craftymom101
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,663 
|
Post by craftymom101 on Apr 18, 2019 1:47:31 GMT
I'm finishing up my bachelor's degree, four years after my ex-husband and I separated. I started with only a few credits so I needed to finish my AA, then transfer to another college for my Bachelor's degree. In a week I will be done with all of my classes and have my degree.
My parents have been so supportive of my studies, paying for my first year of school (I received financial aid for the rest), and generally encouraging my efforts. However, after four years of hard work, they aren't making the effort to fly out for my graduation. I don't have any family in the state and my kids (13 and almost 10) won't want to sit through a 2 hour ceremony. I didn't end up signing up for commencement. I didn't think it was a big deal but the closer I get to finishing, the more I'm disappointed that no one seems to care. Hell, I flew from Ohio to Washington State with a 4 year old and a one year old, by myself!, to attend my sister's college graduation.
I'm proud of myself for finishing my degree with an outstanding GPA, but it would be nice if my family was a little excited for me. I guess I just needed a place to vent my sadness.
|
|
|
|
Post by jeremysgirl on Apr 18, 2019 1:51:35 GMT
I validate you and send a hug. I walked for my grad school graduation. I did it for me. I was proud of that achievement. Luckily my family seemed proud of my achievement too. I would have been really hurt had I not had anyone there to celebrate with me.
But I had a fun time celebrating with my friends. I printed out all the papers I wrote. And then we had beers and bonfire at my house. I hosted. Any chance your friends might be up for that?
|
|
|
|
Post by mom on Apr 18, 2019 1:55:54 GMT
I am so sorry! Since your family isn't telling you this, I will!
I am super proud of you! You have worked hard and followed your dreams and that is admirable! You have shown your kids that maybe your life isn't what you thought it would be, but that doesn't mean you can't pick yourself up and chase after the life you want! Going back to school probably wasn't easy and you were probably scared, but you faced your fears and concerns and made it happen! Hold your head up. You've done well!
I am proud of you!
|
|
kelly8875
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,391
Location: Lost in my supplies...
|
Post by kelly8875 on Apr 18, 2019 1:59:04 GMT
Finishing your degree is amazing! You should be very proud of yourself!
Is it too late to participate in the ceremony? I would walk across that stage proud, and make everyone else feel bad that they missed it!
|
|
teddyw
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,917
|
Post by teddyw on Apr 18, 2019 2:00:03 GMT
What an amazing example you set for your kids after your marriage split up.
You did an awesome job finishing. Congratulations!
|
|
craftymom101
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,663
|
Post by craftymom101 on Apr 18, 2019 2:00:10 GMT
I am so sorry! Since your family isn't telling you this, I will! I am super proud of you! You have worked hard and followed your dreams and that is admirable! You have shown your kids that maybe your life isn't what you thought it would be, but that doesn't mean you can't pick yourself up and chase after the life you want! Going back to school probably wasn't easy and you were probably scared, but you faced your fears and concerns and made it happen! Hold your head up. You've done well! I am proud of you! Thank you for that. I teared up reading your post. ❤ |
|
|
|
Post by cindytred on Apr 18, 2019 2:03:00 GMT
Congratulations on such a big achievement. I am proud of you. I don't know how you did it as a single mom with 2 young children. You are amazing.
Cindy
|
|
craftymom101
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,663
|
Post by craftymom101 on Apr 18, 2019 2:03:21 GMT
kelly8875 the deadline to participate in commencement was the first week of April. The idea of walking across the stage and not having anyone to cheer for me was really depressing! I could have done it but I didn't want to think back at my graduation ceremony with sadness because I was there by myself.
|
|
|
|
Post by KikiPea on Apr 18, 2019 2:03:25 GMT
|
|
|
|
Post by Zee on Apr 18, 2019 2:04:01 GMT
I'm proud of you but i just finished my degree last fall, 20 years after getting my ADN, and it was really a non-event for me. I wouldn't have expected my parents to fly in to attend. Even i didn't attend. Maybe they don't realize that it's that important to you.
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Jul 4, 2024 4:02:28 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2019 2:06:07 GMT
Congrats!!!  I'm sure your family is proud of you despite the fact that they won't be there to celebrate the day. Congrats on getting your bachelor's!  |
|
J u l e e
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,531
Location: Cincinnati
Jun 28, 2014 2:50:47 GMT
|
Post by J u l e e on Apr 18, 2019 2:07:30 GMT
Are you still in Ohio? I'll come to your ceremony and take you out to lunch after! Serious offer.
ETA - just read that the deadline has passed. I'm sorry!
|
|
craftymom101
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,663
|
Post by craftymom101 on Apr 18, 2019 2:07:38 GMT
Zee honestly, I didn't realize it was important to *me* until no one seemed excited about it. I probably should have communicated with my parents (and my sister) that having them here is important to me. Congrats on graduating!
|
|
craftymom101
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,663
|
Post by craftymom101 on Apr 18, 2019 2:08:14 GMT
Are you still in Ohio? I'll come to your ceremony and take you out to lunch after! Serious offer. No, I am in Florida now.  Thank you, though, what a sweet offer! |
|
|
|
Post by Dixie Lou on Apr 18, 2019 2:09:03 GMT
What you've accomplished is amazing! Congratulations!
I'm sorry you don't have family there to celebrate with.
|
|
julie5
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,611
|
Post by julie5 on Apr 18, 2019 2:10:33 GMT
Oh I am so proud of you too! You’ve done an awesome job and I wish you nothing but wonderful thoughts. Please post a picture of you with your degree! Even if no one in your actual life is cheering you on, we here at the pod are!!!! <3<3<3 I wish I hD the strength you’ve had to do all the hard work!!!
|
|
scrapngranny
Pearl Clutcher
Only slightly senile
Posts: 4,775
|
Post by scrapngranny on Apr 18, 2019 2:11:54 GMT
Congratulations!! I certainly support your hard work towards your degree. You have out worked and surpassed the effort of any full time student. You have raised your children single handed and worked all the while completing you class work. You deserve to be celebrated!!  |
|
|
|
Post by Zee on Apr 18, 2019 2:16:06 GMT
Are you still in Ohio? I'll come to your ceremony and take you out to lunch after! Serious offer. No, I am in Florida now. Thank you, though, what a sweet offer! If you come to Georgia wellw go out and celebrate together 😊 |
|
|
|
Post by pjaye on Apr 18, 2019 2:16:30 GMT
Not wanting to fly out for a boring ceremony is NOT the same as not caring.
Your parents have shown you they care, they have supported you financially and that suggests to me they understood the importance of this to you, and have probably [reading between the lines here] supported you emotionally over the years as well.
Honestly unless you are a young adult and this is the biggest thing you've done in your life, making other people FLY to sit through a ceremony shouldn't be this important to you. You've been married, you've had 2 children, the achievement of getting a degree is great...well done, the ceremony is meaningless.
You put in the work and you've been successful...you did it for you and your kids (I assume) to give you a better career options/money. YOU should be proud of that. Having other people congratulate you should also be enough. Why do they need to be there in person?
You want to deliberately ruin this for yourself by making a big deal of people not flying & sitting for two hours to watch you get a piece of paper for 2 minutes?
Be happy that you finished, be happy that you have parents who have supported you, be gracious when they congratulate you and don't get all pissy that "no one cares about you". That's just juvenile, you are a grown women with your own family and leading your own life, you can't expect others to make accommodations based on your priorities.
|
|
|
|
Post by auntkelly on Apr 18, 2019 2:20:26 GMT
I think you should organize some sort of celebration for yourself. Host a small party, take the kids on a weekend trip or rent a cap and gown and have a photographer take pictures of you around the campus. You deserve some sort of celebration!
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Jul 4, 2024 4:02:28 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2019 2:30:32 GMT
Get a gown and take tons of photos! Btw goodwill is full of them.
Have a party.
|
|
|
|
Post by monicad on Apr 18, 2019 2:36:25 GMT
First of all, CONGRATULATIONS! That is a huge accomplishment and you should be very, very proud of yourself.
It took me five years to earn my AA degree while dealing with raising children and going through some very difficult personal issues. My dad knew all of this and on the night of my graduation he sent a text that he wasn’t coming. I even sent him a photo in my cap and gown and received no response. Although I did have other family there, it really hurt that my own parent couldn’t be bothered. I understand your disappointment and frustration.
If you lived in the Bay Area I would totally come and cheer for you! Good luck with your ceremony and I hope you are able to celebrate another way.
|
|
|
|
Post by crazy4scraps on Apr 18, 2019 2:36:53 GMT
|
|
msliz
Drama Llama
The Procrastinator
Posts: 6,419
Jun 26, 2014 21:32:34 GMT
|
Post by msliz on Apr 18, 2019 2:39:18 GMT
We're very proud of you. In fact, we think you're freaking awesome!  Congratulations! |
|
|
|
Post by roberta on Apr 18, 2019 2:40:04 GMT
I think you should organize some sort of celebration for yourself. Host a small party, take the kids on a weekend trip or rent a cap and gown and have a photographer take pictures of you around the campus. You deserve some sort of celebration! THIS! I was going to suggest a party with your kids. Your (and their) favorite foods and an activity. Give yourself a wrapped present 🎁 for your great achievement! You are AWESOME 👏 Great grades while a single mom!! That is HUGE! 👩🎓🎉👏🥂🧁🎆🎇🎇🎆🧁🥂👏🎉👩🎓 |
|
craftymom101
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,663
|
Post by craftymom101 on Apr 18, 2019 2:47:28 GMT
Thank you for the congratulations and well wishes. I do realize that graduating college in my 30s is far different than graduating right after high school. I went back to school for me and the betterment of my life and I'm proud of my 4.0. I plan on taking myself out for a drink next weekend to celebrate. |
|
oaksong
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,167
Location: LA Suburbia
Site Supporter
Jun 27, 2014 6:24:29 GMT
|
Post by oaksong on Apr 18, 2019 2:48:29 GMT
What a great accomplishment! I’m sure your family is very proud, even if they aren’t coming out to celebrate with you. Maybe the resentment toward them is really misplaced anxiety about the next phase of your life.
We’re all (with the exception of someone who’s very cranky today) very proud of our sister Pea for an amazing job well done. It must have been so difficult. I can’t imagine. What are your plans now?
|
|
|
|
Post by tentoes on Apr 18, 2019 2:57:15 GMT
Congratulations! That IS quite an accomplishment--especially with two little people to take care of besides all the school work!! I attended my ADN graduation (in my 40's) but didn't participate in my BSN graduation a few years later. I'm not sure I missed anything. I wish you luck in your chosen field!!
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Jul 4, 2024 4:02:28 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 18, 2019 2:58:14 GMT
 Proud of you!!! |
|
|
|
Post by Crack-a-lackin on Apr 18, 2019 2:58:16 GMT
Congratulations to you!! Going back to school in your 30s is harder than doing it in your early 20s. I’m super proud of you, too! It takes courage and perseverance to finish school while raising two kids on your own. That’s amazing, and you’re amazing. Whether you walk or not you’ve achieved something great!
|
|
Thank you, though, what a sweet offer! 
