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Post by jackietex on Jun 5, 2018 1:57:05 GMT
I would keep them with you and let your family know that they should be buried with you (or whatever you would like done).
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tanya2
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Post by tanya2 on Jun 5, 2018 2:01:08 GMT
i agree take them with you
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 5, 2018 2:37:51 GMT
What do you want done with them after you pass away?
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Post by CarolinaGirl71 on Jun 5, 2018 2:45:47 GMT
If you are against scattering, then take them with you. Do whatever makes you feel comfortable.
Best wishes with your move and life changes! Keep us posted on how things are going for you.
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Post by leftturnonly on Jun 5, 2018 2:54:19 GMT
I'm truly sorry for your loss. Reasons to leave it here: this is Zack's home Don't do that. Take him with you. Bury him. Scatter his cremains. Take a small bit and make a beautiful necklace. You could even do all of those, but don't leave his urn behind with those who don't feel the same way about having a loved one's cremains as you do. There is no right or wrong here. The feelings of his father and his sisters are just as valid as yours are. If you feel you must leave a piece of him there, then take a small bit and bury him in the yard.
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PLurker
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Post by PLurker on Jun 5, 2018 2:57:09 GMT
Many good suggestions above to choose from. I would only suggest to choose one that does not involve leaving them where the others, who are creeped out, could make the decision for you.
Hugs and good luck in you move and future.
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Post by auntkelly on Jun 5, 2018 2:57:10 GMT
I think you will feel better if you take the cremains with you. Hugs to you.
I hope you enjoy Houston. We lived there for ten years and loved it.
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imsirius
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Post by imsirius on Jun 5, 2018 2:58:27 GMT
Take him..no question.
So glad you are moving. I think about you often.
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Post by mom on Jun 5, 2018 3:20:34 GMT
I’ve lost a child - no way would I leave her behind if I was moving.
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Post by cindytred on Jun 5, 2018 3:43:47 GMT
What do you want done with them after you pass away? I would like him to be buried with me. Cindy
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Post by cindytred on Jun 5, 2018 3:44:59 GMT
I think you will feel better if you take the cremains with you. Hugs to you. I hope you enjoy Houston. We lived there for ten years and loved it. Thank you. I love Houston. I lived there for 13 years - and all my kids were born there. Cindy
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Post by cindytred on Jun 5, 2018 3:46:46 GMT
I’ve lost a child - no way would I leave her behind if I was moving. I'm so sorry for your loss. Cindy
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Post by Really Red on Jun 5, 2018 3:47:17 GMT
I would plant a tree at the home where he lived and put his ashes in the soil with the tree. The tree will always have a part of him in it. Thats a sweet idea. Cindy I love this idea. You don't have to put all the ashes there; you can leave some with you. I'm sorry about this difficult decision, but I'm happy you're ready to start your life. Take your son with you to your new life, too!
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Post by katlaw on Jun 5, 2018 3:48:48 GMT
I would either take them with me rather than risk losing them in the future. Or do you have a family member to bury the urn with? I buried my father's urn in the same plot as my great grandmother. He was very close to her, he lived with her when he was in university and he named me after her.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 5, 2018 3:49:23 GMT
I would take them. Think of it this way: his home is and was always with you, not necessarily with a specific geography. He will still be "home" in Houston because he will be with you.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 5, 2018 4:35:57 GMT
What do you want done with them after you pass away? I would like him to be buried with me. Cindy You have your answer. Take him with you. You can tuck him in the closet or in where ever you want. Then make out your will. Describe what his box looks like and what you want done with him and your remains. Give a copy of this directive to someone you trust. I am so sorry you are going through this, nobody should ever have to.
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Post by tripletmom on Jun 5, 2018 4:38:10 GMT
Our daughters cremains are on our mantel surrounded by pictures of her, her favorite stuffed animal, and pictures of our family. I I would absolutely take her with me, and if husband and I divorced I’d fight for her. It’s all I have left, I’d never leave her behind. If we go out of town, she’s put in our safe. If there’s a tornado warning, she goes to the basement with us. I just can’t inagine leaving her behind.
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Post by flanz on Jun 5, 2018 4:39:44 GMT
I just want to say I'm so very sorry that your son died. I don't know how long ago it happened, but my heart hurts for you and all parents who have lost children. Love and hugs to you, Cindy. I hope you have a great experience in Houston. Good for you for taking the plunge!
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Post by AussieMeg on Jun 5, 2018 4:44:14 GMT
I'm sorry that this is something you have to even think about. With the information you have provided, I would take the urn with me. Reasons to leave it here: this is Zack's home Yeah but you're his mum. ![:love:](//storage.proboards.com/5645536/images/W4b_Om5roEadLiOzGo_l.jpg) That's far more important than bricks and mortar. Especially when the other person inside those bricks is creeped out by it.
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Post by cindytred on Jun 5, 2018 4:48:42 GMT
I've decided to take Zack with me. Thank you to everyone for sharing your thoughts on this. Ya'll are very sweet.
Cindy
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Post by Delta Dawn on Jun 5, 2018 5:30:46 GMT
I think you just needed to hear from us you were doing the right thing and in your heart you know it is the right thing for you and Zach. Now, your new mission is to start your wonderful life in Houston and be happy again! ![](http://i1168.photobucket.com/albums/r481/2peasrefugees/Smilies/hug.gif)
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Post by disneypal on Jun 5, 2018 6:59:41 GMT
I think you should take them with you - you will know the urn will be taken care of and Zack’s home isn’t there..his home is where his mother is.
I wish you much luck and happiness in your move
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Jun 5, 2018 8:43:05 GMT
I would take them.
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oaksong
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Post by oaksong on Jun 5, 2018 9:09:00 GMT
I think you’ve made the right decision in keeping your son’s ashes with you. Maybe once you get settled, you can purchase a niche for his cremains that will have space for yours in the future. (Or a grave if you will be buried.) That way it is all set for your future wishes of being together.
Best of luck in your move. I’m glad you are finally able to create a new life for yourself.
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Post by Spongemom Scrappants on Jun 5, 2018 10:17:52 GMT
I'm glad to hear you are taking him with you. And I wish you the best of luck on your move and job hunting. Keep us posted. We'd love to hear that you've gotten settled and are loving your new life. Then make out your will. Describe what his box looks like and what you want done with him and your remains. Give a copy of this directive to someone you trust. Just issuing the standard PSA here -- your will is the wrong place to put any wishes about your funeral, burial, cremation, or related topics. That all needs to be a SEPARATE document and easily accessible immediately upon your death - i.e., NOT in a safe deposit box or home safe.
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eastcoastpea
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Post by eastcoastpea on Jun 5, 2018 10:33:21 GMT
I'm glad you're taking Zack with you.
Best of luck with your job search.
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Nanner
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Post by Nanner on Jun 5, 2018 12:04:45 GMT
Yes, take them with you.
Good luck with your move, Cindy. I wish you well!
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maryannscraps
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Post by maryannscraps on Jun 5, 2018 12:09:34 GMT
I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm glad to hear you are taking them with you. It's important to you to have him close, and you would worry if you left him behind. Your husband and daughter don't have the same feelings about his ashes that you do, and it's important to respect their wishes also. What you're doing is the right thing and will give you peace of mind.
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Post by mikklynn on Jun 5, 2018 12:40:38 GMT
If I was against scattering, then I'd take his ashes with me. I would not leave him where 1) people are creeped out by it and 2) risk having them dispose of his ashes. I agree. I'm sorry you even have to think about this. I wish you great luck in your new life. I hope you find a wonderful job.
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ellen
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Post by ellen on Jun 5, 2018 13:21:28 GMT
My coworkers' son was killed in an accident a few years ago. He was cremated and they buried his ashes at the cemetery closest to where he grew up. I think that is probably what I would do if I were in that situation. I should have added that my friends also bought plots for themselves at the time so that they would be buried with him. His name was Zack too. He was such a good kid. SaveSave
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