freebird
Drama Llama
'cause I'm free as a bird now
Posts: 6,927 
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Post by freebird on Nov 9, 2017 3:35:47 GMT
Are you married to a person that you can have an entire conversation with them, and then days later they have no clue what you're talking about? I make this face at least once a day with him:  Told him about an art project I wanted to do. Talked about it at length. Tonight, 15 feet away I created almost the entire project within earshot. Not only did he have no clue I was making this huge project around the corner (making all kinds of noise), but he had no idea what I was going to do with it when it was done. The thing is, the project was going to involve HIM. dude. We talked about it, like, Monday. *head desk* |
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Post by dewryce on Nov 9, 2017 3:37:40 GMT
You mean they make a different model?
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Post by freecharlie on Nov 9, 2017 3:41:22 GMT
I definitely want to bang my head at times. There are times I tune him out as well, but not as often.
What are you making?
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freebird
Drama Llama
'cause I'm free as a bird now
Posts: 6,927
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Post by freebird on Nov 9, 2017 3:41:50 GMT
I definitely want to bang my head at times. There are times I tune him out as well, but not as often. What are you making? I'm painting a wedding dress for a photo shoot. |
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garcia5050
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,734
Location: So. Calif.
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Post by garcia5050 on Nov 9, 2017 3:43:20 GMT
Before I got married, I told my future husband that I probably wouldn't be having kids. He later said he didn't remember that conversation at all. That's a huge thing to not remember.
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LeaP
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,939
Location: Los Angeles, CA where 405 meets 101
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Post by LeaP on Nov 9, 2017 3:43:49 GMT
Mine has male pattern **blindness**. He opens the fridge/closet/cabinet and says, "Honey, where is the...?"
Yeah, the milk is on the shelf, 12" from the refrigerator door where it is also commonly found.
I feel your pain.
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Post by dewryce on Nov 9, 2017 3:51:29 GMT
Before I got married, I told my future husband that I probably wouldn't be having kids. He later said he didn't remember that conversation at all. That's a huge thing to not remember.  Yeah, that's kind of a big one! |
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freebird
Drama Llama
'cause I'm free as a bird now
Posts: 6,927
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Post by freebird on Nov 9, 2017 3:53:26 GMT
Mine has male pattern **blindness**. He opens the fridge/closet/cabinet and says, "Honey, where is the...?" Yeah, the milk is on the shelf, 12" from the refrigerator door where it is also commonly found. I feel your pain. This is why I have a freezer on the bottom! "where's the mustard?" "well, if you bend at the waist you can see it on the middle shelf" |
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Mystie
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,299
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Post by Mystie on Nov 9, 2017 3:55:30 GMT
I'm increasingly convinced that when I talk, most of the time all my husband hears is "wawawa" like Charlie's Brown's teacher in the old Peanuts cartoons.
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IAmUnoriginal
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,894
Jun 25, 2014 23:27:45 GMT
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Post by IAmUnoriginal on Nov 9, 2017 3:56:35 GMT
At home and at work. At home, he swears I never said any such thing and the conversation didn’t happen. Meanwhile, I can tell you what he was wearing, where we were and the time of day when we had the talk. At work, my boss openly admits that he will have entire conversations and if it isn’t important to him at the time, the slate is wiped clean when the conversation is over. He’s the same work and home. Drives his wife to the edge, too.
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PrettyInPeank
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,691
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Post by PrettyInPeank on Nov 9, 2017 3:58:09 GMT
Male pattern blindness lmao 😂
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Post by Eddie-n-Harley on Nov 9, 2017 3:59:55 GMT
Mine has male pattern **blindness**. He opens the fridge/closet/cabinet and says, "Honey, where is the...?" Yeah, the milk is on the shelf, 12" from the refrigerator door where it is also commonly found. I feel your pain. That's legitimately a thing. Science says so. The problem in our house, I think, is mostly a matter of selective listening, in that the reason one of us often "forgets" what the other has said is because we're not listening, so the conversation never fully registers. |
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Post by crazy4scraps on Nov 9, 2017 4:07:21 GMT
Yup. At least once every two weeks. I can’t tell if he needs his hearing checked or his memory. Or both! One or the other is clearly faulty! The most recent memorable one was my most recent post op doctor appointment and I needed x-rays. I made the appointment for a typically light day of the week and earlier in the day so it would be the least disruptive to his schedule to take me. My neighbor had driven me to the previous two appointments and I was getting sick of asking her because taking me to the doctor shouldn’t be her problem. Plus it’s just awkward. I told him the day I made the appointment (texted him too), it was two weeks out. Told him again the week before. Told him again three days before. Told him again the day before, at which point he told me that I needed to give him more notice about these things and that it was the first he was hearing about it!    Seriously dude? Are you kidding me? I told you about this appointment FOUR FREAKING TIMES. Four times. Drives. Me. In. Sane. |
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Post by monklady123 on Nov 9, 2017 4:07:31 GMT
I have learned over the years -- 28 to be exact -- that I cannot have any kind of conversation with my dh if he's doing anything else.
I, being a woman, can of course do that, but he is hopeless. So if he's reading the paper in the morning, nope. If he's watching TV, nope. If he's looking at his phone, definitely nope. My best hope is to say "can I talk or are you listening/reading/whatever-ing?" lol.
His mother was the kind who would talk non-stop in a monotone kind of voice -- like Mystie said, it's like the "wawawa" from Charlie Brown -- so I've always attributed it to that. He tunes out if talking goes on too long. It's one thing that makes him an excellent facilitator of meetings though...he won't let people talk for the sake of talking. lol.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Nov 9, 2017 4:11:26 GMT
At home and at work. At home, he swears I never said any such thing and the conversation didn’t happen. Meanwhile, I can tell you what he was wearing, where we were and the time of day when we had the talk. At work, my boss openly admits that he will have entire conversations and if it isn’t important to him at the time, the slate is wiped clean when the conversation is over. He’s the same work and home. Drives his wife to the edge, too. YES! This exactly! Our conversation, which he is actively participating in while it’s happening, is wiped completely clean like someone shook his brain like an Etch-a-Sketch, and POOF! It’s just GONE. There are times when I’m tempted to record the conversation with the voice memo thing on my phone just so I can play it back later and say, “Remember it NOW?”  |
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Post by papersilly on Nov 9, 2017 5:10:49 GMT
I am that spouse. Makes DH nuts.
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Post by femalebusiness on Nov 9, 2017 5:13:14 GMT
When I was teaching my daughter to talk I used to tell her, look at my face. Now watch my mouth. I do the same thing to my husband almost daily and he is an old man.  |
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Nov 9, 2017 5:28:59 GMT
I am that spouse. Makes DH nuts. Yeah. I’d probably have to admit that my husband would have that complaint about me more readily than I would about him. |
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Post by AussieMeg on Nov 9, 2017 5:35:20 GMT
Absolutely.
Constantly.
I now only communicate with DSO via text so there is a record of everything I've told him.
(I'm only half joking - I don't only communicate via text, but I certainly text everything I need him to remember.)
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perumbula
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,439
Location: Idaho
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Post by perumbula on Nov 9, 2017 5:47:10 GMT
I've decided that it's like when he's grocery shopping. When he grocery shops, he single-minded and will go down the list not looking for or seeing anything else. When we have a conversation he's only listening for the thing he's looking to hear. Any other information is extraneous and will not be retained. It makes it hard to give him new information that he's not expecting to hear.
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anniebygaslight
Drama Llama
I'd love a cup of tea. #1966
Posts: 7,394
Location: Third Rock from the sun.
Jun 28, 2014 14:08:19 GMT
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Post by anniebygaslight on Nov 9, 2017 7:38:44 GMT
Yep. Selective memory and selective deafness. Both are carried on the Y chromosome.
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Post by phoenixcov on Nov 9, 2017 8:33:07 GMT
Sometimes my life feels like one of the old black and white films where the man is quietly driving the wife insane.  Nobody else realises what he is doing though. (In the film that is). |
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tuesdaysgone
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,832
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Post by tuesdaysgone on Nov 9, 2017 10:35:40 GMT
Should you need a final score from the Atlanta Braves v Pittsburgh Pirates game from 1983, my husband can tell you immediately. If you ask about something I discussed with him last night, probably not.
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used2scrap
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,036
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Post by used2scrap on Nov 9, 2017 11:14:09 GMT
Mine has male pattern **blindness**. He opens the fridge/closet/cabinet and says, "Honey, where is the...?" Yeah, the milk is on the shelf, 12" from the refrigerator door where it is also commonly found. I feel your pain. All 3 of the males in this house have that affliction! |
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teddyw
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,867
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Post by teddyw on Nov 9, 2017 11:46:34 GMT
Yes and after at least 3 conversations as to why I didn’t want to host my in-laws for thanksgiving due to our kitchen reno and my mom being ill, what does he do? Invites them.
He does it all the time. It gets worse with age. I really fear retirement.
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Post by Merge on Nov 9, 2017 11:53:08 GMT
Absolutely. Constantly. I now only communicate with DSO via text so there is a record of everything I've told him. (I'm only half joking - I don't only communicate via text, but I certainly text everything I need him to remember.) I do the same thing with DH. He gets texts and calendar invites for events, because otherwise, it's like the conversation never happened. |
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Post by lisae on Nov 9, 2017 12:38:53 GMT
Mine forgets the things HE asks me about!
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rickmer
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,125
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Post by rickmer on Nov 9, 2017 12:50:55 GMT
we can be alone in a room and i am talking away... he says "oh, were you talking to me? you should have said my name when you started so i knew you were talking to me". umm...who else would i be speaking to? there is no one here? i will also bring up something about plans made, he will say "no, that is not what is happening". i get confused, i remember the entire conversation?! turns out, AFTER our conversation, something altered plans but he neglected to share. somehow i was expected to know the stuff he forgets to tell me. i need a crystal ball. |
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Post by mrsscrapdiva on Nov 9, 2017 13:00:08 GMT
all.the.time it drives me nuts.  |
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Post by lisacharlotte on Nov 9, 2017 13:05:21 GMT
I'm that spouse. He does have selective blindness however.
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Yeah, that's kind of a big one!
