Gennifer
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,168
Jun 26, 2014 8:22:26 GMT
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Post by Gennifer on Aug 10, 2019 7:39:02 GMT
My chiro kissed me every time I went for about 5 sessions. I regret not reporting but what good would it have done way back then? Today I would have kneed him in the nuts. Wut? Like, on the lips?
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Post by gar on Aug 10, 2019 8:57:12 GMT
I have only ever been for a massage of my shoulders and back, and I can’t imagine under what circumstances a person would need to remove all their underwear to receive a massage. Rainy_Day_Woman, why would your knickers need to come off? For a hip massage, can they not be worked around? Is it normal to be naked for a massage? OP, it all sounds very weird. He could be getting away with anything, given his work environment. It sounds like the beginning of him testing what he can get away with. Horrible, just horrible. I have worked as a masseuse and I’ve had many massages both for relaxation and from a physio for injuries etc and I’ve never been totally naked or worked on anyone totally naked. The closest would be wearing paper knickers in a Spa environment i’d say. Nothing wrong with it if everyone is happy but not the norm here anyway.
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Post by Rainy_Day_Woman on Aug 10, 2019 10:06:09 GMT
Jockscrap While not everyone will take off their underwear, it is still pretty common. If you are having your back worked on, it won't make much difference. If you are having your hips and groin area worked on, as she was, it is really normal to take them off. They do get in the way of draping and we can ruin them or stain them with oil. If people are not comfortable taking them off, absolutely we can work around that. I never insinuate that one way is better to the client but for most traditional Swedish massage with oil, it is easier if you aren't wearing them when working hips and glutes. There are other techniques / modalities where it makes less difference. The kind of massage I do has a lot of long strokes and is a bit reminiscent of lomi lomi so I use some alternative draping. Most of my clients are regulars and almost everyone takes them off.
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Aug 10, 2019 11:58:27 GMT
I have worked as a masseuse and I’ve had many massages both for relaxation and from a physio for injuries etc and I’ve never been totally naked or worked on anyone totally naked. The closest would be wearing paper knickers in a Spa environment i’d say. Nothing wrong with it if everyone is happy but not the norm here anyway. I've received many massages in many different settings (and in different countries). I usually go by the guidance of the massage therapist as to whether I am fully unclothed or I leave on my underwear. I've never had a massage in the DR that I was not fully unclothed for and they don't do much draping either -- taking full advantage of the ocean breezes on your skin as it's often in an open-air beach hut. I've also been fully unclothed at medi-spas for body treatments like scrubs and masks (often with a small towel thrown over your privates when they aren't working in that area). Conversely, I have never removed my underwear at the chiropractor's office for massage. I rarely do at my regular massage therapist, but have for sessions where we concentrated on hips and glutes. Bottom line is that if anyone does not want to be fully unclothed, any massage therapist should respect that and be more than willing to work around it.
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Post by gar on Aug 10, 2019 13:56:44 GMT
Bottom line is that if anyone does not want to be fully unclothed, any massage therapist should respect that and be more than willing to work around it. Absolutely.
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camcas
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,112
Jun 26, 2014 3:41:19 GMT
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Post by camcas on Aug 10, 2019 14:09:12 GMT
If he made you feel uncomfortable what he did was WRONG It is his job as a professional to ensure you DO NOT feel uncomfortable despite being vulnerable No need to second guess yourself HE CROSSED THE LINE HE did it You did nothing wrong Report exactly what he did and what you felt Your information may be the piece that stops someone else from being abused Any consequences of your report are the direct result of what HE did and are NOT on you So sorry this happened to you
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needshelp
New Member
Posts: 4
Aug 9, 2019 3:08:02 GMT
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Post by needshelp on Aug 10, 2019 14:09:50 GMT
It was my decision to be unclothed, as I have been with every massage I've ever had, with the exception of shiatsu. I assume that massage therapists are professionals whatever their gender.
I'd just like to thank everyone for their input, particularly @rainy_Day_Woman. I just have to say that I found your first post extremely helpful, even though it's terrible something similar happened with a long time friend, and I'm so sorry about that. I wouldn't wish this experience on anyone, but I found it to be strangely reassuring in the sense that if it can happen to a massage therapist too, then maybe I don't have to feel like such a dope and easy mark. For the first time in two weeks, I don't have a sick feeling in my gut.
I'm not yet sure how I'm going to approach reporting him. I think I need to work more in therapy on this. Again, thanks everyone.
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Post by Delta Dawn on Aug 10, 2019 14:23:09 GMT
My chiro kissed me every time I went for about 5 sessions. I regret not reporting but what good would it have done way back then? Today I would have kneed him in the nuts. Wut? Like, on the lips? Only on the lips. I told my parents but they didn’t want to do anything about it. I was only like 18 and not old enough to stop it.
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Post by littlemama on Aug 10, 2019 20:52:57 GMT
So, because of this thread, I paid extra attention during my massage today with a male massage therapist. When he was working near a "questionable" area he said. "If you feel that I am getting into your personal space or are in any way uncomfortable, please let me know." In your case, I would discuss it more with your therapist and make sure you are comfortable with whatever you decide to do.
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Post by steakgoddess on Aug 11, 2019 7:35:08 GMT
Please, report him.
Contact his employer and the State Board or whatever the licensing is in your state.
I’ve worked in the spa / wellness industry and any company worth anything will support you and take care of this “therapist”. I’ve immediately terminated therapists in the past and reported them to the state board. Given statements and ensured licenses were revoked.
I am absolutely disgusted by anyone claiming to be a therapist that would do anything even close to inappropriate with a client.
It doesn’t matter if they’ve helped you in the past, as soon as they cross that line they are a pervert and shit person.
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anniebygaslight
Drama Llama
I'd love a cup of tea. #1966
Posts: 7,402
Location: Third Rock from the sun.
Jun 28, 2014 14:08:19 GMT
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Post by anniebygaslight on Aug 11, 2019 8:02:48 GMT
Report him.
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Post by mollycoddle on Aug 11, 2019 12:37:41 GMT
I think that reporting him is the best solution for you.
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TankTop
Pearl Clutcher
Refupea #1,871
Posts: 4,831
Location: On the couch...
Jun 28, 2014 1:52:46 GMT
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Post by TankTop on Aug 11, 2019 14:06:21 GMT
The mere fact that you had so many visits and did not feel uncomfortable until now should assure you that you were NOT imagining it.
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