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Post by queenofshoes on Jul 26, 2014 23:14:19 GMT
It depends on what they did, and if you are able to avoid them. One off dd's friends and her parents tried to get my dd expelled from school for something that was an accident. They failed, and I was ready to never speak to them again. Unfortunately that friend and dd are both school cheerleaders and avoiding is really not an option. So I choose to be distant and removed from that family. In mu opinion they are not to be trusted, however my dd has decided to make up with this child and continue to be friends. I tried to talk her out of it, but she was not swayed. Trust me when I say I have my eye on that friend.
So I say cut them loose if you are able, if not be cordially distant.
Lesa
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Post by ~summer~ on Jul 26, 2014 23:15:16 GMT
If what they did wasn't illegal, forgive them and move on. If you miss them then be friends again.
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joelise
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,649
Jul 1, 2014 6:33:14 GMT
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Post by joelise on Jul 26, 2014 23:30:32 GMT
I would speak to them and say what you have said here. I believe everyone deserves a second chance, if they don't acknowledge or understand why you are upset then that is the time to move on.
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IPeaFreely
Full Member
Posts: 389
Location: Castle Frankenstein
Jun 26, 2014 8:32:27 GMT
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Post by IPeaFreely on Jul 26, 2014 23:44:31 GMT
This thread is useless without pictures.
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Post by peasapie on Jul 26, 2014 23:51:18 GMT
This thread is useless without pictures. haha I concur!
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msliz
Drama Llama
The Procrastinator
Posts: 6,419
Jun 26, 2014 21:32:34 GMT
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Post by msliz on Jul 26, 2014 23:53:05 GMT
We have some friends who treated us wrong about a month ago. We haven't spoken to them since but our kids have talked through social media. We've only known them for about 14 months. I don't want to get into what happen, but they did us wrong. What would you do if you really liked someone but they did you wrong? I really miss them but don't know what to do. Should I not talk to them ever again or call them and try to talk things out. I don't want to be treated this way ever again through. It not only hurt me and my husband but it hurt my kids too. What was their attitude a month ago when all this happened? I assume you had a conversation with them then? Did they own what they did, or did they claim there was a misunderstanding? Did they shrug and say "oh well, not my problem"? Are they aware of how hard this has affected you and your family? For me, it's about more than just "what happened." It about their perspective on what happened.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 6, 2024 8:21:17 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2014 0:13:41 GMT
This thread is useless without pictures. Or details.
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Anita
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,702
Location: Kansas City -ish
Jun 27, 2014 2:38:58 GMT
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Post by Anita on Jul 27, 2014 0:48:46 GMT
Is this the pea version of vaguebooking?
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 6, 2024 8:21:17 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2014 0:58:09 GMT
Technically, I should go find the vaguebooking thread and put this there. But, eh. . . vaguebooking was mentioned
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Post by turangaleela on Jul 27, 2014 0:58:58 GMT
Is this the pea version of vaguebooking? I thought this, too!
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Post by fkawitchypea on Jul 27, 2014 1:03:41 GMT
I agree with everyone else....without an idea of what the wrong was, it's hard to give advice. There are certain things that are dealbreakers for me. If it was one of those things, I would just move on. If it was within my power to forgive and forget, I would.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 6, 2024 8:21:17 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2014 1:25:42 GMT
Am I the only one with the lyrics to "(Hey Won't You Play) Another Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Song" by B.J. Thomas running through my head now?
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Post by brina on Jul 27, 2014 1:33:48 GMT
Am I the only one with the lyrics to "(Hey Won't You Play) Another Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Song" by B.J. Thomas running through my head now? I was just about to post, "write a country song"
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 6, 2024 8:21:17 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2014 1:34:31 GMT
Darnit Just Lizzy....now that song is going to be in my head the rest of the night!
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Post by ceepea on Jul 27, 2014 1:35:35 GMT
Again, it depends on what they did. Do they know they hurt you? Could it have been a misunderstanding or someone trying to make a joke? How were your kids hurt? I am guessing you mean hurt like in hurt feelings not physical harm?? Decide if they are worth talking to again or not. If so, try talking it out.
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Post by theboydbunch on Jul 27, 2014 1:40:01 GMT
Is this the pea version of vaguebooking? LOL
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 6, 2024 8:21:17 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2014 1:51:55 GMT
Darnit Just Lizzy....now that song is going to be in my head the rest of the night! You're welcome!
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Post by nantini on Jul 27, 2014 1:55:56 GMT
I'll buy a vowel for 10.00.
Seriously, you need to tell us some details. You know how it goes... One day a guy who I'll call B, called my friend G who's sister in law is little g to say that her sister L saw little g ...
Like that, no names just info.
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NoWomanNoCry
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,856
Jun 25, 2014 21:53:42 GMT
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Post by NoWomanNoCry on Jul 27, 2014 1:59:03 GMT
I have a feeling whatever this issue is I'm sure hurt you and obviously your upset about it but the reason you don't want to go into details is because when it comes down to it people won't think it's that big of a deal and just tell you to get over it. Which may sting. Just asking something like this and not giving NO info is kind of pointless in my opinion. If I'm off base then I apologize in advance.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jul 27, 2014 2:20:11 GMT
Even without additional info, I'll give my opinion. If this couple did your family wrong intentionally, I would not try to make up with them. If it was totally accidental, then maybe I would make up. But truthfully, I just have no patience for anyone that hurts my kids. I don't think I am a big enough person to let it go. And sometimes that is okay. Sometimes it is enough to admit that how you feel is how you feel, and it is enough of a reason to do as you wish.
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Post by AngieandSnoopy on Jul 27, 2014 2:26:24 GMT
Am I the only one with the lyrics to "(Hey Won't You Play) Another Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Song" by B.J. Thomas running through my head now? Thanks a lot Lizzy! I'm with everyone else, I don't know what they did so it is hard to tell what I would do or should be done.
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J u l e e
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,531
Location: Cincinnati
Jun 28, 2014 2:50:47 GMT
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Post by J u l e e on Jul 27, 2014 2:34:14 GMT
What would you do if you really liked someone but they did you wrong? I really miss them but don't know what to do. Should I not talk to them ever again or call them and try to talk things out. I don't want to be treated this way ever again through. I don't think we really need the details, because whatever it was would affect each of us differently anyway. I think the best thing to do in a situation where you like and miss someone is to talk it out. They might not have a clue. But they do need to hear how you were hurt and you can figure out what can happen next based on how they respond.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 6, 2024 8:21:17 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jul 27, 2014 3:45:17 GMT
Hmm...I'm interested to know the story too. But since it's not forthcoming here's my opinion. If someone "does me wrong" enough for me to be hurt and not to talk to them for a month? They are not true friends. They aren't the type of people I'd like to be around. And I especially would not want my kids to see me treated badly by others who are my supposed friends.
I can talk to my kids about friendships and boundaries and how you allow people to treat you until I am blue in the face. But I'd rather show my kids by example. I would walk away and not turn back.
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Post by heartcat on Jul 27, 2014 11:15:31 GMT
I agree that first it would make a difference whether it was intentional or unintentional. Then it would depend on whether or not they were aware they had 'hurt' us and how they had responded to that.
If what they did was something that indicated something about their characters, that I would not like or respect, and I had seen signs of similar behaviour towards others, I wouldn't bother trying to save the friendship.
If what they did seemed out of character for them, I might try to talk to them about it.
I guess the big questions for me are whether or not they are aware of how you are feeling, and how they have reacted to that. That would help deciding what I might do in a similar situation.
On the surface though, if someone hurt me and my whole family, and seemed happy to let the friendship go and were not taking steps themselves to work things out, I'd probably figure it was better to move on.
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anniebygaslight
Drama Llama
I'd love a cup of tea. #1966
Posts: 7,402
Location: Third Rock from the sun.
Jun 28, 2014 14:08:19 GMT
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Post by anniebygaslight on Jul 27, 2014 11:39:27 GMT
Can't be that earth shattering, as the OP hasn't revisited the thread to absorb the pea wisdom and we are well onto the second page.
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Country Ham
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,314
Jun 25, 2014 19:32:08 GMT
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Post by Country Ham on Jul 27, 2014 12:14:18 GMT
Maybe what you think done me wrong, really isn't.... That's probably why she will not say. It will become a thread more about why she shouldn't of been bothered in the first place. I do wonder if no information was shared because it was a minor slight maybe that was allowed to fester? You can make it work. Apparently your kids at least have moved on since they are in social media contact. You call your friend, invite her over for coffee and you tell her that you were hurt. You talk it out, you move on.
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Post by judy on Jul 27, 2014 12:20:34 GMT
It depends on the details of what they did. If you can get past that, then I'd want to have a heart to heart with them to discuss what happened. If you see that they've realized their mistake, genuinely feel sorry and that it won't happen again, I would then consider resuming friendship.
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Post by transprntbutterfly on Jul 27, 2014 12:29:13 GMT
I need more information before I can respond. Some things are unforgivable while others can be resolved by talking them out. Without more detail it is impossible for me to say.
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Post by Sassy Sabrina SWZ on Jul 27, 2014 12:41:36 GMT
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Post by Sam on Jul 27, 2014 12:48:58 GMT
I'm not sure it is - that reads, to me, like another set of issues with different friends.
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