back to *pea*ality
Pearl Clutcher
Not my circus, not my monkeys ~refugee pea #59
Posts: 3,149
Jun 25, 2014 19:51:11 GMT
|
Post by back to *pea*ality on Aug 21, 2014 20:55:27 GMT
LavenderLayoutLady did anyone say anything to her? If I was standing there I would have said WTF is wrong with you?
|
|
azredhead
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,755
Jun 25, 2014 22:49:18 GMT
|
Post by azredhead on Aug 21, 2014 20:57:10 GMT
HUGS! Mean people do suck! I'm sorry.
|
|
|
Post by marmargirl on Aug 21, 2014 20:59:08 GMT
People who talk like that say a whole lot more about themselves than about anyone else. :angry:Bringing others down to feel better about who they are and their petty lives. Please don't let their comments affect the way you feel about yourself; you are clearly a better person than any one of them will ever be.
|
|
|
Post by 1lear on Aug 21, 2014 20:59:31 GMT
That's a horrible thing for somebody to say. I'm finding that the older I get, the more outspoken I've become against rude behavior. I'd probably respond "what did you just say?" just to make her repeat it.
|
|
|
Post by tracyarts on Aug 21, 2014 20:59:59 GMT
Whenever I hear stories like that I just have to shake my head. They have no idea. They are so hung up on their little preconceived notion of what is and is not desirable that they are oblivious to the fact that body size is not the big barrier to being "wanted" in a sexual or romantic context that they believe it to be.
|
|
|
Post by vicloo on Aug 21, 2014 21:00:53 GMT
So sorry you were embarrassed. Perhaps she learned something about keeping her prejudices to herself. No one wants to hear it.
|
|
|
Post by traceys on Aug 21, 2014 21:09:51 GMT
Wow. She's lovely......perhaps she's a little thirsty herself and just mad because there was competition around for whatever this picture event was.
|
|
J u l e e
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,531
Location: Cincinnati
Jun 28, 2014 2:50:47 GMT
|
Post by J u l e e on Aug 21, 2014 21:15:33 GMT
That was hateful. I'm so sorry you experienced that.
We have GOT to start speaking out against stuff like this - calling out the crap others have the nerve to say. I'd love to say I'd stand up with a WTF? and walk away, but I'm working on the incredulous stare and the, "I'm sorry, I must have missed what you said." I'm not often in the company of others who are so blatantly rude, but I have an extremely racist family member and get to practice this whenever I am subjected to him in social/family gatherings.
|
|
|
Post by sues on Aug 21, 2014 21:27:51 GMT
That's awful. I'm sorry.
|
|
brandy327
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,353
Jun 26, 2014 16:09:34 GMT
|
Post by brandy327 on Aug 21, 2014 21:28:04 GMT
Being overweight is not something to be 'ashamed' of. Even if someone is not happy with their current weight and/or choices that brought them to that point. Prejudice, discrimination, hatefulness, hurtfulness, dishonesty, disloyalty, meanness, unkindness, selfishness, lack of compassion and empathy for other human beings...actions and behaviours that impact negatively on the lives of other people....those are things to be ashamed of. Our weight does not define us or say anything about the kind of human beings we are. I read something one time that a friend who was doing through gastric bypass surgery posted on her facebook. "Yes, I have fat. But I am not 'fat'. I have skin too, and hair and teeth, but I am not any one of those things either.' It can be embarassing to be singled out that way (whether intentionally or not). The only one who should have felt ashamed by that woman's comment though is 'her'. It reflects on her character, and who she is. Not on who you are. {{Hugs}} I agree with so many of these posts...but Heartcat's takes the cake. What she said is spot on. That said, I totally have been in your position and it sucks ass. It's hard to think about in the moment because you're so embarrassed but you just have to keep telling yourself that she doesn't walk in your shoes, she knows nothing of your battles (weight or otherwise). People are SO quick to say thoughtless things. I'm VERY sensitive to weight related comments and try VERY hard not to judge for ANY reason. Anyway, sorry that happened. I will say that no matter how much you weigh, people will do and say things that make you feel bad. I've lost a lot of weight...but I'm still way overweight. People see me and I'm sure think, OMG, that fat bitch needs to lose weight. There are people like that everywhere...I just keep reminding myself of what I said above. They don't know my story...my life...my struggles. *I* know that I'm working hard to lose the weight and be healthy...and if instead of judging me they got to know me, they'd know that too. Hang in there!
|
|
|
Post by lovinlife on Aug 21, 2014 21:31:24 GMT
I'm sorry. ...people sucks sometimes
|
|
linda~lou
Pearl Clutcher
Keep calm and eat crumpets
Posts: 2,744
Location: Motown but my heart is in San Francisco
Jun 25, 2014 21:57:08 GMT
|
Post by linda~lou on Aug 21, 2014 21:41:11 GMT
I find that the people who criticize and find fault with other people are the ones most unhappy with themselves. They are so insecure that the only way they can feel better about themselves is to find fault in others. She is the one with issues, not you!!! Never ever feel ashamed. Love yourself as you should, she is the one that needs to find self worth, not you.
|
|
iluvpink
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,370
Location: Michigan
Jul 13, 2014 12:40:31 GMT
|
Post by iluvpink on Aug 21, 2014 21:49:35 GMT
I am so sorry. I'm pretty overweight too and that would sting.
|
|
|
Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Aug 21, 2014 21:58:36 GMT
LavenderLayoutLady did anyone say anything to her? If I was standing there I would have said WTF is wrong with you? No, they didn't. But neither did I. I think that they were either stunned and didn't know how to tell her she was rude, or maybe that is just how they talk. I didn't really know the people well.
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 10, 2024 6:22:06 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 21, 2014 22:03:53 GMT
Some people don't get that other people have feelings too. I am sorry
|
|
~Susan~
Pearl Clutcher
You need to check your boobs, mine tried to kill me!!!
Posts: 3,259
Jul 6, 2014 17:25:32 GMT
|
Post by ~Susan~ on Aug 21, 2014 22:16:07 GMT
I am amazed that some people think it is okay to belittle others because they don't fit their definition of normal, pretty, smart, etc. I am sorry that she made you feel bad about yourself.
|
|
|
Post by kimpossible on Aug 21, 2014 22:28:16 GMT
I think the people that heard her ugly comment were embarrassed for her, not you. THIS. 1000 times this. I couldn't agree more!
|
|
back to *pea*ality
Pearl Clutcher
Not my circus, not my monkeys ~refugee pea #59
Posts: 3,149
Jun 25, 2014 19:51:11 GMT
|
Post by back to *pea*ality on Aug 21, 2014 22:55:33 GMT
LavenderLayoutLady did anyone say anything to her? If I was standing there I would have said WTF is wrong with you? No, they didn't. But neither did I. I think that they were either stunned and didn't know how to tell her she was rude, or maybe that is just how they talk. I didn't really know the people well. I can understand how stunned you were but what I can't understand is why another adult didn't shut her up. Cross that group off your dance card!
|
|
purplebee
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,792
Jun 27, 2014 20:37:34 GMT
|
Post by purplebee on Aug 21, 2014 23:02:31 GMT
Well, it was totally obvious that her Mama didn't raise her right! Why people think that outright rudeness in a social situation is acceptable is beyond me. I too have weight to lose, and I am VERY sensitive about comments like that. SHE is the heifer, and an ignorant one at that.
LavenderLayoutlady, hold your head up, and know that you are a better person. Inner ugliness can and does negate outer beauty. Karma will eventually bite her skinny ass!
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 10, 2024 6:22:06 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 21, 2014 23:05:33 GMT
I hate bitches..and this fat girl would've called her ass out.
|
|
|
Post by hollymolly on Aug 21, 2014 23:08:10 GMT
I'm so sorry you had to be in the company of mean people. I know it doesn't always help, but people who say that have something about themselves that they hate. People who are truly happy, or even content, with themselves don't even think to say things like that.
|
|
mallie
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,253
Jul 3, 2014 18:13:13 GMT
|
Post by mallie on Aug 21, 2014 23:10:49 GMT
You can lose weight, but she'll probably never stop being a bitch.
|
|
|
Post by evnimom on Aug 21, 2014 23:34:03 GMT
I've been in your shoes - still am since I still have ways to go. I agree with everyone here; she has problems.
|
|
|
Post by I-95 on Aug 21, 2014 23:39:01 GMT
My hope for you is to gain enough confidence in yourself to give people like her a withering look and say *I'd rather be a heifer than a no-class bitch like you.*
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Oct 10, 2024 6:22:06 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 21, 2014 23:46:41 GMT
Some people just suck.
|
|
|
Post by mollycoddle on Aug 21, 2014 23:48:00 GMT
What a mean, ugly thing to say.
|
|
|
Post by Erica on Aug 21, 2014 23:51:14 GMT
Being you is all you need to worry about being. She on the other hand will get what's coming. They always do.
|
|
|
Post by Ryann on Aug 21, 2014 23:51:39 GMT
That says far more of the speaker than of you. Bitch. I'd like to say I'd have gotten up and punched her in her throat, but more likely I'd just sat there and felt embarrassed. I'm sorry you had to hear those hateful words.
|
|
|
Post by KikiPea on Aug 21, 2014 23:57:50 GMT
I'm so sorry. I have heard very hurtful fat comments in my life as well. It's a bad reflection of THEM, not you. I'm sorry you were embarrassed.
|
|
|
Post by Really Red on Aug 22, 2014 0:03:02 GMT
I'd like to think they didn't want to call more attention to what she said. Because I speak up at a lot of things, but in that situation, I'd be disgusted with the person who said it, but not call her out in order to not embarrass anyone further.
So sorry, Lavender. It's hard enough to deal with normal situations sometimes, but it sucks when you hear ugly stuff.
Maybe (I'd like to think) this lady has seen the real you and doesn't think of your weight one way or another? It doesn't excuse the comment, but it means that she doesn't think of you as the ugly things she said.
|
|