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Post by maryland on Mar 29, 2021 21:59:41 GMT
Even if I and my whole family was fully vaccinated, I would not go to support such a selfish couple. I know the wedding is about them, but this is sooooooo about them, that they have total disregard for persons at risk. Seriously 350 people? The pandemic does not disappear just because you want to have a wedding and *some* people are vaccinated. I would not go and I would not send a gift. I agree! You said it so much better than I could. And even when I am vaccinated, I will still wear a mask. I actually don't mind them, I look much better with a pretty mask. And to feel safer.
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Post by Patter on Mar 29, 2021 22:00:46 GMT
And how is the MOB allergic to hand sanitizer? What stood out to me there was that because ONE person is allergic, they won't have it available for the hundreds of people that will be there. That is REALLY strange to me. I wouldn't go even if there weren't a pandemic. I don't do big weddings and certainly not one that is that long. That's just my opinion though and what I would do.
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Post by piebaker on Mar 29, 2021 22:11:06 GMT
Say no and send a nice gift. Your children would be at risk.
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luckyjune
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Post by luckyjune on Mar 29, 2021 22:15:52 GMT
Sounds like a drama-filled super spreader event to me. Send a gift and your best wishes for the happy couple.
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Post by lisae on Mar 29, 2021 22:30:22 GMT
No hand sanitizer (due to allergies of MOTB.) Then MOTB needs to wear gloves or not shake anyone's hand. She's putting her own health above 350 other people's. What is the point of the wrist bands if they are going to mix people up? The buffet is a poor choice. If it rains, being stuck in a tent is as bad or worse than being indoors. There are too many issues with their plans plus the extra costs you will have to incur. I'd put a bit extra in the gift and send regrets.
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Post by paulao on Mar 29, 2021 23:02:01 GMT
That would be my idea of hell. Send your regrets and a gift from their registry.
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Post by summer on Mar 29, 2021 23:16:12 GMT
Nope I would not go. I was invited to an out of state wedding that took place last weekend, I didn’t go. From the looks of of pictures on Facebook it doesn’t look like that many people outside of immediate family attended. I don’t care who’s getting married, I’m not attending a wedding during a global pandemic. I would think they would be understanding for anyone who sends their regrets. They have to understand they aren’t going to get the attendance they would have gotten if there wasn’t a deadly virus prevalent.
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Post by Tamhugh on Mar 29, 2021 23:25:15 GMT
I didn’t read all of the responses so sorry if this was already answered. I have a college friend whose kids were both married last year. Her son had a smallish wedding with everyone (including bride and groom) fully masked. They had the wristbands. Green meant comfortable with a hug, yellow was something like “comfortable with an elbow bump” and red was no contact at all. I did not attend but saw pictures with an explanation.
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Post by freecharlie on Mar 29, 2021 23:35:44 GMT
That sounds like hell when there isn't a pandemic.
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scrappinghappy
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Post by scrappinghappy on Mar 29, 2021 23:37:15 GMT
Having been at a wedding last year in March, before we knew what we know now, and having 60 guests get Covid and two of those DIE, no way, no how would I or any member of my family be attending this wedding. I am so angry at the contemplation of it, I could just SPIT!
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Post by whipea on Mar 29, 2021 23:37:15 GMT
No.
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Post by freecharlie on Mar 29, 2021 23:44:51 GMT
Ok, now that I figured it out that it is your niece...I would not miss my niece's wedding. But I say that knowing that both of my nieces are pretty smart and wouldn't do this.
I will be attending a wedding of my cousin's kid at the end of May. It will be family only at the ceremony and the reception is outdoors. Dh and i are vaccinated. There is potential that the kids will be too
My idiot cousins who won't get vaccinated will be there, but I can hold my own with them. The older generation (my parents group) are all vaccinated and four of my generation are so far.
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Post by cindyupnorth on Mar 29, 2021 23:50:55 GMT
Larger town in southern MN for the church wedding. It's not New Prague is it?
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Post by flanz on Mar 29, 2021 23:54:03 GMT
No way would I consider going, niece or not. Bluntly, I think they're being reckless and stupid. And if you go and come home to your kids who stay home... you would potentially bring Covid home to them.
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Post by cindyupnorth on Mar 29, 2021 23:56:43 GMT
If I would have gone before, I would go now. I'm vaccinated and have been exposed more closely than this anyway wearing just a surgical mask, never got infected, so I feel comfortable going to a wedding. I think I still feel weird about people getting close enough to breathe my air without a mask though. I might wear one when sitting close to people, while not eating. We are seeing very few Covid cases at my hospital these days and I haven't been around any symptomatic known cases in a few weeks at least so I don't feel that I'd be a source of infection. If that changed, I would probably stay home. I agree with zee. I would probably feel comfortable if it was someone I was really close too. The whole bracelet coding is just sooo odd?!! Hospitlalizations and cases are going way down, so who knows by June what it will be like. Up here anyone over 16 can get the COVID shot now. I would not do hugs or handshakes, but elbow taps.
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peabay
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Post by peabay on Mar 30, 2021 0:01:30 GMT
Not one person in my family would attend that.
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peabay
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Post by peabay on Mar 30, 2021 0:17:40 GMT
Yeah, I am trying to not get snarky, but discussing this brings out the snark. The MOB is my SIL. She has a "fragrance" allergy and has "lung damage"----yet got covid and no issues. The invites say no fragrances allowed. One of my other SILs (my friend) is decorating (she does it as a side job and why I know a lot of this). She had fake greenery out during their meeting last week and SIL couldn't be in the same room.....yet....this is being held in a backyard of a "master gardener"....they are just going to pray she doesn't have any reactions to the flowers. You have no idea what can and can't trigger an fragrance allergy. Real flowers don't usually. The fake greenery could have had an artificial scent or just a plastic chemical scent that triggered her. I can't handle people that have washed their clothes in too strong of a detergent, go in a house that had candles going a day ago never mind the obvious perfumes and scented lotions etc. Most hand sanitizers are too strong for me. I could go on listing things. What is the point of wrist bands if people are at mixed tables? Self serve buffet, not good. Hopefully they ordered extra sinks for the portapotties so they don't run out of water. But 350 would be a no from me. I had a friend with a fragrance allergy. It was really debilitating. Someone with strong deodorant on could set her off.
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moodyblue
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Post by moodyblue on Mar 30, 2021 0:24:42 GMT
If I would have gone before, I would go now. I'm vaccinated and have been exposed more closely than this anyway wearing just a surgical mask, never got infected, so I feel comfortable going to a wedding. I think I still feel weird about people getting close enough to breathe my air without a mask though. I might wear one when sitting close to people, while not eating. We are seeing very few Covid cases at my hospital these days and I haven't been around any symptomatic known cases in a few weeks at least so I don't feel that I'd be a source of infection. If that changed, I would probably stay home. I agree with zee. I would probably feel comfortable if it was someone I was really close too. The whole bracelet coding is just sooo odd?!! Hospitlalizations and cases are going way down, so who knows by June what it will be like. Up here anyone over 16 can get the COVID shot now. I would not do hugs or handshakes, but elbow taps. I agree that things could be way different in June - but in my area, and many states, case numbers are on the rise and so are hospitalizations. One of the local hospital systems saw the number of people in the hospital with COVID triple over a few days last week, and case numbers have jumped way up. Regardless of the local trends wherever this wedding and reception are, a wedding of that size will have a significant number of out of town guests.
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Post by littlemama on Mar 30, 2021 0:26:11 GMT
Not a chance in hell that we would attend that event, even if we were fully vaccinated.
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Post by pierkiss on Mar 30, 2021 0:29:59 GMT
I would not attend. I would send a gift and we’ll wishes, but we would for sure not be going to that event. Vaccinated or not, a party that big is a really terrible idea right now.
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sassyangel
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Post by sassyangel on Mar 30, 2021 0:52:22 GMT
If I would have gone before, I would go now. I'm vaccinated and have been exposed more closely than this anyway wearing just a surgical mask, never got infected, so I feel comfortable going to a wedding. I think I still feel weird about people getting close enough to breathe my air without a mask though. I might wear one when sitting close to people, while not eating. We are seeing very few Covid cases at my hospital these days and I haven't been around any symptomatic known cases in a few weeks at least so I don't feel that I'd be a source of infection. If that changed, I would probably stay home. I agree with zee. I would probably feel comfortable if it was someone I was really close too. The whole bracelet coding is just sooo odd?!! Hospitlalizations and cases are going way down, so who knows by June what it will be like. Up here anyone over 16 can get the COVID shot now. I would not do hugs or handshakes, but elbow taps. Except they’re not going down, anymore. 😕 www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2021/03/29/coronavirus-covid-live-updates-us/
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tracylynn
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Post by tracylynn on Mar 30, 2021 0:56:30 GMT
If I would have gone before, I would go now. I'm vaccinated and have been exposed more closely than this anyway wearing just a surgical mask, never got infected, so I feel comfortable going to a wedding. I think I still feel weird about people getting close enough to breathe my air without a mask though. I might wear one when sitting close to people, while not eating. We are seeing very few Covid cases at my hospital these days and I haven't been around any symptomatic known cases in a few weeks at least so I don't feel that I'd be a source of infection. If that changed, I would probably stay home. I agree with zee. I would probably feel comfortable if it was someone I was really close too. The whole bracelet coding is just sooo odd?!! Hospitlalizations and cases are going way down, so who knows by June what it will be like. Up here anyone over 16 can get the COVID shot now. I would not do hugs or handshakes, but elbow taps. That is not true. Rates are going back up and so are hospitalizations in like 24 States. And I'm pretty sure MN is included on that list.
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Post by Really Red on Mar 30, 2021 1:02:10 GMT
The thing is you don’t want to go. And asking on 2peas you are guaranteed to get the responses that you want (based on previous posts/history of the board...no snark). And that is ok...don’t go. But if you are trying to figure out a way to go bbkeef said it well. Bring your own food (which you can eat in the long azz trip to the reception). Steer clear of the buffet. Bring your own hand sanitizer...I know they asked guests to be fragrance free...but seriously. Of the 350 guests my guess is that more then half will be scented up. As guests are getting ready they are going to follow their typical daily routine and grab for their favorite scent from Bath and Body works. As for the bands...who is checking the vaccination cards. People can say whatever they want as to if they have been vaccinated...it is sort of an honor system. I can honestly say that I am torn. 2peas won't make my decision for me; I was curious and making sure I wasn't crazy for questioning all of this. If there wasn't a pandemic, I would be a little annoyed by some of this, but we would be going 100%. With a pandemic, I really can't decide what to do. I am not really worried that much about me, personally, but all of this goes against so many principles, and I am trying to decide what is worse: not showing up for my niece's special day (I genuinely like her) or participating in an event that seems irresponsible and/or even illegal (certainly questionable). There are so many ways she could have done this without the overly large production during a pandemic (albeit a dying one by June, hopefully). I want to support her and be there on her big day. I want to see the wedding because I am curious and nosey. I don't mind dressing up that much. I don't want to see this turn into a super spreader event and participate in that. I don't want to deal with the MAGA greens vs Snowflake "other colors" vibe that is likely to permeate. I don't want to condone this level of frivolity and apathy for covid. I want my 75 year old anti-vax MIL and (I think a lot the rest of the bridal family are anti-vax too---some are for sure...not sure about the bride and groom) to suffer consequences for their choice not to vaccinate (she really wants us all there). I want to put aside my feelings and make logical choices as well, so that is why I asked the peas--to get some different perspectives. I thought, based on what I have seen, I would get a variety of responses. Yes, a lot are similar, but they are not all the same. ETA: The bands are just "your comfort level." Has nothing to do with vaccinated or not. They don't care. I am sure you love your niece, but holy crap. The whole wedding screams ME ME ME. We are ALL sick and tired of it all. Even those of us who are introverts and like staying at home. I just do not understand why some people are so hung up on all the trappings of a wedding to the point where they cannot see how it affects others. Of course you are sad not to attend (if you choose not to), but at this point in the pandemic, it is still the right thing to do. Maybe - just maybe - if it were a fall wedding, I might think you'd be okay.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Mar 30, 2021 1:07:38 GMT
I agree with zee. I would probably feel comfortable if it was someone I was really close too. The whole bracelet coding is just sooo odd?!! Hospitlalizations and cases are going way down, so who knows by June what it will be like. Up here anyone over 16 can get the COVID shot now. I would not do hugs or handshakes, but elbow taps. That is not true. Rates are going back up and so are hospitalizations in like 24 States. And I'm pretty sure MN is included on that list. Minnesota *IS* on that list.
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Post by cindyupnorth on Mar 30, 2021 1:22:51 GMT
We may be rising, but that’s after a lot have been way down. Going from 0 cases in our hospital to 2 cases this week, yes is an increase, but nothing significant. With vaccinations now open to everyone I can see things much better by June is what I’m saying
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The Great Carpezio
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Post by The Great Carpezio on Mar 30, 2021 1:32:02 GMT
Yeah, I am trying to not get snarky, but discussing this brings out the snark. The MOB is my SIL. She has a "fragrance" allergy and has "lung damage"----yet got covid and no issues. The invites say no fragrances allowed. One of my other SILs (my friend) is decorating (she does it as a side job and why I know a lot of this). She had fake greenery out during their meeting last week and SIL couldn't be in the same room.....yet....this is being held in a backyard of a "master gardener"....they are just going to pray she doesn't have any reactions to the flowers. You have no idea what can and can't trigger an fragrance allergy. Real flowers don't usually. The fake greenery could have had an artificial scent or just a plastic chemical scent that triggered her. I can't handle people that have washed their clothes in too strong of a detergent, go in a house that had candles going a day ago never mind the obvious perfumes and scented lotions etc. Most hand sanitizers are too strong for me. I could go on listing things. What is the point of wrist bands if people are at mixed tables? Self serve buffet, not good. Hopefully they ordered extra sinks for the portapotties so they don't run out of water. But 350 would be a no from me. I don’t doubt she has the allergy or that it can be triggered by many different things; just trust me that without going into details, there have been some situations of convenience, and there have been various medical issues over the years with corresponding and varying levels of production. Just trust me. It is real with a large dose of drama thrown in. I have known her for over 30 years. There are trends.
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Post by scrappychick on Mar 30, 2021 1:33:43 GMT
Not a chance in hell.
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sassyangel
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Post by sassyangel on Mar 30, 2021 1:34:08 GMT
We may be rising, but that’s after a lot have been way down. Going from 0 cases in our hospital to 2 cases this week, yes is an increase, but nothing significant. With vaccinations now open to everyone I can see things much better by June is what I’m saying It completely depends on *if* vaccination rates can outrun infection rates of a variant that is documented as being more lethal and infectious than the previous surge virus was. Fingers crossed. 🤞🏼
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The Great Carpezio
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Post by The Great Carpezio on Mar 30, 2021 1:35:16 GMT
Larger town in southern MN for the church wedding. It's not New Prague is it? No, farther down 169. *city a bit smaller than the city I live in.*. I can message you. I just don’t want anyone to run across this somehow some way.
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Post by mollycoddle on Mar 30, 2021 1:40:33 GMT
.If you decide to go, that’s one thing. If you feel hesitant(as I would) because they are not taking precautions, that is something else. They have no right to expect you to go if they are not even taking basic precautions.
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