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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2014 3:41:14 GMT
Hi this is going to sound silly but I don't know what people do for china these days (I used to work in China and giftware retail) and knew all the latest things, trends, etc. but never started a set then. Now all the patterns I liked are discontinued and they have totally different stuff out there.
Do I need a formal and informal set? I found some Denby I like (it's teal...) and I love it a lot. Would that be suitable for formal dinners too or should I just get plenty of Denby and be happy with that? My parents have beautiful formal china and totally outdated everyday stuff. I can see myself replacing my everyday stuff in 10 years' time but the formal stuff never.
I found some nice Waterford crystal at Macy's this weekend online. I could get it shipped to my US address and it is just about 30 min from where we will be living. Do I need crystal? We don't drink (we don't drink ever) but may want to have sparkling apple juice, etc when we are having company. Any opinions on this?
Elannah
I figure we will get bored with teal in 10 years' time so will want to change the china then. Maybe we will be on compostable paper plates by then? Who knows. Fancy chinette? I think maybe I will just go with the teal Denby and silverware. The crystal has always been a love of mine. Maybe I will find some cheaper stuff. I will keep looking...
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Post by scrapperal on Jul 22, 2014 3:53:14 GMT
I have a full set of beautiful china and rarely use it. I don't think formal china is a good investment unless you will be having very formal dinners often OR you just enjoy eating on fine china. I don't know anyone who uses formal china anymore, even for formal dinners.
If there is a discontinued pattern you like, you could probably find it for cheap on ebay. Place settings for my pattern are selling for 1/4 to 1/2 of the original price (plus shipping).
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Post by hennybutton on Jul 22, 2014 4:05:25 GMT
Take this from an old lady. I got the china and the crystal and the silverplate when I married in 1989. I only got two of the goblets for the crystal pattern I registered for, but MIL got us service for 12 on the china and silverplate. I ended up buying the cheap Cristal d'Arques Longchamp stuff that looks fancy, but is cheap. I used my china, etc. on special occasions for a few years, then stopped. With the exception of the cheap crystal, it all has to be hand washed. Since nobody lifted a finger to help on the occasions I used it and also kept telling my that I didn't need to put out the good stuff for them, I stopped using it. A few years ago, I got some plain white stoneware from Crate and Barrel that I use that for everything. Of course, I use paper and plastic when we have really big parties because people just have to grab a seat where they can and dishes are one less thing to worry about.
When my daughter got married, she got the Denby stoneware in black. She didn't get china because her MIL has three sets of china and wants to give one to her. I do think Denby is pretty trendy and will look dated in 10 years. But, it's also just as expensive as formal china and I would have a really hard time justifying replacing it if I owned it.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that those formal dinners I imagined when I got married never materialized. I ended up with dishes I never use and I just replaced the formal living room furniture that was too stuffy and uncomfortable for anyone to use. Go for what makes you comfortable and fits your lifestyle as it is now. If you need/want more formal in the future, deal with it in the future.
Edited to add: I like plain, basic wine glasses when I have a glass of wine. I think the fancy crystal is one of those things I saw as a necessity in 1989 that I'm glad I didn't get in 1989.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2014 4:15:17 GMT
When I was married in 1987, I didn't register for china, crystal or silver. We used Corelle dishes and got some silverware with our monogram from Fingerhut. (no lie...we were young...paid for our own wedding...DH had student loans) A few years later, my Grandmother gave me her china and crystal...service for 12. I've used it quite a bit, but not so much anymore.
I'm so glad I have my Grandmother's set for sentimental reasons alone, but I'm glad I never purchased or had people purchase china or crystal for me.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2014 4:19:27 GMT
I do nothing about china. In my world it is a waste of money to buy because it will never be used. I have a set of fairly plain corelle that can be dressed up as far as I will ever dress up a table. Since your son is 18 I know you are older than 20. Realistically, how often have you hosted a formal dinner? Use that as the guide for it you really need china or not.
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anniebygaslight
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Post by anniebygaslight on Jul 22, 2014 4:53:45 GMT
Someone gave us an unspeakably hideous Royal Albert dinner service and tea service when we got married. I don't think it has ever come out of the box.
We have a lovely white china set, with a gold pattern around the edge. It has to be hand washed, and I can't be arsed, so that rarely comes out.
We tend to use a Denby set for entertaining, and an an assortment of odds and ends for every day grab a snack type eating.
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Post by luv2scrapaboutmykids on Jul 22, 2014 4:56:46 GMT
Do people use china and crystal anymore? I have had china for 22 years (used only twice because it has to be hand washed). I would not waste money on either.
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Post by Eddie-n-Harley on Jul 22, 2014 4:59:30 GMT
If it can't be put in the dishwasher, I don't want it. I love my corelle. I do have an additional set of large dinner plates I got on clearance at Target once upon a time that are a kind of stonewear like finish-- I think you can get a lot of things that LOOK fancier than they might officially be categorized. As far as crystal-- actual crystal has lead in it, so it's up to you if you want to use it. Personally, I think there's nothing wrong with ordinary glass flutes instead of cut crystal ones. But I also use the same fork for my salad, dinner, AND dessert, so I am hardly your etiquette resource tonight.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2014 4:59:39 GMT
In 20 years of marriage, I have hosted all kinds of events. I have never used china in any of them. My grandmother's gold rimmed fancy stuff is packed properly sitting in my garage. I would never part with it but I have no desire to use it either.
I have a collection of white ironstone, red transferware, blue willow, and aqua handmade plates. We almost never use paper...real plates are my delight...but China is just overkill in my opinion.
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Post by scraphollie27 on Jul 22, 2014 5:07:25 GMT
I have five sets of dishes (two are china from my Nana and MIL) and, frankly, it is a pain in the butt. I almost exclusively use my Fiestaware because when I drag out the china, it all has to be hand washed and after a big, elaborate meal, it's a lot of work. I also have to store all of these sets of dishes which brings its own set of issues.
If you don't drink, I wouldn't buy crystal. Just more pieces to store that are unlikely to get used.
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Post by KiwiJo on Jul 22, 2014 5:08:14 GMT
I am another who has no use for fine china - not able to go into the dishwasher being a big part of it. There are so many other lovely sets that are nice to look at, nice to eat, not as expensive, and can go in the dishwasher.
As as for crystal, it certainly is great to drink from, and I would enjoy crystal glasses as long as they are plain. I would have no use for cut crystal.
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paget
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Post by paget on Jul 22, 2014 5:14:59 GMT
I've never had china and didn't want it. I've been married 20 years and not one time did I wish I had it. My dishes are a mix of pottery barn stuff (I used to work there with 40% discount) and fiesta stuff.
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grinningcat
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Post by grinningcat on Jul 22, 2014 11:22:29 GMT
Do people use china and crystal anymore? I have had china for 22 years (used only twice because it has to be hand washed). I would not waste money on either. Yes! I love using china and crystal. It makes any service look so pretty. My most frequent use of china and crystal is formal afternoon tea. There's nothing like serving tea from silver into lovely, thin china cups. I used to be all about the modern, heavy stuff but now I find myself enjoying the beauty of turn of the century china. The hate for china on this thread kind of makes me mad. It's so beautiful, why not use it?
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Jul 22, 2014 12:02:48 GMT
I know. Sigh. I have multiple sets of all of it -- china, crystal, sterling flatware -- and I use it all. I even use crystal knife rests, individual salt cellars, and other persnickety accouterments. It brings me great pleasure to set a gorgeous table and share that with family and friends. We don't eat every meal that way obviously, but I pull it all out several times per month. If you can't be bothered to hand wash a dish once a year for a special occasion meal, I don't want to know you. (Just kidding!)
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grinningcat
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Post by grinningcat on Jul 22, 2014 12:11:19 GMT
I know. Sigh. I have multiple sets of all of it -- china, crystal, sterling flatware -- and I use it all. I even use crystal knife rests, individual salt cellars, and other persnickety accouterments. It brings me great pleasure to set a gorgeous table and share that with family and friends. We don't eat every meal that way obviously, but I pull it all out several times per month. If you can't be bothered to hand wash a dish once a year for a special occasion meal, I don't want to know you. (Just kidding!) I am slowly gathering all the "persnickety accoutrements". I am working towards having the traditional 8 course meal, with all the different plates and forks and all the nonsense. I aim to set the table for a traditional Victorian multi-course meal. I do love the "persnickety accoutrements" of tea services. I just recently acquired a silver sugar bowl and creamer. I am working towards the full silver tea service. Sigh. I need to serve afternoon tea one day soon.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2014 12:11:58 GMT
The hate for china on this thread kind of makes me mad. It's so beautiful, why not use it? I don't see anyone that said they hate china. Just some realities about the time it takes to prepare a formal dinner then the time it takes to hand wash the dishes after; if china is used. If it is formal enough to china then my guests are going to be dressed to the nines too. I don't want them helping me with the dishes afterward in their good clothes and I don't want to spend a lot of time hand washing by myself later that night after everyone goes home. Nothing to do with hating china. Everything to do with a dislike of washing dishes. Also the need for extra storage space which I don't have. Which is why what everyone else does is irrelevant to the OP's question. What does she want to do?
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grinningcat
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Post by grinningcat on Jul 22, 2014 12:17:58 GMT
The hate for china on this thread kind of makes me mad. It's so beautiful, why not use it? I don't see anyone that said they hate china. Just some realities about the time it takes to prepare a formal dinner then the time it takes to hand wash the dishes after; if china is used. If it is formal enough to china then my guests are going to be dressed to the nines too. I don't want them helping me with the dishes afterward in their good clothes and I don't want to spend a lot of time hand washing by myself later that night after everyone goes home. Nothing to do with hating china. Everything to do with a dislike of washing dishes. Which is why what everyone else does is irrelevant to the OP's question. What does she want to do? Okay. Fair point. But why only use china for formal events? Why not use it for Sunday meals or even regular meals? We put some china in our daily rotation and it just makes things feel so much prettier and special. I don't know. I guess I don't keep it for only formal occasions. It used to be that Sunday dinner was formal occasion enough, so I suppose I go from that (though not always dinner on Sundays). Sometimes I think I was born in the wrong era. But yes, this thread is about what the OP wants to do. Does she need a formal and informal set? No, there is no need, but I think it would be nice to have. I've never had Denby's stuff, but if it's for everyday... why not change it out when you get bored of it. I do that all the time. Give away the boring ugly stuff and get something new. That's so much fun. As for the crystal, I would say yes get it. Everything tastes better in crystal! But maybe wait until you're settled into your house before ordering.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2014 12:19:06 GMT
I use my china and silver all the time -- I still love it 30 years after I got it. It had been put away when the kids were little, but now that they're teens, I have it back out. I never make fancy gourmet meals anymore, but I serve anything from pancakes to salads to hamburgers to desserts on my china. I love having Sunday breakfast with all the fancy stuff. DS even pulls out the crystal goblets and candlesticks when we have breakfast.
But I have a lot of help -- it does need hand washing.
Otherwise we use the cute melamine plates from Target.
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Nanner
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Post by Nanner on Jul 22, 2014 12:20:10 GMT
I chose my pattern in the 70s, and have a full set of china. I don't use it much but every single piece means a great deal to me, because each piece was a gift from either my mother or my grandmother.
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Post by 1lear on Jul 22, 2014 12:22:19 GMT
I'v never had formal china or crystal, although I do think it's pretty. I just don't have room for it. I say go with what you love.
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Post by Tamhugh on Jul 22, 2014 12:27:51 GMT
I don't have good china or crystal. I use my Fiestaware for everyday and for special occasions. I do have nice Oneida flatware (stainless, not sterling) that I use for special things and I use my holiday Pfaltzgraff from Thanksgiving until New Years. That being said, I do covet some nice crystal. Even water seems to taste better in a nice crystal glass.
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Post by anxiousmom on Jul 22, 2014 12:30:33 GMT
Do people use china and crystal anymore? I have had china for 22 years (used only twice because it has to be hand washed). I would not waste money on either. Yes! I love using china and crystal. It makes any service look so pretty. My most frequent use of china and crystal is formal afternoon tea. There's nothing like serving tea from silver into lovely, thin china cups. I used to be all about the modern, heavy stuff but now I find myself enjoying the beauty of turn of the century china. The hate for china on this thread kind of makes me mad. It's so beautiful, why not use it? I love my china and use it every day. But. I did it exactly opposite from everyone else I think. I wanted my children to grow up using "real" dishes, not plastic, not whatever. So I marched down to Goodwill and bought pieces of someone else's grandmother's china. None of it matches of course, but when the table it is set, it looks nice. I have real silver, again-random pieces that I have picked up over the years at Goodwill. Because I don't have an emotional investment in the china, I don't care if it gets broken-I just head back to Goodwill and pick up another piece. I *do* put the china in the dishwasher, but wash the silver by hand. We also use cloth napkins every night. I do have some stoneware-we use it if we are heating a plate in the microwave because you can't use the china. It works for us.
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Jul 22, 2014 12:32:22 GMT
I'd love to be on your guest list.
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grinningcat
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Post by grinningcat on Jul 22, 2014 12:33:03 GMT
Yes! I love using china and crystal. It makes any service look so pretty. My most frequent use of china and crystal is formal afternoon tea. There's nothing like serving tea from silver into lovely, thin china cups. I used to be all about the modern, heavy stuff but now I find myself enjoying the beauty of turn of the century china. The hate for china on this thread kind of makes me mad. It's so beautiful, why not use it? I love my china and use it every day. But. I did it exactly opposite from everyone else I think. I wanted my children to grow up using "real" dishes, not plastic, not whatever. So I marched down to Goodwill and bought pieces of someone else's grandmother's china. None of it matches of course, but when the table it is set, it looks nice. I have real silver, again-random pieces that I have picked up over the years at Goodwill. Because I don't have an emotional investment in the china, I don't care if it gets broken-I just head back to Goodwill and pick up another piece. I *do* put the china in the dishwasher, but wash the silver by hand. We also use cloth napkins every night. I do have some stoneware-we use it if we are heating a plate in the microwave because you can't use the china. It works for us. That's a great idea! I love the look of mismatched china on a table. And it's a good way to teach kids how to handle real dishes.
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mallie
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Post by mallie on Jul 22, 2014 12:35:35 GMT
I have never had an urge for real china. For formal occasions, I have a a set of glass plates that work very well. And they were cheap. Break one? Just go buy another glass plate. NBD.
As it happens, I was just in a thrift store run by a local hospice talking to the manager. I noted that the place was chockablock full of full formal china sets. The manager told me that they were donations by people in their 50s and up who said they never used them. I thought they were overpriced in the sense that I doubt the typical thrift store customer has $550 in her pocket to buy a china set.
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grinningcat
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Post by grinningcat on Jul 22, 2014 12:35:47 GMT
I'd love to be on your guest list. If you were close by, I'd put you on the list! I am slowly acquiring full services for a business plan I am working towards. And the best part is that I get to use it whenever I want!
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MaryC
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Post by MaryC on Jul 22, 2014 12:38:22 GMT
Most of my china is displayed in the china cabinet and is never used. I have three beautiful services for eight - two inherited, one received as a wedding gift from the company where I worked, and one service for twelve. I also have crystal which is stored in a cupboard and again never used. I do love china teacups, just because they remind me of having afternoon tea with my mom, but the tea itself is made in my old brown betty teapot.
We use fiesta for everyday and most of the entertaining we do. I love the look of a formal table, but not the work involved in hand-washing the dishes and putting them up afterward. I also don't want to have to hunt down replacements if something gets broken.
Because I'm the only one who would appreciate it, and it's not worth the work and nagging involved to use it just for my own pleasure. Most of the guests I have care more about the food itself than the way it's presented, and they are far more likely to appreciate sturdy dishes they don't have to worry about breaking. Even informal family dinners at our house usually involve cooking for at least ten people; at Thanksgiving and other holidays it's more like eighty to one hundred. That's tiring enough with having to worry about hand-washing everything afterward, or fussing at the kids about how to do it correctly when they are used to just putting everything in the dishwasher.
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Post by MommyofTriplets on Jul 22, 2014 12:43:22 GMT
We use our china a couple times a year. I still love the pattern I chose 16 years ago and it makes me happy to use it. Do you need it? Probably not, but it's nice to have.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2014 13:31:29 GMT
My mother tried to give me a silver tea service when I graduated from university. I said no thank you because it wasn't practical (I was leaving for Japan in 10 days). They gave me money instead. I bought a really good camera instead. One day I will inherit her's. (If I polished it all I could have it today if I wanted. If I have time I will take a picture of it and show it to everyone. It is very beautiful).
I think I will be ok with the everyday china and forget about the good stuff that we will only use once a year. In a year's time if I think I need it I will get it.
The crystal thing is important as my dad likes to drink wine and booze and I will need something for him. DSO and I won't mind him drinking in our house as it is just us who can't drink. We don't have to enforce our values on someone else.
As for flatware I am going to look at Oneida. I had it once before and liked it a lot. I will see what I can get and what feels good in my hands and DSO's hands.
Am I really doing this again?
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Post by moveablefeast on Jul 22, 2014 13:35:50 GMT
I bought secondhand china in a classic pattern. It is pretty and I don't expect it to ever look dated. I use it whenever the mood strikes. Hand washing is not my favorite task, but sometimes I just like to use my china.
Mostly I don't like things that are fussy and high maintenance. But I like china. I keep it pretty simple (I don't go in for the individual salt cellars and whatnot) and it is only a small chore, and for me a fair trade for a little pleasure in life.
Me personally - I cannot picture myself with teal china. It wouldn't suit me at all. But you should pick what suits you and your lifestyle. I'm a big fan of basic and affordable, so my setup is perfect for now.
I also don't have big formal dinner parties. But sometimes I fix a really nice dish for supper with or without guests (we have guests more often than not, so it's not a formal thing for us to fix dinner for folks) and think it would be nice to put it on the fancy plates.
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