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Post by Pahina722 on Jul 6, 2015 15:36:12 GMT
is driving me nuts talking about it. Although I am an atheist, it generally doesn't bother me when people talk about church and religious activities. However, my hairdresser has gone off the deep end.
First, her son got an illness that she thought was being treated incorrectly, so she researched on the Internet and started going to a "wellness expert" whose degree is in traditional Chinese medicine. When I got my hair done right after she'd gone through that experience, I was treated to a 2 hour monologue on how doctors don't know what they are doing, this guy is weaning me from my Loritab addiction (whaaaaaaat?), and I should be taking all these enzymes. I gritted my teeth and bore with it since I like how she highlights my hair.
Last week, her spiel had degenerated even further and my appointment took 3 hours because she spent so much time waving her hands and testifying. In the 8 weeks between appointments, she'd taken a Dave Ramsey class and gone to the graduation ceremony for it at a fundamentalist church, where she apparently found religion. For 3 hours, I was regaled with stories of how God led her to the wellness expert, how God healed her of her addiction, how allergies shouldn't be treated, that schools are failing because God isn't in them any more, and that if science conflicts with (her interpretation of) the Bible, science is wrong. I'm a professor, so listening to this drivel is excruciating. Meanwhile, she changes my hair color completely and puts in almost no highlights.
So, how do I deal with this? Do I tell her why I'm leaving or do I just cancel my next appointment and never reschedule? She's about to lose 10 clients over this because several of my friends and family go to her and all are unhappy. I have been seeing her for about 8 years and never had any problems before.
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Post by gar on Jul 6, 2015 15:40:33 GMT
What a shame she can't separate her new found enthusiasm and her profession, especially when it's so overwhelming and therefore out of place. I would say that she deserves the chance to change her ways so I would try and politely tell her but I'm sure it'll fall on deaf ears and you'll have to find another hairdresser. Good luck!
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Post by fiddlesticks on Jul 6, 2015 15:42:19 GMT
I would just cancel and be done. If for some reason she reaches out to ask why, you can tell her. But chances are, she won't hear you.
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Deleted
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May 5, 2024 23:51:31 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 6, 2015 15:42:32 GMT
Does she work for herself or at a salon with a manager? If she has a manager I would talk to them about why she is losing clients. If she works for herself I'd just cancel and never make another appointment with her, you don't owe her an explanation.
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Post by scrapsotime on Jul 6, 2015 15:45:26 GMT
If she is the owner of her own place I would be telling her why I was leaving, if she worked for a salon I would be speaking to the owner. Let her know that you go to her for her professional services not her views on religion. I would also mention that your appointments are taking much longer and that is becoming a problem.
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Post by smalltowngirlie on Jul 6, 2015 15:52:08 GMT
Even as a Christian I would be avoiding her.  You had me at "wellness expert". I get that talk on a regular basis. |
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Nicole in TX
Pearl Clutcher
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Post by Nicole in TX on Jul 6, 2015 15:54:58 GMT
Since she is not listening to you and doing your haircolor incorrectly, I would just be done.
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Post by buckeyegirl on Jul 6, 2015 15:57:16 GMT
is driving me nuts talking about it. Although I am an atheist, it generally doesn't bother me when people talk about church and religious activities. However, my hairdresser has gone off the deep end. First, her son got an illness that she thought was being treated incorrectly, so she researched on the Internet and started going to a "wellness expert" whose degree is in traditional Chinese medicine. When I got my hair done right after she'd gone through that experience, I was treated to a 2 hour monologue on how doctors don't know what they are doing, this guy is weaning me from my Loritab addiction (whaaaaaaat?), and I should be taking all these enzymes. I gritted my teeth and bore with it since I like how she highlights my hair. Last week, her spiel had degenerated even further and my appointment took 3 hours because she spent so much time waving her hands and testifying. In the 8 weeks between appointments, she'd taken a Dave Ramsey class and gone to the graduation ceremony for it at a fundamentalist church, where she apparently found religion. For 3 hours, I was regaled with stories of how God led her to the wellness expert, how God healed her of her addiction, how allergies shouldn't be treated, that schools are failing because God isn't in them any more, and that if science conflicts with (her interpretation of) the Bible, science is wrong. I'm a professor, so listening to this drivel is excruciating. Meanwhile, she changes my hair color completely and puts in almost no highlights. So, how do I deal with this? Do I tell her why I'm leaving or do I just cancel my next appointment and never reschedule? She's about to lose 10 clients over this because several of my friends and family go to her and all are unhappy. I have been seeing her for about 8 years and never had any problems before. If you're not happy, I would just cancel and move on. No explanation necessary. I'm sure if she starts losing enough clients, she'll figure out why. Your bolded comment comes off to me as snooty and elitist. |
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PLurker
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Post by PLurker on Jul 6, 2015 15:59:40 GMT
It's like being on a diet. You know what the hardest part is? >>>>>>> Not Constantly talking about it!
You probably would do her a service by telling her why she is losing clients. If you are comfortable enough after all these years, you could tell her. Maybe it could be salvaged and you can continue your using her services, maybe not. But it might keep her from financial trouble. Of course it's not your job, and you can just cut loose and get a new stylist. It would depend on your relationship with her and how you feel.
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IAmUnoriginal
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Jun 25, 2014 23:27:45 GMT
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Post by IAmUnoriginal on Jul 6, 2015 16:00:14 GMT
I'd cancel and be done with it.
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NoWomanNoCry
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Post by NoWomanNoCry on Jul 6, 2015 16:02:25 GMT
I would cancel and just not go back and if she calls wanting a reason I would be honest and tell her.
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Post by Pahina722 on Jul 6, 2015 16:02:25 GMT
She rents space from the owner of a salon, so technically she is self-employed. I think what is troubling me about the whole thing is that previously I have really liked her and enjoyed (as much as possible when tinfoil is stuck in my hair) the appointments. It also concerns me that she mentioned several times that her husband isn't happy with her attachment to this church and wellness doctor and has complained about how much time she spends away from the family. It sounds as if her whole life is about to implode and she's just oblivious.
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akathy
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Jun 25, 2014 22:56:55 GMT
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Post by akathy on Jul 6, 2015 16:07:25 GMT
I would just cancel and be done. If for some reason she reaches out to ask why, you can tell her. But chances are, she won't hear you.  |
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conchita
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Post by conchita on Jul 6, 2015 16:11:11 GMT
I would definitely find a new stylist. I just did because the girl messed up my hair color and cut. That alone, is more than enough reason for me to move on. Add in unprofessional behavior and moving on isn't even a question. It's purely up to you if you want to tell her that her latest work wasn't up to her usual standards and that her proselytizing is unprofessional.
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Gravity
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Post by Gravity on Jul 6, 2015 16:11:18 GMT
I would also just cancel and be done. At this point, it seems like she isn't going to listen to anyone except her church. Your explanation would fall on deaf ears.
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Post by Pahina722 on Jul 6, 2015 16:12:21 GMT
If you're not happy, I would just cancel and move on. No explanation necessary. I'm sure if she starts losing enough clients, she'll figure out why. Your bolded comment comes off to me as snooty and elitist. As someone whose profession is higher education, I have great respect for those who've spent years educating and training to become doctors. If thinking that someone with a high school diploma is spouting drivel when she thinks she knows better than the medical community because she's done some internet searches makes me snooty and elitist, well, I will own that. I don't expect my doctor to know how to cut my hair and would think she was spouting drivel if she started trying to tell me what I was doing wrong with it, too. |
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Post by smalltowngirlie on Jul 6, 2015 16:42:10 GMT
As someone whose profession is higher education, I have great respect for those who've spent years educating and training to become doctors. If thinking that someone with a high school diploma is spouting drivel when she thinks she knows better than the medical community because she's done some internet searches makes me snooty and elitist, well, I will own that. I don't expect my doctor to know how to cut my hair and would think she was spouting drivel if she started trying to tell me what I was doing wrong with it, too. OK, this makes sense to me. I was a little put off by the comment also, but now I get it. I have a friend who says she will never go to a Dr. because they "know nothing and are just pushing drugs on you that will only make you sick". I pray her children never break a bone or a deep cut, not sure how her herbal remedies are going to heal that bone. |
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anniebygaslight
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Post by anniebygaslight on Jul 6, 2015 17:03:20 GMT
I had very similar some years ago. My hairdresser got sucked in by the Jehovah's Witnesses. She became a nuisance as she was forever giving me peurile pamphlets printed on the cheapest paper to read. For discussion at my next appointment. Yeah, right,
I changed hairdressers, as I couldn't be arsed with it.
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Post by flanz on Jul 6, 2015 17:08:00 GMT
She rents space from the owner of a salon, so technically she is self-employed. I think what is troubling me about the whole thing is that previously I have really liked her and enjoyed (as much as possible when tinfoil is stuck in my hair) the appointments. It also concerns me that she mentioned several times that her husband isn't happy with her attachment to this church and wellness doctor and has complained about how much time she spends away from the family. It sounds as if her whole life is about to implode and she's just oblivious. Since you have liked her as a person, in your shoes I would speak with her honestly about why you will not be returning. |
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MizIndependent
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Quit your bullpoop.
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Post by MizIndependent on Jul 6, 2015 17:12:10 GMT
If you really love how she does your hair (and a good hairdresser is worth her/his weight in gold), and you have a long standing relationship with her, then you might consider just being honest. When people find religion, they go through a euphoria stage, this is before they learn to respect other people's feelings/beliefs. Just tell kindly tell her that while you're happy she's found what she's found, you are not in the same place as she is and she is coming across quite strong. It would be a kindness to her to do so, because you know if you feel this way, a lot of her other customers are probably feeling this way too. She's likely to lose business unless she can learn when/where people are receptive to what she's experienced as opposed to shoving her experience down reluctant throats. KWIM?  |
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valleyview
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Post by valleyview on Jul 6, 2015 17:26:56 GMT
I think she lost my business at lortab addiction. Good luck finding a new stylist!
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Jul 6, 2015 17:31:43 GMT
I agree with those who say they might try talking with her first before trying to find a new stylist.
But personally, I would avoid giving any specific feedback about her new-found religion -- that I would deal with by simply saying I do not share her beliefs and prefer my time at the hairdressers to be free of such topics (i.e., a sort of "this is my time; I like to keep it light" approach).
I would definitely stress that the quality of the appointments has been declining. Be very specific about the poor coloring result and the increased amount of time that the appointment took. Those are specific measurable outcomes that give both of you some way to gauge whether she is meeting your needs or not.
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Post by Dori~Mama~Bear on Jul 6, 2015 18:06:16 GMT
Not good... When I went to Beauty School in 1983 The first thing they told my class was things to talk about and things to not talk about with clients. The top 3 subjects to never discuss is 1. Religion 2. politics 3. personal issues. You can talk about your family if it is positive but don't talk about personal issues if they are related to bad issues.
My daughter and I was having our hair done last week she was getting her blue and purple removed and her natural color back in and as I was sitting there waiting for her to have the color applied I was sitting in our hairstylists chair and the stylist next to her was doing this older ladies hair and she was talking about her kids dad that was remarried and the new wife hates her and the kid (15 or 16) gets treated like crap by the new wife and that the kid and a friend is going to dads house for 6 weeks and that the stylist was mad because the new wife. this kind of thing is not a good subject. I wanted to open my mouth and tell her to talk about something else.
I stood behind that rule and when a client wanted to talk about any of them I just listened and smiled. I never brought up any of the subjects.
I am sorry you have to deal with it. You could always politely tell her that you prefer not to discuss religion while getting your hair done.
The other thing I noticed is most of the stylists were wearing tank tops (with spaghetti straps and flip flops) when I went to school. The state safety and sanitation rules were you had to wear sleeves and closed toed shoes. I wonder if they changed that or if these people just wear what they want and don't care about the rules.
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scrappinmama
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Post by scrappinmama on Jul 6, 2015 18:06:12 GMT
If you like how she cuts hair, why not just tell her to cut the religious chatter? Tell her that you like how she styles your hair, but you prefer not to discuss religion.
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Post by PolarGreen12 on Jul 6, 2015 18:20:00 GMT
I feel your pain Pahina. My Mother and I attend Weight Watchers together. Some recently new ladies are rather firm in their beliefs and any commentary from them relates to God. At the meeting last week one asked to lead us in prayer. That was it for me, going to have to try and talk to the meeting leader about it. In a non bitchy way of course.
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Post by Florida Cindy on Jul 6, 2015 18:24:12 GMT
I'd tell her you do not want to talk about religion or wellness. Then, I'd warn her if she does it, you will be forced to find another hairdresser. Does she work in a salon with other people? I'd also speak to the salon owner/manager about it as
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Post by Florida Cindy on Jul 6, 2015 18:27:20 GMT
It also concerns me that she mentioned several times that her husband isn't happy with her attachment to this church and wellness doctor and has complained about how much time she spends away from the family. It sounds as if her whole life is about to implode and she's just oblivious. The situation between your stylist and her husband are their business. I'd tell her you don't want to hear about it. I am thankful for my stylist. She's a doll. |
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Rhondito
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MississipPea
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Post by Rhondito on Jul 6, 2015 18:43:11 GMT
Gah... that would be torture for me.
I have an Aunt who is like that - she can't have a conversation without talking about God or religion. Not one sentence. At all.
Could you bring a book or put in earbuds?
I've been going to the same girl for almost 20 years and she's awesome. She tells me that she loves to see my name in her appointment book because she knows I don't mind if she's quiet and doesn't talk. LOL
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Post by Pahina722 on Jul 6, 2015 19:11:40 GMT
Thanks for the input, Refupeas. DH and DS both have already decided that they are done, so it would be uncomfortable for me to keep going after they stop. ( Why do I feel guilty for not giving my business to someone whose service has been declining?) I think that I will call the salon owner to let her know. She and my hairdresser have been friends and colleagues for years, so perhaps it would carry more weight coming from her.
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Post by JustCallMeMommy on Jul 6, 2015 19:16:40 GMT
I would cancel and not reschedule. I did that with a hairdresser once after the sale pitch every single visit got to be too much. He was a really great stylist, but it didn't make me feel great about myself to have him suggesting waxing and manicures and facials when I just wanted to leave with great hair.
I think in your case, the deal breaker would be that she is taking longer and not doing a great job. Even if I could put up with the chatter, my time is valuable.
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You had me at "wellness expert". I get that talk on a regular basis. 
Time to get off the internet!
