caro
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Post by caro on Jun 2, 2015 13:58:54 GMT
Did you have special snacks/food that your mother wouldn't feed you at home? And how did your mom respond?
I've referenced my American Girl camp I'm hosting for my 5 granddaughters here this summer in a couple of posts and I have another question.
I'm going to have a basket full of snacks where the girls can choose what they would like. I will have some healthy options in the basket but part of me wants to also offer junk food. My DD's family is totally organic healthy foods/no junk. One DS's family is semi-healthy and one DS's family is junk food-aholics
My feeling is "what happens at Gigi's stays at Gigi's". kwim? Tell me what you think and any fond memories you have at your grandparents house.
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grinningcat
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Post by grinningcat on Jun 2, 2015 14:01:23 GMT
My grandmother served a lot of great things when I stayed there. I don't think my mom cared, let alone said anything about what was served. Do parents really do that?
The one thing I do every year to commemorate my grandmother is arrowroot cookies spread with canned icing. She would serve that for afternoon tea with me. It was fantastic. I honour her twice a year by having it as a treat for afternoon tea.
What happens at grandma's stays at grandma's... parents need to butt out.
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caro
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Post by caro on Jun 2, 2015 14:03:35 GMT
My grandfather always had orange slice sugared candy in a jar by his chair and it was a special treat for me and my brother.
My mother always had Goldfish in little Dixie Cups for her grands/great grands. My dad always had lollipops in a candy jar or M & M's in a jar by his chair for the grands. My children loved it.
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Post by myshelly on Jun 2, 2015 14:04:10 GMT
I don't have any memories of this wen I was young.
My experience with this as an adult is that when I used to (notice the past tense) send my kids to my parents, my parents would feed them so much junk food and sugar (which they weren't used to) that my kids came home throwing up every single time they went to visit. For this and other reasons I no longer trust my parents' judgment and they no longer see the kids unsupervised.
I think there's a fine line between normal grandparent spoiling and completely disrespecting parenting choices. Don't cross the line.
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caro
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Post by caro on Jun 2, 2015 14:06:28 GMT
I have more sense that crossing a line like that. Plus, I don't want to deal with throw up if I don't have too.
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brandy327
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Post by brandy327 on Jun 2, 2015 14:06:39 GMT
My grandparents didn't have anything store bought but we were ALWAYS in my grandma's kitchen when she was making cookies or fudge. And we were allowed to eat as many as grandpa would let us.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 2, 2015 14:07:10 GMT
My Nannie made biscuits from scratch in a cast iron skillet every day. And gravy. My mom never made hot foods for breakfast so Nannie's hot biscuits n gravy were a divine departure from the norm.
Nannie used home churned butter too. She would take soft butter and pour some syrup in it and mix it with a fork. And slather it on the biscuits.
Sweet memories.
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Post by lindah on Jun 2, 2015 14:11:13 GMT
My Nannie made biscuits from scratch in a cast iron skillet every day. And gravy. My mom never made hot foods for breakfast so Nannie's hot biscuits n gravy were a divine departure from the norm. Nannie used home churned butter too. She would take soft butter and pour some syrup in it and mix it with a fork. And slather it on the biscuits. Sweet memories. Nannie must have lived in the South!
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grammanisi
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Post by grammanisi on Jun 2, 2015 14:14:43 GMT
We weren't really restricted on what we could have at home, so when I went to my grandparents I didn't have anything that my mom would have cared about.
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caro
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Post by caro on Jun 2, 2015 14:15:32 GMT
My Nannie made biscuits from scratch in a cast iron skillet every day. And gravy. My mom never made hot foods for breakfast so Nannie's hot biscuits n gravy were a divine departure from the norm. Nannie used home churned butter too. She would take soft butter and pour some syrup in it and mix it with a fork. And slather it on the biscuits. Sweet memories. Nannie must have lived in the South! You can bet sDeven grandmother did. My grandmother was a great cook and used her cast iron skillet long before it was cool
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Post by roundtwo on Jun 2, 2015 14:15:47 GMT
I'm going to have a basket full of snacks where the girls can choose what they would like. I will have some healthy options in the basket but part of me wants to also offer junk food. My DD's family is totally organic healthy foods/no junk. One DS's family is semi-healthy and one DS's family is junk food-aholics My feeling is "what happens at Gigi's stays at Gigi's". kwim? Tell me what you think and any fond memories you have at your grandparents house. My grandparents always had different things from home, some were a good different, some bad (old cheese at grandma and grandpa's always caught me up no matter how many times I tried it thinking it was something better ). I agree that what happens at your house stays at your house. My parents never interfered and I don't remember ever being asked what we had and I never asked or interfered when my kids visited my parents. I think your idea to offer some good choices and some junk choices is fair to all concerned.
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Post by littlemama on Jun 2, 2015 14:15:52 GMT
Heavens no, my one grandmother who lived near us was a horrible cook, and the only "treat" she ever had were occasionally Nutter Butters or Hydrox (not even Oreos LOL).
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Post by anxiousmom on Jun 2, 2015 14:18:00 GMT
I will answer as a parent who sent her kid's off to "Mimi Camp" as often as she would take them... My mother raised me just fine, and I trust her to do right with my kids. She can make whatever choices for food or junk or whatever that she wants. I have never, not once, given her any instructions on what to feed or not feed the kids, what time they went to bed, or where she could or could not take them. But that is me, and I my mom and I are pretty similar in a lot of ways (after all, I learned from her ) The boys laugh all the time when I tell them that if they don't like what I am telling them they are welcome to call her for a second opinion...because according to them, she is the original opinion and mine is the second and they are identical. To me, since you are the grandmother who is doing such a cool thing like you are doing, I say you have free range to do what you want as far as snacks go. But I don't know your kid-in-laws and if they are the sort who have strong feelings about junk food and would hold it against you, that probably should be taken into consideration.
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Post by originalvanillabean on Jun 2, 2015 14:22:26 GMT
I loved going to my grandmothers house to visit.
Overnight stayovers were the best.
I don't remember her feeding me anything completely different.
She used to have these colored ice cream bowls, and I loved that she always served me in the purple one. She frequently made homemade ice cream so that is my most fond memory.
So...to answer your question, I don't remember getting a lot of junk food, but my niece belongs to an organic only (no meat) household. When she visits me I let her have a couple pieces of chocolate or a cookie or cupcake or something, but I don't feed her any meat.
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freebird
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Post by freebird on Jun 2, 2015 14:23:12 GMT
I had one grandmother that had her own bakery!! *drools*l There was always a treat there but she didn't let you have anything you wanted. If she had some donuts, we might get one of the odd shaped ones. My other grandmother always had those cheap iced oatmeal cookies in a black kettle cookie jar. She'd let us have one or two.
My husband's granddaughter visits us and we don't let her go whole hog on treats. We'll do special stuff like go get ice cream (or at home) or go to McDonalds but we make healthy food too.
I think the best option is to put out a variety and let the kids pick. Don't let anyone have too much junk and you should be ok unless they have completely control freak parents, then nothing you pick will be good enough.
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Post by epeanymous on Jun 2, 2015 14:23:30 GMT
I think it is fine if the parents are fine with it, but, honestly, if you think the parents would be upset if you fed their kids junk food, why would you do it?
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Post by crazy4scraps on Jun 2, 2015 14:23:46 GMT
We rarely went to our grandma's house. We had a big family and she lived 1.5 hours away, so taking 8 kids aged 0-16 anywhere all at once was close to impossible. We never went there for overnights, ever. All of our other grandparents were already gone by then. My one remaining grandma was around 70 by the time I was born, and she wasn't a "young" 70 either like my mom was.
We did occasionally have individual sleepovers at my aunt's house but other than homemade treats similar to what we had at home, they didn't really have anything different. Once in a while my mom's twin would bring us those huge lollipops (like 4"-6" across) that would take a week to eat. I'm sure my mom just LOVED that!
My kid has no bio grandparents alive, so anyone who wants to spoil her a little in that way is allowed to. She has a number of honorary grandparents and we let them do what they want. Thankfully no one ever seems to go over the line of what we think is reasonable.
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Post by Susie_Homemaker on Jun 2, 2015 14:24:05 GMT
I would definitely put some junk food in the basket, it's no fun if you don't! If there are healthy/organic choices along with junk food then it's the kids choice what they want (so you're off the hook! ) Since junk food is a treat for some of your grands then it should definitely be at your house. Who wants to remember going to grandma's house and eating all that wonderful healthy, organic food?! That's for normal life, not fun time at grandma's. ETA: I agree that the treats should be in moderation. Not that I think you would but don't feed them *only* junk food or let them have all that they want. It's a 'treat' which to me means a nice serving of whatever it is to go along with a healthy meal.
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Post by liya on Jun 2, 2015 14:24:13 GMT
I don't have any memories of this wen I was young. My experience with this as an adult is that when I used to (notice the past tense) send my kids to my parents, my parents would feed them so much junk food and sugar (which they weren't used to) that my kids came home throwing up every single time they went to visit. For this and other reasons I no longer trust my parents' judgment and they no longer see the kids unsupervised. I think there's a fine line between normal grandparent spoiling and completely disrespecting parenting choices. Don't cross the line. My Dad wanted to be the first one to feed my DD soft custard when she was a toddler (almost 20 years ago.) I believe it is made with whole milk/cream so he had to wait until she was drinking milk and since we lived out of town; we had to be home for a visit and the stand had to be open for the season. When all the "stars were aligned" and DD had her first taste of vanilla custard she loved it going down but not so much coming back up. That stuff is really rich; I still can't each much of it. My Dad felt awful.
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Post by khaleesi on Jun 2, 2015 14:24:52 GMT
Many things! Gumdrops - I always ate the red and orange ones Sizzlean bacon - I remember loving the stuff and she knew how to fry it up crispy (Now as an adult I know how horrific this probably was but it was a huge treat for breakfast there!) Nilla Wafers - not a knock off brand Fig Newtons Fudgesicles Totinos frozen party pizza Watermelon because grandpa taught me to salt it lightly and to spit seeds We did have watermelon at my house but were not allowed to salt it or spit seeds I'm sure there are others but those are what immediately spring to mind. My step granddaughter is too young still but I do plan to make sure the what happens at grandma's stays at grandma's but not to the point of breaking every rule. I think there is a balance while still respecting her parents wishes. Since she's still a baby her spoiling from me right now is going home in a new outfit each time I see her
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Post by moveablefeast on Jun 2, 2015 14:24:56 GMT
My mom has a weight problem, my MIL has a weight problem, my DH has a weight problem, I have a weight problem. My niece who lives with my MIL has a weight problem. You might get my drift here.
My mom and my MIL both let the kids eat whatever they want in whatever quantity they want.
I own it - I fight against that because I know where that habit will lead. Left to her own devices my mom will let my DD eat a candy bar, cake and ice cream, and cheetos all in the same afternoon. I'm not okay with that at all.
So that colors my perspective. I would say - enjoy some treats, but in actual moderation. My mom tries to call that "minimal treats" and it isn't. In actual moderation I have NO problems with any of it.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 2, 2015 14:26:50 GMT
My grandma was a great cook but she and my mother were not far apart on what they served me. It was never an issue.
I have 3 daughters and 12 grandchildren. They all subscribe to the "what happens at granny's stays at granny's". They even made me a t shirt with that on it. I use common sense and don't feed them too much junk.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 2, 2015 14:27:01 GMT
My Nannie made biscuits from scratch in a cast iron skillet every day. And gravy. My mom never made hot foods for breakfast so Nannie's hot biscuits n gravy were a divine departure from the norm. Nannie used home churned butter too. She would take soft butter and pour some syrup in it and mix it with a fork. And slather it on the biscuits. Sweet memories. Nannie must have lived in the South! Texas born n raised, and buried.
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Post by rainangel on Jun 2, 2015 14:28:18 GMT
Both my mother and grandmothers are/were sesnible people. When we did stay overnight at grandparents' house, it was usually on a weekend, which made it okay to have more snacks than during the week. I probably remember the homemade treats the most from my grandmother. The cakes, cookies, candies... When my own kids (8 & 10) stay overnight at my parents place, it really is a free for all with snacks and iPad access But they also take the kids swimming, fishing, hiking, visiting my grandparents, shopping, skiing.... So unlimited iPad-access the few hours they actually spend inside the house, with an abundance of snacks ready.... I couldn't care less. My parents are fantastic grandparents, and I allow them to spoil them rotten. The kids are fully aware of the difference between our house, and their grandparents house. The rules are different, and they respect that. If some of your granddaughters are used to very healthy food, give them that option. They might not be comfortable with junkfood. Give a range of options from junkfood to healthy, and there will be something for everyone. But yeah... what happens at your house... is YOUR business IMO
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Post by JustCallMeMommy on Jun 2, 2015 14:29:18 GMT
Before my grandfather died, there were always Fig Newtons in the snack container, and after he died, Granny kept homemade cookies (one of the few things she made). Her best cheese straws were often available - we have recently experimented to recreate that recipe.
She also always had cans of Coke, and I can't explain it, but her Cokes were the best I've ever had. I suspect that she kept them in the basement for a little while, and it altered the taste slightly. In the freezer, she kept frozen Snickers bars. As for meal options, there was always her famous pimento cheese.
My other grandparents usually had peppermint patties. Mammaw had a sweet tooth like me. However, the real treat at this house was the creamed corn made with corn from the garden, homemade biscuits, and real old fashioned Southern cookin'.
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caro
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Post by caro on Jun 2, 2015 14:31:08 GMT
I think it is fine if the parents are fine with it, but, honestly, if you think the parents would be upset if you fed their kids junk food, why would you do it? I would only do it in moderation. And my DD and I have differing opinions on junk food. I see nothing wrong with an occasional Hostess Cupcake.
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zztop11
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Post by zztop11 on Jun 2, 2015 14:32:48 GMT
Not that my mother wouldn't feed me at home, but my bubby made certain things that were special to me. Now this is over 50 years ago. But I still remember how special they were to me. She lived 4 hours away and we didn't get to see her that often. When we would arrive in NYC, we'd go up the elevator. Fought with sisters and brother who would get to push the button. When we walked in her house, she would have warm fresh chocolate pudding waiting for us in little cups. Yum! And she made the most special chocolate chip cookies and snickerdoodle cookies. We always thought they were her special recipes. Come to find out they are the regular recipes.They were just made by a little loving bubby
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caro
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Post by caro on Jun 2, 2015 14:36:22 GMT
I don't want to come across as DD would pitch a fit or anything like that if I fed her child junk food but she would complain about detoxing her child after child came home.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 2, 2015 14:36:22 GMT
My paternal grandparents lived next door to us, so we were at their house all the time. We took turns spending the night every Friday night. Grandma bought sugary cereals like Fruity Pebbles and Lucky Charms. At home we ate Life cereal or oatmeal. So it was a huge treat to have breakfast at Grandma's.
Most of the other treats she fed us where homemade. We especially loved her no bake oatmeal cookies. There was always a basket of fruit on her table which we regularly depleted. I have happy memories of eating watermelon and spitting the seeds off her back porch, too.
My maternal grandparents were divorced and remarried with other children and grandchildren. We were never really a close part of their lives. I don't ever remember eating at their houses, and we never spend the night.
Until my dad's illness progressed to the point that Mom has to do everything for him, my kids spent at least a week during the summer with them, 12 hours away from us. My mom made sure they had lots of treats and plenty of healthy options, too. They love to talk about how Papaw let them have ice cream for breakfast. It's one of their favorite memories.
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happymomma
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Post by happymomma on Jun 2, 2015 14:36:24 GMT
Oh holy heck! Grandma's house was a free-for-all! Granted, my mom was never much of a cook nor did she care about what we ate at home, so I'm sure she didn't give it a second thought when we were at Grandma Gingie's. Gingie took us shopping and let us pick out all the yummy cereal we loved (Frankenberry, etc.) and any dang thing in the store we wanted. She also cooked incredible Polish food for us, but dinner was just as often Libbyland TV dinners that we loved. Too expensive for mom to buy, so it was a treat at Gingie's. Beyond that, Great-Grandma had an entire candy drawer in her kitchen for my brother and I. Mr. Goodbars, Hershey bars, Wrigley's gum, Cracker Jacks, you name it. I hardly think a once-in-a-while stayover at Grandma's will destroy a child's health or even lead them down the road to obesity, etc. If a set of parents are super-anal about this, I guess I would run it by them first. Sigh... On a side note, OP, I wanted to tell you that your American Girl thread did prompt me to call my Grandma Gingie that day and thank her for the amazing fun times we had with her as children. She is 85 now, and to hear her giggling as we reminisced did my heart so good. We talked for nearly two hours. Thanks for reminding me of my fun childhood escapades with Gingie.
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