zookeeper
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,909 
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Post by zookeeper on Jul 30, 2016 19:17:10 GMT
My son is 19 years. He is a server at a popular movie grille where they take your food orders and serve you at your seats. They also have a full bar and serve drinks in the theater.
Every time a movie comes out like Bad Moms where it is going to a girls night out event...my son and other young men get verbally harassed with sexual innuendoes. Women get drunk and get bold and then say things like "I'd like to suck you dry" and "Oh look, one in every flavor".
The management does not see this as an issue. But what if it were a group of men making sexual remarks towards a female employee?
My son and his male co-workers are extremely uncomfortable with the behavior of these women. The women travel in packs and feed off of each other's boldness and become very much out of line and inappropriate.
I asked my son why a member of management did not hang out in the back of the theater and keep this behavior in line. His response that in the interest of customer service pretty much anything goes. Does it really? Good customer service dictates that your order is taken correctly and politely and that your food is served in a timely manner with a smile on your server's face. It does not dictate that you be allowed to verbally harass young men. It would never be allowed for young women, why is it acceptable for young men?
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Post by hop2 on Jul 30, 2016 19:18:50 GMT
Wow!!
How awful. And yes management should have a problem with it!!!!
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tiffanytwisted
Pearl Clutcher
you can check out any time you like, but you can never leave
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Post by tiffanytwisted on Jul 30, 2016 19:22:11 GMT
Wow. That's just wrong. I'd slap some bitch silly if I ever heard that said to my son.
And you're exactly right - what the hell is wrong w/the management? They'd have a lawsuit on their hands (as they should) if they ever allowed a female employee to be spoken to that way. Why is it different for the male employees?
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 19, 2024 10:35:20 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 30, 2016 19:23:54 GMT
They should have a zero tolerance policy against harassment from anybody.
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inkedup
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Jun 26, 2014 5:00:26 GMT
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Post by inkedup on Jul 30, 2016 19:24:54 GMT
"I'd like to suck you dry?"
Okay. I'm clutching my pearls at that one.
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Post by chaosisapony on Jul 30, 2016 19:27:09 GMT
I've witnessed exactly the type of behavior you're talking about. For some reason, anymore it's acceptable if it comes from women and is directed towards men. Everyone is just supposed to laugh and take it in good spirits. I find it down right weird and I would hope that management would back up employees that are being harassed regardless of their gender.
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Post by freecharlie on Jul 30, 2016 19:27:43 GMT
Eww
It is jot okay for women to do it just as it isn't okay for me.
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zookeeper
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,909
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Post by zookeeper on Jul 30, 2016 19:29:17 GMT
Okay. I'm clutching my pearls at that one. I am no prude, but it is not appropriate to say out loud to a young man who is trying to do his job. |
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 19, 2024 10:35:20 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 30, 2016 19:34:00 GMT
"I'd like to suck you dry?" Okay. I'm clutching my pearls at that one. Me too! Holy crap. I guess I live a sheltered life but I'm stunned to hear that this happens to your son ALL THE TIME! I would like to think that it's the very rare exception that a woman would talk like that! SaveSave |
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zookeeper
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,909
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Post by zookeeper on Jul 30, 2016 19:36:52 GMT
It happens at movies that are geared towards girls night outs...not every movie. I am ready to go buy a ticket to see Bad Mom's today and sit in the back of the theater and beat any woman who talks like that to my son or his friends.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 19, 2024 10:35:20 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 30, 2016 19:39:13 GMT
It happens at movies that are geared towards girls night outs...not every movie. I am ready to go buy a ticket to see Bad Mom's today and sit in the back of the theater and beat any woman who talks like that to my son or his friends. I wish I lived near you, I'd help! Plus, I've never been to a theater like that, sounds fun  SaveSave |
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paget
Drama Llama
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Jun 25, 2014 21:16:39 GMT
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Post by paget on Jul 30, 2016 20:01:29 GMT
That is horrifying. And disgusting on the part of management. Out of Curiosity, what does management suggest your son and others do - ignore it?
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Post by hop2 on Jul 30, 2016 20:04:09 GMT
Like I'm thinking about it and getting pea lived for your DS! Seriously unacceptable behavior. Only place it might be acceptable us a strip club. Because a strip club or is selling sexual Innuendo so one could expect it there. Definitely NOT a movie theater.
Holy hell call in sick if they play any magic mike movies!!! Because even if it's the topic of the movie still not acceptable in a theater
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Post by anonrefugee on Jul 30, 2016 20:46:19 GMT
I can grab my pearls and rant about this for hours. I don't know when women thought they gained anything by acting like crass men, but it's a trend.
If you had a daughter it would be a lawsuit, or at least PR nightmare, waiting to happen!
I feel bad for your son. And bad for society. Do they not have sons? Are they teaching this garbage to their daughters?
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Post by hop2 on Jul 30, 2016 20:52:28 GMT
"I'd like to suck you dry?" Okay. I'm clutching my pearls at that one. I'm beyond clutching my pearls, I'm at clutching my broom to whack the crap out of 'woman' who would say that to a 19 yo.! And looking up lawyer numbers on my cel phone while doing it! Not that age matters and no one should be treated that way at their job, but damn. To me 19 yo is still a boy and I can not imagine allowing anyone to treat my DS like that ( god I hope he eventual spouse will spare me hearing stuff like that ) |
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Post by LiLi on Jul 30, 2016 20:54:42 GMT
gross.
He should report the management team for allowing sexual harassment in their establishment.
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Anita
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Posts: 5,646
Location: Kansas City -ish
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Post by Anita on Jul 30, 2016 21:03:24 GMT
That is just disgusting. I'm sorry they have to put up with that and that management will do nothing.  |
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ginacivey
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refupea #2 in southeast missouri
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Post by ginacivey on Jul 30, 2016 21:03:55 GMT
Wow. That's just wrong. I'd slap some bitch silly if I ever heard that said to my son.
And you're exactly right - what the hell is wrong w/the management? They'd have a lawsuit on their hands (as they should) if they ever allowed a female employee to be spoken to that way. Why is it different for the male employees?
i'd slap a bitch silly for saying it to anyone's son you can tell a kid is 19 years old - people can be really stupid sometimes those things aren't appropriate to say to virtually anyone.... gina |
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Post by femalebusiness on Jul 30, 2016 21:05:11 GMT
Have you ever seen women in a joint with stripping men? The women for the most part make asses out of themselves. If you go into a strip club with women stripping the men for the most part are quiet and respectful and just sit there and look.
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Post by hop2 on Jul 30, 2016 21:07:38 GMT
Have you ever seen women in a joint with stripping men? The women for the most part make asses out of themselves. If you go into a strip club with women stripping the men for the most part are quiet and respectful and just sit there and look. no I haven't, pretty much because the above is what I expect and I'm not comfortable with that at all. I'm a prude that way. Makes me ill. |
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Post by msdintz on Jul 30, 2016 21:32:06 GMT
That is disgusting and sexual harassment in the workplace is illegal. I have a 17 yo son and would not stand for that. Some women lose all control in a group. It's embarrassing and they should be called on it. Every time.
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Post by anonrefugee on Jul 30, 2016 21:35:06 GMT
Once agin I wish we lived close enough to deal with this in person!
I've got teen sons and get steamed the more I think about.
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Post by mom on Jul 30, 2016 22:20:42 GMT
This is wrong, on so many levels.
If I were with people behaving like that I would leave in a heartbeat.
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oldcrow
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Post by oldcrow on Jul 30, 2016 22:32:25 GMT
If your child was female and management refused to do anything about the situation what would be your next step?
Take that next step because the sex/age of the worker doesn't matter. Sexual harassment is sexual harassment.
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zookeeper
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,909
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Post by zookeeper on Jul 30, 2016 22:54:10 GMT
I am writing an email to the general manager of the theater. My son does not want me to move into what he calls my "Mother Bear" mode, but I think that in this situation that I really have to. He thinks that this is just one of those things that he has to tolerate in the name of customer service and he is not one to ruffle feathers. However, I am definitely one to ruffle feathers so it is a good thing that he has me for a mother.
I am not typically a helicopter parent, but this is too big a concern to just let it go.
Thanks everybody for validating my concerns.
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FurryP
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To pea or not to pea...
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Jun 26, 2014 19:58:26 GMT
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Post by FurryP on Jul 30, 2016 22:58:06 GMT
Those women should get kicked out of the theater if they can't control themselves. Period. No warnings. Just kicked out.
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supascrappa
Shy Member
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Post by supascrappa on Jul 30, 2016 22:58:31 GMT
could you address this with managment as a "concerned viewer" before being Mama Bear? Like you witnessed some inappropriate stuff happening while you were a movie goer?
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FurryP
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To pea or not to pea...
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Jun 26, 2014 19:58:26 GMT
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Post by FurryP on Jul 30, 2016 22:59:36 GMT
I am writing an email to the general manager of the theater. My son does not want me to move into what he calls my "Mother Bear" mode, but I think that in this situation that I really have to. He thinks that this is just one of those things that he has to tolerate in the name of customer service and he is not one to ruffle feathers. However, I am definitely one to ruffle feathers so it is a good thing that he has me for a mother. I am not typically a helicopter parent, but this is too big a concern to just let it go. Thanks everybody for validating my concerns. How about if you emailed not as his mother, but you said you were a customer there and witnessed it? For his sake. Save |
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smginaz Suzy
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Jun 26, 2014 17:27:30 GMT
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Post by smginaz Suzy on Jul 30, 2016 23:10:51 GMT
What is happening with your son is all kinds of wrong, but you are mistaken if you believe that this behavior does not happen to women who work in hospitality/service. Yes, every once in a while you see action taken to address it or a lawsuit, but it is still egregious, frequent, and in many cases, met with the same response that your son was provided: suck it up, buttercup, deliver good customer service, and remember that a little flirting increases checks and tips. I'm equally horrified for men and women who think they need to put up with bad behavior by customers as a part of their job.
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Post by 950nancy on Jul 30, 2016 23:23:27 GMT
I think these women have confused a strip club with a movie theater. They must think that men want to be sexualized and appreciate the advances.
I have two young men who have looked older than their age for several years. Facial hair and height have added to the confusion. Ever since elementary school, I have seen predatory behaviors from the female species. Most of the time it just made me shake my head and kind of laugh when moms post how bad boys are. Girls are too. We often go on Caribbean vacations and on several trips have had cougars go after the boys from the time they were 15. My sons have just kind of laughed it off, but ewww. I think alcohol and any libido don't always mix. If he doesn't want you to do anything, I would respect that, but maybe give him some tools to deal with it. Perhaps start with fake wedding ring.
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