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Post by BlueDiamond on May 30, 2016 15:36:03 GMT
*UPDATE* I just got a text from my daughter. He's gone. I am beyond devastated.
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I don't know what to do or what to think.
DD's ex-boyfriend was found hanged yesterday by his family. He was rushed to the hospital, but the prognosis is not good. His mother is letting his friends know that they should come down to the hospital to see him, as this may be the last time.
I cannot even imagine what his family is going through. His mother was worried about him, and I guess they had him in the hospital sometime last week for fear of what he would do, but I don't know the specifics.
My DD is only 15. This is so much for her to deal with. Long story short: they were dating, she found out he cheated, they broke up, he started hanging out with not-so-good new friends, got involved with drugs, still wanted her back. DD stayed in touch with him, and was even texting with him yesterday.
So much to take in. I am beyond devastated. I am going to find someone for my daughter to talk to on a regular basis because I can't even imagine.
I so want, need to talk to someone but I don't know who. I'm sure most of my friends are busy with family today, and I don't necessarily want to burden them with this heaviness. But I'm dying inside and I don't know what to do.
If you made it this far, thanks for reading.
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Post by jenjie on May 30, 2016 15:42:10 GMT
Awwww I am so sorry. Yes definitely have your dd talk to someone.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 8, 2024 4:42:34 GMT
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Post by Deleted on May 30, 2016 15:42:51 GMT
Omg, I am so sorry. I can't imagine. That poor family, your daughter, everyone. Just tragic.
I'd suggest taking your daughter to a counselor, even if he makes it (but especially if he doesn't). Teen girls are so good at "if I had just - ______, this wouldn't have happened." It's not logical or right, but they often blame themselves for thing they couldn't control.
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Post by mnmloveli on May 30, 2016 15:46:58 GMT
Sooo sorry for your situation. Does your daughters school have a Counselor ? That might be a good place to start. I'll keep your family in my thoughts & prayers.
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Post by BlueDiamond on May 30, 2016 15:47:05 GMT
Thank you jenjie. Yes, @busypea, this is something that I do not want to happen! I'm going to see mine soon, too. His mother had called me last week stating her concerns, and asked me to call him and talk to him. I was never able to get a hold of him. I am feeling so horrible about this! My DD said he probably wouldn't have listened to me, but what if?
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Post by BlueDiamond on May 30, 2016 15:48:39 GMT
mnmloveli - yes, I am planning on calling her school counselor tomorrow. I do not want to give info out that the family hasn't yet, so I don't know how to word it. Maybe I'll just inquire about grief counseling on the chance of something happening.
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Post by BlueDiamond on May 30, 2016 15:49:32 GMT
Does anyone know of a hotline or something similar to those that help with suicidal people? I really need to talk to someone and I don't know who.
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flute4peace
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,757
Jul 3, 2014 14:38:35 GMT
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Post by flute4peace on May 30, 2016 15:55:32 GMT
Omg, I am so sorry. I can't imagine. That poor family, your daughter, everyone. Just tragic. I'd suggest taking your daughter to a counselor, even if he makes it (but especially if he doesn't). Teen girls are so good at "if I had just - ______, this wouldn't have happened." It's not logical or right, but they often blame themselves for thing they couldn't control. This would be extremely difficult for even an adult to process, for a 15 yr old girl I can't even imagine.
I wonder if a crisis line could help give you some advice or even talk to her, until you can get her in to see someone. Please keep her close to you.
What a devastating situation
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flute4peace
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,757
Jul 3, 2014 14:38:35 GMT
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Post by flute4peace on May 30, 2016 15:58:52 GMT
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Post by BlueDiamond on May 30, 2016 16:01:51 GMT
Thank you flute4peace. That is exactly what I needed. DD is on her way to the hospital right now, and DH will be taking other DD and sleepover friend out for a while, so I will be calling.
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Post by christine58 on May 30, 2016 16:06:54 GMT
Thank you jenjie . Yes, @busypea , this is something that I do not want to happen! I'm going to see mine soon, too. His mother had called me last week stating her concerns, and asked me to call him and talk to him. I was never able to get a hold of him. I am feeling so horrible about this! My DD said he probably wouldn't have listened to me, but what if? You have to try hard to not play the "what if" scenario. One thing I have learned over the years is that we have no control over other's actions. Please let your DD's school know this happened especially if they attended the same one. They can put a crisis team in place.
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AnotherPea
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,969
Jan 4, 2015 1:47:52 GMT
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Post by AnotherPea on May 30, 2016 16:10:17 GMT
I'm so sorry
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Post by chirpingcricket on May 30, 2016 16:13:58 GMT
I am so sorry. I don't have any way to help you, but someone else gave you a link to hotlines, so I really hope that helps. I just didn't want to read, feel bad for you, and not say anything. I am just so, so sorry.
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Post by wiipii2 on May 30, 2016 16:14:46 GMT
There are lots of links in here - this is the list that Postsecret has posted on their site. Suicide Prevention HotlinesI am so sorry you are all having to face this.
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Post by Patter on May 30, 2016 16:15:07 GMT
Oh my goodness. So sad. I am so sorry!
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peabay
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,895
Jun 25, 2014 19:50:41 GMT
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Post by peabay on May 30, 2016 16:19:22 GMT
Do NOT be afraid to use the word suicide with your daughter and talk to her about suicidal feelings. Tell her that if she EVER thinks of thoughts of harming herself to speak with you and you can get her help. Some parents fear if they mention it they are somehow suggesting it and nothing could be further from the truth. Let her know you are open to talking or finding someone for her to talk with if she doesn't want to talk to you. That poor thing - that's so much to deal with. I'm so sorry for her and for his family. So sad.
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valleyview
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,816
Jun 27, 2014 18:41:26 GMT
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Post by valleyview on May 30, 2016 16:20:41 GMT
Oh, I'm so sorry! This is so hard for teens, and I'm glad that you're seeking help for your daughter. You both need some good support.
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Post by BlueDiamond on May 30, 2016 16:23:18 GMT
christine58 - I know, but it's so hard not to! And I don't know if I should let the family be the one to inform the school?
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Post by BlueDiamond on May 30, 2016 16:29:26 GMT
Thank you AnotherPea and chirpingcricket and Patter and valleyview. wiipii2 - thank you for the link. I will certainly check it out. peabay - we have had the suicide discussion before. I have stressed that so highly with her! I didn't tell her, but I have dealt with suicidal thoughts myself, both as a young adult and not too long ago. But after losing my father, everything changed. DH just mentioned that she'll be dealing with this for the rest of her life. I cannot even fathom. I would not wish this on anyone.
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TankTop
Pearl Clutcher
Refupea #1,871
Posts: 4,831
Location: On the couch...
Jun 28, 2014 1:52:46 GMT
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Post by TankTop on May 30, 2016 16:40:55 GMT
I am not sure what to say. My heart is breaking for everyone involved.
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Post by BlueDiamond on May 30, 2016 16:53:12 GMT
Thank you TankTop. I've never gone through anything like this before. I'm sure our family will be dealing with this for a long time to come.
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Mary Kay Lady
Pearl Clutcher
PeaNut 367,913 Refupea number 1,638
Posts: 3,082
Jun 27, 2014 4:11:36 GMT
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Post by Mary Kay Lady on May 30, 2016 17:06:20 GMT
Thank you jenjie . Yes, @busypea , this is something that I do not want to happen! I'm going to see mine soon, too. His mother had called me last week stating her concerns, and asked me to call him and talk to him. I was never able to get a hold of him. I am feeling so horrible about this! My DD said he probably wouldn't have listened to me, but what if? It's the "what if's" that are the hardest. I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't even begin to imagine how hard this must be on both you and your daughter (((HUGS))) I would most definitely seek counseling for both you and your daughter.
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Post by jeremysgirl on May 30, 2016 17:20:25 GMT
I can only imagine how traumatic this must be for you. Hugs for your DD.
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Post by Miss Ang on May 30, 2016 17:21:39 GMT
That is so sad and I am so sorry. Hugs and prayers for your daughter and her ex boyfriend and family.
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Post by scrapmaven on May 30, 2016 17:24:19 GMT
You made a great call by having your dd see a therapist. This will profoundly affect all of you and a therapist will help your dd process all of this in a healthy way. This is such a sad situation.
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Post by BlueDiamond on May 30, 2016 17:44:35 GMT
*UPDATE*
I just got a text from my daughter. He's gone. I am beyond devastated.
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calgal08
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,519
Jun 27, 2014 15:43:46 GMT
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Post by calgal08 on May 30, 2016 17:46:44 GMT
I can't even begin to imagine. What a great Mom you are being pro-active and immediately looking for help for your dd.
I'm so very sorry you all have to experience this.
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Post by bc2ca on May 30, 2016 17:47:42 GMT
I am so sorry .
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Post by scrapmaven on May 30, 2016 17:50:06 GMT
I'm so very sorry.
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valleyview
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,816
Jun 27, 2014 18:41:26 GMT
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Post by valleyview on May 30, 2016 17:54:48 GMT
Crying for you.
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