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Post by anxiousmom on Nov 12, 2014 15:11:23 GMT
Just curious...
But when you have overwhelming issues (family, money, whatever) are you a sharer? or are you a silent sufferer? We talk about sudden, unbelievable divorces, or surprising financial revelations of friends, which leads to me to think a lot of people suffer their ills alone.
What are you?
(for the record I am a keep my mouth shut kind of girl.)
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peabay
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,975
Jun 25, 2014 19:50:41 GMT
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Post by peabay on Nov 12, 2014 15:11:46 GMT
Silent sufferer.
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Post by anxiousmom on Nov 12, 2014 15:13:51 GMT
I wonder why some of us are that way? I would rather gouge my eyes out with a rusty grapefruit spoon than talk about things like money...but others have no problems. |
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Post by gar on Nov 12, 2014 15:13:58 GMT
On the whole I silent sufferer although it does depend somewhat.
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Post by gar on Nov 12, 2014 15:14:21 GMT
I wonder why some of us are that way? I would rather gouge my eyes out with a rusty grapefruit spoon than talk about things like money...but others have no problems. Pride? |
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wellway
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,203
Jun 25, 2014 20:50:09 GMT
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Post by wellway on Nov 12, 2014 15:15:06 GMT
Silent sufferer but friends tell me stuff. They know I don't gossip.
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peabay
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,975
Jun 25, 2014 19:50:41 GMT
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Post by peabay on Nov 12, 2014 15:15:07 GMT
I wonder why some of us are that way? I would rather gouge my eyes out with a rusty grapefruit spoon than talk about things like money...but others have no problems. I just don't want to bother people. And I don't want people in my business. If you share with them, they know stuff about you and I don't need someone either 1. sharing it with someone else or 2. asking me about it every chance they get. |
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loco coco
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,662 
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Post by loco coco on Nov 12, 2014 15:16:41 GMT
the only people I share with are my mom and my husband. Even my good friends may not what bad things are going on in my life. Oh, and I share online, its easier to open up here than in real life sometimes  |
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wellway
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,203
Jun 25, 2014 20:50:09 GMT
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Post by wellway on Nov 12, 2014 15:17:57 GMT
What's that saying? when you have problems, 80% don't care and 20% are glad. Very cynical I know.
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Post by anxiousmom on Nov 12, 2014 15:18:09 GMT
I wonder why some of us are that way? I would rather gouge my eyes out with a rusty grapefruit spoon than talk about things like money...but others have no problems. Pride? Maybe...it's a good thing to think about. |
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Post by Fidget on Nov 12, 2014 15:19:04 GMT
Silent sufferer, I don't even share my worries with DH, I am a big time worrier, don't know why but I worry about everything....
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Post by LAM88 on Nov 12, 2014 15:20:52 GMT
Definitely a silent sufferer. Even my DH would be surprised at some of the personal demons I wrestle with. Probably not the healthiest way to be but it is who I am.
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Post by threegirls on Nov 12, 2014 15:21:59 GMT
I am a silent sufferer via my genes. I come from a long line of family members who suffer in silence.
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garcia5050
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,815
Location: So. Calif.
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Post by garcia5050 on Nov 12, 2014 15:23:58 GMT
Silent sufferer. I truly believe no one cares about my issues as much as I do. Why burden someone else? And peabay also had some good points.
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grinningcat
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,663
Jun 26, 2014 13:06:35 GMT
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Post by grinningcat on Nov 12, 2014 15:24:44 GMT
It depends. For the vast majority, there is no way in hell I will tell you my troubles. There are only two people in the world I can talk to about anything and everything without having those issues being used against me in the future. Quite frankly, most people don't give a rat's ass about my (or anyone else's problems) and the rest just want to use the information against you. So unless I trust you, there's no way in hell I'm going to talk about my problems with you. And quite frankly, I don't trust most people with that sort of thing.
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akathy
What's For Dinner?
Still peaing from Podunk!
Posts: 4,546
Location: North Dakota
Jun 25, 2014 22:56:55 GMT
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Post by akathy on Nov 12, 2014 15:25:43 GMT
I suffer in silence and let it simmer for a long time until I just spew it But of course that depends on what it is. Some things I'll never tell no matter what. Just not my style. |
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Post by auntkelly on Nov 12, 2014 15:27:35 GMT
I open up to my closest friends and share my problems. It really helps me cope when I share with good friends who I truly feel have my best interest at heart. I'm pretty discreet about which friends I share with, but most of my close friends have been friends for 20+ years, and they have never betrayed my confidences. I truly feel like I could tell my best friend anything and she would take it to the grave with her.
I don't talk about finances or intimate marital matters with anyone but my husband, because I really feel like those are areas that should be kept private as long as there are no serious problems.
I'm pretty careful about what I share over the internet. I don't share anything that I'm not willing to shout from the mountaintop, because I don't think there is any true privacy when it comes to the internet.
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Post by lisacharlotte on Nov 12, 2014 15:28:54 GMT
depends on the issue. I'm less a silent sufferer as I age. mostly because I no longer really care what people think of me. it's liberating to some extent and I think of all the time wasted in my youth worrying about what people thought of me.
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ginger
Shy Member
Posts: 34
Sept 20, 2014 15:19:42 GMT
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Post by ginger on Nov 12, 2014 15:31:09 GMT
Silent. I don't like a lot of attention, negative or positive, and once people know things they tend to ask questions about it too much for me. Im a huge introvert anyway and like to deal with things my way which isnt the way many people deal I've discovered.
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J u l e e
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,531
Location: Cincinnati
Jun 28, 2014 2:50:47 GMT
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Post by J u l e e on Nov 12, 2014 15:33:59 GMT
I just don't want to bother people. And I don't want people in my business. If you share with them, they know stuff about you and I don't need someone either 1. sharing it with someone else or 2. asking me about it every chance they get. My soul sister. I especially hate to be asked about my stuff all the time. I don't even really think about it as suffering in silence though. I'm just not a sharer. And I don't want to be. So it doesn't bother me to keep my stuff to myself. It kind of sounds really negative, but I promise, I'm good!  I'm also an excellent listener, because I don't feel the need to jump in and match someone's story with one of my own. |
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Aug 18, 2025 19:46:43 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Nov 12, 2014 15:45:16 GMT
I wonder why some of us are that way? I would rather gouge my eyes out with a rusty grapefruit spoon than talk about things like money...but others have no problems. I just don't want to bother people. And I don't want people in my business. If you share with them, they know stuff about you and I don't need someone either 1. sharing it with someone else or 2. asking me about it every chance they get.  |
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Post by lucyg on Nov 12, 2014 15:53:17 GMT
I opened this thread ready to say, "What is this silent suffering of which you speak?" I do make everyone around me listen to all my complaints. Sometimes over and over again.  But now I see you're talking about actual personal, private stuff. Um. Never mind. Definitely silent sufferer.  |
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angie w
Full Member
Posts: 107
Jun 26, 2014 2:35:35 GMT
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Post by angie w on Nov 12, 2014 16:00:11 GMT
slight hijack - lucyg your new photo is pretty! - hijack over
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kelly8875
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,448
Location: Lost in my supplies...
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Post by kelly8875 on Nov 12, 2014 16:00:25 GMT
Silent sufferer here...
I guess I figure sometimes that people don't care, why would they want to listen. I don't want to come across as a whiner. But I would absolutely listen and be there for anyone else that needs me.
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Post by bc2ca on Nov 12, 2014 16:02:37 GMT
I suffer in silence and let it simmer for a long time until I just spew it But of course that depends on what it is. Some things I'll never tell no matter what. Just not my style. I've gotten better at not letting something simmer until I explode, but it is mostly DH I share with. |
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Post by JustCallMeMommy on Nov 12, 2014 16:03:17 GMT
I pretty much keep troubles to myself. This worked against me when I was divorcing - it was hard to just blurt out personal stuff when no one knew it was coming. I knew it was coming for probably 5 months before I told anyone.
ETA: <-- And with that post, I became Nice as Pi.
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Post by Laura in OK on Nov 12, 2014 16:03:21 GMT
Another silent sufferer here!
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Aug 18, 2025 19:46:43 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Nov 12, 2014 16:04:02 GMT
Silent sufferer, although I will share with my DH, I would never share with anyone else.
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Post by sincity2003 on Nov 12, 2014 16:05:57 GMT
I've always been a silent sufferer. I don't talk about my marriage or finances to anyone. I've occasionally shared some things with my sister, but only in response to things she has been going through (she is 9 years younger than me and has a 1 year old, so she's recently asked me some things about my marriage when DS was that age). When DS was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes in January of 2013, I opened up to more people than I should have and learned a tough lesson. They used it against him in certain situations that were important to him. Now, unless someone specifically asks me a question (or says something so outrageously wrong or stupid), I just don't talk about it.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Aug 18, 2025 19:46:43 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Nov 12, 2014 16:07:57 GMT
Used to be (and sometimes still am) a sharer. I've come to realize people don't care because they are too busy with their own lives.
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