Vent - Questions to Ask Before Joining a Carpool

If you're on time = you're on time.

You do realize that you always being early drives her just as batty as she drives you, right?

On time is on time.

Early is early (which is just as annoying as being late).

Late is late.


You don't get to redefine that just based on your own personal opinion.

I'm not getting why being on time is a bad thing either.

If you're on time, you're on time.... That's my philosophy.

I tend to be an early to everything person and only carpool with people that I trust to be on time.

I'm very happy to do afternoon p/u 4 days a week, so I don't worry too much about being late, but 99% of the time I'm at our p/u spot before the kids and if I am late, I always text DS.

DS gets really ticked off if his morning ride is late, but I know they will always be here in plenty of time to get to school, so never stress about it and am happy not to be in early morning traffic.

Carpools never ever worked for me. From the other parent forgetting to pick up my kid to other parent not being home when I dropped their kid off, I hated every minute of it, every time.

My getting to work on time is non-negotiable. It causes a hardship for at least 31 people, plus me.

I don't do carpool in the morning, because if you can't get it together to have your kid ready on time I'm late and I can't depend on the vast majority of people. We have a semi-regular afternoon carpool, but the time constraint doesn't hold then.

Five minutes late means ten minutes behind schedule, ten minutes = thirty minutes on my end. The traffic is exponential here.

I carpooled one school year and won't do that again. It was me and 2 other families, so it seemed like it would go well.

One mom was usually running late, so we either sat and waited for her kids, or she'd be driving sorta like a bat outta hell to get to school on time, which I really didn't like.

Next, the other mom part way through the year got a job. That's great for her, but it made me and the other mom have to adjust when we would pick up and drop off to fill in for her work schedule.

Lastly, the 2nd and 3rd moms got into a fight (really it was their kids, but it carried over to the moms). So, the non-working mom dropped out of the car pool. WTH?!?!?

I drove back and forth, between 2 schools the majority of the time after that. I was soooo done when that school year was over and swore to never do it again.

But see, for me if something *starts* at 7:00 then being dropped of at 7:00 IS late. Because if you're being dropped off at 7:00 you still have to get from the car drop-off spot into the room of whatever event you're going for, take of your coat/jacket/rain boots/whatever weather-related thing you have, get out supplies, whatever. Unless you can just appear there straight out of the car, and appear ready to work/study/act/sing/whatever, then you are going to be late.

So I'm with you. This is why I hate carpools -- for me it's just a different form of a group project. ugh. Thankfully I've never had to depend on one regularly to get my kids to school. 

eta: Littlemama and I were posting at the same time, to say basically the same thing.

Carpools can be wonderful - but sometimes not. We spent one year carpooling to swimming with a family who's son really didn't want to swim. He would be late coming out of the house. The mom was picking my son up on time so I thought she had some trick on days that she was driving. Turns out her 'trick' was to tell her son to get ready, come over and get my son on time and then go back for her son. My ds would wind up sitting in the car waiting every day. At the time the kids were young - practice was not very long - so whoever drove would stay at the pool and drive home. One day we got to the pool and the boy had forgotten his swim suit. He called his mom who then called me and asked me to check through his bag and around the locker and then wanted me to drive her son home rather than making him wait until the end of practice. It was only a 45 minute session, so I said no.

On the flip side, we had a swimming carpool that went on for 4 years that was amazing.  We had other kids come and go, but mainly it was my son and a girl from a few blocks away.  The kids got along.  DH and I and the other parents were on the same page regarding timing.  Nobody ever took advantage and we both bailed each other out when a tight spot arose - on more than one occasion over the years one or the other of us drove the other person's child on a day that our own child was not swimming.  I lament losing that carpool on a regular basis.

My best carpool ever was with the principal of the elementary school my boys attended. You know the principal will be on time! She drove whoever out of our kids was going to her school and I drove whoever was in kindergarten or middle school. We did it for years. In fact, early on in our arrangement, I even dropped her daughter off at her babysitter's house for one year whenever the husband was out of town and couldn't take her.

I think some people think if it starts at 7:oo means pull into parking lot or drop off at 7. 
Even grown ups. If an events starts at 7.  Park, walk In, maybe time to pay? go to seat, get settled etc. 

i think people have to be specific with the 10 minutes early because some don't allow for that 10 minutes.  
Lateness drives me crazy

Why would being early be a pain? If I was to be sitting in your driveway, or pulled up front, with my child 10 mins early but not knocking on your door or anything why is that a problem? If I dropped off my kid 10 mins early and expect you to watch them that's different that's not carpooling.