I need a vent thread! Please join me

Same shit, different day.

DH is supposed to walk our hallway every night for his daily exercise. We agreed - 5 sets of 12 laps, from one end of the hall to the other end. At the end of each set, he is supposed to send me a text telling me what set he just completed because when you do something every night it can be hard to remember if you just did tonight’s 3rd set or was that last night? Send a text each time and there’s no doubt.  Simple, right? HA!

My mom got here a month ago and I was busy with her at night. I wasn’t always upstairs when DH did his laps. He forgets that I can hear him walking down the hall every time and I can tell when he goes all the way because of the floor creaks. I am a counter anyway, so I automatically start counting when he starts walking. No surprise, he cuts every lap short and then cuts the sets short and then just lies completely about having done a set. Missing a few won’t hurt so I shrug my shoulders and move on.

Over the 2 weeks Mom is here, he does this repeatedly, to the point he claims to have walked all 5 sets in 30 minutes, something he cannot do, not and still breathe. Again, trying to wait until Mom leaves, I don’t say a word. By the 2nd week his BP has gone up to the point he is just below his cutoff, but still, he fakes it.

Mom leaves.

I made a point of being upstairs every night when he gets up from his nap, so he can’t claim to have done any while I’m downstairs. The first night, it took 10 minutes to do half, that’s 6 laps, of the first set. I made no comment, just stood at the door and chatted with him, graciously counting aloud for him. No shortcuts, no cutting laps, by the end of the first set he was exhausted. I reminded him to text me the set number and went to sit down. I stood at the door for every set he did that night. He was furious, but smart enough to keep his mouth shut.

Every night that week he tried to claim he had done multiple sets before his nap, before I came upstairs, while I took 3 minutes to pee. Nope, I was upstairs before and immediately after his nap and I talked to him thru the bathroom door. Plus, no text!

This week his bp is back to normal and he can do a set without gasping. Last night he didn’t realize I was sitting in the living room where I can hear everything he does and he sent me a text that he had just done a set. Nope,not having it. I let him know that if he wanted that one to count, he had to do it. He was busted, he knew it, I knew it, but he wanted to argue. I pointed out that he didn’t have enough air left to argue when he actually did a set. He gave up and did the set.

Tonight, he didn’t send any texts as he did each set. I distinctly remember 2, but he claimed more. I agreed to count 2 even though he didn’t send the texts. He had a 2 year old temper tantrum in the hallway - I threatened to make him stay home and miss the movie tomorrow if he didn’t behave. The look on his face was priceless! 

How simple is it to teach yourself to send a text when you complete a task? No arguments necessary - do the task, send a text. Seriously!?!?  His bp is over 20 points lower when he does the walking consistently and his water pills are so much more effective. With CKD, every bp point and water pound is important, so why am I having to fight with him? Dumbass

And no, I can’t let this be his choice. Not when he is the sole bread earner at this point. Yes, I’m looking for work but no, I haven’t had any nibbles recently. Yes, he’s a grown man except when he isn’t.

If you are raising kids and you don’t make them do the hard things in life, this is what you get. My MIL did me no favors, bless her heart.

Marcy