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Post by Susie_Homemaker on Jan 3, 2018 20:16:17 GMT
I just feel like older men are established in their careers So, are you calling 41 an 'older man'? Because that's not really an older man to a woman in her 30's. An older man would be 55 and up I think. If he's 20 or more years older than you then I'd have to think seriously about it but anything under that I don't think it's an issue. I also think that the "daddy issues" comes in when the girl is very young and dating a man old enough to be her dad, like a 25 year old with a 50+ year old. At 33 and 41 I'd say it'a a non-issue. If you like him then carry on!
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likescarrots
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,879
Aug 16, 2014 17:52:53 GMT
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Post by likescarrots on Jan 3, 2018 20:33:29 GMT
I generally don't judge the younger women, but I will admit to thinking it's a little creepy and wonder about the power imbalances. 8 years when both are 30s + isn't that terrible, but for me, I would always wonder why dude couldn't find a woman closer to his own age.
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Post by jenjie on Jan 3, 2018 21:54:49 GMT
My dad and stepmom were about 15 years apart. It was a second marriage for both and they were very good for each other. And she is so good for our family. They were married 27 years until he died at age 80.
I said this here before, the thing that surprised me was her shock that they weren’t going to grow old together. I reminded her that although she didn’t grow old with him, he grew old with her.
Of course, tomorrow isn’t promised to any of us. Even if you marry someone with an age difference of two months, like I did, there’s no guarantee you will grow old together.
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Post by jenjie on Jan 3, 2018 22:00:05 GMT
That being said, my mother married a man who is younger than me and my older brother. That’s weird.
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Post by breakfastattiffanys on Jan 3, 2018 23:10:18 GMT
My ex husband was 8 years older, we were married for 2 decades and the age gap never mattered. I’ve dated significantly younger and somewhat older, as well as close to my age. It all depends on the people involved, but 8 years is still close enough that your references won’t get a blank stare. That’s the worst, and when I’ve realized the relationship wouldn’t work
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Post by AussieMeg on Jan 4, 2018 0:21:48 GMT
Eight years isn't "older man" in my book (but then, DH is five years older than me). To me, "older man" would be someone who is old enough to be your dad. I agree - When you said "older man" and "daddy issues" I assumed you meant someone who was 20+ years older. The older you get, the less an age gap matters. 33yo / 41yo isn't that big of an age gap. Two years ago you were both in your 30s. Of course it would be a different story if you're talking about 15yo / 23yo. Having said that...... I have a friend whose husband is 10 years older than her. She said that when she was 19 it was "cool" to be dating a guy who was 29. But now that he is in his mid-50s and she is in her mid-40s, she thinks it is NOT cool at all!
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Post by leannec on Jan 4, 2018 2:59:30 GMT
Dh is two years younger than me but my bff is engaged to a great man who is ten years older than her ... she is 40 and he is 50 and they are so cute together I would have a problem if my 18 year old dd was dating a 28 year old man
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sassyangel
Drama Llama
Posts: 7,456
Jun 26, 2014 23:58:32 GMT
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Post by sassyangel on Jan 4, 2018 4:46:55 GMT
My husband is 7 years older than I am. I love my dad and have no daddy issues, that I know of.
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peabrain
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,588
Jun 25, 2014 22:18:04 GMT
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Post by peabrain on Jan 26, 2018 20:20:26 GMT
Any update to this @its me mg ?
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Post by littlemama on Jan 26, 2018 20:36:51 GMT
The peas should have a field day with this, right? In your opinion, is a woman who dates older men someone that has "daddy issues"? I have an online dating profile, and I get messages from guys of all ages. I've seen several guys who I've hesitated to like/chat with because they were significantly older then myself. There was this one guy who was my match, but we had a limited time to chat. We had exchanged nothing but the usual mundane chit chat. Nothing bad, but nothing memorable. I didn't really care when the chat room expired, but he used a credit to extend the chat/rematch us. I started chatting him up because he put in the effort, and I actually like him the more we get to know each other. See what happens when you give someone a chance?! I'm 33, he's 41 ... not too bad, right? For the record, I have no daddy issues. My dad has been and still is an incredible part of my life. He has been an excellent role model of what a man should be. I just feel like older men are established in their careers (don't worry, I have my own! not a gold digger!), they know what they want, and they don't play games/ghost. Obviously, not ALL men are like this, but I feel like generally speaking older men just have their sh*t together so to speak. Thoughts? 8 years is nothing. If you were 20 and dating a 50 year old, I might wonder, but ultimately, it's no one's business
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StephDRebel
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,691
Location: Ohio
Jul 5, 2014 1:53:49 GMT
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Post by StephDRebel on Jan 26, 2018 21:31:16 GMT
DH is 12 years older than I am. I moved into adulthood before my time so it doesn't seem like an issue at all. Our oldest children are just 2.5 years apart in age.
it only got weird when we were sitting around a bonfire and realized that my mom married younger and I married older so my stepdad is only 6 months older than my husband.
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Post by maryland on Jan 27, 2018 0:51:59 GMT
I don't think that at all. As long as the couple loves and respects each other, that's what matters to me! My husband's uncle married a woman 17 yrs. older (he was 25 and she was 42 when they got married). They had a long and wonderful marriage and he didn't have mommy issues. They were a great couple!
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Post by georgiabeachbum on Jan 28, 2018 22:17:04 GMT
I have no daddy issues. DH is 14 years older than me. We’ve been married for 25 years. I fell in love with him not his age.
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Post by Mel on Jan 29, 2018 16:45:00 GMT
My ex was 2 years older than me. I always thought I liked older men. Turns out the love of my life is actually 2 yrs younger. We've been together almost 3 yrs now and I have never been happier. Age is a number.
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smartypants71
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,815
Location: Houston, TX
Jun 25, 2014 22:47:49 GMT
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Post by smartypants71 on Jan 29, 2018 17:36:39 GMT
I thought as long as the formula checked out (1/2 your age + 7 or conversely, your age - 7, then double), you were fine LOL!
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Post by luv2scrapaboutmykids on Jan 30, 2018 2:51:05 GMT
I am 42 and my love is 62. We are 20 years apart.
That is a huge difference and we know it. We have been together for 7 years and it has been awesome. He is my best friend and I don't want that to ever change. I do know that as we age things will change and I may end up caring for him more than if he was closer to my age. I am fine with that. We have so much in common and get a long so well. We both have great jobs, families, and stability.
I DO NOT have Daddy issues as my Dad is and always has been an amazing guy in my life. We have never had any issues or problems. My parents have been married since 1960 and I would not want to change my Dad for anyone else.
My bf is not like my Dad (who is 77) other than they are both really great men and want the best for me.
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