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Post by yodutchess on Nov 20, 2018 18:34:34 GMT
When I cooked, I knew when the food would be hot and on the table. My family is never on time, and has been known to forget things.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 20, 2018 18:34:49 GMT
Yes, I feel that way too. I usually tell them to bring a salad, veggie tray, or appetizers. That way I can take care of the main meal. Even if someone brings a dessert, I almost always make one too. Another reason I like to just do the meal is that I can plan for oven and frig space and make sure everything is done when it needs to be served. I think for me, I just want to do the hosting. It's what I like to do. ![:yeahthat:](//storage.proboards.com/5645536/images/yrGoHMAelQz8f2Qt0sjb.jpg) Some of my friends are fabulous cooks and I love having them bring an interesting salad or dessert to a casual "come over, we're grilling" invitation, but I also love planning a meal from start to finish and putting it all together. The good cooks all "get" that and won't pester me to bring something to my dinner party. IME, the ones that aren't that great in the kitchen insist on stopping at the grocery store for a packaged dessert or veggie tray. I always assume it is so that I will contribute something next time we're invited to their place. I want your friends
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Post by deekaye on Nov 20, 2018 18:35:17 GMT
I'm a bit like that too. People say "what can I bring" then either don't bring what's been asked for, or bring it un-made so it has to be assembled and baked in my kitchen. Um, seriously. That's WHY i'm asking you to bring something! My ovens are already fully occupied. Oh my gosh, yes, a thousand times!!! Nothing makes me crazier than to have a relative show up with a plastic Safeway sack full of stuff for the green salad needing to be made (and peeled and pared and cut and...). Happened last year. This year, when she asks (hasn't asked yet!), I'm going to suggest a bottle of wine. I enjoy make big meals and it's a delicate dance I do to make sure that everything is done at the same time, and placed in the pretty serving dishes that match the china. I know, I know, probably a bit over-board but my family appreciates the effort.
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J u l e e
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Post by J u l e e on Nov 20, 2018 18:38:00 GMT
When I host thanksgiving here my whole family travels four hours. It's a good excuse to say that food doesn't travel well so they bring drinks. They also stay for two or three days so I do everything - breaksfasts, lunches, dinners. So they bring snacks. It works.
I don't think my food is better, it's just what I like. We're going to my sister's this year and I don't like her stuffing or mashed potatoes as well as mine, although I'm sure she likes hers better. But those two foods ARE Thanksgiving to me, so I'm just not that excited about dinner.
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valincal
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Post by valincal on Nov 20, 2018 18:45:44 GMT
Taste is in the bud of the beholder. Love that! 😄
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Post by gmcwife1 on Nov 20, 2018 20:17:26 GMT
I don't mind what others bring. I usually make the main course and sides that I like and ask that they bring appetizers or another side so it always seems to work. What I don't like is when someone brings something and then needs to prep it when they get here. I don't have the room for that when I have several things going and it's hard to give up oven space at the last minute. I figure food is love to a lot of people. I have eaten food that I knew I made better, but they still want to be included or contribute. One of my friends makes some pretty bad spaghetti, but we eat it every year or so because she likes to make it. Now my sister will rave about it, I don't go that far
I do wish people (my other sister) would not expect to use my mom's stove and would have her dishes all complete when she comes over. Heck I'm over an hour away and I manage to have mine completed and not get in moms way.
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inkedup
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Post by inkedup on Nov 20, 2018 20:22:36 GMT
I'm having several gatherings/parties thru next Sunday. People ask what they can bring. I genuinely do not want people to bring food. Don't want to sound like a snob but often it's not as good as mine. I take a lot of time preparing the menu. Was a home ec. teacher and cooking/serving is "my thing". Is there anyone else out there that does not want people to bring food? Yes. I'm exactly like that at my own house. With a very few exceptions from foodie friends, mine is better. Sorry not sorry. If we're having Thanksgiving at someone else's house, though, I will enthusiastically eat whatever they're cooking and offer to bring something as well. Snobbery stops when I leave my own house. But I thought this post was going to be about cooking waaaaaay too much for the size of your group. Because I also do that. I'm one of those "just bring yourselves!" hosts, largely because I am a pretty good cook and my family and friends are often not punctual. I hate not having everything out because Aunt Joan was late like she is every year. No matter how many people we have over, though, I prepare enough food for our gathering and 13 others. My mom always said it was better to have too much food than not enough, and most of our guests love Thanksgiving leftovers. But still. It's like I don't know how to cook for fewer than 489 people in November.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Nov 20, 2018 20:29:32 GMT
We kind of feel the same way but not only because ours will be better (it will, LOL) but also because if we’re inviting you we want it to be our treat. But now if you would like to help clean up or with the dishes? I’d be ALL OVER that! Have at it, you can contribute in that way instead with my blessing!
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scrappyesq
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Post by scrappyesq on Nov 20, 2018 20:34:24 GMT
I agree with this so much. And it's not that I don't appreciate others wanting to contribute but my husband and I both love to cook and hosting is our jam. I struggle to come up with suggestions that are helpful and not insulting - I swear it's not that I don't like your pie/cake/cookies but we've got it covered so please bring an appetizer or rolls or drinks or something like that. I told my sister once she could bring appetizers. She shows up 2 hours late with them and I had other guests who were waiting to get started. I ended up cooking her appetizers and burning the bottom of some of my other dishes because I tried to get food on the table at a decent time (it was 6 and my other guests arrived on time at 3:30). Then she had the nerve to complain that DH talked too much and it took too long with the traffic to get to my house. I told that broad she never had to worry about being invited to my house again.
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Post by cakediva on Nov 20, 2018 20:38:02 GMT
Tell them to bring wine or a pie. Let me tell you about pie! Do you know that you can actually make a pie without sugar and using unripe berries. And a box of wine Ok hey now - my very favourite wine just started coming in a box (and not a cheap box lol) - so it isn't all bad!!
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Post by cadoodlebug on Nov 20, 2018 20:41:22 GMT
When people ask us what they can bring I usually say wine!
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SabrinaP
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Post by SabrinaP on Nov 20, 2018 21:14:45 GMT
Me! It seems like no one cooks anymore. Sorry, you can call me a good snob but I don’t want any store bought sides, desserts, or bread on my fancy table. Don’t get me wrong we eat those things in my house, but not for special occasions where I’m going all out. I love to cook, so I totally don’t mind doing all the cooking.
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Post by Tamhugh on Nov 20, 2018 21:40:22 GMT
Nope, I make the main dish and my family's favorite side dishes. I ask everyone else to bring a side dish that their family will like. My brother is a pescaterian and his son is a super picky eater. I have cousins with severe food allergies and one of them is also just picky. DS's girlfriend is gluten and dairy sensitive. No matter how much I think I plan well, there is always someone who does not have something they can eat. Asking them to bring something they can eat insures that that they will not go hungry. Now, getting them to actually do it is another story altogether.
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Post by kckckc on Nov 20, 2018 21:43:36 GMT
No — I would be happy if others brought everything. I am a decent cook, but I don’t enjoy it at all. I am not a picky eater and am glad to eat anything anyone brings.
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Post by tuva42 on Nov 20, 2018 21:46:23 GMT
I know your food probably is "better" but that doesn't mean your guests will like it more. I think my food is better than some of what my extended family makes, but that doesn't mean they like it better. My roasted green beans are soooo much better than their nasty green bean casserole, but half the family won't eat my fabulous roasted fresh green beans. They don't like my oyster dressing, they'd rather have Stove Top stuffing. So when you insist on only serving your food you may find that folks don't like your recipes as much as their velveeta mac and cheese.
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Sarah*H
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Post by Sarah*H on Nov 20, 2018 22:04:48 GMT
Mashed potatoes are my SIL's favorite foods. One year I suggested she bring the mashed potatoes. That year both she and my nephew got sick in the morning so were unable to come and my BIL showed up with a bag of potatoes! ![(rofl)](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/rofl.png) I'm not sure she even knew that he didn't make the potatoes (he does know how to cook and does it well!) and it is one of my favorite Thanksgiving memories.
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Post by scrappert on Nov 20, 2018 22:17:33 GMT
I am that way, but only because when I invite you over, I expect you to relax and enjoy your time there. I also try not to let anyone do the dishes either. Come over, rest, enjoy and go home.
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kate
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Post by kate on Nov 20, 2018 22:37:10 GMT
I may even find a new favorite, like the sweet potato casserole that I added after that one wonderful Tday dinner that a friend cooked when I wasn’t able! Hey, now, you know the rules around here! We need this recipe. ![:D](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/grin.png) I don't mind people bringing things, as long as they check in first. Only once did I have a guest show up with a bag of unwashed, uncut produce when they said they'd bring a salad (I could have cried - salad is one of my Most Hated Things to make). I'm not a fancy cook, though. As a guest, when I'm told in no uncertain terms to "just bring yourself," I show up with wine, sparkling water (DH drinks GALLONS of sparkling water, so I always worry that the hosts won't have enough!), or a box of nice chocolates (which they can set out with dessert if they like, or keep to enjoy after the guests have left).
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zztop11
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Post by zztop11 on Nov 20, 2018 22:39:12 GMT
Thanks for agreeing. I feel better 😀
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Post by bosoxbeth on Nov 20, 2018 23:22:25 GMT
I remember when I had a toddler and an infant, I asked my MIL to bring a salad for whatever gathering we were having. She showed up with a bag of groceries with salad ingredients, nothing washed, chopped or prepped in any way. Guess who ended up being in charge of making that salad? OY!
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Post by mollycoddle on Nov 20, 2018 23:26:21 GMT
Oh hell no. I hate to cook. Hate it. I don’t mind people making sides.
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Post by MichyM on Nov 20, 2018 23:32:45 GMT
I tend to prefer my cooking over others' especially when it comes to special dinners so I get where you're coming from. However with Thanksgiving, I think a LOT of people have favorite recipes that they want to share, and I gladly indulge. To me, Thanksgiving is all about sharing. Plus....sometimes I gain a lovely new recipe in the deal too!
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Post by Basket1lady on Nov 21, 2018 0:45:22 GMT
I may even find a new favorite, like the sweet potato casserole that I added after that one wonderful Tday dinner that a friend cooked when I wasn’t able! Hey, now, you know the rules around here! We need this recipe. ![:D](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/grin.png) I don't mind people bringing things, as long as they check in first. Only once did I have a guest show up with a bag of unwashed, uncut produce when they said they'd bring a salad (I could have cried - salad is one of my Most Hated Things to make). I'm not a fancy cook, though. As a guest, when I'm told in no uncertain terms to "just bring yourself," I show up with wine, sparkling water (DH drinks GALLONS of sparkling water, so I always worry that the hosts won't have enough!), or a box of nice chocolates (which they can set out with dessert if they like, or keep to enjoy after the guests have left). It's pretty similar to others out there. But it's hands down a family favorite now. I made it for Christmas dinner at Grandma's one year and now everyone on that side of the family makes it too. Sweet Potato Casserole 3 cups sweet potatoes, mashed 1/2 cup sugar 1/4 cup butter, softened 1/4 cup milk 2 eggs 1 teaspoon vanilla Topping: 1/3 cup butter, cold 1 cup brown sugar, lightly packed 1/2 cup flour 1 cup pecans, chopped Mix up the sweet potato mixture and put into an oven-safe buttered 9" x 13" casserole dish. In a separate bowl, use a pastry blender or fingers to crumble the butter into the sugar and flour until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Add pecans, mix, and sprinkle over the top of the sweet potato mixture. Bake at 350 degrees for 1 to 1 1/2 hours, until crumb mixture browns. I usually make this up a day ahead of time--just don't add the crumble until ready to bake or the nuts get soggy. I make up the streusel mixture ahead of time, but I put it in a separate ziplock bag. I bake the sweet potatoes, let them cool, then slip them out of their skins. No peeling necessary! Or you boil them, or use canned sweet potatoes. It's not fussy. You can make this in a crock pot and it turns out well. From cold, I'd cook it about 6 hours in the crock pot. When you bake it in the oven, it takes about an hour if the sweet potato mixture is hot, or about 90 minutes if it's cold from the refrigerator. If I'm short of oven space, I've been known to heat up the potato puree in the microwave before putting it in the casserole dish and adding the topping.
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camcas
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Post by camcas on Nov 21, 2018 0:45:40 GMT
Yes...I always ask for drinks of any kind...can always easily use or send home leftover drinks
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Post by tmarschall on Nov 21, 2018 1:14:57 GMT
I remember the year my mother in law insisted she would bring pumpkin pie. Well, I looooove pumpkin pie. During the holidays I could eat it morning, noon and night. When I was pregnant, I craved it madly. She shows up with some janky “mock” pumpkin pie that she made with CARROTS. Not a speck of pumpkin in the entire pie. I could have cried. But I did learn my lesson. No one fucks with the pie. Yes, this. I am the Pie Lady, and No One Fucks with the Pie! I also would prefer people bring pop, ice, booze or other stuff that doesn't clash with my menu. I am a very good cook and enjoy hosting, so please don't tell me you are going to buy pumpkin pie from Costco for our Thanksgiving. Well, you can go ahead and eat your costco pie (which for the record I'm sure is tasty) but I'm still making pumpkin pie! Because pies are my thing and I have ribbons to prove it, arrrgh! Sorry, I know that sounds obnoxious but this just happened and I'm just a little pissy.
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Post by twistedscissors on Nov 21, 2018 2:16:47 GMT
If I’m cooking I’m doing it all! I like my family recipes. I don’t want something you brought when you have pet hair or dandrufff covering your clothes and your hands look like they haven’t been washed in a month. No thx!
I want everything ready at the same time and hot. Not cold green beans out of a can that you cooked three hours ago.
My aunt insisted on bringing baked beans one thanksgiving, as as soon as each person tasted them they looked at me with this awful face and said these aren’t your beans! 😂😂😂
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Post by twistedscissors on Nov 21, 2018 2:18:27 GMT
Hey, now, you know the rules around here! We need this recipe. ![:D](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/grin.png) I don't mind people bringing things, as long as they check in first. Only once did I have a guest show up with a bag of unwashed, uncut produce when they said they'd bring a salad (I could have cried - salad is one of my Most Hated Things to make). I'm not a fancy cook, though. As a guest, when I'm told in no uncertain terms to "just bring yourself," I show up with wine, sparkling water (DH drinks GALLONS of sparkling water, so I always worry that the hosts won't have enough!), or a box of nice chocolates (which they can set out with dessert if they like, or keep to enjoy after the guests have left). It's pretty similar to others out there. But it's hands down a family favorite now. I made it for Christmas dinner at Grandma's one year and now everyone on that side of the family makes it too. Sweet Potato Casserole 3 cups sweet potatoes, mashed 1/2 cup sugar 1/4 cup butter, softened 1/4 cup milk 2 eggs 1 teaspoon vanilla Topping: 1/3 cup butter, cold 1 cup brown sugar, lightly packed 1/2 cup flour 1 cup pecans, chopped Mix up the sweet potato mixture and put into an oven-safe buttered 9" x 13" casserole dish. In a separate bowl, use a pastry blender or fingers to crumble the butter into the sugar and flour until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Add pecans, mix, and sprinkle over the top of the sweet potato mixture. Bake at 350 degrees for 1 to 1 1/2 hours, until crumb mixture browns. I usually make this up a day ahead of time--just don't add the crumble until ready to bake or the nuts get soggy. I make up the streusel mixture ahead of time, but I put it in a separate ziplock bag. I bake the sweet potatoes, let them cool, then slip them out of their skins. No peeling necessary! Or you boil them, or use canned sweet potatoes. It's not fussy. You can make this in a crock pot and it turns out well. From cold, I'd cook it about 6 hours in the crock pot. When you bake it in the oven, it takes about an hour if the sweet potato mixture is hot, or about 90 minutes if it's cold from the refrigerator. If I'm short of oven space, I've been known to heat up the potato puree in the microwave before putting it in the casserole dish and adding the topping. My recipe is similar. Substitute bourbon for the milk, leave out the eggs and add 1/2 cup oats to the topping.
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NoWomanNoCry
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Post by NoWomanNoCry on Nov 21, 2018 2:32:55 GMT
Cooking isn’t my thing and it stresses me out..add on our small kitchen so I would have zero issues with you all bringing food to my house lol
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Post by Merge on Nov 21, 2018 2:39:01 GMT
I know your food probably is "better" but that doesn't mean your guests will like it more. I think my food is better than some of what my extended family makes, but that doesn't mean they like it better. My roasted green beans are soooo much better than their nasty green bean casserole, but half the family won't eat my fabulous roasted fresh green beans. They don't like my oyster dressing, they'd rather have Stove Top stuffing. So when you insist on only serving your food you may find that folks don't like your recipes as much as their velveeta mac and cheese. That’s fine. Next year when they host Thanksgiving, they can make all the nasty green bean casserole they want and I’ll happily eat it.
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Post by Basket1lady on Nov 21, 2018 4:21:06 GMT
It's pretty similar to others out there. But it's hands down a family favorite now. I made it for Christmas dinner at Grandma's one year and now everyone on that side of the family makes it too. Sweet Potato Casserole 3 cups sweet potatoes, mashed 1/2 cup sugar 1/4 cup butter, softened 1/4 cup milk 2 eggs 1 teaspoon vanilla Topping: 1/3 cup butter, cold 1 cup brown sugar, lightly packed 1/2 cup flour 1 cup pecans, chopped Mix up the sweet potato mixture and put into an oven-safe buttered 9" x 13" casserole dish. In a separate bowl, use a pastry blender or fingers to crumble the butter into the sugar and flour until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Add pecans, mix, and sprinkle over the top of the sweet potato mixture. Bake at 350 degrees for 1 to 1 1/2 hours, until crumb mixture browns. I usually make this up a day ahead of time--just don't add the crumble until ready to bake or the nuts get soggy. I make up the streusel mixture ahead of time, but I put it in a separate ziplock bag. I bake the sweet potatoes, let them cool, then slip them out of their skins. No peeling necessary! Or you boil them, or use canned sweet potatoes. It's not fussy. You can make this in a crock pot and it turns out well. From cold, I'd cook it about 6 hours in the crock pot. When you bake it in the oven, it takes about an hour if the sweet potato mixture is hot, or about 90 minutes if it's cold from the refrigerator. If I'm short of oven space, I've been known to heat up the potato puree in the microwave before putting it in the casserole dish and adding the topping. My recipe is similar. Substitute bourbon for the milk, leave out the eggs and add 1/2 cup oats to the topping. That sounds good! I wonder if we have any bourbon? Off to check!
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