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Post by MsChiff on Oct 4, 2021 21:42:57 GMT
A third friend Abby invited four friends, including me and also Lisa, to her house for an indoor wine night in a few weeks. I responded yes, and Lisa responded that she’d like to come too if we all agree to take rapid covid tests (that she’d provide). Abby is not thrilled about taking a test to host a get-together at her own home, and messaged me to see what I thought. I can see both sides. What say the Peas? ETA Abby and all four of her invitees are fully vaccinated. We all have children 6 and under who are not yet vaccinated. Abby in no way demanded, insisted, or dictated that everyone must take a test; she made a polite request of the other three people to agree to take a test. I'm really happy that many of you aren't my friends because of the hatefulness and intolerance in your responses. These four women are friends; if you can't be honest with your friends, who can you be honest and open with? Friends show love and support; not judgment and hatefulness. They help each other. They clearly know each other well enough that they know Lisa is overly cautious regarding Covid and they chose to invite her anyway. If I were Lisa and I didn't feel comfortable making such a polite request of my friends, they wouldn't be my friends. Likewise, the others should feel comfortable answering honestly. Personally, I'd take the test without a moment's hesitation if it made my friend feel more comfortable starting to venture out.
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melissa
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,912
Jun 25, 2014 20:45:00 GMT
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Post by melissa on Oct 4, 2021 21:49:07 GMT
I would do it for a friend. I might think she was overly anxious but I would respect her anxiety.
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Post by catmom on Oct 4, 2021 23:07:14 GMT
I wouldn't hesitate, especially if it makes a friend feel more comfortable getting together during a stressful time. I wouldn't personally ask it of others as long as I knew they were vaccinated, but I don't think that it's a terrible thing to ask, especially since they have little ones who can't be vaccinated yet.
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Post by catmom on Oct 4, 2021 23:13:14 GMT
If you invited a guest and they said they would like to attend but they had food allergies and needed you to plan the menu accordingly, would that also be poor guest behavior? So often we are told to advocate for ourselves, but then slapped down when we do. I'm glad I don't have anyone to socialize with, because I would surely put a foot wrong and be the subject of scorn and criticism. I think that's a great analogy, and a request most people would try to accommodate if possible. Compassion for others' circumstances goes such a long way.
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Post by katiejane on Oct 4, 2021 23:38:03 GMT
I really don't see the problem. She is not being demanding but trying to be responsible and careful. She has offered to get the tests aswell.
But then in my friendships this is common practice. We have free tests in the UK. My whole family tests twice a week and we all test in addition before going to an event. When I meet up with friends we all test before hand. We keep windows open to keep airflow and if possible meet outside.
Test aren't perfect but they do pick up some infections and that is better than nothing.
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Post by myshelly on Oct 4, 2021 23:54:06 GMT
No, I wouldn’t do it.
Why?
I don’t believe those tests are accurate.
Let’s say I do it and get a positive. Now I have to find somewhere to go to get a regular test? No, thank you.
It’s creating a problem for me and my family that just seems unnecessary.
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Post by FuzzyMutt on Oct 5, 2021 0:33:56 GMT
As a vaccinated (Moderna Mar/April) person sitting here on my LAST day of 10 days of quarantine (YAYYYY!!) due to having a "rare" breakthrough case of Covid (my guy, his son-who we haven't seen in about a month, and 3 of his roommates - all fully vaxxed are positive right now!) I can't help but a little paranoid about reintegrating with my loved ones.... CDC says tomorrow is ok... I don't think so! The vaccine isn't a shield. It isn't an impenetrable guard. And anyone that takes being vaccinated as a guarantee, or, honestly, trusts anything to do with this virus, is too optimistic. We both ended up pretty miserable, not scary... but definitely worse than any "cold" I've had in the last 25 years I can remember.
I see absolutely nothing wrong with asking if it would be an option. And anyone that finds that offensive... I agree... They must not like their friends.
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schizo319
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,030
Jun 28, 2014 0:26:58 GMT
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Post by schizo319 on Oct 5, 2021 1:37:19 GMT
If it were my 'party', I would probably move it outdoors, but I have also been pretty cautious and am more comfortable gathering outdoors. If that weren't an option (because of weather for example), I'd take a test.
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Post by pjaye on Oct 5, 2021 1:56:01 GMT
Let’s say I do it and get a positive. Now I have to find somewhere to go to get a regular test? No, thank you. Technically - you don't. In the scenario set out by the OP, you'd just go home and not be a part of the get together. Who is going to make you get a test? Of course most reasonable/sensible people would probably go and get tested to see if they have covid or not, but the fact remains it is entirely your choice if you do or don't. Not a choice I would personally recommend, but denial is still an option.
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Post by myshelly on Oct 5, 2021 2:14:52 GMT
Let’s say I do it and get a positive. Now I have to find somewhere to go to get a regular test? No, thank you. Technically - you don't. In the scenario set out by the OP, you'd just go home and not be a part of the get together. Who is going to make you get a test? Of course most reasonable/sensible people would probably go and get tested to see if they have covid or not, but the fact remains it is entirely your choice if you do or don't. Not a choice I would personally recommend, but denial is still an option. If I hadn’t taken any test in the first place, I wouldn’t be faced with the dilemma. So I wouldn’t take the test for the friend in the first place.
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Post by christine58 on Oct 6, 2021 17:12:56 GMT
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pinklady
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,588
Nov 14, 2016 23:47:03 GMT
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Post by pinklady on Oct 6, 2021 18:10:19 GMT
Technically - you don't. In the scenario set out by the OP, you'd just go home and not be a part of the get together. Who is going to make you get a test? Of course most reasonable/sensible people would probably go and get tested to see if they have covid or not, but the fact remains it is entirely your choice if you do or don't. Not a choice I would personally recommend, but denial is still an option. If I hadn’t taken any test in the first place, I wouldn’t be faced with the dilemma. So I wouldn’t take the test for the friend in the first place. In other word, stop testing and COVID just disappears. Where have we heard that before?
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Post by Darcy Collins on Oct 6, 2021 18:15:21 GMT
I'm fully vaccinated and had to test to go on vacation. It wouldn't bother me to test if it makes my friend feel better - although do agree that there are issues with false positives. Luckily testing is still easy to obtain and free here, so if I needed a pcr test it wouldn't be a big deal.
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QueenoftheSloths
Drama Llama
Member Since January 2004, 2,698 forum posts PeaNut Number: 122614 PeaBoard Title: StuckOnPeas
Posts: 5,955
Jun 26, 2014 0:29:24 GMT
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Post by QueenoftheSloths on Oct 27, 2021 23:50:28 GMT
Wondering what ended up happening here?
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pridemom
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,843
Jul 12, 2014 21:58:10 GMT
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Post by pridemom on Oct 28, 2021 1:25:29 GMT
How much do you care about making your friend feel comfortable and included?
That’s really the question here.
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