casii
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,466 
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Post by casii on Aug 17, 2021 13:56:05 GMT
I'm marking this political myself to save someone else the trouble.
Backstory, my father is an ardent Trump supporter. To the point I'm afraid he has quite fallen down the Q rabbit hole. He spent all of the Trump years posting incredibly hateful memes on social media. No facts. Just whatever propped up his confirmation bias.
When the Sandy Hook shootings happened, both my nieces were the same age as those young children and they happen to live very near in CT. I actually called my sister in a panic asking what was the name of the school they attended because I was flipping out. What was the first thing my father posted on FB? Not prayers, condolences, thoughts. He went on a rant about 2nd amendment rights.
Last year for my 50th birthday, he sent me Sean Hannity's new book. That was it. (Let's not even discuss how one of the chapters was celebrating Trump's triumph over covid.)
My niece who turned 14 today, my middle child and I all have birthdays a few days apart. My sister and her husband are decidedly not Trump fans. It's no secret that I feel Trump unleashed the ugly underbelly among many Americans and my father knows that.
What did he get my niece for her birthday? A My Pillow gift card delivered via my sister's email. I don't believe this was a choice he made because he believes My Pillow makes a superior product. If I get one, I can shrug it off because l have no problem treating myself on my birthday big time. But to do that to a kid? If he gives one to my daughter whose birthday is on Saturday though, I may choose violence. Oh don't worry, not actual violence. He lives in AR, refuses to be vaccinated and I refuse to travel to a hotspot. Chill people. I will make it known how I feel about his choice to weaponize what should be a day of celebration.
I just needed to get this out to someone somewhere because DH is on a conference call in the next room and it might not be the best time for a primal scream.
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Post by gar on Aug 17, 2021 13:59:07 GMT
Ugh....I hear you!
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Loydene
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,639
Location: Albuquerque, New Mexico
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Post by Loydene on Aug 17, 2021 14:01:20 GMT
It is so sad that he can't put aside his views to celebrate his own grandchildren with an "age appropriate" gift. He is reap what he is sowing.
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Post by mollycoddle on Aug 17, 2021 14:03:30 GMT
Oh boy. I feel for all of you, especially your niece. I can’t imagine how frustrating that must be.
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Post by freecharlie on Aug 17, 2021 14:04:48 GMT
First, I am a petty asshole.
Send him a receipt for a donation to The Lincoln Project, Andy Democratic candidate, Planned Parenthood...
Send him either of Obama's books or Bob Woodward's unflattering Trump book. Or who's Boat is this Boat[I believe those proceeds still go to charity)
Or send a thank you note that says you will be donating the pillow to the refugee camp.
He's not punishing the child, just being an asshole
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Post by MichyM on Aug 17, 2021 14:11:18 GMT
Or send a thank you note that says you will be donating the pillow to the refugee camp. He's not punishing the child, just being an asshole BINGO. That is perfect. |
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Post by revirdsuba99 on Aug 17, 2021 14:11:33 GMT
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Post by jeremysgirl on Aug 17, 2021 14:14:08 GMT
Or send a thank you note that says you will be donating the pillow to the refugee camp. This is perfect! |
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amom23
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,333
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Post by amom23 on Aug 17, 2021 14:14:08 GMT
If it were me his gifts would be hitting the trash can and I would cut off ties. Sharing DNA doesn't make you family. Toxic people don't need a place in our lives.
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Post by kiera on Aug 17, 2021 14:17:31 GMT
Sounds like he's well on his way to making "why don't my kids call anymore" posts. I'm sorry you're having to deal with that. It's truly scary how easily so many people have fallen down that hole. I'm petty like freecharlie... if he wants to send you Hannity's book, send him Michelle Obama's Becoming. Make a donation to the ACLU in his name. |
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Anita
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,646
Location: Kansas City -ish
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Post by Anita on Aug 17, 2021 14:23:01 GMT
Sadly, he's alienating himself from his own family with this aggressive toxicity. I'm sorry.  I like the idea about donating the pillow to a refugee camp. |
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tracylynn
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,869
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Post by tracylynn on Aug 17, 2021 14:50:38 GMT
That's incredibly sad.
My grandmother (mom's mom) wasn't quite so bad before she died, but nearly. My mom was an only child, therefore my and my brother her only grandchildren. She did a very good job of spewing her right-wing hate, prejudice and racism before she died at almost 82. We asked her many times to not talk politics because she knew we didn't agree with her. Just like her religion, I'm sure she thought she could "save us".
All she managed to do was die lonely and alone. We hadn't cut her out completely, but contact was minimized and she truly didn't understand why (and no, she did not have dementia - she just couldn't, or wouldn't, put 2 and 2 together).
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Post by elaine on Aug 17, 2021 15:00:07 GMT
casii, I “liked” your post simply to let you know that I heard you. I love the idea of making donations to your favorite cause in return in his name and sending him the receipt. Planned Parenthood would be at the top of my list for a variety of reasons. I’m sure that they can use the My Pillow at any of the immigrant holding facilities/jails along the border.
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SweetieBsMom
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,612
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Post by SweetieBsMom on Aug 17, 2021 15:03:52 GMT
First, I am a petty asshole. Send him a receipt for a donation to The Lincoln Project, Andy Democratic candidate, Planned Parenthood... Send him either of Obama's books or Bob Woodward's unflattering Trump book. Or who's Boat is this Boat Or send a thank you note that says you will be donating the pillow to the refugee camp. He's not punishing the child, just being an asshole All of the above is AWESOME. If my Dad were alive (passed in May '19) I'd expect I wouldn't be talking to him (very ardent supporter of Trump) or the conversation would be severely limited. I have an Aunt, who I love dearly, who I can't call because I can't listen to her go on and on about Trump. I texted my cousin yesterday (her daughter) saying "OMG, at this rate I won't be able to talk to your mother ever again!" (due to what happened in Afghanistan). When I do call her it's mental gymnastics to keep her off of Trump/COVID/Biden. I'm EXHAUSTED by the time we're done. And she knows how I feel but hammers and hammers and hammers. I owe her a call this weekend and I don't think I have it in me. |
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momto4kiddos
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,151
Jun 26, 2014 11:45:15 GMT
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Post by momto4kiddos on Aug 17, 2021 15:10:37 GMT
Wow, i'd have thought more along the line that he's clueless, but you know him best!
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casii
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,466
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Post by casii on Aug 17, 2021 15:36:13 GMT
Thanks Peas. I feel & appreciate the commiseration. Especially from those of you who are in the same boat at myself. I've made a policy to never discuss politics with my dad for the past several years and if I do have a political post on social media, I've always been careful never to call names, make comments on appearance of people (if there was a meme insulting the appearance of a Democratic woman, he shared almost every one of them) or blindly repost memes. I occasionally share a political post in the form of a Heather Cox Richardson repost once in a while. He cannot help himself from injecting Trump into every family event.
And momto4kiddos, with the way that Mike Lindell of My Pillow keeps himself in the news frequently with baseless claims that the election was stolen from Trump, it's unlikely that this would be a clueless move in my dad's part. To suggest it would be is to believe he's unplugged from Fox, OAN and the variety of other sites he chooses to glean his information from.
I'll see how my sister responds to him on behalf of my niece if she chooses to. We'll see what happens this weekend with my DD's big day and my own.
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Post by scrapcat on Aug 17, 2021 15:45:24 GMT
This is sad and I'm sorry for you and the grandchildren. I was just thinking how my grandfather wasn't like a doting grandfather, but I have good & fun memories of him. It's sad that he would want his legacy to his grandchildren to be so marred in political nonsense that kids don't care about anyways. I guess it can be used as a teachable moment, but gosh, it used to be the nuclear family institution was the strongest one. I always think I can't be more surprised at the stance some people take politically anymore, but seems to keep happening. *sigh*
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naby64
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,932
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Post by naby64 on Aug 17, 2021 15:54:37 GMT
Wow, I just don't get some people.
But you may remember I am in AR, you just give me his address and I'll do a slow roll in front of his house.
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Post by mikklynn on Aug 17, 2021 16:30:06 GMT
I'm primal screaming for you! OMG.
I would absolutely donate the stupid pillow. I wouldn't waste my money sending a retaliatory gift.
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Post by elaine on Aug 17, 2021 16:37:24 GMT
I'm primal screaming for you! OMG. I would absolutely donate the stupid pillow. I wouldn't waste my money sending a retaliatory gift. Although, donating money to a good cause isn’t wasting money. |
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Post by Eddie-n-Harley on Aug 17, 2021 17:13:07 GMT
Wow, i'd have thought more along the line that he's clueless, but you know him best! Clueless is buying your 14 year old granddaughter a craft kit marked ages 3-6, or a t-shirt three sizes too big. Sending a myPillow gc to the kid via her mother is 100% intentional. |
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Post by Really Red on Aug 17, 2021 18:01:23 GMT
First, I am a petty asshole. Send him a receipt for a donation to The Lincoln Project, Andy Democratic candidate, Planned Parenthood... Send him either of Obama's books or Bob Woodward's unflattering Trump book. Or who's Boat is this Boat[I believe those proceeds still go to charity) Or send a thank you note that says you will be donating the pillow to the refugee camp.
He's not punishing the child, just being an asshole
Brilliant, as others said. Just brilliant. casii I am sorry. It is a big cross to bear and I hope the grandkids are bigger people than your dad. I was so lucky to have a liberal father. My mom was an R until Clinton and then turned D all the way through Obama (when she passed). I use her as an example a lot, because she was adamantly anti-abortion and she never ever let one issue influence who she voted for. Regardless, my mom would have never contributed to anti-abortion causes and given the "present" to the grandchild. Does he have to be right to the point of losing his entire family? How very, very sad that is. |
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Post by Zee on Aug 17, 2021 18:10:02 GMT
Haha I love sending it to refugees.
My dad is the opposite, he's glued to CNN and MSNBC and he's miserable. All he thinks about is global warming and Trumpsters and Covid. The sky is falling! He never enjoys anything anymore because he's too busy going on about how stupid everyone is and how we're doomed. He's 70, not sure why he'd want to live that way but it's like he's given up on humanity and can't enjoy anything anymore. I hate it.
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casii
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,466
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Post by casii on Aug 17, 2021 18:59:08 GMT
Wow, I just don't get some people. But you may remember I am in AR, you just give me his address and I'll do a slow roll in front of his house. I would totally take you up on that if I wouldn't fear for your life during that slow roll. He lives way outside of town and has a driveway back to his house where you'd have to go past his buddy, TK, who might have time to call. Both are huge gun collectors and Dad keeps a loaded shotgun propped up by the front door. But if you're ever in the Ozark area and see a man who will likely be wearing a veteran themed hat, veteran or Trump themed tshirt with suspenders, give him the stink eye. It's probably my dad. |
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Post by hop2 on Aug 17, 2021 19:29:25 GMT
Wow, I just don't get some people. But you may remember I am in AR, you just give me his address and I'll do a slow roll in front of his house. I would totally take you up on that if I wouldn't fear for your life during that slow roll. He lives way outside of town and has a driveway back to his house where you'd have to go past his buddy, TK, who might have time to call. Both are huge gun collectors and Dad keeps a loaded shotgun propped up by the front door. But if you're ever in the Ozark area and see a man who will likely be wearing a veteran themed hat, veteran or Trump themed tshirt with suspenders, give him the stink eye. It's probably my dad. Anyone still wearing Trump clothing after 1/6 has gotten stink eye from me. Stink eye + raise eyebrows + obviously questioning their sanity written all over my mask covered face. |
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purplebee
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,734
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Post by purplebee on Aug 17, 2021 20:14:38 GMT
Wow, I just don't get some people. But you may remember I am in AR, you just give me his address and I'll do a slow roll in front of his house. Also in AR. I feel your pain. He sounds like lots of the trump humpers in this area. Donate that MyPillow to a refugee shelter! Awesome idea, so satisfying…. |
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Post by 950nancy on Aug 17, 2021 20:20:07 GMT
I'd send the thank-you as mentioned above and then maybe say I think it is sad that these will be the(last/final-something like that) memories of her grandpa she will have.
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Post by leftturnonly on Aug 17, 2021 20:30:53 GMT
Taking all political talk out of my response.
People give gifts all the time in an effort to "teach" a point of view, yet no gift is as unwelcome or received as poorly.
My kids used to get bad plastic toys that broke nearly as soon as they were unwrapped from family. I hated that's what they got, but we just politely said "Thank You" and got on with our lives. Why not just consider your dad's gifts in the same category? Thank him and move on.
Or, you can make a big deal about them and feed energy into family divisiveness.
What someone chooses to give you is their choice, but your response is entirely yours.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Aug 17, 2021 22:49:23 GMT
First, I am a petty asshole. Send him a receipt for a donation to The Lincoln Project, Andy Democratic candidate, Planned Parenthood... Send him either of Obama's books or Bob Woodward's unflattering Trump book. Or who's Boat is this Boat[I believe those proceeds still go to charity) Or send a thank you note that says you will be donating the pillow to the refugee camp.He's not punishing the child, just being an asshole This was my immediate thought too! The money has already been spent unfortunately, but at least the stupid pillow could be put to good use by someone who desperately needs it. |
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mimima
Drama Llama
Stay Gold, Ponyboy
Posts: 5,020
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Post by mimima on Aug 17, 2021 23:08:22 GMT
Or send a thank you note that says you will be donating the pillow to the refugee camp. He's not punishing the child, just being an asshole BINGO. That is perfect. I agree! That's awesome |
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I like the idea about donating the pillow to a refugee camp.
