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Post by cakediva on Nov 14, 2019 13:30:20 GMT
For those of you with kids who are out of the house and paired off (married, living with somebody) - at what point (if at all) did Christmas gifts become "couple" gifts instead of separate ones?
My oldest two are both living with their significant others. One of our traditions is new jammies on Christmas Eve, and last year we included the other halves and got us all matching jammies. This was in addition to any other gifts we got everybody.
This year, both girls have asked for vaccuums - ha ha domestic adult life. One would prefer cash to pick out her own on Boxing Day deals, the other wants the actual vaccuum so she doesn't just spend the cash.
But I'm wondering when/if you start doing couple gifts instead of individual. Or do you bother?
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Post by craftedbys on Nov 14, 2019 14:16:10 GMT
DH and I have been married for 29 years. This is the first year without either of our mothers. But every Christmas we got both individual and couple gifts.
The amount of $$ spent was usually in the same ballpark, but the "big" gift varied depending on what we needed or wanted. For example, the year we got the big ass Keurig DH and I got smaller individual gifts, the year we got flannel sheets we each got bigger individual gifts
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Post by roundtwo on Nov 14, 2019 14:48:22 GMT
I give individual and couple gifts to my kids and their partners and they each get a stocking too. They have all been together for 8 or 9 years now and I gave individual gifts to all of them from the beginning and then added a couple gift when they moved in together. Sometimes the couple gift is a game, sometimes it's something for their homes and sometimes it's an experience type gift.
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Post by teddyw on Nov 14, 2019 15:15:25 GMT
I give both. Usually a gc to a restaurant for the couple and individual gifts for everyone. My dh thinks I’m over the top.
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Post by cindyupnorth on Nov 14, 2019 15:19:26 GMT
I think that would be odd. I never got couple gifts from my parents or my dh's. I don't expect I will ever give my girls and their SOs a couple gift. They all get their own individual gifts. If they want a larger gift for both of them,I would give them a GC and they can pay the rest or do whatever with it.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Nov 14, 2019 15:30:39 GMT
We got smaller individual gifts plus a check for both of us from DH’s parents, my mom just gave us a cash gift intended for both of us. She was on a fixed income and with 7 kids plus their SOs and a dozen grandkids, she didn’t have the energy or money to shop for all those people.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Aug 18, 2025 20:09:08 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Nov 14, 2019 16:00:27 GMT
Dh and I received separate gifts and now receive out own cash gift.
I am so glad my parents never did couple gifts. We like different things.
If that is where you want to go, then I guess a gift card to their favorite restaurant and movie tickets ?
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hannahruth
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,849 
Location: Adelaide, Australia
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Post by hannahruth on Nov 14, 2019 16:04:32 GMT
We give individual gifts - I figure when you become parents the gift giving peters out so I like to make sure our DS, DD and SIL get a gift just for them!
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sueg
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,140
Location: Munich
Apr 12, 2016 12:51:01 GMT
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Post by sueg on Nov 14, 2019 16:07:03 GMT
Only one of my two sons has a partner - they’ve been married nearly 9 years now. I always give them individual gifts and also put cash into their accounts. The couple get a larger cash gift than the single. This year, my married son has suggested a few things that would be ‘couple gifts’ for their house, so I will probably do that this time.
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pilcas
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,748
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Post by pilcas on Nov 14, 2019 16:23:44 GMT
My kids are still living at home but when the time comes I would do individual or a couple gift, not both. I do admit I am done with the Christmas consumerism.
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Post by Fidget on Nov 14, 2019 17:24:23 GMT
For some it may depend on their budget. For me I do both. I have 2 boys, both married. My DDIL's are just that - they are dears, I love them both. With that said, I typically buy a couples gift (at their suggestion), then I like to do something special for my DIL's. Usually gift card for a facial, or a spa day type gift. The first year I did this it occurred to me that I should probably do something for my sons too  so I started getting them something individual as well. I don't know if I'll always be able to afford doubling up on gifts, but I love doing this now while I'm still working and can afford it. I do not have any daughters and I appreciate them both so much, I like to make sure they know it!! |
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Post by 950nancy on Nov 14, 2019 17:25:55 GMT
We never got couple's gifts. For me that would have been a bummer. If someone wants something that is really expensive for their home, maybe give them the cash you would normally spend and let them cover the rest of the amount. I would not have been happy if I got something expensive for our boat that my husband wanted.
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Nov 14, 2019 17:47:14 GMT
We have four boys, two DILs, and one soon-to-be-official fiancée. They each get individual gifts and couple gifts both. As young adults, they need things like Kitchenaid mixers, gas grills, sets of dishes, etc and those make perfect couple gifts. But I also think everyone ought to have their own personal gifts to open too.
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Post by lisacharlotte on Nov 14, 2019 18:25:16 GMT
Both our mothers give us individual gifts. It’s never been “couple” gifts.
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Anita
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,891
Location: Kansas City -ish
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Post by Anita on Nov 14, 2019 19:04:01 GMT
My daughter is 28 and her husband is 30-something. They still get individual gifts.
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Post by gmcwife1 on Nov 14, 2019 19:23:06 GMT
I do both, sometimes a couple gift, sometimes an individual and some times both. It really depends on the gift and the people.
My parents do the same for all of us. Me and dh and my sister and bil each own RVs, we all love it when our mom gives us something for the RV, which is a couples gift.
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grammanisi
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,748
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Post by grammanisi on Nov 14, 2019 20:11:50 GMT
We give several individual gifts and a couple of couple gifts.
Everyone gets new pjs. This year we're up to 9pairs, not including hubby and I!
This year our daughter and oldest granddaughter both want instant pots and air fryers.
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RedSquirrelUK
Drama Llama
Posts: 7,077
Location: The UK's beautiful West Country
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Post by RedSquirrelUK on Nov 14, 2019 22:34:38 GMT
We have no kids, but niece and nephew are 13 and 16 this year. Their grandparents (my MIL and FIL) only stopped doing Christmas stockings for US a few years ago. I'm 50. No couples' gifts.
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Post by bc2ca on Nov 14, 2019 22:53:27 GMT
Gifts have always been individual in our house. The only couple/family gift that I can think of my parents giving us was a new TV when we moved into this house.
In your case, I'd give each DD a vacuum. I'd gift something else for the household to the significant others.
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melanieg
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,611
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Post by melanieg on Nov 14, 2019 22:54:59 GMT
My parents do individual gifts for my sister and brother who are married.
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Post by tentoes on Nov 14, 2019 23:59:36 GMT
We've only ever done individual gifts.
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so I started getting them something individual as well. I don't know if I'll always be able to afford doubling up on gifts, but I love doing this now while I'm still working and can afford it. I do not have any daughters and I appreciate them both so much, I like to make sure they know it!! 
