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Post by littlemama on Jun 29, 2023 10:08:15 GMT
No and we also sleep in a full-sized bed. We may get a queen for our next mattress, but when we have slept in a king at a hotel, we end up only sleeping in about 2/3 of the bed. When dh had covid (before I also got it), he slept on an air mattress in the living room and neither of us slept well
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Post by Bridget in MD on Jun 29, 2023 11:47:04 GMT
I am a very light sleeper. I need to have it quiet, dark, fan on, room cold, weighted blanket. Absolutely NO!! >> snoring, snortling, nose whistling, gurgling, flip-flopping, groaning, moving around, sleep talking, getting up and down, farting, etc...allowed. Edited to add: I know this from experience >> The quieter someone is trying to be in the morning to not wake the other person, the louder they are. This is my DH, and I am the person trying to be quiet and making things worse! This thread is funny bc just last night DH went to sleep on the couch in our bedroom. We also have a king. I was out of town last week and he said he slept GREAT when i was gone, but now that I am back, he can't sleep, I am too restless or noisy. Plus I get up at least 2x to pee at night. I told him when DD goes back to college I am seriously considering sleeping in her room, or he should. I also told him to go sleep in the top bunk of DS's bed. He laughed, but i am serious!
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SweetieBsMom
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,618
Jun 25, 2014 19:55:12 GMT
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Post by SweetieBsMom on Jun 29, 2023 11:52:59 GMT
DH & I did. He was a terrible snorer. He then got a CPAP machine but had terminal cancer and me getting up/getting ready for work would wake him up and on the flip side he was up late and I would go to bed early. So we decided separate rooms worked best for us.
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smartypants71
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,714
Location: Houston, TX
Jun 25, 2014 22:47:49 GMT
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Post by smartypants71 on Jun 29, 2023 12:32:42 GMT
Only if I fall asleep on the couch. He knows to never wake me when that happens because I am a nightmare when that happens!
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hannahruth
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,621
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Aug 29, 2014 18:57:20 GMT
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Post by hannahruth on Jun 29, 2023 12:46:27 GMT
Sometimes we do - I usually stay up later than DH and it is easier to sleep in the guest room. Plus we both snore and sometimes it just gets too much.
I actually prefer the guest room as it is at the rear of the house and it is quieter and to me it is a much calmer room.
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Post by Susie_Homemaker on Jun 29, 2023 13:02:30 GMT
Isn't the CPAP more annoying than the snoring? Not the one that my DH has. He bought the small travel size CPAP and that's the one that he uses every night. It is silent, I never hear it. He hates it because of the restriction of the hose, but he wears it every night. The CPAP is the reason we can sleep together every night.
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Post by mom on Jun 29, 2023 13:39:34 GMT
Oh hell no! I married him so that I could sleep with him every night for the rest of my life. that’s my thinking as well. I put up with his crap during the day so I can roll over and have his warm body beside me when I am cold at night. 😂
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Post by KikiPea on Jun 29, 2023 13:43:09 GMT
We sleep in the same king bed. The only time we may sleep in a different room is if one of us can’t sleep, or is sick and doesn’t want to disturb the other. We’ve been married almost 27 years.
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Post by mikklynn on Jun 29, 2023 13:49:12 GMT
DH & I did. He was a terrible snorer. He then got a CPAP machine but had terminal cancer and me getting up/getting ready for work would wake him up and on the flip side he was up late and I would go to bed early. So we decided separate rooms worked best for us. We did the same thing once DH had a feeding tube. He was too nervous that I would somehow hook it to sleep together. It worked out for the best the last 18 months of his life. Befoer that neither of us could sleep well without the other.
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purplebee
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,738
Jun 27, 2014 20:37:34 GMT
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Post by purplebee on Jun 29, 2023 13:54:01 GMT
We sleep together, but we have a split king and we probably each have our own zip codes. Us too!
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paget
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,757
Jun 25, 2014 21:16:39 GMT
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Post by paget on Jun 29, 2023 14:02:24 GMT
We sleep separate. Dh snores very loudly and I’m a very light sleeper which is a bad combo. And if he’s not snoring he makes all kinds of weird breathing noises and “popping” sounds. When I worked from home as a SAHM and worked on our business I’d have to nap every afternoon because of the lack of sleep from sleeping with him. When I started working outside the home and having to get up early for my long commute I had to have my sleep and the separate rooms happened. It’s also nice because dh’s habit every night is to fall asleep in his chair and then go to bed when he wakes somewhere around 12-2am - so that would be another time I was woken up. We’ve been married 29 years and probably the reason is separate rooms the last 9 years so I can get enough sleep to deal with him during the day! Lol ❤️
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Jun 2, 2024 11:40:42 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2023 14:08:22 GMT
It would be tempting to have our own spaces, but I would never do that because it would really hurt my DH. I love sleeping in the same bed with him. My challenges are: He runs REALLY hot and with my hot flashes and his need to snuggle, it is SO uncomfortable! He is also a night person and I am a morning person. I have learned to deal with the TV on late (for the record I did NOT want a TV in our bedroom, but that is how he relaxes and falls asleep), but still struggle with my desire to get up "early" and his desire to keep me in bed an extra hour or two to snuggle. I'm not sure he would be able to sleep with out me being right next to him.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Jun 29, 2023 14:17:13 GMT
There was a time I would have seriously considered it due to DH's snoring but he did the sleep study and now he has a CPAP. He’s welcome in the bedroom again. That's funny, because we were talking the other day, and I wondered whether I had mild sleep apnea, and that I should go get a sleep study done. DSO said "If you have to get a CPAP machine, that's it, you're OUT!" Isn't the CPAP more annoying than the snoring? NO! OMG no. With my DH, it wasn’t the snoring exactly that was most disruptive. It was the fact that he would stop breathing for endless seconds only for his whole body to violently jerk in an effort to startle himself into breathing again. Over and over and over again all.freaking.night.long. 😵💫 I’d wake up exhausted every single day and it was hell. When the CPAP is seated correctly (he has the nasal pillow type of mask) it’s actually very quiet, just a repetitive soft whooshing sound that’s like white noise to me. Sometimes though the mask gets unseated just enough to let air escape and then it’s louder and somewhat annoying. If it wakes me up (which happens much less often than the snoring and apnea did) I usually just say quietly, “fix your mask,” he does, and all is well again. I’ll take the CPAP sounds over the snoring and sudden jerking any day of the week. To answer the question in the OP, that would be yes. If one of us is sick I’ll relocate to the guest room because it’s easier for me to pack up and move than it is for him with his CPAP. I spent a week in our guest room when DH had Covid and it was actually quite nice being able to have the blinds totally closed in the mornings, the fan on for white noise at night (but not blowing ON me) and I could read or look at my iPad in bed without annoying anyone else. He likes having the sun come in in the mornings and I hate it. It wouldn’t be so bad if the bed was reoriented so the light was just coming in the room vs. directly in my face but he says it’s too much of a bother to move things now. 🙄 I also hate how the A/C vent is directly above our bed and it blows freezing cold air on me at night, so I usually have a light blanket over me. Then I get *too* hot so I fling it back only to be frozen by the cold air coming out of that vent. Now I’m cold and clammy, ugh. Ironically enough, anytime he’s out of town DD jumps at the chance to sleep in my bed. I think she mostly doesn’t like being in her room alone because the big shedding dog can’t be in there and the little non shedder doesn’t like being in there (because that dog is my baby and has to be by me, LOL). I don’t really mind other than the fact that the child is like a barnacle attached to my side all night which forces me to the edge and displaces the little dog. I’m like, hey, you have alllllll this space over here on the other side to be in. Why ya gotta be all up on me like that? 🤣 🥵😫
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Post by peasapie on Jun 29, 2023 14:26:40 GMT
We sleep together as we both like to fall asleep to tv, like the same room temp, etc. but I don’t think sleeping together or apart signifies quality of relationship.
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StephDRebel
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,666
Location: Ohio
Jul 5, 2014 1:53:49 GMT
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Post by StephDRebel on Jun 29, 2023 14:42:09 GMT
We have our own rooms and if inhave any say we will never go back. I can't sleep if he is snoring his face off next to me.
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Post by essiejean on Jun 29, 2023 15:13:38 GMT
Since turning 60 my husband has had issues sleeping through the night so has migrated to the Queen bed in our spare bedroom. He slept there a few other times over the years (when I have had different surgeries) but only recently started sleeping there regularly. We don't know if it is the new mattress we just got for our room or not. Regardless, as long as he is getting a good nights sleep I don't care where he sleeps. Prior to my menopause issues I would have hated not having him next to me at night BUT with the constant battle I have nightly sleeping myself it seems to help not having a warm body next to me (we have a Queen) so as much as I hate to admit it having him sleep in the other room has improved my sleep as well.
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anniebeth24
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,566
Jun 26, 2014 14:12:17 GMT
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Post by anniebeth24 on Jun 29, 2023 15:26:00 GMT
Only if I fall asleep on the couch. He knows to never wake me when that happens because I am a nightmare when that happens! So glad to see that I'm not the only one! I am the crabbiest crab or even downright mean when I doze off and DH tries to wake me.
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Post by workingclassdog on Jun 29, 2023 16:09:03 GMT
I rarely sleep with my husband anymore.. he's never home.. he's usually out six weeks at a time, then we share. So I get the big king bed all to myself except when the MOOSE decides he wants to sleep with me. My 150 pound St. Bernard. That only usually lasts about 10 minutes before he is on to the next poor soul.
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RedSquirrelUK
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,748
Location: The UK's beautiful West Country
Aug 2, 2014 13:03:45 GMT
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Post by RedSquirrelUK on Jun 29, 2023 16:24:40 GMT
Same bed and only apart if one of us is ill, post-surgical, or radioactive.
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Post by wholarmor on Jun 29, 2023 16:34:52 GMT
DH & I did. He was a terrible snorer. He then got a CPAP machine but had terminal cancer and me getting up/getting ready for work would wake him up and on the flip side he was up late and I would go to bed early. So we decided separate rooms worked best for us. So sorry about his cancer.
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Post by marysue63 on Jun 29, 2023 16:42:47 GMT
I'm so surprised how many people said they sleep apart when one of them is sick. I've never even considered that! For me I want to be right next to the person in case they need anything (water, help to the bathroom, etc) and I want the same back if I'm sick. I just don't think I would sleep very well if I knew my husband was sick and I was in a different room, I would worry too much.
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Post by roundtwo on Jun 29, 2023 18:02:23 GMT
I'm so surprised how many people said they sleep apart when one of them is sick. I've never even considered that! For me I want to be right next to the person in case they need anything (water, help to the bathroom, etc) and I want the same back if I'm sick. I just don't think I would sleep very well if I knew my husband was sick and I was in a different room, I would worry too much. We are another couple that sleep apart when one is sick. I am a terrible nurse and dh knows that so he knows not to expect much from me, lol. Dh is pretty much the opposite and is a big worrier which I find too overbearing to have right next to me when I am sick. He did sleep in the spare room after my heart surgery because he was very worried about moving too much and bothering my incision. He has excellent hearing and sleeps with his door open so he would have heard if I had called him.
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The Birdhouse Lady
Drama Llama
Moose. It's what's for dinner.
Posts: 7,192
Location: Alaska -The Last Frontier
Jun 30, 2014 17:15:19 GMT
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Post by The Birdhouse Lady on Jun 29, 2023 18:11:45 GMT
I am a gypsy sleeper. I start off in bed w/ dh and end up in another bed or a couch.
I wake up for several reasons:
Noise (his snoring or the heating pipes)
I'm hot
I have heartburn
I have to pee
I hate our bed. We recently purchased a Sleep Number Bed. I like if FIRM he likes soft.
I also had fusion surgery and I can't sleep on anything that doesn't give me great support.
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Anita
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,647
Location: Kansas City -ish
Jun 27, 2014 2:38:58 GMT
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Post by Anita on Jun 29, 2023 18:36:59 GMT
I sleep better alone, but for some reason, sleeping in the same room together is a hill DH is willing to die on. So we do. At least he was willing to get a really comfortable split-king bed so we can have our separate levels of comfort.
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Post by Delta Dawn on Jun 29, 2023 19:19:20 GMT
Oh hell no! I married him so that I could sleep with him every night for the rest of my life. How on earth did you meet your husband? You have the perfect Pea marriage. Truly. What a sweet love story❤️
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Post by mellyw on Jun 29, 2023 19:22:37 GMT
We sleep together, but we have a split king and we probably each have our own zip codes. Pretty much describes us.
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TXMary
Pearl Clutcher
And so many nights I just dream of the ocean. God, I wish I was sailin' again.
Posts: 2,818
Jun 26, 2014 17:25:06 GMT
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Post by TXMary on Jun 29, 2023 19:46:07 GMT
There was a time I would have seriously considered it due to DH's snoring but he did the sleep study and now he has a CPAP. He’s welcome in the bedroom again. That's funny, because we were talking the other day, and I wondered whether I had mild sleep apnea, and that I should go get a sleep study done. DSO said "If you have to get a CPAP machine, that's it, you're OUT!" Isn't the CPAP more annoying than the snoring? Oh no...it's VERY quiet. In fact, when he first got it I couldn't sleep because it was suddenly so quiet in the room. I have adjusted.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Jun 29, 2023 19:57:22 GMT
I'm so surprised how many people said they sleep apart when one of them is sick. I've never even considered that! For me I want to be right next to the person in case they need anything (water, help to the bathroom, etc) and I want the same back if I'm sick. I just don't think I would sleep very well if I knew my husband was sick and I was in a different room, I would worry too much. For me, it’s because if he has something contagious I don’t want to get it myself and if I have something I don’t want him down with it too. There was one Christmas when we were all down with the flu at the same time and it was sheer misery. If you’re both sick and someone has to go to the pharmacy for something, who goes? BTDT and it sucks. If my DH is sick he’s a big boy and can take care of himself, he mostly wants to be left alone doesn’t want to be fawned over anyway. Besides, someone has to stay well to take care of our kid and pets. Post surgery is a little different story, but even then I think I prefer being left alone with the fewest distractions possible in the hope that I’d actually be able to sleep.
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Post by femalebusiness on Jun 29, 2023 20:02:39 GMT
Oh hell no! I married him so that I could sleep with him every night for the rest of my life. How on earth did you meet your husband? You have the perfect Pea marriage. Truly. What a sweet love story❤️ Thanks for that compliment. A friend of mine came to my house and told me that there were a bunch of guys hanging out at the pool at her apartments and I should go with her. I really did not want to go and she hassled me long enough that I gave in and went. Met him around noon and by that night we were in bed, my all time favorite place to be with him. I always tell him that I married him for his body. We have been together almost every day for over 50 years. When I was a kid I sat around listening to my mom and other married women and their lives seemed so sad to me. Not one of them seemed to be having any fun or excitement. I wanted a marriage that was fun, exciting and lots of great sex and it has been. We've at times lived on the wild side and have had so much fun and have been successful in our lives and raising our daughter. That man turned me on from the first moment that I met him. I adore him and he would say the same about me. He is exciting, a feminist, smart, handsome and he can do anything. There is absolutely nothing that he can't do. We don't disagree much at all on important things and have never had even one argument over money, sex or morals/ethics. I know I sound disingenuous but swear I get butterflies when he walks in a room. On the other hand I always say it's good that we hooked up because no one else would put up with either one of us.
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Post by chlerbie on Jun 29, 2023 20:08:33 GMT
We sleep together. We sleep in a full size bed as well. He generally ends up with an arm or leg over me, which is only a problem if I'm hot flashing at night. I don't sleep as well when we're apart, sleeping alone.
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