This sucks so hard!!!! Update in Original Post

I'm sitting in Dana-Farber. DH is getting a scan, his disease has progressed to the point he's starting to having trouble breathing.  He wasn't supposed to have a scan until August. DS (15yo with Autism) says "I hope they can fix Dada's breathing problem". Ugh. I have to take him home, sit him down and tell him his "Dada" is dying. I need to be strong for both DH and DS. 

I know he'll put something on FB and I told him "not until you call your Mom".  He said "I'll be too emotional, I need you to call her". 

So basically I need to hold my shit together for everyone for the next several hours.

Cancer sucks.  I hate it so much!

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UPDATE:

Thank you for your kind words and prayers, they did bring me comfort. I love this place.

So the scan showed tumor growth, we expected that. What we didn't expect is to find out he had a "little" fluid in his lungs. So I had to wheel him over to thoracic surgery.  They removed the liquid, 3.8 liters, weighted 10lbs.  DH's breathing GREATLY improved yesterday.  Now we are waiting for test results to find out if he has disease in his lung lining that caused the fluid or it was something else. 

I told DS what was going on.  He knew.  DH didn't think he knew how serious it was, I did, I love it when I'm right   DS is the MOST positive kid on the planet.  I told him that DH is sick and not going to get better, he has cancer and he will die.  DS looked at me and said "I know Mama but taking that stuff out will help his breathing now, right?  That's good for now, that Dada can breathe easier".  God, I love that kid.  And he's right, that's good for now. 

Thank you again ladies.  I didn't have someone sitting with me IRL but had you guys.