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Post by **GypsyGirl** on Dec 31, 2017 17:20:32 GMT
My in-laws are in their 80's now. They still grow their own produce every year and in the fall put up jars and jars of food. They are deeply involved in food storage, both grew up very, very poor and DH says they were quite poor until his pre-adolecence. He's the 6th of 7 children. So there are frugality issues deeply ingrained into their food issues. My MIL has preserved food in her basement that is 40 years old. It just gets pushed further back as each year's harvest fills in in front of it. They cannot possibly consume how much food they are putting up between the two of them. MIL is convinced that although the food may no longer taste or look as good, all the nutrients are still there and refuses to get rid of it because, "When things get dire, people will be hungry and they will eat it." She is preparing for some kind of apocalypse wherein food poisoning is more desirable than hunger. She honestly thinks that when she and FIL are gone, her 7 kids are going to come to the home and divvy up the food storage that is older than her (adult) grandchildren. In the meantime, all of them eye it with suspicion and I know they are going to back up a dumpster and it's all going to the dump. The sad thing is FIL knows it's too much and is trying to convince MIL they don't need a garden, or at least as big a garden, anymore. But she wont hear it. And he loves her, so they have a garden. Perhaps you could convince your in-laws to donate much of the surplus produce (fresh) to a local food bank? I would appeal to their knowledge of having done without and wanting to help others in a similar situation. Meanwhile they still have their garden and can up just a few jars of veggies.
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Post by mcscrapper on Dec 31, 2017 17:35:13 GMT
My dad and step-mother were a bit like this. She died 3 years ago and my siblings and I were helping him clean up and sort through some stuff. My SIL tackled the kitchen. Why on earth would some elderly folks need a Sam's Club membership is beyond me.... There were two ginormous, like major league baseball concession stand BIG, bottles of all ketchup and all sorts of other condiments. #10 cans of baked beans, and so much other stuff that expired YEARS prior. There were 2 #10 cans of Jif in there but my dad insisted he loved PB. He always has but not that much! He said he would eventually eat it all and I was like it would expire before it was consumed. I think we probably threw away 6 large trash bags full of expired and spoiled items from their kitchen. It made me ill to think they had been eating all of this. I guess people at this age are products of the Depression and it is pretty common. It isn't like they couldn't afford to go buy new stuff or replace stuff and they lived less than 1 mile from a little neighborhood grocery store and 3 miles from two or three huge grocery stores so convenience isn't a factor either. I don't what it is about those club stores but all sense of reason and clear thinking must have been left in the car.
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Post by Suziee2 on Dec 31, 2017 17:53:55 GMT
For the win? When one of dh's aunts passed away in the late 90's her kids found mayo from 1972 in the back of the fridge! My MIL was the same way with a lot of things. Her homemade canned goods..... no way would I eat that EVER.
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Post by eventhinker on Dec 31, 2017 18:00:11 GMT
I can't speak for my MIL and food, but at holidays all of us would do the "surreptitious looking at the bottom of soda cans" to see who had the most expired can. It was a fun party game
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Post by crazy4scraps on Dec 31, 2017 18:02:14 GMT
My dad and step-mother were a bit like this. She died 3 years ago and my siblings and I were helping him clean up and sort through some stuff. My SIL tackled the kitchen. Why on earth would some elderly folks need a Sam's Club membership is beyond me.... There were two ginormous, like major league baseball concession stand BIG, bottles of all ketchup and all sorts of other condiments. #10 cans of baked beans, and so much other stuff that expired YEARS prior. There were 2 #10 cans of Jif in there but my dad insisted he loved PB. He always has but not that much! He said he would eventually eat it all and I was like it would expire before it was consumed. I think we probably threw away 6 large trash bags full of expired and spoiled items from their kitchen. It made me ill to think they had been eating all of this. I guess people at this age are products of the Depression and it is pretty common. It isn't like they couldn't afford to go buy new stuff or replace stuff and they lived less than 1 mile from a little neighborhood grocery store and 3 miles from two or three huge grocery stores so convenience isn't a factor either. I don't what it is about those club stores but all sense of reason and clear thinking must have been left in the car. I think the reason why the club stores are appealing is because they can go once and think they won’t have to venture out again for a month. Once it starts to get harder for older folks to get out and about, they want to knock as much off of their to do list as they can and it may very well be easier to go to Costco or Sam’s once than it is to go to the smaller, closer grocery store every week.
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Post by malibou on Dec 31, 2017 18:04:15 GMT
Add my in-laws to the list. Dh told them several years ago that every time we eat there we all get tummy trouble, so we now bring food and cook it there for them. Dh also had to request that his dad no longer be involved with the washing of dishes as we all kept breaking things from them slipping out of our hands there was such a greasy film on them.
We've endured under cooked turkey more than once and don't get me started on all the food they have canned that is in the cellar.
This thread is making us sound like we all have married into the same family. Lol. I'm thrilled with all the new sisters-in-law I have.
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purplebee
Drama Llama
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Jun 27, 2014 20:37:34 GMT
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Post by purplebee on Dec 31, 2017 18:06:11 GMT
MIL was this way. Her fridge/kitchen was a nightmare and she had a stockpile of ancient home canned goods that could have poisoned the entire town.
But she was raised in poverty, and I'm sure that triggered her hoarder tendencies. Her life as a child and adolescent was incredibly hard, and I understand why she had to have so much stuff around her, even when her and FIL's life was quite comfortable.
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Deleted
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Sept 28, 2024 21:46:17 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 31, 2017 18:14:31 GMT
I'm laughing at this thread. I'm an "older" lady that has a few "expired" items in my pantry too. I was just talking to my husband about this in fact when I was making dinner the other night. I have a friend that throws out all her spices each January 1st and buys all new ones. I was looking at my spices, and I have a LOT of them. Some get used more than others!! But spices? Sometimes they lose a bit of their flavor, but every year? That would cost a fortune to replace every year. I replace when needed. I now buy them in bulk and put them in the cleaned containers I already have. I do buy new baking soda and baking powder before the expiration date, and if I use yeast, it's new! But cinnamon gets used until it's gone. (I probably go through that quite often though!!) As for canned goods, MOST things get used before the expiration dates--especially the acidic ones. I do have to go through the salad dressings in the fridge soon. I think there may be one or two in there that have expired!! I usually go through things in the frige before one of my son in laws comes for a visit!! haha!! He goes through their canned goods twice a year and throws out anything that is CLOSE to expiration date!! My dd goes to use something and its not there!!
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peabay
Prolific Pea
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Jun 25, 2014 19:50:41 GMT
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Post by peabay on Dec 31, 2017 18:14:36 GMT
My cousins and I were at our grandmother's on Christmas and we bit into Doritos chips that were in a serving dish and they literally bent. My cousin asked my grandmother "how old are these?" and she said: "I just put them out on Thanksgiving!"
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Post by epeanymous on Dec 31, 2017 18:17:10 GMT
My in laws don’t keep expired food, but their food safety is terrible. They will put raw meat on a platter, grill it, and put the meat or poultry right back on the same platter; they will put food out in the hot sun for hours, stick it back in the fridge, and put it back out the next day.
My grandmother died from an e. Coli infection, and I have a bunch of little kids.
We’ve trying talking about it to them, but they throw temper tantrums. FIL basically threw a tray with raw meat juice at my SIL, eg. So now I will only eat with them if the food is brought in, or I will have us eat before going there and we will pick af crackers and packaged food. I know it upsets them, but honestly they are not going to change so there is nothing else to be done. I am not risking our literal lives over it.
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Rhondito
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Post by Rhondito on Dec 31, 2017 18:21:50 GMT
We have a store in town that sells out dated stuff and it is legal. If it looks good and does not have an off smell it might not be quite as tasty but it is not going to kill you. But why would you want to eat food that doesn't taste as good anymore?
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Post by crazy4scraps on Dec 31, 2017 18:21:55 GMT
Add my in-laws to the list. Dh told them several years ago that every time we eat there we all get tummy trouble, so we now bring food and cook it there for them. Dh also had to request that his dad no longer be involved with the washing of dishes as we all kept breaking things from them slipping out of our hands there was such a greasy film on them. We've endured under cooked turkey more than once and don't get me started on all the food they have canned that is in the cellar. This thread is making us sound like we all have married into the same family. Lol. I'm thrilled with all the new sisters-in-law I have. OMG. The dishes. The dishes! Uggh. Very early on in my relationship with DH, I took on all the dish washing duties any time there was a get together at his parent’s house or lake cabin. I couched it as me being the nice and helpful DIL, but in reality it was because they were so, SO gross! They had a dishwasher at home but it was pretty old and when you use dollar store detergent the dishes don’t get very clean. At the lake there was no dishwasher and those dishes were downright nasty. I don’t know if was because she just couldn’t muster enough elbow grease to get them clean, that she used the cheapest dish soap known to humankind, or if she couldn’t see or feel the crud that remained on the dishes after she gave them a cursory glance with a well used Handi-Wipe or what, but they were nasty. DH and I got to the point where we would go out to the cabin a couple weeks early to “open up” and I would literally take out every single dish, glass, pot, utensil and container right down to the last spoon and wash everything myself with the Dawn dish soap that we bought. I would wipe down every cabinet shelf before putting it all back, and she never was the wiser. After she died and we got the cabin, I made it my mission to go through everything again. All the totally icky plastic containers and rusty utensils were tossed. Anything cleanable and still useful was scoured. There was one clear glass Pyrex dish that was so yellowed with cooked on grease I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to get it clean, but I did. I even stopped halfway through to take a pic to send to my friend because there was no way she would believe it was the same dish.
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Post by crazy4scraps on Dec 31, 2017 18:29:51 GMT
@donnie While dried spices don’t go bad per se, they do lose a LOT of their flavor after about six months. You can use them safely, but they won’t flavor your dishes as well as a fresh container of spice will. Since it’s hard to tell how long something has been sitting in my spice cupboard, now I take a Sharpie and date the top of the container with the date I bought it. If I can open it up and it doesn’t smell like anything anymore, I can pretty well tell that it isn’t going to taste like anything either and out it goes.
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Post by alsomsknit on Dec 31, 2017 18:30:39 GMT
We go through this with my MIL. Somewhat recently we discovered that she had made a desert, that we had already eaten, that was made with graham crackers that had expired 11 years ago. *shake head*
We go through her cabinets and make her get rid of expired stuff. Instead of her buying spices, I share what we buy. It keeps our stash of spices fresh and no worry that she is using 20 year old herbs and spices.
There's no worry of hurting feelings. It's a health issue. She could make herself, Dad, and us very sick by using old food items.
However, I do believe it is easier for us because the lines in our homes are blurred. We are neighbors and see each other every day. We've even taken to buying stuff and sharing, instead of duplicating. And, there is a fair amount of borrowing. LOL!
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Post by **GypsyGirl** on Dec 31, 2017 18:39:35 GMT
they will put food out in the hot sun for hours, stick it back in the fridge, and put it back out the next day. I think I can top that. My dad loved to grill. He was fantastic at it and would insist on grilling enough to feed an army. There was always ribs, burgers, steak and chicken breasts. Awesome when it came off the grill. After we ate, my mom would pile it all in a big pan on top of the stove, cover it with dishtowels and leave it out. Then she would get upset because we wouldn't touch it the next day - after it had been sitting on top of the stove all night with a dishtowel over it! She wasn't that way when I was growing up, but as she got older she definitely had issues with food storage, as well as keeping long expired stuff. I realized it was rooted in her issues with growing up poor, but it wasn't worth risking our health over. After she passed away, we tossed everything that was in her pantry and fridge, with the exception of the boxes of ziploc bags. I suspect her issues/habits are why I go through my pantry and fridge at least twice a year, tossing stuff and scrubbing them down. We all have our crosses to bear!
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Post by beaglemom on Dec 31, 2017 19:07:36 GMT
My inlaws are this way as well. Their pantry is downright nasty. I have cleaned it out twice in the last 16 years. But each time they have insisted on keeping things - like pate that was a couple years expired, things that were so old they didn't have expirations dates. They both still consider themselves "athletes" (73 and 76) so they have boxes and boxes of exercise bars, gels, and goos. There are boxes of things that are full of weivles (sp?) and moth things. The weirdest part is they are super health conscious and 99% of the time the things that are cooked at their house are fresh, so I don't really worry. But we no longer let my father in law cook his "scrambled" eggs for us. My last pregnancy 2015/16 he tried to serve us way undercooked eggs and dh got in an argument about it. Dh told him that he would just recook my eggs a little bit more because he was worried I would get sick. And fil went off at him about how they were perfect and how dare he. So now it is dh's job - it's too bad because I just can't stomach scrambled eggs any more, fil just served them too undercooked for too many years. Just the thought makes my stomach hurt!
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Post by vspindler on Dec 31, 2017 19:29:47 GMT
Ugh, this dishes are a whole other issue lol. MIL insists on washing but does a really poor job of it. Like my SIL will rewash everything after she’s visited, because even handing it back to her to rewash isn’t enough. Today actually SIL texted me to tell me that she told MIL this weekend she might want to consider changing the side of the sink she washes dishes on. Because she has a drying mat that she sets dishes on when unloading the dishwasher, but it is the same side where she currently sets the dirty dishes. So the dirty dishes are set on the mat that she later puts clean ones on.
MIL is having some issues, in my opinion, though only my sister in laws agree. MIL insists that she doesn’t “feel” old. She has said things in the past like “I may be 70 but I feel 40”. Yesterday we opened gifts in age order and she said “I don’t feel like like oldest”. I’m not sure if she is trying to convince us or herself.
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Peamac
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Jun 26, 2014 0:09:18 GMT
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Post by Peamac on Dec 31, 2017 19:30:05 GMT
In addition to being frugal, seniors have a much harder time seeing the use by dates on groceries. I'm 50 yo and have bifocals but still have problems finding and reading the dates on many products. And I think a lot of people think, "Well there's lots of preservatives in this, so I'm sure it will be fine."
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Post by epeanymous on Dec 31, 2017 20:22:11 GMT
In addition to being frugal, seniors have a much harder time seeing the use by dates on groceries. I'm 50 yo and have bifocals but still have problems finding and reading the dates on many products. And I think a lot of people think, "Well there's lots of preservatives in this, so I'm sure it will be fine." What my inlaws actually specifically think (and say) is “we’ve been doing this for years and it hasn’t killed us so it is fine,” which is an attitude I feel like I encounter a lot. Of course, since it literally killed my grandmother, I am less sanguine.
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Post by Eddie-n-Harley on Dec 31, 2017 20:34:21 GMT
MIL is having some issues, in my opinion, though only my sister in laws agree. MIL insists that she doesn’t “feel” old. She has said things in the past like “I may be 70 but I feel 40”. Yesterday we opened gifts in age order and she said “I don’t feel like like oldest”. I’m not sure if she is trying to convince us or herself. "Yeah, well, those of us actually 40 and younger throw out our expired food and don't have cans older than our kids so... there's that." I wish I had something useful to contribute, but I've just got this smiley: .
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katybee
Drama Llama
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Jun 25, 2014 23:25:39 GMT
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Post by katybee on Dec 31, 2017 20:50:53 GMT
In addition to being frugal, seniors have a much harder time seeing the use by dates on groceries. I'm 50 yo and have bifocals but still have problems finding and reading the dates on many products. And I think a lot of people think, "Well there's lots of preservatives in this, so I'm sure it will be fine." I have the HARDEST time finding dates sometimes. You’d think they’d make it easier. But NO. They use a tiny, pixelated font, usually black on dark green, and they hide it somewhere different on every package. It’s worse than Where’s Waldo...
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Jili
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Post by Jili on Dec 31, 2017 20:59:12 GMT
I've had the same situation at my in-laws house. I try to be discreet about what I will and won't eat, but there have been times I have told my girls not to eat long expired salad dressing and other things. I've handled it by letting dh handle it. He's more comfortable telling her that thins are long expired. I believe he goes through the fridge every so often, too.
This is why I prefer to meet at a restaurant.
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Post by vspindler on Dec 31, 2017 21:35:59 GMT
In addition to being frugal, seniors have a much harder time seeing the use by dates on groceries. I'm 50 yo and have bifocals but still have problems finding and reading the dates on many products. And I think a lot of people think, "Well there's lots of preservatives in this, so I'm sure it will be fine." I have the HARDEST time finding dates sometimes. You’d think they’d make it easier. But NO. They use a tiny, pixelated font, usually black on dark green, and they hide it somewhere different on every package. It’s worse than Where’s Waldo... If I am feeding guests (especially if I know one has an illness that effects her intestines!) I will err on the side of buying new rather than risk serving something that could make someone sick.
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katybee
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,447
Jun 25, 2014 23:25:39 GMT
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Post by katybee on Dec 31, 2017 22:21:40 GMT
I have the HARDEST time finding dates sometimes. You’d think they’d make it easier. But NO. They use a tiny, pixelated font, usually black on dark green, and they hide it somewhere different on every package. It’s worse than Where’s Waldo... If I am feeding guests (especially if I know one has an illness that effects her intestines!) I will err on the side of buying new rather than risk serving something that could make someone sick. Oh, me too, for sure. I’m single, so I just don’t buy a lot of stuff in bulk, I usually buy just what I need. I even make most of my own salad dressings. But last summer when I moved, I purged my spices (made a thread about it) and couldn’t find any kind of legible date on most of them. Now I do the sharpie trick when I buy new ones (and I buy the SMALLEST jar I can).
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Post by mikklynn on Dec 31, 2017 22:22:06 GMT
My mother has terrible food safety practices. She keeps lukewarm water in her sink and just swishes her hands in it after handling raw meat. I use DH as a reason to try to teach her better food handling.
The grossest thing I remember is her leaving the leftover thanksgiving turkey out on the counter overnight. I'm surprised we all lived through it.
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Happycat
Junior Member
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Aug 24, 2015 21:49:32 GMT
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Post by Happycat on Dec 31, 2017 22:37:50 GMT
Oooh, some of these stories! I find it really difficult to eat at a "pot luck" gathering if I don't know the person who made the food. Just not worth the risk.
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J u l e e
Drama Llama
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Jun 28, 2014 2:50:47 GMT
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Post by J u l e e on Dec 31, 2017 22:53:21 GMT
I have gone back and forth between laughing out loud at some of these stories (more at how they are written - y'all are funny!) and sad for the hoarder/scarcity mentality in so many of our older relatives. That and I could almost not finish the thread because I wanted to get up and go through my salad dressings in my refrigerator. That's what I generally find we don't use up before the expiration date.
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Post by Layce on Dec 31, 2017 23:06:18 GMT
OMG.. going through my fridge and pantry as we speak. I DO NOT want to become *that* relative Layce
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Post by anxiousmom on Dec 31, 2017 23:07:41 GMT
If I am feeding guests (especially if I know one has an illness that effects her intestines!) I will err on the side of buying new rather than risk serving something that could make someone sick. Oh, me too, for sure. I’m single, so I just don’t buy a lot of stuff in bulk, I usually buy just what I need. I even make most of my own salad dressings. But last summer when I moved, I purged my spices (made a thread about it) and couldn’t find any kind of legible date on most of them. Now I do the sharpie trick when I buy new ones (and I buy the SMALLEST jar I can). I sharpie dates on everything now. I spend a few minutes when i get home from publix with both my glasses and a magnifying sheet finding dates and then re-writing it with GIANT BLACK LETTERS so I can see. I have some vision issues to begin with, but as I get older I can't see any kind of weird, or small font.
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Post by stampinfraulein on Dec 31, 2017 23:10:24 GMT
My MIL is a food hoarder and she has worsening dementia--she shouldn't be living alone but refuses to leave her house. When we were there for Thanksgiving, we sent the grandkids on a hunt through her pantry to see who could find the oldest expired food item. The winner was a can of cranberry sauce that expired in January 1996. When we were there in June 2017, I cleaned out her refrigerator. There were baby carrots that had expired in October of 2016!! There were several bags in the produce drawer that were literally nothing more than green liquid. The eggs had expired in March and several of them in the carton were broken and nasty. The bacon had expired in April and I'm sure was rancid. The butter she got out of the freezer for me had expired in December 2012. There was a can of Campbell's Bean and Bacon soup on her counter that she fully intended to eat that had expired in 2005, before my 12-year-old daughter was even born! When we finally get her out of her house and into assisted living we are going to have to get a 40-yard dumpster for the expired food in her home. Not only is the entire large, full pantry bad, but there are 2 freezers stuffed to the gills with expired foods and she's a prepper so she has flats and cases of canned goods that have expired and some that have leaked and gotten moldy, but we can't even reach them to throw them out now because there's so much crap in the way. It's genuinely horrifying. DH said something to her in June when he found the 2005 soup but she just doesn't have the mental or physical capacity to get rid of the expired food or even remember to check before she eats things anymore. It's so sad and awful and just one of the many reasons she has NO business living alone in her home but she still won't consent to leave!
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