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Post by crazy4scraps on Aug 21, 2015 16:43:02 GMT
Me three. I wouldn't have a problem with a shower invite before either. I like to be supportive of people's happy life events! I guess I would think that they are the kind of people who didn't want a lot of fuss, so a shower seems like an easy thing to do.. a wedding reception seems like more work and a lot of attention on the couple. My sister and her husband got married while on a year round the world trip. I threw them a wedding shower when they got back. They talked about having some sort of wedding party but never did. They just don't like to be the center of attention. (though they are both the kind of people to throw a party to celebrate someone else) Not necessarily, if they didn't have the money to do so. I think it would be a generous thing to offer, and I would definitely ask the couple for their thoughts on it before going ahead with planning the party. |
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Post by pierkiss on Aug 21, 2015 17:29:11 GMT
I like showers. They're fun and I like going shopping for the gifts for the intended person/people. I would be happy to come even if there were no follow up wedding and reception to be invited too. But Im not a big fan of the "etiquette police".  |
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Post by femalebusiness on Aug 21, 2015 19:33:58 GMT
I love the idea of throwing the shower afterwards. Thanks. Her dd wasn't sure about it based on her wedding plans but this will avoid the issues she was concerned about. She also won't register anywhere as she says they will love whatever they get. How sweet is that?!? Wow, what a refreshing attitude she has. That is one bride that I would love to shower gifts on. |
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Post by scrapmaven on Aug 21, 2015 19:55:38 GMT
I, too like the idea of throwing a little shower afterward. Seems more appropriate than throwing a shower beforehand for a wedding to which no one is invited. Afterwards sounds like a nice little gathering for the purpose of celebrating the bride. If you also choose to purchase a wedding gift in addition to the shower that is a lovely thought. I tend to have very old fashioned etiquette. So, take my opinion w/a grain of salt.
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Post by knit.pea on Aug 21, 2015 20:05:19 GMT
Definitely after.
They may not want a reception. It's their day ... let them plan
the day they want.
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Post by k8smom on Aug 21, 2015 20:42:46 GMT
Some will say it's tacky because you're asking for gifts from people that won't be at a wedding, however, you could invite me and I wouldn't bat an eye.  |
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julieb
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,845 
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Post by julieb on Aug 21, 2015 21:47:56 GMT
I think the difference is that the other bride is having a wedding with guests and wasn't inviting the shower guests to the wedding.
The wedding on this thread is much smaller. I do think this would be okay if it is more a celebration of the union and you invite couples. I wouldn't word it as a shower.
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Post by sues on Aug 21, 2015 22:01:42 GMT
Similar but not the same (to me at least). To me there is a difference between a couple choosing an intimate ceremony at the JOP excluding everyone except a handful of close family and a couple having a smallish ceremony/reception and just not inviting people who live far away. One feels like you are a part of the only outside celebration (JOP wedding) vs it just being a gift grab (small wedding far away). Kind of hard to put into words but there it is. I think a shower would be nice, either before or after the wedding. I wouldn't bat an eye if I got an invitation for a shower beforehand, knowing that the actual wedding was going to be VERY small. I agree- I think the two situations are very different. |
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Post by lucyg on Aug 21, 2015 23:02:54 GMT
Similar but not the same (to me at least). To me there is a difference between a couple choosing an intimate ceremony at the JOP excluding everyone except a handful of close family and a couple having a smallish ceremony/reception and just not inviting people who live far away. One feels like you are a part of the only outside celebration (JOP wedding) vs it just being a gift grab (small wedding far away). Kind of hard to put into words but there it is. I think a shower would be nice, either before or after the wedding. I wouldn't bat an eye if I got an invitation for a shower beforehand, knowing that the actual wedding was going to be VERY small. I agree- I think the two situations are very different. I was okay with having a shower in both cases. I'm not hung up on this thing about not inviting out-of-town friends to the wedding. Seriously, who wants to spend a lot of money traveling to an out-of-town wedding for someone who isn't a close relation? I'd much rather attend a fun shower close to home.  |
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Refupea #39
