My father has mobility issues that make travel difficult--he lives 1000 miles away, and DH's mother lives on the other side of the country and can't afford the trip. I'm sure they would attend if they lived closer to us.
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