China (the kind you eat off) questions, crystal etc?--Edited

Take this from an old lady. I got the china and the crystal and the silverplate when I married in 1989. I only got two of the goblets for the crystal pattern I registered for, but MIL got us service for 12 on the china and silverplate. I ended up buying the cheap Cristal d'Arques Longchamp stuff that looks fancy, but is cheap. I used my china, etc. on special occasions for a few years, then stopped. With the exception of the cheap crystal, it all has to be hand washed. Since nobody lifted a finger to help on the occasions I used it and also kept telling my that I didn't need to put out the good stuff for them, I stopped using it. A few years ago, I got some plain white stoneware from Crate and Barrel that I use that for everything. Of course, I use paper and plastic when we have really big parties because people just have to grab a seat where they can and dishes are one less thing to worry about.

When my daughter got married, she got the Denby stoneware in black. She didn't get china because her MIL has three sets of china and wants to give one to her. I do think Denby is pretty trendy and will look dated in 10 years. But, it's also just as expensive as formal china and I would have a really hard time justifying replacing it if I owned it.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that those formal dinners I imagined when I got married never materialized. I ended up with dishes I never use and I just replaced the formal living room furniture that was too stuffy and uncomfortable for anyone to use. Go for what makes you comfortable and fits your lifestyle as it is now. If you need/want more formal in the future, deal with it in the future.

Edited to add:  I like plain, basic wine glasses when I have a glass of wine.  I think the fancy crystal is one of those things I saw as a necessity in 1989 that I'm glad I didn't get in 1989.

I do nothing about china. In my world it is a waste of money to buy because it will never be used. I have a set of fairly plain corelle that can be dressed up as far as I will ever dress up a table. Since your son is 18 I know you are older than 20. Realistically, how often have you hosted a formal dinner? Use that as the guide for it you really need china or not.

Do people use china and crystal anymore? I have had china for 22 years (used only twice because it has to be hand washed). I would not waste money on either.

In 20 years of marriage, I have hosted all kinds of events. I have never used china in any of them. My grandmother's gold rimmed fancy stuff is packed properly sitting in my garage. I would never part with it but I have no desire to use it either.

I have a collection of white ironstone, red transferware, blue willow, and aqua handmade plates. We almost never use paper...real plates are my delight...but China is just overkill in my opinion.

I am another who has no use for fine china - not able to go into the dishwasher being a big part of it. There are so many other lovely sets that are nice to look at, nice to eat, not as expensive, and can go in the dishwasher. 

As as for crystal, it certainly is great to drink from, and I would enjoy crystal glasses as long as they are plain. I would have no use for cut crystal.

Yes! I love using china and crystal. It makes any service look so pretty. My most frequent use of china and crystal is formal afternoon tea. There's nothing like serving tea from silver into lovely, thin china cups. I used to be all about the modern, heavy stuff but now I find myself enjoying the beauty of turn of the century china.

The hate for china on this thread kind of makes me mad. It's so beautiful, why not use it?

I am slowly gathering all the "persnickety accoutrements". I am working towards having the traditional 8 course meal, with all the different plates and forks and all the nonsense. I aim to set the table for a traditional Victorian multi-course meal.

I do love the "persnickety accoutrements" of tea services. I just recently acquired a silver sugar bowl and creamer. I am working towards the full silver tea service. Sigh. I need to serve afternoon tea one day soon.

Okay. Fair point. But why only use china for formal events? Why not use it for Sunday meals or even regular meals? We put some china in our daily rotation and it just makes things feel so much prettier and special. I don't know. I guess I don't keep it for only formal occasions. It used to be that Sunday dinner was formal occasion enough, so I suppose I go from that (though not always dinner on Sundays). Sometimes I think I was born in the wrong era.

But yes, this thread is about what the OP wants to do. Does she need a formal and informal set? No, there is no need, but I think it would be nice to have.

I've never had Denby's stuff, but if it's for everyday... why not change it out when you get bored of it. I do that all the time. Give away the boring ugly stuff and get something new. That's so much fun.

As for the crystal, I would say yes get it. Everything tastes better in crystal! But maybe wait until you're settled into your house before ordering.

I chose my pattern in the 70s, and have a full set of china. I don't use it much but every single piece means a great deal to me, because each piece was a gift from either my mother or my grandmother.

I don't have good china or crystal. I use my Fiestaware for everyday and for special occasions. I do have nice Oneida flatware (stainless, not sterling) that I use for special things and I use my holiday Pfaltzgraff from Thanksgiving until New Years. That being said, I do covet some nice crystal. Even water seems to taste better in a nice crystal glass.

I'd love to be on your guest list.

I have never had an urge for real china. For formal occasions, I have a a set of glass plates that work very well. And they were cheap. Break one? Just go buy another glass plate. NBD.

As it happens, I was just in a thrift store run by a local hospice talking to the manager. I noted that  the place was chockablock full of full formal china sets. The manager told me that they were donations by people in their 50s and up who said they never used them. I thought they were overpriced in the sense that I doubt the typical thrift store customer has $550 in her pocket to buy a china set. 

Most of my china is displayed in the china cabinet and is never used. I have three beautiful services for eight - two inherited, one received as a wedding gift from the company where I worked, and one service for twelve. I also have crystal which is stored in a cupboard and again never used. I do love china teacups, just because they remind me of having afternoon tea with my mom, but the tea itself is made in my old brown betty teapot.

We use fiesta for everyday and most of the entertaining we do. I love the look of a formal table, but not the work involved in hand-washing the dishes and putting them up afterward. I also don't want to have to hunt down replacements if something gets broken.



Because I'm the only one who would appreciate it, and it's not worth the work and nagging involved to use it just for my own pleasure. Most of the guests I have care more about the food itself than the way it's presented, and they are far more likely to appreciate sturdy dishes they don't have to worry about breaking. Even informal family dinners at our house usually involve cooking for at least ten people; at Thanksgiving and other holidays it's more like eighty to one hundred. That's tiring enough with having to worry about hand-washing everything afterward, or fussing at the kids about how to do it correctly when they are used to just putting everything in the dishwasher.