QueenoftheSloths
Drama Llama
Member Since January 2004, 2,698 forum posts PeaNut Number: 122614 PeaBoard Title: StuckOnPeas
Posts: 5,955
Jun 26, 2014 0:29:24 GMT
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Post by QueenoftheSloths on Apr 14, 2020 1:27:09 GMT
Given the extremely large number of peas complaining of cooking burnout, a lot of this advice seems unnecessarily harsh towards the OP. ahh. No. I'm 100% positive I would have said the same thing before. I'm cooking the same amt as I was before, and I'm not quarantined at home. I think men should learn to be self sufficient. If you read the whole thread, I think I pretty clearly stated that I think it is harsh to call the OP subservient and enabling. I didn't comment on what I thought her DH should or shouldn't be doing.
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Post by padresfan619 on Apr 14, 2020 1:31:04 GMT
My husband is working from home for the first time and he’s used to either buying lunch or taking leftovers. His office was near a grocery store that had a soup and salad bar that he’d go to for a quick and cheap lunch. I am trying to be mindful of what I cook for dinner to minimize waste so there’s not usually leftovers and obviously he can’t just pop over to the store every day to buy lunch.
My husband can cook but he’s still working full time. I am not, my position is currently furloughed and there’s only so much cleaning and organizing I can do in a day. It is just the two of is so quite frankly - I’m bored. Today I made a batch of Greek pasta salad that will last a few days, he can easily serve himself and take it back to his home office and there’s minimal clean up once he’s finished.
Last week I had supplies to make sandwiches and he would make himself a plate. Where I would normally make myself a sandwich with carrot sticks and cut up fruit - he just had a sandwich. And that’s ok. I think a large part of this is letting go of the expectation of what a meal should look like. If he wants to just eat chips and a drink, that’s fine.
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Post by peasapie on Apr 14, 2020 13:00:15 GMT
My husband is working from home for the first time and he’s used to either buying lunch or taking leftovers. His office was near a grocery store that had a soup and salad bar that he’d go to for a quick and cheap lunch. I am trying to be mindful of what I cook for dinner to minimize waste so there’s not usually leftovers and obviously he can’t just pop over to the store every day to buy lunch. My husband can cook but he’s still working full time. I am not, my position is currently furloughed and there’s only so much cleaning and organizing I can do in a day. It is just the two of is so quite frankly - I’m bored. Today I made a batch of Greek pasta salad that will last a few days, he can easily serve himself and take it back to his home office and there’s minimal clean up once he’s finished. Last week I had supplies to make sandwiches and he would make himself a plate. Where I would normally make myself a sandwich with carrot sticks and cut up fruit - he just had a sandwich. And that’s ok. I think a large part of this is letting go of the expectation of what a meal should look like. If he wants to just eat chips and a drink, that’s fine. Thanks - that's helpful. Mine always bought his lunch at a deli near work or took leftovers, and living in Manhattan always got takeout for dinner before we were married, so now that he's working from home he's just starting to learn to make things himself. Last week I made a pasta salad with tuna and some leftover vegetables and he ate that a couple of days and then I showed him how to make it himself. I'll do the same thing with a Greek pasta salad and he can throw some chicken into it now and then as a special bonus, LOL.
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Post by peasapie on Apr 14, 2020 13:34:07 GMT
No one is saying she's horrible for being burned out on cooking. In fact, most posters are saying she shouldn't be worrying about making lunch for a grown man. I guess I didn't express my point very well. I meant that the people calling her behavior subservient and enabling were being harsh. Thank you, and I appreciate your comments QueenoftheSloths. I am grateful for the meal suggestions many have made as I transition my new husband to learning to cook some simple stuff now that he's home every day. Yeah, I could tell him to figure it out himself. And he could tell me to figure out how to change my own oil, but fortunately we're both willing to help each other learn new things right now. Always interesting to see the Pea personalities reveal themselves...
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Jun 15, 2024 20:53:29 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Apr 14, 2020 13:51:12 GMT
I guess I didn't express my point very well. I meant that the people calling her behavior subservient and enabling were being harsh. Thank you, and I appreciate your comments QueenoftheSloths. I am grateful for the meal suggestions many have made as I transition my new husband to learning to cook some simple stuff now that he's home every day. Yeah, I could tell him to figure it out himself. And he could tell me to figure out how to change my own oil, but fortunately we're both willing to help each other learn new things right now. Always interesting to see the Pea personalities reveal themselves... Marriage is a give and take. Not a go do it yo'self kind of thing. I wonder if his love language is being helped. Having someone make something. That is how he feels loved. ? I make my husband (and kids) dinner 99% of the time. It does get old but they love it and feel loved so that makes me happy. I like that you are helping him learn. Fun time together and I bet he feels loved that you are taking the time to help him out.
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Post by cindyupnorth on Apr 14, 2020 17:19:18 GMT
Thank you, and I appreciate your comments QueenoftheSloths. I am grateful for the meal suggestions many have made as I transition my new husband to learning to cook some simple stuff now that he's home every day. Yeah, I could tell him to figure it out himself. And he could tell me to figure out how to change my own oil, but fortunately we're both willing to help each other learn new things right now. Always interesting to see the Pea personalities reveal themselves... Oh, I totally get the give and take of a marriage, and each person having a chore. Like I cook dinner, He cleans up. I do laundry, he mows the lawn and cuts firewood, etc, etc. It's all give and take. I think some of us were just surprised at what you said that he just sits there and waits for it. So obviously it must bother you, or you wouldn't have used those words. I have also learned how to do things from my hubby and visca versa. I don't think any new Pea personalities were revealed??!! LOL. just the same old Ps we've been.
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