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Post by Amelia Bedelia on Sept 24, 2019 19:56:19 GMT
I don’t post here much but I need to share and get this off my chest. I’ve told my family and I feel like it’s over so if I keep going on about it to them, they’ll think I’m crazy. Sorry if this gets long. This morning my 13yo emailed me that they’re on lockdown because of threats the school received. We had some emails back and forth about how she was scared but knows it’s probably not really anything to worry about, and I validated her feelings and encouraged her to stay focused and told her threats are usually not carried out. Then she emails that apparently it was someone threatening gun violence at school. She told me she knows the risks of anything bad happening are low, but she just wanted to tell me she loves me and for me to tell her dad and brother she loves them too. Just in case. It turned out to be nothing, the threat wasn’t credible. It seems like it was handled well by admin. They immediately went into lockdown. Police were on the scene within minutes. It didn’t even make the local news. Even though I knew (as much as you can know in moments like these) that it wasn’t likely that my kids would be injured, I think that was the longest hour of my life. Kids aren’t supposed to worry about things like this. They’re not supposed to send goodbye emails from homeroom. Parents aren’t supposed to tell kids to stay focused even if it means not texting to say you’re scared or that they love you. I shouldn’t be worried for her brother’s safety because he hasn’t contacted me. I shouldn’t be afraid to call the school because it’ll divert resources away from keeping our kids safe. I shouldn’t be grateful that she took her Adderall this morning because I know she’ll stay focused and be less likely to freeze if she has to make a life or death decision. That’s not what Adderall is for. The fear and sadness and even the thankfulness I feel about them being safe are fading and I feel so angry and helpless. These are excerpts from the emails we sent. I’m truly grateful she’s ok, and my heart breaks for the kids and families of the kids who’ve been through actual school shootings and not just threats and lockdowns.   I just needed to get that out. It’s been a rough morning. |
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Post by hop2 on Sept 24, 2019 20:01:58 GMT
Hugs
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wellway
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,042
Jun 25, 2014 20:50:09 GMT
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Post by wellway on Sept 24, 2019 20:06:54 GMT
Sending hugs to you all.
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Post by dewryce on Sept 24, 2019 20:24:47 GMT
I don’t have any words that could possibly make you feel better, and I hate that. I’m so sorry your family went through this today.
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Post by Basket1lady on Sept 24, 2019 20:50:47 GMT
I’m so sorry.
My son’s college has been getting random bomb threats over the past six months. I’m happy to say that they announced today that they charged the person. A third year student. What the heck? Why? Just why?
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Post by disneypal on Sept 24, 2019 21:05:56 GMT
Kids aren’t supposed to worry about things like this. You are so right! We never had to worry about things like that at their age - it makes me both sad and angry that they have to deal with this. |
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Post by peasapie on Sept 24, 2019 21:10:28 GMT
That's got to be very difficult for your entire family. I hope they will have therapists to talk with the kids.
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Post by hockeymom4 on Sept 24, 2019 21:11:09 GMT
Hugs to you, reading your post brought tears to my eyes.... our precious children should not have to deal with these situations
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Sept 24, 2019 21:17:57 GMT
(((Hugs)))
I know that was upsetting and awful for you and for her.
I'm very glad she is safe, and that you are not sharing a different story with us.
Yesterday my son told me that he was glad that I bought him pointy scissors. I asked him why and he related that they had an active shooter drill and his teacher told them that they will need to fight and throw things to try to stay safe.
WTF. My third grader is going to stop a man shooting an assault rifle with a pair of kiddie scissors?!
I hate this country sometimes.
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Post by thundergal on Sept 24, 2019 21:18:39 GMT
Oh my. I'm so sorry. Sending you a big hug.
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Post by workingclassdog on Sept 24, 2019 21:25:23 GMT
That sucks. I have been through it many times now (with no text from the kids).. it seems like lockdown happens more that once a school year. Maybe I am naive but for the most part when there is no news coverage and whatever the school sends out, I am pretty sure they are just being cautious (unless of course it is more than that, which it hasn't been). I get concerned but I keep my wits until I hear otherwise.
But if you go to FB to the local pages (the school, or neighborhood) then it goes crazy over there and I avoid those pages like the plague. Those people can turn a 'cautious lockdown' into a full fledged shooting incident in 2 minutes flat.
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garcia5050
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,773 
Location: So. Calif.
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Post by garcia5050 on Sept 24, 2019 21:26:48 GMT
A couple of Saturdays ago, my DD showed me a short video that another student posted, with a gun on a bed, then slowly being raised towards a door. That was it, but it was enough to freak her out. She told me, I told her cheer coach (it was shared in her cheer group chat). Within a couple of hours, coach responds that many teachers were notified, and local PD was already on it. Made me feel better. But if she was already at school, it would be stressful for all.
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Post by Amelia Bedelia on Sept 24, 2019 21:30:11 GMT
Thanks for all your kind words.
I still haven’t heard from DS. I’m not sure if that means he wasn’t upset by it or if he’s just focusing on school to avoid thinking about it. DD said she guesses she’s okay now that it’s over, but that she was really scared at the time. I feel much better now. I’m just emotionally spent.
I’m sorry for all of you who’ve had similar experiences. It’s insane. I thought it was bad when they started doing earthquake, fire, and shooter drills on the same day to knock it all out at once, but the false alarm blows that away.
We’re fortunate because their high school has a student lounge for kids to be able to decompress and they have 2 counselors now. DD and DS both have anxiety. DS has a regular schedule with his therapist but DD only goes as needed now. I’m going to ask tonight if she wants me to make an appointment.
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Post by CarolinaGirl71 on Sept 24, 2019 21:33:06 GMT
I am so sorry that she and you (and countless other people) had to experience this. Heartbreaking!
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Post by Amelia Bedelia on Sept 24, 2019 21:35:04 GMT
That sucks. I have been through it many times now (with no text from the kids).. it seems like lockdown happens more that once a school year. Maybe I am naive but for the most part when there is no news coverage and whatever the school sends out, I am pretty sure they are just being cautious (unless of course it is more than that, which it hasn't been). I get concerned but I keep my wits until I hear otherwise. But if you go to FB to the local pages (the school, or neighborhood) then it goes crazy over there and I avoid those pages like the plague. Those people can turn a 'cautious lockdown' into a full fledged shooting incident in 2 minutes flat. I think the scariest part for me was that she was in homeroom with her advisor when it happened, and her advisor is the one who told them it was a lockdown due to threat about gun violence. It wasn’t just the kids or parents starting a bunch of rumors. And of course my heart breaks thinking about her being scared, whether it was rumor or not. She seemed to understand the gravity of the information coming from her teacher as well. |
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scrappinwithoutpeas
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,010
Location: Northern Virginia
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Post by scrappinwithoutpeas on Sept 24, 2019 21:58:41 GMT
Hugs to you, reading your post brought tears to my eyes.... our precious children should not have to deal with these situations  Me too. And I agree that no one should have to deal with these situations, least of all our kids. ((Hugs, OP)) |
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Post by beaglemom on Sept 24, 2019 22:19:14 GMT
I am so sorry your daughter had to go through this. It makes me want to cry every time I read these stories. Children should be going to school to learn and to be happy and safe. It frustrates me to no end that this has become the new normal. That a whole generation of children is having to learn lockdown drills and that these children have credible fear when they happen that they might not walk away.
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Post by hop2 on Sept 24, 2019 22:24:43 GMT
I’m so sorry. My son’s college has been getting random bomb threats over the past six months. I’m happy to say that they announced today that they charged the person. A third year student. What the heck? Why? Just why? Was it to get out of/delay tests or labs or other academic things they were unprepared for? |
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Post by freecharlie on Sept 24, 2019 22:27:01 GMT
My heart breaks that our children go through this
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Post by revirdsuba99 on Sept 24, 2019 22:28:27 GMT
So very sorry this has hit home for you and you kids... We need to find a solution........
(((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))
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Post by Basket1lady on Sept 24, 2019 22:48:25 GMT
I’m so sorry. My son’s college has been getting random bomb threats over the past six months. I’m happy to say that they announced today that they charged the person. A third year student. What the heck? Why? Just why? Was it to get out of/delay tests or labs or other academic things they were unprepared for? Neither the letter from the president nor the Attorney General’s press release stated why he did it. One was in April, another in August, and one last week. DS graduated in May, but it still makes me ill to think of it. It’s a small private college—it just goes to show that the problem is everywhere. |
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Post by PEAcan pie on Sept 24, 2019 23:09:48 GMT
My Son's High School had a shelter in place last week (not as severe) to police escort a teacher from the premises that was 4x the legal alcohol limit  Such a strange world we live in |
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Post by katlaw on Sept 24, 2019 23:19:33 GMT
My eyes teared up reading your post. Children need to feel safe at school. Not texting home to say I love you, just in case.
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Judy26
Pearl Clutcher
MOTFY Bitchy Nursemaid
Posts: 2,974
Location: NW PA
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Post by Judy26 on Sept 24, 2019 23:21:04 GMT
Lockdowns, school threats, lockdown training, lockdown practice.... these were the tipping point when I decided to retire. I was losing sleep thinking about the responsibility I had to keep students safe. And as a parent you should not have to worry about your child being hurt or worse when they are in a place that should be safe and nurturing. I’m old but not so jaded that I can be nonchalant about this threat to our humanity. What is going on in this world today?
I hope you and your children can talk about this and that your district addresses the issue so everyone can feel safe in school settings.
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muggins
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,861
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Post by muggins on Sept 24, 2019 23:26:44 GMT
My Son's High School had a shelter in place last week (not as severe) to police escort a teacher from the premises that was 4x the legal alcohol limit Such a strange world we live in Unfortunately, it’s only the USA’s love of guns that causes the strange phenomenon of frequent school shootings. Most other countries don’t have that constant threat. However a drunk teacher could happen anywhere! |
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Post by mikklynn on Sept 24, 2019 23:56:08 GMT
I don't think you are overreacting. I live in fear of the same thing with my grandchildren.
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Post by Amelia Bedelia on Sept 25, 2019 0:09:55 GMT
Both kids are home and seem ok on the surface at least. The three of us talked about it when they got home, then they retreated into their private spaces. One is painting and the other is on a cleaning binge. They both seem affected but not more than I expected, and they’re handling themselves pretty well. DH and I had plans to go see Ad Astra tonight. I mentioned that I was going to postpone that and they both told me we should keep our plans. They don’t really feel chatty so I’m giving them space tonight. They’ll talk more if they want to when they’re ready. I probably shouldn’t joke, but when I saw DS doing laundry, my first thought was that it only took a school shooting false alarm to get him to wash his socks without asking. Wonder what it’ll take to get him to scoop the litter boxes without prompting  |
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Me too. And I agree that no one should have to deal with these situations, least of all our kids.
Such a strange world we live in
