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Post by SockMonkey on Jun 22, 2019 14:42:32 GMT
www.nytimes.com/2019/06/19/fashion/weddings/honeymoon-hashtag-hell.htmlIf you ask JP Smith what he remembers most about his 2014 honeymoon in Aruba, he’ll say the sunsets, but not because of their beauty.“It was like a photo shoot for some magazine that would never exist,” said Mr. Smith, 38, a real estate agent in New York, and he didn’t mean that in a good way. He described the weeklong vacation with his new wife, Natasha Huang Smith, as a “sunset nightmare,” “stressful,” “cumbersome” and “torturous.”Ms. Huang Smith, 34, who works in digital marketing, was attempting to showcase their honeymoon on Instagram. “I had to prove to the world that I was having a great time,” she said. And so half of her day was spent shooting, editing, or planning Instagram posts.Shit's wild.
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Post by ferblover on Jun 22, 2019 15:12:32 GMT
When my husband and I were on vacation in May in Punta Cana, he watched a couple on the beach for awhile and then asked what was wrong with that couple. I had to watch and then explain to him what an Instagram boyfriend/fiancé/husband was and he just shook his head. That female must have jumped 50 times in the air while the male tried to capture "just the right picture" she wanted in the ocean.
Shit's wild for sure!!
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likescarrots
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by likescarrots on Jun 22, 2019 15:20:46 GMT
we saw so much of this in hawaii last month, it's crazy. imagine spending so much money on a vacation and not actually experiencing it.. also a lot of women super dressed up (often in white!) for a muddy 3 mile hike...   ETA: apparently I have more to say about this. 1. I never post on social media that I'm away from my house, I feel like it's the quickest way to get robbed, and my social media accounts are pretty locked down so most people that can see it are friends/family.... people that do this are practically begging to get robbed. 2. I don't feel all that bad for this guy, like there's no way he didn't know that his wife was like this before they got married, or if he really didn't, they probably got married WAY too quickly, and it probably had something to do with her wanting a social media wedding... |
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julie5
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by julie5 on Jun 22, 2019 15:31:26 GMT
we saw so much of this in hawaii last month, it's crazy. imagine spending so much money on a vacation and not actually experiencing it.. also a lot of women super dressed up (often in white!) for a muddy 3 mile hike... ETA: apparently I have more to say about this. 1. I never post on social media that I'm away from my house, I feel like it's the quickest way to get robbed, and my social media accounts are pretty locked down so most people that can see it are friends/family.... people that do this are practically begging to get robbed. 2. I don't feel all that bad for this guy, like there's no way he didn't know that his wife was like this before they got married, or if he really didn't, they probably got married WAY too quickly, and it probably had something to do with her wanting a social media wedding... Yeah women have been extra for a long time and social media is just a new platform. Men who marry women like this knew what they were getting into long before the honeymoon. |
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Deleted
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Nov 2, 2024 7:26:05 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 22, 2019 15:52:59 GMT
This guy complains about his wife succumbing to social media pressures, but then goes and shares that complaint with the NYT to be published on social media?
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Post by SockMonkey on Jun 22, 2019 16:01:19 GMT
This guy complains about his wife succumbing to social media pressures, but then goes and shares that complaint with the NYT to be published on social media? To be fair, the NYT isn't really "social media." It's a news article published online, but that's not the same thing as social media. Yes, I get that the story will probably appear on NYT social media, but this isn't an Instagram article. It's journalistic commentary. Also, they did interview his wife, who seems to fully admit that she was behaving this way. (I wonder if her behavior has changed since then, and what will happen if they have kids!) Although she noticed her husband was unhappy, she didn’t let his mood get between her and a good sunset shot. “He’ll say now, ‘You dragged me to that beach, you made me stand in the freezing cold water as the sun was going down!’ I think he’s scarred. It’s sad because it was our honeymoon and he remembers me dragging him to all these places.”
Social media made his honeymoon “not enjoyable,” Mr. Smith said. “They didn’t really have GPS there so I’m flying around, she’s screaming at me because she’s going to miss the perfect sunset,” he recalled. “So it became less about relaxing and more about taking all the glam shots that all the other Instagrammers are getting. We were never just hanging out on the beach.”
They almost separated after that trip, he said. “Not because of the honeymoon alone, but it was pretty bad.” |
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Post by elaine on Jun 22, 2019 16:37:12 GMT
I’m old. I admit it. It would never cross my mind to stop what I was doing on vacation to take a digital picture to post on social media. Dh posts somewhat on Facebook about what we are doing as a family, but it is one post per outing, tops. I occasionally text a photo or two to friends, but don’t have a drive to put it out there in the greater public.
For the most part, I hate getting older, but having escaped a social media addiction that was formed in middle-school is one of the positives of being over 50.
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moodyblue
Drama Llama
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Location: Western Illinois
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Jun 26, 2014 21:07:23 GMT
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Post by moodyblue on Jun 22, 2019 16:42:16 GMT
I’m old. I admit it. It would never cross my mind to stop what I was doing on vacation to take a digital picture to post on social media. Dh posts somewhat on Facebook about what we are doing as a family, but it is one post per outing, tops. I occasionally text a photo or two to friends, but don’t have a drive to put it out there in the greater public. For the most part, I hate getting older, but having escaped a social media addiction that was formed in middle-school is one of the positives of being over 50. Nor do I have the urge or need to post every time I go out to eat, as some people do. |
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Deleted
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Nov 2, 2024 7:26:05 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 22, 2019 16:46:30 GMT
This guy complains about his wife succumbing to social media pressures, but then goes and shares that complaint with the NYT to be published on social media? To be fair, the NYT isn't really "social media." It's a news article published online, but that's not the same thing as social media. Yes, I get that the story will probably appear on NYT social media, but this isn't an Instagram article. It's journalistic commentary. Also, they did interview his wife, who seems to fully admit that she was behaving this way. (I wonder if her behavior has changed since then, and what will happen if they have kids!) Although she noticed her husband was unhappy, she didn’t let his mood get between her and a good sunset shot. “He’ll say now, ‘You dragged me to that beach, you made me stand in the freezing cold water as the sun was going down!’ I think he’s scarred. It’s sad because it was our honeymoon and he remembers me dragging him to all these places.”
Social media made his honeymoon “not enjoyable,” Mr. Smith said. “They didn’t really have GPS there so I’m flying around, she’s screaming at me because she’s going to miss the perfect sunset,” he recalled. “So it became less about relaxing and more about taking all the glam shots that all the other Instagrammers are getting. We were never just hanging out on the beach.”
They almost separated after that trip, he said. “Not because of the honeymoon alone, but it was pretty bad.”It just seems to me like they both enjoy attention. If I truly had a problem with my spouse’s Instagram postings, then I wouldn’t draw more attention to it by offering up her photos and username for an article. |
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peabay
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,917
Jun 25, 2014 19:50:41 GMT
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Post by peabay on Jun 22, 2019 17:07:05 GMT
Jeez, these insecure people. Changing your plans because your friends think your honeymoon isn't good enough. That constant need for validation from others must be exhausting.
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Post by Legacy Girl on Jun 22, 2019 17:19:49 GMT
My honeymoon would have evoked spectacular Instagram jealousy. DH and I both ended up with an intestinal virus -- me, at the beginning of the four-day trip; him, on day three. It's the stuff that dreams, er, nightmares are made of.  |
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Deleted
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Nov 2, 2024 7:26:05 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 22, 2019 17:21:48 GMT
Jeez, these insecure people. Changing your plans because your friends think your honeymoon isn't good enough. That constant need for validation from others must be exhausting. I never understood the need for validation. Probably another reason I don’t have a lot of friends. |
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Post by auntkelly on Jun 22, 2019 18:09:31 GMT
This guy complains about his wife succumbing to social media pressures, but then goes and shares that complaint with the NYT to be published on social media? I felt like both of those couples overshared in the article. The guy who honeymooned in Aruba said that they almost separated after the honeymoon and not just because of the pictures. I couldn't help but think that sounded like a public passive aggressive jab at his wife. The lady who felt pressured to honeymoon in Florence shared that she and her husband didn't have sex for three days during their honeymoon because there was no air-conditioning. I don't consider myself a prude and I don't think I'm overly private, but I'd be pretty annoyed if my spouse made comments about our sex life or marital problems in the NYT. |
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ModChick
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True North Strong and Free
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Post by ModChick on Jun 22, 2019 18:18:51 GMT
😳 I don’t think I even have a picture from my honeymoon, though I do have some great memories 🥰. Not saying I don’t take pictures on vacation now and post a few later when we are home but the whole perfect pic for Instagram craz is mind boggling to me.
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Post by SockMonkey on Jun 22, 2019 18:24:05 GMT
This guy complains about his wife succumbing to social media pressures, but then goes and shares that complaint with the NYT to be published on social media? I felt like both of those couples overshared in the article. The guy who honeymooned in Aruba said that they almost separated after the honeymoon and not just because of the pictures. I couldn't help but think that sounded like a public passive aggressive jab at his wife. The lady who felt pressured to honeymoon in Florence shared that she and her husband didn't have sex for three days during their honeymoon because there was no air-conditioning. I don't consider myself a prude and I don't think I'm overly private, but I'd be pretty annoyed if my spouse made comments about our sex life or marital problems in the NYT. I feel like these folks are so used to oversharing it's not even on their radar! |
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Post by 950nancy on Jun 22, 2019 18:32:39 GMT
When my husband and I were on vacation in May in Punta Cana, he watched a couple on the beach for awhile and then asked what was wrong with that couple. I had to watch and then explain to him what an Instagram boyfriend/fiancé/husband was and he just shook his head. That female must have jumped 50 times in the air while the male tried to capture "just the right picture" she wanted in the ocean. Shit's wild for sure!! We usually vacation on beaches in the Caribbean and I can't think of a vacation I haven't seen this and other photo shoots happen. I am that person who will stop and watch for fun. To be fair, when we take my son's gf with us, I take a ton more pictures of them on the beach doing stuff like this. Young girls love a good beach pic! |
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likescarrots
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by likescarrots on Jun 22, 2019 20:57:04 GMT
This guy complains about his wife succumbing to social media pressures, but then goes and shares that complaint with the NYT to be published on social media? To be fair, the NYT isn't really "social media." It's a news article published online, but that's not the same thing as social media. Yes, I get that the story will probably appear on NYT social media, but this isn't an Instagram article. It's journalistic commentary. Also, they did interview his wife, who seems to fully admit that she was behaving this way. ( I wonder if her behavior has changed since then, and what will happen if they have kids!) Although she noticed her husband was unhappy, she didn’t let his mood get between her and a good sunset shot. “He’ll say now, ‘You dragged me to that beach, you made me stand in the freezing cold water as the sun was going down!’ I think he’s scarred. It’s sad because it was our honeymoon and he remembers me dragging him to all these places.”
Social media made his honeymoon “not enjoyable,” Mr. Smith said. “They didn’t really have GPS there so I’m flying around, she’s screaming at me because she’s going to miss the perfect sunset,” he recalled. “So it became less about relaxing and more about taking all the glam shots that all the other Instagrammers are getting. We were never just hanging out on the beach.”
They almost separated after that trip, he said. “Not because of the honeymoon alone, but it was pretty bad.”I checked out her instagram and they must have honeymooned quite a while ago because they now have a kid and based on her feed, no, she has not gotten any less obsessed with herself/instagram. |
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Post by beaglemom on Jun 22, 2019 21:38:14 GMT
I thought it was interesting. We took the kids to Disney World for the first time in April. It was a pretty long trip. I have my Instagram locked down pretty well that anyone I am friends with there I am friends with in real life and would already know we were there. But after the first couple of days, I stopped posting. I was concerned that it was going to be seen as too much? I need to go through all the pictures I took and figure out what to do with them. I usually post everything to instagram because I use chatbooks to print out books for everything - because I just don't have the bandwidth to scrap stuff at the moment!
I think that we have all become a little obsessed!
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Jun 23, 2019 0:13:58 GMT
I no longer do paper scrapbooks. I don't even make a photobook for most things. Instagram has become my scrapbook. So I may put a little effort into getting a photo that embraces the feel of that trip or vacation. I don't think I allow that to become more important than actually experiencing the event, but... to those of you looking from the outside when we're trying for that one special photo it may appear that we're obsessed with the photo.
I, too, have seen the truly perfect-moment-Instagram-obsessed in action. But I also try to respect that not everyone is and sometimes any one of us may just be trying to capture that memory in time.
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Post by myshelly on Jun 23, 2019 1:00:23 GMT
I am a “I will have a perfect picture of every event” type person.
My kids know they will wear the outfit I pick out and as soon as they have taken the perfect photo they can go play. They’re really good at it now.
My social media game is strong and I love the compliments I always get on my photos.
It’s the souvenir that I want of the vacation. There’s no difference in people doing this for social media now the way some people did for their scrapbook 15 yrs ago.
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Post by mollycoddle on Jun 23, 2019 16:35:30 GMT
I’m old. I admit it. It would never cross my mind to stop what I was doing on vacation to take a digital picture to post on social media. Dh posts somewhat on Facebook about what we are doing as a family, but it is one post per outing, tops. I occasionally text a photo or two to friends, but don’t have a drive to put it out there in the greater public. For the most part, I hate getting older, but having escaped a social media addiction that was formed in middle-school is one of the positives of being over 50. This. I know that I am old because I am frequently shocked at the over sharing that I see on social media. Some of it seems like cries for attention, which is sad. |
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rickmer
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,141
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Post by rickmer on Jun 23, 2019 17:41:10 GMT
i noticed it in paris last month. people hopping up and down in weird outfits in front of the eiffel tower, etc.
DD asked me to take dozens of the same pic of her so that she would be sure some would be "instagram worthy". i tried to be a good sport. she does selfies with me, so fair is fair! once we took a bunch, phone went away and back to the experience.
people in this article are nuts. stop worrying so much about other people coveting your supposed life. just work on having an *actual* awesome life.
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Post by dillydally on Jun 23, 2019 17:47:59 GMT
I’m old. I admit it. It would never cross my mind to stop what I was doing on vacation to take a digital picture to post on social media. Dh posts somewhat on Facebook about what we are doing as a family, but it is one post per outing, tops. I occasionally text a photo or two to friends, but don’t have a drive to put it out there in the greater public. For the most part, I hate getting older, but having escaped a social media addiction that was formed in middle-school is one of the positives of being over 50. Amen! |
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Post by birukitty on Jun 23, 2019 18:24:26 GMT
I am a “I will have a perfect picture of every event” type person. My kids know they will wear the outfit I pick out and as soon as they have taken the perfect photo they can go play. They’re really good at it now. My social media game is strong and I love the compliments I always get on my photos. It’s the souvenir that I want of the vacation. There’s no difference in people doing this for social media now the way some people did for their scrapbook 15 yrs ago. I think there is a difference between paper scrapbooking and doing this for social media. I still paper scrapbook. People like the ones in this article are taking these type of photos to post on social media to impress others. The photos I take when I'm on vacation most of the time don't have myself or who ever is traveling with me in them. I like capturing where I am and the people there-I usually travel internationally. Of course there are a few with me and my family in them. The bottom line is when I make a scrapbook the scrapbooks stays in my home and are viewed by myself and my family. They aren't posted online. I take the photos for my pleasure-not to impress the public. They aren't seen by the public. I think that is a huge difference. The people posted in the article take their photos simply to impress people online. That is their number 1 purpose. Number 2 might be as a souvenir but that's much further down the list. |
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inkedup
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Posts: 4,837
Jun 26, 2014 5:00:26 GMT
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Post by inkedup on Jun 23, 2019 18:34:53 GMT
Of course I checked out both of these ladies' Instagram accounts after reading the article, and I have to say that I don't think either of them has learned a damn thing from their honeymoon debacles. In fact, I think they used this article as a way to get more exposure for their accounts.
Both of their feeds are generically beautiful. Beautiful, moneyed people in beautiful places, doing expensive, beautiful things. The poses in front of doors and windows and bodies of water. The oversaturated colors and the all white kitchens. The selfies that are supposed to be spontaneous but that you know are the result of 3,992 different takes and filters.
They might look like they're living their best lives, but who knows? Seems like the both spend an awful lot of time "curating" their feeds and I would imagine that cuts into their actual lives a bit.
It's beautiful and boring and fake as hell.
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Post by myshelly on Jun 23, 2019 18:36:43 GMT
I am a “I will have a perfect picture of every event” type person. My kids know they will wear the outfit I pick out and as soon as they have taken the perfect photo they can go play. They’re really good at it now. My social media game is strong and I love the compliments I always get on my photos. It’s the souvenir that I want of the vacation. There’s no difference in people doing this for social media now the way some people did for their scrapbook 15 yrs ago. I think there is a difference between paper scrapbooking and doing this for social media. I still paper scrapbook. People like the ones in this article are taking these type of photos to post on social media to impress others. The photos I take when I'm on vacation most of the time don't have myself or who ever is traveling with me in them. I like capturing where I am and the people there-I usually travel internationally. Of course there are a few with me and my family in them. The bottom line is when I make a scrapbook the scrapbooks stays in my home and are viewed by myself and my family. They aren't posted online. I take the photos for my pleasure-not to impress the public. They aren't seen by the public. I think that is a huge difference. The people posted in the article take their photos simply to impress people online. That is their number 1 purpose. Number 2 might be as a souvenir but that's much further down the list. I worked for scrapbook companies and kit clubs in the heyday, so my scrapbooks were all over company websites and blogs. They were definitely seen by the public and I had the same element of capturing the perfect moment in the photo that I do now. I think it’s the same. You’re taking photos that give you pleasure, they’re taking photos that give them pleasure. |
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Post by elaine on Jun 23, 2019 18:42:06 GMT
I think there is a difference between paper scrapbooking and doing this for social media. I still paper scrapbook. People like the ones in this article are taking these type of photos to post on social media to impress others. The photos I take when I'm on vacation most of the time don't have myself or who ever is traveling with me in them. I like capturing where I am and the people there-I usually travel internationally. Of course there are a few with me and my family in them. The bottom line is when I make a scrapbook the scrapbooks stays in my home and are viewed by myself and my family. They aren't posted online. I take the photos for my pleasure-not to impress the public. They aren't seen by the public. I think that is a huge difference. The people posted in the article take their photos simply to impress people online. That is their number 1 purpose. Number 2 might be as a souvenir but that's much further down the list. I worked for scrapbook companies and kit clubs in the heyday, so my scrapbooks were all over company websites and blogs. They were definitely seen by the public and I had the same element of capturing the perfect moment in the photo that I do now. I think it’s the same. You’re taking photos that give you pleasure, they’re taking photos that give them pleasure. I think that one of the main points of the article is that the photos are NOT, in fact, giving them pleasure, but instead are a huge source of anxiety and negative memories associated with the location/event. |
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Post by lisacharlotte on Jun 23, 2019 18:54:21 GMT
Living your life to impress others or "make them jealous" sounds like not much of a life.
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Post by 50offscrapper on Jun 24, 2019 5:29:33 GMT
I am a “I will have a perfect picture of every event” type person. My kids know they will wear the outfit I pick out and as soon as they have taken the perfect photo they can go play. They’re really good at it now. My social media game is strong and I love the compliments I always get on my photos. It’s the souvenir that I want of the vacation. There’s no difference in people doing this for social media now the way some people did for their scrapbook 15 yrs ago. I think the difference was that scrapbooks were for us or special others. Now it is curated for the masses. |
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