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Post by grate on Aug 3, 2015 15:02:26 GMT
so beautifully written! Sending much respect and admiration for how you all have moved through this transition. So happy for Noah that he has seen the "it gets better" side, and for you!
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Post by shevy on Aug 3, 2015 15:25:09 GMT
Thank you for sharing. For letting us into your world to help us learn.
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Post by SallyPA on Aug 3, 2015 16:00:42 GMT
Thank you for sharing- it is beautifully thought out and heartfelt.
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Post by cindytred on Aug 3, 2015 22:19:28 GMT
I admire Noah for being who he is meant to be. I admire you and your family for how you have helped and supported your child. Thank you for sharing.
Cindy
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tanya2
Pearl Clutcher
Refupea #1604
Posts: 4,426
Jun 27, 2014 2:27:09 GMT
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Post by tanya2 on Aug 3, 2015 23:06:49 GMT
You are an awesome mom! I wish your family the very best!
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Post by genny on Aug 4, 2015 0:10:00 GMT
Thank you for posting this. Your story is real, honest and full of emotion. One of my children just yesterday (we are on vacation and took a long walk down the beach) told me they were confused about their sexuality. I know it's a different thing, but your raw story could not have come at a better time for me. I will do my very best to model your faithful and accepting example of mothering at it's best as we navigate these waters together. It will just be this child and myself for awhile, as I've been asked not to breathe a word of this confession to my DH or any other family, at least for now. I admire you and Noah and your entire family tremendously. And I second the motion that you start a blog or write a book - you are a fabolous writer!
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Post by quinlove on Aug 4, 2015 0:16:37 GMT
What a beautiful story so full of love and acceptance.
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knotlazy
Full Member
Posts: 275
Jun 26, 2014 18:00:51 GMT
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Post by knotlazy on Aug 4, 2015 0:44:13 GMT
Thank you for sharing your story. I don't think I know anyone dealing with this so I appreciate your honesty so I can always be kind. I think you are setting a wonderful example.
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Post by doesitmatter on Aug 4, 2015 1:05:45 GMT
Thank you so much for sharing your child's and family's story. I hope you know how many of us here support you and Noah. I wish I could hug you right now.
I haven't been through this but I do know that I wouldn't want anyone, especially my child to be uncomfortable living as someone he or she isn't. I would move heaven and earth to help my child -and I can see how lovingly you have done that for Noah. You really are an example of an amazing mother.
This last semester I took several grad classes specializing in gender studies and engaged in peer counseling sessions as well. Laverne Cox came and did a presentation as well. I was amazed at the strength of these individuals! I learned so much!
I lift you and Noah in prayer for peace and long healthy, happy lives.
Thank you again for sharing.
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Post by RiverIsis on Aug 4, 2015 1:21:57 GMT
Noah has some really great family members! I'm so happy for him. Life isn't easy, but it makes it a lot better to know people love and support you.
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Post by k8smom on Aug 4, 2015 3:20:18 GMT
Thank you for sharing your story, and Noah sounds like such a wonderful person! I'm sure this has been a difficult journey for your family as you've transitioned through this process, and I am in awe of your parenting. I honestly, truly believe that it's tough stuff we go through in life that spits us out on the other side a changed, kinder, more open minded person. Difficulty is the true character builder... it takes guts sometimes to be who we truly are inside, and I think that applies to all of us regardless of who we are and what we believe. The world is changing and it's because people like you are willing to share your hearts and tears, joys and triumphs and teach us what it really means to love one another unconditionally. Thank you.
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Post by scrappinmom3 on Aug 4, 2015 4:34:57 GMT
Wow. Noah has some amazing parents! Best to all of you.
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LeaP
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,939
Location: Los Angeles, CA where 405 meets 101
Jun 26, 2014 23:17:22 GMT
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Post by LeaP on Aug 4, 2015 6:49:31 GMT
I wanted to post last night, but I was "verklempt". He is lucky to have you as a mom and we are lucky that you are here with us . Thank you for sharing your story.
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gloryjoy
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,332
Jun 26, 2014 12:35:32 GMT
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Post by gloryjoy on Aug 4, 2015 12:48:48 GMT
Thank you for sharing your story with us.
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Post by Kelpea on Aug 4, 2015 13:34:46 GMT
Thank you for sharing your story, and Noah's. I see great things in his future; possibly even in the way he can lead others through the pain and struggle to positive endings. Give that boy a hug from me.
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Post by mommaho on Aug 4, 2015 13:39:56 GMT
What a beautiful story of the love of your family! There is a great organization called link that is a wonderful resource. We had a guest speaker on bullying at a conference whose child had transgendered and she was part of GLSEN. Her name was Karen Gallagher and she is from Ohio.
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Post by gorgeouskid on Aug 4, 2015 13:58:55 GMT
You are the perfect parent. Period.
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Post by flanz on Aug 4, 2015 14:08:21 GMT
Thank you for posting this. Your story is real, honest and full of emotion. One of my children just yesterday (we are on vacation and took a long walk down the beach) told me they were confused about their sexuality. I know it's a different thing, but your raw story could not have come at a better time for me. I will do my very best to model your faithful and accepting example of mothering at it's best as we navigate these waters together. It will just be this child and myself for awhile, as I've been asked not to breathe a word of this confession to my DH or any other family, at least for now. I admire you and Noah and your entire family tremendously. And I second the motion that you start a blog or write a book - you are a fabolous writer! Genny, I can tell that you are an awesome mom too! The fact that your child was able to confide in you is huge, and your thoughtful reply here bodes well for how you will navigate this time with your child and be a source of support. Kudos and hugs to you!
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Olan
Pearl Clutcher
Enter your message here...
Posts: 4,046
Jul 13, 2014 21:23:27 GMT
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Post by Olan on Aug 4, 2015 14:31:44 GMT
wrongwayfeldman what is the name of the leadership camp for social justice. I would love to donate.
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pudgygroundhog
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,643
Location: The Grand Canyon
Jun 25, 2014 20:18:39 GMT
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Post by pudgygroundhog on Aug 4, 2015 14:50:35 GMT
Noah sounds like an amazing kid and I'm glad he's doing well now. I can't imagine how hard this has been for your whole family, but I'm glad Noah has been loved and accepted and allowed to be who he is. You guys rock!
I also think it's great you felt safe enough here to share your story - I'm happy to be part of a community that is supportive and caring. Thanks for sharing - it's a great message people should hear.
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Post by darkangel090260 on Aug 4, 2015 15:03:35 GMT
I would like to say THANK YOU ! I have a few friends who are transgender and I understand their struggle. Most of the time the family turns their back on them. Alot gets stuck in the dark spot and never comes out. You rock for giving you son the support and understanding he need. Thank you for understanding and the support. It will be hard but if you need ear just drop me a line
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Post by rebelyelle on Aug 4, 2015 15:17:30 GMT
What a beautiful story about an incredible family. Thank you for sharing. You, your husband, Noah and his siblings are an inspiration.
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Post by wrongwayfeldman on Aug 4, 2015 18:06:46 GMT
Thank you for sharing -- and the way you told your story was so beautiful and eloquent. Have you considered starting a blog or perhaps a group in your community for parents struggling with issues like you did? Not necessarily having a transgender child, but anyone who is trying to help their depressed teen or their child who feels ostracized? My sister's elementary school friend is transgender; her mother now regularly speaks at community events and our university about transgender issues. I have actually started a blog, and copied this original post almost word for word from there. I haven't made it public yet, and that's one of the next steps on the list of telling our story. Thank you so much for your encouragement. Your thoughts mean so much to me.
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Post by wrongwayfeldman on Aug 4, 2015 18:10:43 GMT
Thank you for sharing your story!! That is quite brave!! I have a question. How do you respond to those that believe this is a sin? and quote bible verses left and right about it? I have an aunt, who is greatly against anything other then heterosexual. It's very frustrating, as I don't believe in that, nor am I raising my girls to believe that, and she posts crap about it on FB daily. Thank you again. It's funny you asked that question. I was actually planning to post the very same one here. I'm not too eloquent when it comes to quoting scripture, but I know that I have always believed that God saw us all before we were born. Every living minute was laid out before a single day had passed. Doesn't that mean that He knew the path we would walk? I can't believe that He has no place other than in His arms for every one of us, if we believe in Him. That's all I need to get through this.
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Post by wrongwayfeldman on Aug 4, 2015 18:15:41 GMT
Thank you for sharing your story! You sound like a terrific mom and Noah sounds like a great kid. Since you are open to questions, I'd like to ask one. Did the high school allow you to enroll Noah as a male student? We actually go this evening to pick up schedules for the fall, and we're hoping to set up a meeting with the counselor and principal to discuss the next steps. A friend suggested us starting a 504 Plan until the official name change paperwork can be completed. I think since most of Noah's classes are either honors or AP, he will have teachers that are confident in their students to make their own choices about their name, but I'm sure it would be easier to have something in writing. All last year, Noah used the one bathroom in the building that was gender neutral, and will continue to use that one this school year. Noah took PE and Health over the summer, so hopefully no one will be splitting kids up by gender for any reason. He is in such a better place now, and this newfound confidence will help him navigate the occasional slip-up among the adults and kids at school, and he has already said he expects to be politely correcting people for quite awhile. Again, I'm amazed daily by how far he's come.
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Post by wrongwayfeldman on Aug 4, 2015 18:18:04 GMT
Your story is incredibly moving, and there are tears in my eyes as I write this. It takes courage to walk a different path, even when you are certain it's the right one. You must be so proud of your child for having that kind of courage. It's a credit to you that he was comfortable enough to share the truth. DD has always been passionate about gay rights, and I have learned so much from her. One of her closest friends has just come out to friends, but not her parents, as transgender. Their preferred pronoun is neutral for now, which was a completely new concept for me. We live in a very open-minded area of the country, yet a high school freshman committed suicide last year due to gender issues. It's so heartbreaking to think about the pain and hatred some children have to endure. Too many don't make it. I wish your family the best on your journey. Your story and those of so many others will continue to be an inspiration. Someday this will be a non-issue, due to those who were brave enough to lead the way. Thank you for helping your DD. There is so much for all of us to learn. We attended a funeral the same year that Noah came forward to us, and we found out a short time later that the teenager had committed suicide for the exact same reason. That shook me to my core.
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Post by wrongwayfeldman on Aug 4, 2015 18:22:48 GMT
Thanks for sharing your story. It was beautifully written. I wish all of you much happiness. I once worked with a woman who stated that if her kid wanted to be an avocado, she would help him in any way she could. A weird analogy for sure but I never forgot the sentiment behind it. I hope that all people who felt they were born into the wrong body will have a support system like Noah does. That is a funny analogy, but it reminds me what my OB/GYN told us. He said, "Michele, imagine one day I told you that sometime in the next year, you would grow a penis. You would also grow facial hair, your voice would deepen, your weight will shift to other parts of your body, and everyone who lays eyes on you will see you as a man. There will be nothing you can do about it, you won't be able to change it, and you will be recognized by everyone you see as a man, even though in your heart and mind you KNOW that you are a woman. That's what the onset of puberty feels like to these kids. It is overwhelming, and there is nothing they can do about it. It's no wonder we are losing them to suicide on a daily basis."
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Post by bc2ca on Aug 4, 2015 18:26:05 GMT
Thanks for sharing your family's journey. It is beautifully written and touching.
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Post by wrongwayfeldman on Aug 4, 2015 19:19:51 GMT
wrongwayfeldman what is the name of the leadership camp for social justice. I would love to donate. Olan, that is so kind. The camp is called ANYTOWN, and the one near us was held in St Louis, Mo. They have camps all over the United States, and it was truly a life changing experience. This year, the students, called "delegates," focused on the "-isms" in our society: Racism, Sexism, Classism, etc. Their mission statement states that they are "A unique and powerful program that prepares young people to be effective leaders for inclusion; creating schools, youth programs, and communities that are welcoming to all of us, not just some of us." I was able to attend the closing ceremony on the last day, and there wasn't a dry eye in the house as these young kids shared their whole hearts. The experiences that our youth go through these days can be very unbelievable, and it's a wonder they come out as amazing as they are. Some of these kids shared stories of things that they have been through that would make a grown man drop to his knees, yet they still fight toward positive change and want to make a difference for other kids. Their local St Louois website is: www.nccjstl.org/anytown/FYI: the cost for attending the camp is listed as over $1500, but from what I understand, almost every student there attended on a full scholarship. Our local public school provided grants for 8 kids to attend.
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Post by lucyg on Aug 4, 2015 20:06:10 GMT
Your story brought tears to my eyes. Wishing Noah a bright and happy future.
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