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Post by darkangel090260 on May 26, 2016 1:13:03 GMT
OK, I have had M in daycare for 2 days. Since then he has not eat much of the launch I pack from him. He has came home thirsty and tiered due to not taking a nap at all. Plus he has came home with 3 bruises from there.
We are talking about a child who eat everything is not picky at all . But he has low verbal and only says a few words. (yes we are working it people on this problem). I am thinking thing are going on at the day care.
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moodyblue
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Post by moodyblue on May 26, 2016 1:16:14 GMT
2 days? That's not very long for him to adjust to new routines. He may be too busy looking at everyone and everything to settle down to a nap or to eat his lunch.
I'd just ask the people there how he's doing. This is a big change for him.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 26, 2016 1:16:25 GMT
I think 2 days is WAY to short of a time span for him to be accustomed to the change in his routine. He is having to learn to eat with other kids around so he may be more interested in watching them than in eating. It is also more interesting to watch the other kids than to take a nap.
Bruises are a normal part of toddler play.
Give him a month or two to adjust.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 26, 2016 1:17:37 GMT
Agree 2 days is not a long enough time measurement. I'd at least give it a few weeks and some feedback from the workers/teachers.
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Post by Deleted on May 26, 2016 1:21:50 GMT
I've never had a child in day care so I can't offer any advice on that. But I am a firm believer in a mother's instinct.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 26, 2016 1:27:03 GMT
What is his MOOD when you pick him up?
Is he happily playing? Is he acting withdrawn? Is he being overly aggressive and acting out at home?
While I do believe in mother's instinct to a degree I also know it can be wrong especially if mom has something to gain from following it. If mom would rather not work and can blame it on not finding reliable day care because her "mothers instinct" said something was wrong then it wasn't mothers instinct.
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Post by Skellinton on May 26, 2016 1:33:29 GMT
Has he ever been in daycare before? Is this a home daycare or a center? Do they have snack time? How old is he? Is he tired from not napping or just because he is more active at day care? Where are the bruises? I don't recall ever seeing a small child of the boy persuasion without bruises before. I totally understand mother's instinct, but 2 days is pretty quick to make a judgement without any real signs for concern.
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Post by darkangel090260 on May 26, 2016 1:34:44 GMT
yesterday when i got him he was super quite and when we left he started hitting and head butting. he did not go in today since he was running a fever and got sick last night.
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psiluvu
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Post by psiluvu on May 26, 2016 1:38:35 GMT
Maybe his behaviour is because he was coming down with something and has nothing at all to do with the daycare
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Post by boatymcboatface on May 26, 2016 1:39:11 GMT
It's very normal for kids to take some time to adjust to a new place and routine. He may be too stimulated during the day to eat or nap and new playmates may be the reason for bruises I would ask the daycare provider what she sees in your child and what you can do to make the transition easier I can't say there is no problem just that what you are seeing may be a normal transition to a new child care arrangement.
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johnnysmom
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Post by johnnysmom on May 26, 2016 1:42:40 GMT
Way to soon to worry. Kids play hard at school (daycare) being tired and bruised is totally normal. He's too busy to worry about eating, he may level out soon or he may never eat as much at school as he does at home (which, iirc, was quite a bit), there just so much more going on there to worry about food. You might ask his teacher if the kids have water bottles but aside from that just keep asking how his day was, keep the lines of communication open and you'll probably feel more at ease soon.
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Post by finally~a~mama on May 26, 2016 1:46:41 GMT
Is it an at home daycare or a center? How long is he there for? All day? Half day? Has he been there before or it's completely new these 2 days? Where are the bruises?
My toddler goes to an in-home daycare every once in awhile when I need a day off for an appointment or whatever. She rarely eats more than a few bites of food there & is quieter there than she is at home. So that wouldn't necessarily worry me. Also, DD is active & always has bruises on her shins & it would not be uncommon for her to have one on her arm (or head - she can be a bit of a daredevil LOL).
Mama's instincts are important, but it's a little tough to judge with only 2 days. It sounds like a brand new situation for him so he is going to act different there for a bit and he isn't going to immediately adjust to it. Think about it this way.. if you start a new job aren't you a little nervous at first and act a little different than your norm (be quiet, talk too much at nervousness, etc.) as you assess the new place & people? Doesn't necessarily mean anything bad just means you have to figure it out & get comfortable. Same for a child.
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Post by bigbundt on May 26, 2016 1:47:05 GMT
It may be something or it may be nothing. The only thing that is for sure is that two days is not long enough to determine if a daycare is a good fit or not. If he is now sick, that might explain his smaller appetite the last few days. Quiet and head butting (acting out) may be because he is tired from not napping because he is checking out his new environment. Even when my oldest moved rooms within the daycare she was in (infant to one-year to two-year) there was an adjustment period of about a month or so. And in case no one has told you, be prepared for him to be sick a lot now that he is around a bunch of new kids. It is 100% normal no matter how much they clean or sanitize everything. The bonus is that he will have awesome immunities by the time he starts school!
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Post by scrapsotime on May 26, 2016 1:52:24 GMT
Former daycare provider. It is not unusual for a child to not eat much or nap in the first weeks of daycare.
I would ask the daycare provider if he is hitting or head butting while he is in her care. My first thought, if he is only doing this with you, is this is how he is showing his anger that he is being left in an unfamiliar place, especially since you said he is pretty much nonverbal. This is also normal and should stop when he is more familiar with his surroundings.
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Post by bostonmama on May 26, 2016 2:03:26 GMT
yesterday when i got him he was super quite and when we left he started hitting and head butting. he did not go in today since he was running a fever and got sick last night. IIRC, he is on the autism spectrum, yes? Or you've at least mentioned your concerns about him having autism. Being in a new environment for hours a day is a huge adjustment for any child, but especially for a child on the autism spectrum.
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Post by darkangel090260 on May 26, 2016 2:06:50 GMT
no he is not on the autism spectrum. He has been tested. he is the first of our kids going to daycare and i am worried the bruising on his upper thigh on the out side.
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blue tulip
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Post by blue tulip on May 26, 2016 2:10:26 GMT
2 days is not enough time to make a judgement on this, IMO. i'm assuming you checked this place out before you chose it, right? and it seemed ok then? he's going to take time, weeks, to adjust to the routine, the kids, the different environment. personally I wouldn't worry about the bruise at his point either, kids are rough and play and in daycare there are lots of bumps and bruises between them as they do this. take a deep breath, voice your concerns to the provider if you want, but give it a little time. ![:)](//storage.proboards.com/5645536/images/MNrJDkDuSwqIMVw33MdD.jpg)
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Mary Kay Lady
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Post by Mary Kay Lady on May 26, 2016 2:20:08 GMT
How old is he? Does the daycare have cameras that you can log onto? Do you provide his lunch or is it provided by the daycare?
He's only been there 2 days total? If yes, then that's not nearly enough time to adjust to the new surroundings and routine.
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johnnysmom
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Post by johnnysmom on May 26, 2016 2:25:54 GMT
no he is not on the autism spectrum. He has been tested. he is the first of our kids going to daycare and i am worried the bruising on his upper thigh on the out side. Sounds like he probably fell on a toy or something. Is he the type to just get up and keep playing or to cry when he falls? Chance are the teacher didn't even realize it happened or didn't realize it's left a mark. Just ask. I was never shy to ask (not accuse! ask) about a strange mark on my kid. Every time it was a non-issue (they always called me if it was something strange like my 5mo's first week of daycare when he was bit on the nose by an older baby kissing him.....I can laugh now ![;)](//storage.proboards.com/5645536/images/Q_m8lDOvc_3Le3r1GKdf.jpg) ). Anyhow, you have to keep the communication open, that minute or two talking to the teacher at pick up/drop off is important and teachers of young kids truly don't mind (just keep it brief, they're busy).
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Post by darkangel090260 on May 26, 2016 2:26:05 GMT
i take all his food and he is almost 3.
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Post by Skellinton on May 26, 2016 2:29:12 GMT
A bruise on the outside of his thigh could be frfalling or running into a table, chair or piece of playground equipment. I agree the reduced appetite is probably related to being sick. I work with kids and I know we and the parents can generally tell a day or two before a child is sick that they are coming down with something because they have a reduced appetite, are fatigued, generally quieter all around. I think you are probably very anxious about daycare and might be projecting a bit. I know it is hard, but daycare can be a great part of a kid's life. Give it more time. It will get easier for you.
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Post by myboysnme on May 26, 2016 2:44:25 GMT
no he is not on the autism spectrum. He has been tested. he is the first of our kids going to daycare and i am worried the bruising on his upper thigh on the out side. Ok this sounds harsh, but why did you choose this child care option? He's gone to it 2 days, now he's home already. Does he never get bruised at your house? What do you really suspect? Another kid? The teacher whacking him on the thigh? Because posters here are generally telling you your kid is responding normally and that 3 year olds do get bruises. Are you waiting for the majority to say," Oh my God! Call the police! He is clearly being abused!" To tell you the truth, if I was your child's caregiver and you were suspecting abuse or neglect after 2 days I would pray you would go somewhere else. Or better yet, stay home so when he gets bruised you can blame your own child care abilities. I know he's only 3 and you have to trust your instincts, but you also have to attach logic and reason to your instincts. If you have reasons you don't really want him in day care then take him out. Because the greatest influence on your child's adjustment is YOU. And if you think he doesn't pick up on your apprehension, think again.
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Post by iamkristinl16 on May 26, 2016 3:21:15 GMT
2 days? That's not very long for him to adjust to new routines. He may be too busy looking at everyone and everything to settle down to a nap or to eat his lunch. I'd just ask the people there how he's doing. This is a big change for him. I agree. Also, are they feeding him there? I have never heard of a daycare where the parent has to provide the food.
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Post by darkangel090260 on May 26, 2016 3:59:08 GMT
a few around here you bring there food.
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Post by Deleted on May 26, 2016 6:03:34 GMT
Are you able to get him into a headstart program? That would be better than daycare.
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Grom Pea
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Post by Grom Pea on May 26, 2016 6:35:58 GMT
I'm with my ds 90% of the time and he gets bruises like that, where I have no idea how it happened. But with my son who was very non verbal until 4, which is recently, I was afraid to really have anyone watch him for any length of time because he cannot advocate for himself. Even now if something were to happen I'm not certain he could tell me. I will tell you that he was about to get sick at school this past December and he kept saying go home and I thought he was just bored at school because he had already received his present from Santa and wanted to leave. I made him stay so I could help clean up from the party as all parents pitch in and he vomited right before we were going to leave. My point is that even though he had some words it was hard to know why he wanted to go home. Your ds could be upset about going to day care or just trying to let you know he was feeling sick. Personally I couldn't send my son to a daycare if I couldn't communicate with him, so this is why I attend a co-op preschool with him. Even though I'm there with him all the time I still couldn't figure out what he was saying so I'd be hesitant to leave him in an environment where he may not be able to get help he needs. Only you truly know your son, so it's hard for someone else to say what's best, but if you need to keep him in day care it doesn't sound too suspicious, but for me personally, if I don't have to leave my son in the care of someone else, I would wait until he was more verbal so I could find out what happened in his day, even if it was positive things. Can your daycare seems a report card of sorts home so you know how your son's day is going and you feel more confident?
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Post by katiejane on May 26, 2016 6:51:20 GMT
I hsvr mo idea what the registration process is there for qualified childcare providers. But having worked on childcare 2 days is really short time to expect him to adjust. It takes children time to make relationships and settle. Our setting only provided snack and kids had their lunch from home. I would always tell mums to pack a sandwich made with one slice of bread and a piece of fruit for the first week as they are so distracted and busy adjusting that eating really slows down. Brusing in group play is normal. But it it was on his wrists or trunk I would note it as being unsual. Napping in a new environment will be difficult too. And at 3 alot of kids woukd be dropping their nap. He might be transitioning out of naps, especially as he is in a busy environment with lots of new thing to explore. I believe in mothers instinct and if you really aren't happy you might need to move him. But first talk to the staff about how he is settling. They will be able to give you a better idea of his mood while there. But cranky, not eating or sleeping difficulty could be done to coming down with an illness.
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Post by gar on May 26, 2016 7:05:27 GMT
Was M ravenous when he got home? That would tell you whether he was missing out on food or whether he wasn't hungry because he was coming down with something. And if he hasn't eaten he won't have as much energy....and napping in a new place can be difficult at first. Give it a little time
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Post by Deleted on May 26, 2016 7:15:49 GMT
Has he never had a bruise while in your care?
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Post by darkangel090260 on May 26, 2016 7:42:34 GMT
Right now he has to go and I really do not like him going. Yes he has gotten bruise in the passed but normally i can kinda figure out when it happened and never as many as he has right now. One on his face like a tear drop the two on his legs. I will give him a few more weeks to see what happen in the next few weeks. Once his fever goes away.
He did eat when he got home Monday and on Tuesday he refused to eat or snuggle with anyone
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