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Post by iamkristinl16 on Jul 9, 2021 11:54:20 GMT
No. But I wouldn’t say that I really have a best friend at all.
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carhoch
Pearl Clutcher
Be yourself everybody else is already taken
Posts: 2,995
Location: We’re RV’s so It change all the time .
Jun 28, 2014 21:46:39 GMT
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Post by carhoch on Jul 9, 2021 11:59:33 GMT
My husband is my everything and that includes the title of best friend but I still want to strangle him once in a while We are together 39 years married 35 .
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Post by littlemama on Jul 9, 2021 12:03:11 GMT
100%. He is my everything and the only person who knows who I am deep down to my soul.❤
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Post by MZF on Jul 9, 2021 12:06:07 GMT
Yes!
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TankTop
Pearl Clutcher
Refupea #1,871
Posts: 4,792
Location: On the couch...
Jun 28, 2014 1:52:46 GMT
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Post by TankTop on Jul 9, 2021 12:10:08 GMT
No. At one time I might have said he was, but not now.
We went through hell and back not too long ago and he is working so very hard to be a better man, husband, friend, and father. I am impressed with the work he has put in and the difficulty of that journey for him. It is still a huge work in progress with no garauntee of success.
I have learned through that experience that I love him dearly, that even when he has messed up I can stand by him, that I can support him… but I can’t ever wrap 100% into anyone ever again.
Now I have what I consider to be best friends in different roles… -My bestie/pseudo-counselor that I can tell all the thoughts to and never be judged -My work bestie who gets a filtered version of me -Our couple besties who get a small view from the sidelines
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Sarah*H
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,986
Jun 25, 2014 20:07:06 GMT
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Post by Sarah*H on Jul 9, 2021 12:44:27 GMT
He was my best friend for 3 years before we started dating and that has never changed. I have other close, good friends but he still fills that role in my life.
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Post by floridagirl on Jul 9, 2021 12:49:16 GMT
Yes for the past 34 years..... My first jack-ass did not have my back....
My DH always thinks someone is gonna steal me.... ha...I always tell him they would give me right back.
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Post by padresfan619 on Jul 9, 2021 13:19:56 GMT
No. My best friend has been around way longer than my husband.
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luckyjune
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,685
Location: In the rainy, rainy WA
Jul 22, 2017 4:59:41 GMT
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Post by luckyjune on Jul 9, 2021 13:46:37 GMT
DH is the only person with whom I am 100% authentic. That takes enormous trust. So, in that regard, yes, he's my best friend.
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Post by Bridget in MD on Jul 9, 2021 14:23:14 GMT
Nope - he is not.
A couple of years ago I was at a funeral of my neighbor's husband. She mentioned at the eulogy that he was her best friend, and it struck me then - I didnt consider my DH my best friend, so I asked a couple of friends after if they considered their husbands their best friends, and many of them said yes.
I asked my DH "Am I your best friend?" and he laughed and said no. I said, good, I feel the same way! LOL
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scorpeao
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,521
Location: NorCal USA
Jun 25, 2014 21:04:54 GMT
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Post by scorpeao on Jul 9, 2021 14:24:39 GMT
nope
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Post by withapea on Jul 9, 2021 14:29:09 GMT
Yes. Obviously he’s more than just that but yes, absolutely. I also have a best girl friend who is like a sister to me. I couldn’t imagine going through life without them. I consider myself very lucky.
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Post by Katie on Jul 9, 2021 14:29:50 GMT
No, my sister is. And I know the reason is because DH is not a talker. He rarely shares his feelings, and he just doesn’t talk about things…he is a man of few words. I can talk to my sister all dang day and not run out of things to talk about. I have another sister that is not quite my best friend, but I do consider her to be more of a bestie than my DH.
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Post by Susie_Homemaker on Jul 9, 2021 14:34:35 GMT
Yes, in the sense that he's the one person that I want to share everything with. I can share my thoughts and feelings with him, we enjoy each other and when we were separated (5 years ago- now back together) I felt like a part of me was missing. I missed him and "us" terribly. (having said that, I also learned that I can live without him if it came to that and I don't have that "need" like I once did) I do have my best girlfriends as well and he doesn't replace my need for them. I see my BF from HS a few times a year (we live in different states) and she's my soul sister and I have a group of friends locally that I couldn't live without!
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Post by KikiPea on Jul 9, 2021 14:39:43 GMT
Yes. We spend most of our time together. I do have 3ladies I consider my best friends, and a few close friends, but he’s the one I do most things with.
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J u l e e
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,531
Location: Cincinnati
Jun 28, 2014 2:50:47 GMT
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Post by J u l e e on Jul 9, 2021 14:53:59 GMT
No. At one time I might have said he was, but not now. We went through hell and back not too long ago and he is working so very hard to be a better man, husband, friend, and father. I am impressed with the work he has put in and the difficulty of that journey for him. It is still a huge work in progress with no garauntee of success. I have learned through that experience that I love him dearly, that even when he has messed up I can stand by him, that I can support him… but I can’t ever wrap 100% into anyone ever again. Now I have what I consider to be best friends in different roles… -My bestie/pseudo-counselor that I can tell all the thoughts to and never be judged -My work bestie who gets a filtered version of me -Our couple besties who get a small view from the sidelines This is super honest and I relate to the fact that I can’t say the 100% part about anything/or anyone. Unless it’s just a simple response, I honestly can’t even imagine a 100% answer. I’m sure that says something very broken about me - even if it’s just something as small as I generally always have a filter so I don’t hurt people’s feelings, or shielding a lot of my own past hurt, I don’t know. I’ve been sitting here thinking about everyone’s replies for far too long! =). Yours stood out to me. Probably a simple answer is better =)
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Post by malibou on Jul 9, 2021 14:59:10 GMT
Best friend is certainly one of his roles. We are definitely each other's person.
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TXMary
Pearl Clutcher
And so many nights I just dream of the ocean. God, I wish I was sailin' again.
Posts: 2,841
Jun 26, 2014 17:25:06 GMT
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Post by TXMary on Jul 9, 2021 15:12:28 GMT
No. He's a wonderful husband and I love him very much. We've been married for almost 35 years and been together for 37 years. We have a great marriage. But he's not my best friend.
My best friend was my sister but she died in February of 2020 and I don't really have a local best friend anymore. I do have one friend that I would say is my best friend right now and we chat on messenger every day, often multiple times a day, and I can tell her anything. But she's in Oklahoma and I'm in Texas so we don't see each other much. We are meeting her and her husband in San Diego next month and I'm so excited.
I really miss having someone to have lunch with or go to the movies with. I miss my sister.
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Post by mayceesgranny on Jul 9, 2021 15:14:06 GMT
This sums it up for us. My dh is a great supporter and would do anything for me, but I don't think he understands me the way a best friend would.
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Post by karenlou on Jul 9, 2021 15:18:31 GMT
No. He's a wonderful husband and I love him very much. We've been married for almost 35 years and been together for 37 years. We have a great marriage. But he's not my best friend. My best friend was my sister but she died in February of 2020 and I don't really have a local best friend anymore. I do have one friend that I would say is my best friend right now and we chat on messenger every day, often multiple times a day, and I can tell her anything. But she's in Oklahoma and I'm in Texas so we don't see each other much. We are meeting her and her husband in San Diego next month and I'm so excited. I really miss having someone to have lunch with or go to the movies with. I miss my sister. I am so sorry..BIG HUGS to you....I know how you feel, I would be lost without my sister XOXOXO
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artbabe
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,148
Jun 26, 2014 1:59:10 GMT
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Post by artbabe on Jul 9, 2021 15:22:14 GMT
This is really interesting to me. I've never been married, but throughout my life who I was dating was always my best friend. I've never had a girl best friend. Honestly, until the past few years I haven't had close female friends at all.
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StephDRebel
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,668
Location: Ohio
Jul 5, 2014 1:53:49 GMT
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Post by StephDRebel on Jul 9, 2021 15:23:42 GMT
No way.
He is my partner and the other half to our team but my relationship with my best friend is completely different. She was there before him and walked with me through things that he will never be able to understand.
If i had to choose, i would choose both- the relationships are so different.
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Post by peace on Jul 9, 2021 15:31:16 GMT
I do now- not with ex. Ex used to say things like I was his best friend and his soulmate. I never felt like he was mine.
Fast forward to current partner- we've been together almost 7 years and he is my best friend. I don't believe in soulmates.
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Post by whipea on Jul 9, 2021 15:34:18 GMT
No. But I wouldn’t say that I really have a best friend at all. Same.
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Post by workingclassdog on Jul 9, 2021 15:51:46 GMT
No not really... I mean we are close and share everything but there are things that he doesn't 'get' like my best friend does. Just mainly girl type stuff I guess.. there are different levels. My husband is my husband and he is my number one.. but my bff will always be my bff.. since 1986 on St. Patty's Day. It's all good. I think DH would look at me with two heads if I said he was my bff.
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Post by mnmloveli on Jul 9, 2021 16:29:31 GMT
DH has been my best friend for 25 years. No one has ever had my back like he does. He’s 100% supportive of me, and I of him. He frequently tells me everyone should be married to their best friend & soul mate.
We did not meet until our mid-thirties, but it was so worth the wait and I wouldn’t change a thing.
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Post by roxiemarie0524 on Jul 9, 2021 16:42:37 GMT
DH and I have a great relationship but he is not my best friend and I don’t want him to be. I’ve known my best friend since we were 10 and she is like my sister. The role she fulfills in my life is not one that my husband could fulfill. It is an entirely different kind of relationship. Plus, no matter how much I love my husband, I don’t want him to be my only source of emotional support. It’s healthier for me this way. This is me too - I have know my best friend since I was 11, and she is a sister to me. The relationship that I have with her is different than my husband. I love my husband so much and we are a support to each other in so may ways, but it is just different with my best friend.
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rgibson
Full Member
Posts: 467
Apr 26, 2021 22:49:21 GMT
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Post by rgibson on Jul 9, 2021 17:07:39 GMT
No he's not my best friend but he is an awesome husband and I'm very glad we found each other for our second go round.
I have always had a lot of friends however I have big trust issues and I only ever shared secrets and feelings with one person but she passed away a decade or so ago and I still miss her terribly. However, although I shared a lot with her, even she didn't know how bad my first marriage was.
Dh always, always has my back and I must admit, it is still a little unnerving to me since I never experienced that in my first marriage. I know he wishes it were otherwise but I still don't share a lot with him; it's hard to undo decades of keeping things inside. I would suspect both he and his late wife would say they were best friends but he doesn't push me, he knows how shitty my first marriage was and how horrible the ex was and still is years later.
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Post by cindyupnorth on Jul 9, 2021 17:37:00 GMT
Hell no. He would make a horrible best friend. I have had the same best friend my entire life. We grew up together, have the same hometown, bdays 2 days apart, etc. My dh is my husband. He sometimes isn't there all the time for me, he sometimes doesn't defend me or get me, he sometimes puts me 2nd. But he's still my husband, and we get along pretty good, and it works.
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Jul 9, 2021 17:44:28 GMT
But I wouldn’t say that I really have a best friend at all. my DH is probably the closest thing I have TO a best friend; I wouldn't say I've ever had a 'best friend' like some people think of it, either. (I picture 'best friend' as a girly type thing, to go shopping / chat about girly stuff, etc.) ETA: my DH and I can talk together about pretty much any topic under the sun, and I know he's in my corner if anything happens to me (health crisis, death in my family, etc.), and I have been for him, so if that's what you consider 'best friend' then yeah.
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