Mary Kay Lady
Pearl Clutcher
PeaNut 367,913 Refupea number 1,638
Posts: 3,074
Jun 27, 2014 4:11:36 GMT
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Post by Mary Kay Lady on Oct 14, 2016 4:07:25 GMT
about a family that I'm considering sitting for.
***** Original post: I babysit usually on Friday and Saturday evenings. Most of the families I sit for I've found on Care.com. Every family I've cared for has lived in a house. I always Google their address to ensure that it's a safe neighborhood and that I'd feel comfortable.
Today I responded to an ad for a sitter and discovered that the family lives in an RV. I've known families who live in trailers, but never an RV. I'm just not sure about this situation.
I did drive past this RV park on my way home tonight. It was about 10 pm. It seemed clean and well maintained. The RVs looked to be newer models. There wasn't any loud music or people loitering about.
I'm supposed to met with the mom tomorrow afternoon for an interview. Assuming it goes well, she wants me to babysit tomorrow night and again on Sunday.
Can y'all help me think through this? I'm just not sure about this situation.
*********************
Update: I interviewed with the woman this afternoon. She seems nice and I've agreed to babysit for her tonight and again on Sunday assuming that tonight goes well. She's very personable and pleasant.
Some have commented and asked why I have concerns with a family living in an RV. Here's the answer: In the part of Fort Worth where I live it is widely know that there is a group of people known as The Travellers. They are similar to modern day gypsies. They usually live in trailers or RVs and move here in the winter due to our mild winter weather.
Some of The Travellers are known trouble makers. They often to into restaurants, order meals, and leave without paying. They are often in construction work (this woman's husband is) and do inferior work. They make their livings by ripping people off.
There are just some things that seem "off" about this situation. I'm by no means an expert on reading people and situations, but it does strike me as odd that there's a 2 year old child in the home and no milk at all. The only food in the refrigerator is bottled water, condiments and soft drinks. When my kids were toddlers they were constantly eating so I always had food for them to eat.
Here, there's NOTHING! I don't know how old the RV is but the papers are still in the oven. You know, the papers the manufacturer puts in. She must never cook, because there are no pots or pans. She has dishes and silverware, but no cookware at all!
At any rate, I wanted to come back and update this thread so the curious Peas would know what's going on!
******** 2nd update Wow! This thread has been a real education for me! I had no idea that The Travelers were such a widely known group of people. I just know that in my community they're looked down upon. I know that sounds harsh, but when people are trouble makers, take on work projects and do shoddy work, and are dishonest they earn an unfavorable reputation.
The mom told me that they bought the RV because DH is in construction and they thought they'd travel together to his construction jobs and live in the RV. When they got pregnant with their son they decided that it would be better if there was more stability for the baby, so the wife/mom and son stay here and the DH comes back on the weekends if his schedule allows it.
I'm not 100% sure she's a part of The Travelers, but I still suspect that she is. I did some additional research last night and found that the RV part where she lives is well know to the police as being a place where Travelers live. It's not a large RV park, maybe 20-30 spots. I can't ask her outright if she's a Traveler, because I'm assuming that she'd deny it.
I plan to continue to babysit for her as long as I feel like it's a good situation. I want to be able to come alongside this young mom, regardless if she's a Traveler or not, and provide a safe, responsible adult she can leave her child with so she can have some adult time.
What was interesting to me was that I was there twice yesterday and each time someone came to the door to check on her as soon as they realized I was there. The first time it was a neighbor just coming to check on her. The second time a neighbor needed a cup of water heated in the microwave. So regardless if she's a Traveler or not, this seems to be a tight-knit community of people who look out for eachother.
While I'm with this little boy I plan to read to him, play with him, love on him and nurture him so that he'll feel loved and safe. After all, that's what this is all about. The little boy.
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Post by Eddie-n-Harley on Oct 14, 2016 4:13:52 GMT
Well, I recently read a story about a family that sold their house and moved themselves and their kids into an RV because they needed to go to another state for one of their kids' medical treatments for cancer or something and they decided the whole family would go.
I also think that there are some families doing the "unschooling" sort of thing where they travel around the country. Maybe this family is doing that.
But regardless of why they are living in an RV, if something about it is triggering your internal warning system, it's okay to go with your gut and decline the job.
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Post by mom on Oct 14, 2016 4:14:18 GMT
I would have no issue about it. If everything looks to be clean, safe, and on the up and up - I would go, babysit and enjoy myself.
I know of a family that moved to Houston short turn, because of the dads job. They still have a home here, but they are in an RV in Houston. Its more economical for them, when they are still making house payments on another home.
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TheOtherMeg
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,541
Jun 25, 2014 20:58:14 GMT
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Post by TheOtherMeg on Oct 14, 2016 4:16:47 GMT
sitting for. I babysit usually on Friday and Saturday evenings. Most of the families I sit for I've found on Care.com. Every family I've cared for has lived in a house. I always Google their address to ensure that it's a safe neighborhood and that I'd feel comfortable. Today I responded to an ad for a sitter and discovered that the family lives in an RV. I've known families who live in trailers, but never an RV. I'm just not sure about this situation. I did drive past this RV park on my way home tonight. It was about 10 pm. It seemed clean and well maintained. The RVs looked to be newer models. There wasn't any loud music or people loitering about.
I'm supposed to met with the mom tomorrow afternoon for an interview. Assuming it goes well, she wants me to babysit tomorrow night and again on Sunday.
Can y'all help me think through this? I'm just not sure about this situation. I'd wait till after the interview to make my decision, but only because I'm a "more info is more better" person. The fact that the family lives in an RV wouldn't factor into it for me in this case because you said you drove by and the RV court appears clean and well-maintained.
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Post by Really Red on Oct 14, 2016 5:15:11 GMT
Always listen to your gut. Go to the interview and see how you feel. If you still worry, then say no.
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Post by gotranch on Oct 14, 2016 5:37:11 GMT
I babysat for a family that moved into an RV while their new house was being built. They had to move out of their old house before the new one was built. I babysat the kiddos in their old house, RV, and new house.
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Post by LavenderLayoutLady on Oct 14, 2016 10:04:40 GMT
I'm just not sure about this situation. This would tell me all I needed to know about this situation. You are not comfortable with it. End of story. You have no obligation to sit for them. Go to the interview, but tell her the commute was to long, or that you are unavailable right now after all. You don't have to point a finger and say, "You live in an RV!" But you also don't have to work in a situation that makes you uncomfortable.
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Post by destined2bmom on Oct 14, 2016 11:05:26 GMT
Go with you gut. And I would think about calling off the interview if I was feeling that uncomfortable. As far as their reasons for living in the RV, I don't know. But using a babysitter is a good sign and the fact that they are interviewing you.
Right now my nephew and my niece-in-law are having a house built and living in their RV until it is completed. The concrete pad was poured yesterday. They had put their house on the market and it sold quicker than they thought it would and they didn't want to get locked into a lease.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 17, 2024 5:17:14 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2016 11:27:56 GMT
First you need to figure out why a rv makes you think twice. That alone tells me more about you than them.
People choose to live in RVs for many reasons. Some of them are nicer than my house! Some live in them because they split time between two (or more) locations. For some, it's temporary due to short term jobs, housing, or a lifestyle. Doesn't make them bad people.
DH and I had talked about giving up all property and splitting time between two areas and living in a RV after the boys are out on their own. It's one of three possible plans we have. We're middle class, law abiding people.
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Post by littlemama on Oct 14, 2016 12:25:33 GMT
I watch too much Investigation Discovery to respond to this! I would definitely be asking why they are living in an RV, how long they have been in this particular park, etc. If you are still uncomfortable, turn down the job.
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blue tulip
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,985
Jun 25, 2014 20:53:57 GMT
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Post by blue tulip on Oct 14, 2016 12:42:12 GMT
is it just the RV thing, or are there other signs you aren't communicating to us? because I can't figure out when living in an RV became something so creepy? I've known several people who did it, sometimes for a year+: while their houses were being rebuilt from a fire, because they couldn't find a new home after a job transfer, because someone was transferred and the rest of the family couldn't join them yet, they weren't sure they were going to be staying in the area, etc. there are so many reasons, and I don't think you'd be out of place to ask "so, how did you choose the RV lifestyle?" and find out what theirs is. really.. it's not THAT strange and you wouldn't think the same of someone living in a trailer, right? and it's hardly a shack where the kids are in danger.
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NoWomanNoCry
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,856
Jun 25, 2014 21:53:42 GMT
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Post by NoWomanNoCry on Oct 14, 2016 13:10:49 GMT
I'm not sure what you're hesitent of just because it's an RV. My sister and BIL live in a brand new RV because he has a really good job that sends him all over. They're decent people and so far all of her neighbors in all her parks have been decent (no drugs)..they always pick good parks though and not ones that aren't maintained.
She's done pet sitting for other people at some of these parks for people she's gotten to know and never had any issues.
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Post by anonrefugee on Oct 14, 2016 14:06:26 GMT
Definitely go with your instincts, but this insight may or may not help, depending on age of children. I have an old friend who bought a nice RV to live in while he was working on out of town projects- essentially all he does- instead of living in a weekly hotel/suite. He relocates for 3-5 months at a time, too short to bother with an apartment and too long to want to live out of a suitcase. He's usually in boom / rurally areas where corporate monthly apartments aren't available.
If his ( your client) family is young maybe it's easiest to go with him.
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suzastampin
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,587
Jun 28, 2014 14:32:59 GMT
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Post by suzastampin on Oct 14, 2016 14:23:03 GMT
My brother and SIL were living in an RV when they had their first child. Before having the baby they lived 9 months in one location and 3 months in another every year. When SIL became pregnant, they bought land and built their house. They continued to live in the RV while building their house.
Because of that alone, I wouldn't worry about it. But, you need to factor in all the other things, like where the park is, whether it appears to be a safe area, and, most importantly, your feelings during and after the interview. Then you can decide if you would take the job or not.
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Post by JustCallMeMommy on Oct 14, 2016 14:24:45 GMT
I would go see.
The RV itself wouldn't concern me. Some new RVs cost as much as my house. And they are decked out! There are lots of reasons someone might be in an RV - I know someone who travels for work so much that the family just moves their household around. I have another friend who takes her RV to football games every weekend during football season - I could totally see her trying to find a babysitter in her college's town for weekend evenings. She'd be a great customer!
The RV park wouldn't concern me. The families I know who travel in their RV are all pretty well-off - I think of RV travel as something retired people and people with disposable income do. They like being able to take their animals, they sleep better in a familiar bed, etc.
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Oct 14, 2016 15:15:06 GMT
yeah, is it the RV that's worrying you, or what??
My boyfriend has relatives (granted, they're retired) who live in motor homes that cost more than my first HOUSE did! But if that's how the family wants to spend its money on housing, what's wrong with that?? There are LOTS of reasons a family might choose to live in an RV rather than a house, as already stated upthread. That alone doesn't mean they're cooking meth in it a la Breaking Bad, or that they're deadbeats, or anything else like that...
There are places out here in Arizona where during the copper boom, there wasn't enough housing for workers- plenty of people lived in RVs, popup trailers, etc. during that time; there wasn't anyplace else TO live.
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Post by chaosisapony on Oct 14, 2016 15:34:45 GMT
I watch too much Investigation Discovery to respond to this! I would definitely be asking why they are living in an RV, how long they have been in this particular park, etc. If you are still uncomfortable, turn down the job. My ID watching habits have all kinds of problems with this too. It's not an "ew RV" problem, some of them are super nice! The problem for me would be the fact that they could drive away with me. I wouldn't take this job.
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georgiapea
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,846
Jun 27, 2014 18:02:10 GMT
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Post by georgiapea on Oct 14, 2016 15:52:38 GMT
Having an RV, I can't imagine why it would be a problem. Is it a Class A, Class C, a Fiver? People live in their RV's for all sorts of reasons. Taking a temporary job is one. Following the sun is another. Going 'Tiny' is currently popular.
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Post by workingclassdog on Oct 14, 2016 16:00:08 GMT
Go with your instincts... In our town, I would not be babysitting in the RV park. It's got a reputation of people living there on their last leg and lots of police activity. The only other people that come in and out of there is usually single men working here temporarily for months at a time until they have to move to their next location, but they usually don't have families with them or just a spouse.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 17, 2024 5:17:14 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2016 16:00:36 GMT
Some of you need to turn OFF the tv. It has you seriously paranoid about people who are diverse from you. An rv set up doesn't just "drive off" without warning. Jacks have been set up to level it and keep it from bouncing while people walk inside. The drain hoses for waste water, hoses for fresh water and electrical connections work to tie it down. You would know if someone was unhooking it and have plenty of time to get out.
Go meet the family. See what kind of PEOPLE they are, then decide. You'll find plenty of nice normal people live in nice rvs for a multitude of reasons. Turn OFF the tv if it makes you so paranoid about differences in life styles.
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Deleted
Posts: 0
May 17, 2024 5:17:14 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2016 16:11:01 GMT
Go an meet them. If the park seems nice and kept up, most likely they are just in transit to another job/home or just tourists and want to go out and enjoy themselves without the kids. I'll be they will be more leery of you than you should be of them. But if anything seems off, just tell them you are unable to sit for them at this time. No other explanation is needed.
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Oct 14, 2016 16:29:02 GMT
how can they drive off with you if you're taking care of their kids? I'd assume that means they're OUT somewhere???
And it's not like you just turn the key and peel out from their parking space, for gosh sakes! They're hooked up to electrical, water, internet, etc. and they need to be prepared to leave (i.e., putting things away, retracting any awnings, expandable rooms, etc.) and you'd probably know that was going on if they were going to abscond with you. (which they aren't)
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Post by anonrefugee on Oct 14, 2016 16:49:11 GMT
Some of you need to turn OFF the tv. It has you seriously paranoid about people who are diverse from you. An rv set up doesn't just "drive off" without warning. Jacks have been set up to level it and keep it from bouncing while people walk inside. The drain hoses for waste water, hoses for fresh water and electrical connections work to tie it down. You would know if someone was unhooking it and have plenty of time to get out. Go meet the family. See what kind of PEOPLE they are, then decide. You'll find plenty of nice normal people live in nice rvs for a multitude of reasons. Turn OFF the tv if it makes you so paranoid about differences in life styles. Unless they've knocked you out with an ether-filled handkerchief, Nancy Drew style. My paranoia predates my TV watching... But seriously, I agree with Volt. Don't let a negative possibility prevent you from checking it out.
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TXMary
Pearl Clutcher
And so many nights I just dream of the ocean. God, I wish I was sailin' again.
Posts: 2,811
Jun 26, 2014 17:25:06 GMT
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Post by TXMary on Oct 14, 2016 16:49:46 GMT
I'm not sure whether this post should offend me or amuse me. We have been RV/Camping people for most of our married lives...30 years. We currently own an RV lot on the gulf coast of Texas right on the beach and leave a 5th wheel down there year round to spend weekends when we can. Our RV is very nice but we are the poor kids in the hood. Most of the other owners are retired and live part-time/full-time in motor homes that cost roughly $250,000 to $400,000. I can't even imagine...but I would like to try it. RVs these days are VERY nice. I like to joke that our RV is nicer than our house but the truth is...it really is! I know a lot of people who live in their RV while they are building a home. I know people who travel for work and it's easier to have a home that travels with them. I know people who are semi retired and people who are fully retired who like to move around for the seasons. If someone works from home, they often travel around as it doesn't matter where they are physically. I have met people in our park who take their RV down to the beach and rent a lot for the summer for mom and the kids. Dad goes home and works all week while Mom and the kids stay in the RV at the beach and Dad joins them on weekends or whenever he can. When we bought our last RV, the sales man told us that they had been crazy busy selling to people from other parts of the country who were having economic hard times and they came to Texas to work. An RV was a better alternative than buying a house as they didn't intend to stay here after they got back on their feet and things got better at home. It's very popular to live in an RV in the oil fields around here. In all of our many years of camping, I have found RV/Camping people to be mostly good, honest and decent people. Yes, when it's time to pull the RV out it takes at least an hour to prep it. You don't just "drive away". So, I think there must be more to this situation. I do think one should trust their gut, but if the only reason you are hesitant is because they live in an RV, I think you should at least check it out. It's not that unusual anymore.
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Post by papersilly on Oct 14, 2016 16:54:47 GMT
I wouldn't worry about it. many people live in RV's for whatever reason. now if the RV was parked on the street, that would be a definite no. it all depends on you. if you have other babysitting jobs you can do and can afford to pass on this one, don't worry about not doing it.
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Post by melissak on Oct 14, 2016 17:33:07 GMT
RV living is very popular with military families because of the constant moves.
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Post by Crazyhare on Oct 14, 2016 19:44:22 GMT
I know a military family that have a house in a city. But they also have a RV in the city the husband is assigned to. He's a recruiter and does ROTC in a city about 4 hours from their home.
They had an apartment, but it was really expensive. After talking it over, they decided to buy a RV and put it at a park. That way they will own the RV when he retires in 4 years. If he gets transferred, he can move it. And it was less than 1/2 the price of renting. It was a no brainer for them.
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Post by disneypal on Oct 14, 2016 20:08:00 GMT
If you are comfortable, with the family, I think it is okay that they live in an RV. Some people live in an RV but stay put for a really long time (especially if they have kids) and some people like to travel around more. I don't see it that much different than any other living situation.
But, as always, listen to your instinct. It is generally never wrong. If you fell that all is okay, then go ahead but if something bothers you about the situation, then perhaps it is better that you don't.
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Post by bc2ca on Oct 14, 2016 20:13:38 GMT
The only part of the RV location that would make me hesitate would be related to the small space and the ages/number of children I would be looking after.
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Post by workingclassdog on Oct 14, 2016 20:28:11 GMT
I don't think anyone should be offended... I mean RV's are like houses, they can be run down and you wouldn't want to even be near one or it could be a million dollar RV. I am sure the OP is just questioning it ....because it isn't a 'normal' request. In my town (or the one nearest to us) like I said earlier you wouldn't pay me enough to go in the park. Could be good decent people but from what I have heard, there is a lot of shady stuff going on. So it just depends and again, your gut instinct.
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