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Post by Susie_Homemaker on Sept 5, 2017 16:35:19 GMT
I didn't want him to know that I didn't want to have sex. I knew he knew that I didn't...I didn't want to say the words to confirm it. I honestly don't know why I don't want to. I just don't. Saying this gently, but the words aren't even necessary. He knows you don't want to have sex- no words needed. And as to not wanting to- I've been there, done that. The only thing that brought me out of it was him leaving and me realizing just how selfish that attitude had been. Once I realized how deeply hurt he was, cut to the quick as a man, then I realized that I had to change my thinking about it. It stopped being about me and what I wanted or didn't want and it became about him and how could I make him feel loved. That trumps my lack of desire every time. And once I thought about it, why wouldn't I want to have a great sex life? It could be fantastic with this man who loves me and wants me all the time- even when my body confidence is low and I'm feeling fat. He still wants me. I'm not saying you're the same- that's just about me. It may or may not apply to you, OP.
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Post by prapea on Sept 5, 2017 16:35:47 GMT
I will say this about men feeling rejected when women(wife) say no to sex. It works both ways. It might be hard for you to put yourself in their shoes because right now you have no desire to have sex. But let's say you did and initiated it and your husband said no for years. Wouldn't you feel rejected? Wouldn't you think he is probably having an affair? Wouldn't you think you are not attractive to him anymore?wouldn't you think may be he needs to see a doctor?
You need to see a doctor asap. Each person is diffyphysically and there might be some underlying issues that never came out. I am horny as hell from the day I get my period to the 15th day. And the two weeks before my period, I don't care for it much but I will do it. Three days before I get my period, touch me and I can kill you. But the thing is, the husband knows that as we talked about it.
Do you get turned in by watching things? Sex games? But i thhink a trip to the doctir is first
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Post by littlemama on Sept 5, 2017 16:40:36 GMT
Our oldest dog, who was my dog before we got married, passed away in January after his body shut down after an emergency bladder stone surgery. He was 9 years old, and I'm still not completely over it. I was an emotional wreck for months, crying almost everyday, and I blamed myself. I still can't think about what he went through without crying. I'm going to say this as gently as possible - crying every day for months because your dog passed away and blaming yourself for his illness are not typical reactions. Talk to your doctor absolutely openly about all of this and he will be able to help you or refer you to someone to talk to.
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MizIndependent
Drama Llama
Quit your bullpoop.
Posts: 5,836
Jun 25, 2014 19:43:16 GMT
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Post by MizIndependent on Sept 5, 2017 16:45:57 GMT
This is such a painful situation - I'm so sorry you are going through it. You aren't alone though, this is a very common issue in marriages all over.
Michele Weiner-Davis is a wonderful clinical social worker, marriage and family therapist that has some fantastic information about this very thing! Here's her TED Talk:
((((hugs)))
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zookeeper
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,909
Aug 28, 2014 2:37:56 GMT
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Post by zookeeper on Sept 5, 2017 16:54:20 GMT
A church pastor once said something in a couple's Bible study that really stuck with me. "If you do not feel much like having sex with your spouse, think of it like playing a board game with your children. You never really want to play, but you do it because it will make your children happy. More often than not, once you start playing you find that you really enjoyed it."
I promise you that your husband does not see the 40 pounds that you have gained. He sees you as his beautiful wife that he wants to make love to. Be gentle with yourself and talk to your husband about how you feel.
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Post by paperamy on Sept 5, 2017 17:01:28 GMT
Our oldest dog, who was my dog before we got married, passed away in January after his body shut down after an emergency bladder stone surgery. He was 9 years old, and I'm still not completely over it. I was an emotional wreck for months, crying almost everyday, and I blamed myself. I still can't think about what he went through without crying. I'm going to say this as gently as possible - crying every day for months because your dog passed away and blaming yourself for his illness are not typical reactions. Talk to your doctor absolutely openly about all of this and he will be able to help you or refer you to someone to talk to. Well, there is more to his death, just didn't want to get into it. He had a broken toenail that I tried to treat at home. I let it get really bad before taking him to the vet. When I finally took him, my vet scheduled a surgery to remove it, even with it being high risk because of his age. He did the pre-surgery bloodwork and everything seemed fine. Exactly one week later, my dog became impacted with bladder stones. I was at the vet as soon as they opened, and he was taken for emergency surgery. I waived the pre-surgery bloodwork, because the vet tech told me she didn't think it was necessary due to us having the bloodwork one week prior. I should not have listened to her, and I will never waive bloodwork again. He didn't recover from that surgery, and his body shut down due to an elevated pancreas. They tried several doses of fluids and medications, but 3 days after his surgery, he died. So, yes. I blamed myself. If I had gotten the bloodwork the second surgery, maybe something could have shown up that could have given them a different treatment after surgery. Maybe waiting so long about the toenail put his body under stress that caused the bladder stones. I don't think I need to defend my grieving...we aren't the typical dog owners. Our dogs mean the world to us. My husband also grieved, maybe not crying everyday, but I saw him cry more after our dog's death than I think I've ever seen him cry. Even now, if we tell a story about our dog, one or both of us will probably tear up. I don't even think my husband cried when his grandmother died.
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Post by paperamy on Sept 5, 2017 17:02:23 GMT
This is such a painful situation - I'm so sorry you are going through it. You aren't alone though, this is a very common issue in marriages all over. Michele Weiner-Davis is a wonderful clinical social worker, marriage and family therapist that has some fantastic information about this very thing! Here's her TED Talk: ((((hugs))) Thanks...I'll definitely watch this later.
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Sept 5, 2017 17:10:29 GMT
Things that I've learned though all of this are many but one of the biggest is that when a wife doesn't have sex with a DH who wants it then she is rejecting HIM- all of him not just sex. It is deeply hurting when a wife doesn't want him and it is very damaging to him as a man. He wants and needs to be wanted by her. ^^^ this goes the other way, too. Also, "not wanting sex at all" and "not wanting to have sex with ME" are NOT the same thing; it's a fine distinction, but if you don't have a sex drive at all, it's different than rejecting / not wanting YOUR PARTNER specifically (which could imply to the other person that there's some reason-- possibly on THEIR part-- that you just aren't attracted to THEM, but you would be to someone else.) Physical closeness / sexual intimacy is important to people in differing degrees, and I agree- it should be easier to talk about it, but for a lot of people, it's not. Good luck to you and your DH in getting this sorted out so you both feel better about it.
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Post by leftturnonly on Sept 5, 2017 17:10:37 GMT
paperamy - I will not try to weigh someone else's grief. I will not try to lessen how hard this has hit you. When ANY grief goes on for several months at that strength, you really may benefit from talking with someone about it. You may also be grieving another loss that you aren't facing or may not even consciously remember. It happens more often than you may think.
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flute4peace
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,757
Jul 3, 2014 14:38:35 GMT
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Post by flute4peace on Sept 5, 2017 17:13:21 GMT
Do you enjoy it once you get going? Are you just self conscious of your appearance? Do you like your husband? Are you attracted to him? I'm absolutely self conscious of my appearance, but no, I don't really enjoy it. I will do all the things that I know will make him come sooner, so that it doesn't last forever. If I don't rush him, I usually will orgasm (I never fake it), or at least come close to it...but it's hard to describe...even having the orgasm doesn't make it enjoyable. I love my husband more than I can ever explain. I think he's perfect in every way...and I'm absolutely attracted to him. Ask your doctor about testosterone treatments - for you. Also have your thyroid checked along with your female hormones.
And I completely agree with what the others have said. You need to reassure him that it's NOT HIM. Make sure that you clearly convey to him that you adore him, and that your lack of libido upsets you as much as it does him. Ask him to come to the doctor with you. Involve him in your process so that he knows you are trying.
Also - get some dirty books. There are actually some out there that are stories about married couples/monogamous relationships, they're not all disgusting . Try to read a little segment every day or every couple of days, to keep the subject at the front of your mind.
You will be in my thoughts - I've struggled with this off and on over the past few years due to some health/emotional issues. I feel your pain. *hug*
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Sept 5, 2017 17:19:14 GMT
I don't think I need to defend my grieving...we aren't the typical dog owners. Our dogs mean the world to us. My husband also grieved, maybe not crying everyday, but I saw him cry more after our dog's death than I think I've ever seen him cry. Even now, if we tell a story about our dog, one or both of us will probably tear up. I don't even think my husband cried when his grandmother died. I don't see it as you having to defend your grieving, at all... all the issues with your dog dying could have triggered clinical depression, which can be treated. A number of years ago, our first dog died while we were on vacation-- I think it was the kennel's fault, but that's not important to the story, here. I had such GUILT over not being there for her (we both had some) when she needed us that I could not let her death go, for a very long time. I couldn't even think about her without getting very upset, and I knew it was an issue that I needed to deal with. I was seeing a counselor for depression issues already, and finally talked to her about this particular 'triggering' issue and how badly it was affecting me. She helped me with a specific type of therapy related to traumatic incidents so that it wasn't nearly as painful for me to think about her, and I was able to let go of some of the guilt I felt associated with her death. I don't think anyone here is suggesting that you shouldn't grieve for your dog; rather, that you might want to seek some assistance for it, because this amount of grief that long after the event isn't necessarily healthy for the long term.
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MizIndependent
Drama Llama
Quit your bullpoop.
Posts: 5,836
Jun 25, 2014 19:43:16 GMT
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Post by MizIndependent on Sept 5, 2017 17:36:37 GMT
paperamy - I will not try to weigh someone else's grief. I will not try to lessen how hard this has hit you. When ANY grief goes on for several months at that strength, you really may benefit from talking with someone about it. You may also be grieving another loss that you aren't facing or may not even consciously remember. It happens more often than you may think. This definitely could be, but she also needs to be able to forgive herself at some point. Grieving is such a process and our dogs are SO close to our hearts - losing them is often the worst loss because of that deep relationship we have with them. paperamy - I found this when I lost my Lucy, it helped me and I hope it might help you too: "How to Forgive Yourself for Not Protecting Your Dog"Grieving can take a long time, but you don't have to do alone. Your DH is with you in this loss, let him be there in the healing too. Sending you lots of love.
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Post by pondrunner on Sept 5, 2017 17:39:27 GMT
I've been on the flip side of this with my husband. I'm so glad he brought it up to you so you can work on this.
The book The Sex Starved Marriage is so useful.
My advice from what I've learned is this...
You know it isn't about him but he doesn't fully understand that yet.
Alternate forms of intimacy are helpful but may not fulfill all needs. But you might get a long way just by offering a bit of gratification and communicating your openness to do that.
Grief can really screw up everything.
He might feel like this is a much bigger problem than you do and even after you make progress he might have residual feelings down the road so be prepared for that.
You can overcome this together but you have to be intentional about it making you stronger as a couple.
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Post by Lexica on Sept 5, 2017 17:42:22 GMT
I am happy to read that you have made a doctor's appointment. That is a great start. You could have a hormonal imbalance, or any number of issues physically that has drained your desire. You also sound depressed due to your beloved dog's death. That is certainly understandable, but just speaking for myself, when I was very upset, I turned to my husband for solace and it naturally turned into a compassionate sexual episode, as opposed to a hot and heavy episode, making me feel loved and the loss hurt a little less. I was always a very sexual person, and the only time I didn't want sex with my husband was when our relationship started falling apart and he was no longer the man I married. He became snippy, sarcastic, and outright mean, and I didn't find out until later that he had cheated and was trying to make me angry with him to justify what he was doing.
I am currently not seeing anyone, and I am very glad I'm not because I currently have zero sexual desire. Absolutely none. I know it began when I started taking the anti anxiety medication. I don't even care about masturbating anymore, and the few times I decided to do it, I couldn't climax. It just wasn't worth it. I haven't discussed this with my doctor because I am probably much better off not wanting sex right now, but if I start dating again, I am going to look into whether it is the medication, as I suspect, or possibly because my hormones have changed with menopause. I hope I'm not hurting any future desire levels by letting it go now.
I would strongly advise you to talk to your husband and let him know you love him and are extremely attracted to him, but you don't know why your need and desire for sex has gone. Tell him you made a doctor's appointment and are going to keep working toward getting those sexual feelings back. I would imagine knowing that you are willing to look into fixing this will mean the world to him, as well as the reassurance that you do love him.
I have always heard how hurtful it is to a man to be turned down, and the few times that it happened to me in my last relationship made me understand how it felt. My husband never turned me down, but we were in our 20s and 30s so sexual desire was strong for both of us. In my last longterm relationship, my fiancé was 10 years older than I am, and I think that was a part of the reason for our difference in desire levels. When he turned me down, I went through a lot of negative feelings toward myself and eventually toward him. Especially when I would try to initiate sex and he would tell me that he had just masturbated before coming to bed. That was a real slap in the face to me. Especially since my desire was stronger than his and I had never turned him down, so he was assured I would be up for it. I asked him why he didn't check with me first and his response was that he didn't want to bother me. That made no sense to me at all. And I was always very willing to discuss anything and am not shy about it.
Your husband sounds like a real winner with the way he reacted to your saying you didn't want sex anymore. A lot of men would have let that be the beginning of a really nasty argument with name calling and threats of going to get sex elsewhere. The fact that he acted so compassionately toward you tells me that once you and your doctor figure out what is going on with you, things are going to be awesome with your husband again. Good luck! And if the doctor doesn't have anything to suggest to you, consider couple's therapy with a sex therapist. I've heard they can really work wonders.
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luckyexwife
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,067
Jun 25, 2014 21:21:08 GMT
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Post by luckyexwife on Sept 5, 2017 17:43:36 GMT
I have a friend who was going through something along the same lines as this, and they went to a sex therapist. It didn't change overnight, but after working with the sex therapist for almost a year, their sex life was to a place where they were both happy with it. The sex therapist really worked with them on some of the underlying issues that we're going on in their marriage. It's been a year-and-a-half since they stopped going to sessions, and things have gotten even better! Depending on what the doctor says, this could be a good option for you and your husband to look into.
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Post by crimsoncat05 on Sept 5, 2017 17:57:56 GMT
paperamy - I will not try to weigh someone else's grief. I will not try to lessen how hard this has hit you. When ANY grief goes on for several months at that strength, you really may benefit from talking with someone about it. You may also be grieving another loss that you aren't facing or may not even consciously remember. It happens more often than you may think. This definitely could be, but she also needs to be able to forgive herself at some point. Grieving is such a process and our dogs are SO close to our hearts - losing them is often the worst loss because of that deep relationship we have with them. paperamy - I found this when I lost my Lucy, it helped me and I hope it might help you too: "How to Forgive Yourself for Not Protecting Your Dog"Grieving can take a long time, but you don't have to do alone. Your DH is with you in this loss, let him be there in the healing too. Sending you lots of love. What my counselor did for me was something called 'EFT Techniques" which stands for Emotional Freedom Technique, using a memory trigger and tapping on a part of your body, or focusing on a specific sound-- I only needed a few sessions, and it helped me immensely. It's a focused technique that she had training in and it worked really well for me. Basically, it helps to 're-wire' your brain so the memory isn't so traumatic when the thoughts come up. (I was getting to the point where I was almost having panic attacks when I would think about what happened to our dog.) During the sessions, she had me think about the traumatic events at the same time she tapped on my knee (or wrist, maybe- I don't remember). What this technique does, basically, is divides your brain's attention between the traumatic memory and the tapping so that your brain 're-wires' itself somewhat and releases some of the trauma associated with the memory. I don't know if it's widely accepted yet, and a lot of what's on the internet about it makes it sound really 'new-agey' but it worked for me. You did the best you could for your dog, and you loved him. You are not to blame for his death, and re-hashing 'what if' scenarios isn't productive. You can absolutely STILL love your dog, and still honor his memory, but learn to let go of the guilt.
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Post by stampinfraulein on Sept 5, 2017 18:01:18 GMT
I understand how you feel. 100%. Please, please please do yourself a favor and read the book Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski. I checked it out from the library and then just bought my own copy. Google her, read her website and her blog to get a taste of what she is about, read about the dual control system. I have learned so much from her book and I know that you can too! It's not a how-to book--where to put your fingers, tongue, positions, etc. It's basically saying that sex is all in our brains-- Which is a total oversimplification, but makes total sense the way she explains it! I absolutely believe it can help you. It's helping me already. There were times that things in her book brought me to tears of relief, knowing that I am NORMAL, there is nothing wrong with me, and that if I want to change my level of desire, I can totally do it. And it's worth it to have sex with confidence and joy.
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Post by littlemama on Sept 5, 2017 18:23:15 GMT
I don't think I need to defend my grieving...we aren't the typical dog owners. Our dogs mean the world to us. My husband also grieved, maybe not crying everyday, but I saw him cry more after our dog's death than I think I've ever seen him cry. Even now, if we tell a story about our dog, one or both of us will probably tear up. I don't even think my husband cried when his grandmother died. I don't see it as you having to defend your grieving, at all... all the issues with your dog dying could have triggered clinical depression, which can be treated. A number of years ago, our first dog died while we were on vacation-- I think it was the kennel's fault, but that's not important to the story, here. I had such GUILT over not being there for her (we both had some) when she needed us that I could not let her death go, for a very long time. I couldn't even think about her without getting very upset, and I knew it was an issue that I needed to deal with. I was seeing a counselor for depression issues already, and finally talked to her about this particular 'triggering' issue and how badly it was affecting me. She helped me with a specific type of therapy related to traumatic incidents so that it wasn't nearly as painful for me to think about her, and I was able to let go of some of the guilt I felt associated with her death. I don't think anyone here is suggesting that you shouldn't grieve for your dog; rather, that you might want to seek some assistance for it, because this amount of grief that long after the event isn't necessarily healthy for the long term. Thank you for stating this much more clearly than I did.
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Post by paperamy on Sept 5, 2017 18:57:54 GMT
I don't see it as you having to defend your grieving, at all... all the issues with your dog dying could have triggered clinical depression, which can be treated. A number of years ago, our first dog died while we were on vacation-- I think it was the kennel's fault, but that's not important to the story, here. I had such GUILT over not being there for her (we both had some) when she needed us that I could not let her death go, for a very long time. I couldn't even think about her without getting very upset, and I knew it was an issue that I needed to deal with. I was seeing a counselor for depression issues already, and finally talked to her about this particular 'triggering' issue and how badly it was affecting me. She helped me with a specific type of therapy related to traumatic incidents so that it wasn't nearly as painful for me to think about her, and I was able to let go of some of the guilt I felt associated with her death. I don't think anyone here is suggesting that you shouldn't grieve for your dog; rather, that you might want to seek some assistance for it, because this amount of grief that long after the event isn't necessarily healthy for the long term. Thank you for stating this much more clearly than I did. Thank you for your reply and I apologize that I misunderstood your original response. I've had so many friends (well not anymore) tell me that I care too much for my dogs and I spend too much on their food/vet. I misread your views as that, but I see what you were actually saying now. Again, apologizes and thanks.
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Post by librarylady on Sept 5, 2017 20:52:27 GMT
I have not read all the answers, but hormone changes killed my desire. The minute I became pregnant, no desire. Years later, HRT killed desire. Each woman is different, but get hormones checked also.
Good luck on solving this.
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azredhead
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,755
Jun 25, 2014 22:49:18 GMT
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Post by azredhead on Sept 5, 2017 21:01:55 GMT
You have gotten some good advice! Any grief definately changes things. But I echo the words of the peas and see a Dr first and foremost!! Let your husband know you are seeing Dr if you're comfortable with him going so the dr can explain things. Some like that some don't or just go alone at first.. so you can tell him what's going on.. Grief and stress will change your life no matter what the grief is. From pet losses to losses of a person. (we've been through both as I've also shared some at the same time) Being through this you just have to know if your marriage is in tact you can help each other through it. BIG HUGS!! Don't feel guilty even though it's REALLY hard not too! and you can vent to the peas a lot of us have been there.
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Post by paperamy on Sept 5, 2017 21:02:40 GMT
Again, thanks to everyone who has responded. My husband has been texting me as normal, acting like nothing is wrong. I'm definitely going to talk to him tonight. I'll post an update on how it goes.
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inkedup
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 4,837
Jun 26, 2014 5:00:26 GMT
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Post by inkedup on Sept 5, 2017 21:06:30 GMT
Again, thanks to everyone who has responded. My husband has been texting me as normal, acting like nothing is wrong. I'm definitely going to talk to him tonight. I'll post an update on how it goes. I'm sorry you're in such a difficult place right now. Don't lose hope, though; your husband's response and your reaction to his hurt show that you love one another and have a respectful, loving relationship. I'm glad you called your doctor. I hope you are able to work through this and find yourselves in a better place down the road.
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Post by paperamy on Sept 5, 2017 21:09:39 GMT
You have gotten some good advice! Any grief definately changes things. But I echo the words of the peas and see a Dr first and foremost!! Let your husband know you are seeing Dr if you're comfortable with him going so the dr can explain things. Some like that some don't or just go alone at first.. so you can tell him what's going on.. Grief and stress will change your life no matter what the grief is. From pet losses to losses of a person. (we've been through both as I've also shared some at the same time) Being through this you just have to know if your marriage is in tact you can help each other through it. BIG HUGS!! Don't feel guilty even though it's REALLY hard not too! and you can vent to the peas a lot of us have been there. Thanks. Usually he does go to the doctor with me ... I'm getting over a few months of regular headaches that finally seem to be resolved (damn sinuses), and he went with me to every doctor appointment. With that, I was comfortable talking to the doctor about with him present. For this, at least at first, I need to handle without him. I'll definitely let him know exactly what was said and what might be suggested, and follow up visits might involve him. I'm just not sure I could devote my attention to the doctor without worrying about how my husband is reacting or taking things. Not until I'm comfortable with this.
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azredhead
Drama Llama
Posts: 5,755
Jun 25, 2014 22:49:18 GMT
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Post by azredhead on Sept 5, 2017 21:16:05 GMT
yea that's what we've done. Especially with the medical stuff for me. For him he has back issues so that plays alot into it too. Depression takes its toll when you're going from one thing to the next and when it's physical stuff you don't realize sometimes how much it affects everything. If that makes sense? I went through counseling after my mom passed in Feb and my dog two days before. Like you i felt responsible for a lot of both. Even though that it really nothing of that is our fault at all. We just happen to be there experiencing it? If that makes sense. I've learned a lot in counseling lol! Dh and I will have just our little 'meeting' now just to see how we both are or what we are struggling with.. it's really helped. I just hope our crap has helped someone else. I'm glad you got an appt. .. be easy on yourself too! That's the hardest part I think.
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pridemom
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 2,843
Jul 12, 2014 21:58:10 GMT
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Post by pridemom on Sept 5, 2017 22:45:47 GMT
Are you by chance on a blood pressure medication like Lisinopril? That will kill your sex drive completely. I had to go off it. exactly this. I am on this...I don't say no to hubby but I also don't initiate.... Antidepressants and low thyroid can also cause low sex drive.
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Post by jeremysgirl on Sept 6, 2017 1:53:51 GMT
I'm going to share something that I probably shouldn't. I am bipolar with a tendency toward mania. My sex drive is through the roof. I could easily have sex every single day. About two and a half years ago my DH was diagnosed with low testosterone. I would chase him and chase him and he would turn me down. It did a real number on my head. I internalized it. He didn't love me. He didn't find me desirable. It got to the point where even when we did have sex I felt like he was putting in hardly any effort and finally it got to the point where I could no longer orgasm. I felt like even when we did do it he was just doing me a favor.
I went to see a therapist. My therapist really put into perspective for me that he had a medical issue. That it wasn't me. I took him several times to the therapist with me and she conveyed to him how his lack of desire was making me feel. And you know what, we laid out some ground rules. I don't initiate anymore. He committed to once a week. I wasn't chasing him any more getting rejected. He learned that he has to put in some effort when we do it. And it improved our sex life. Is it a hard adjustment? Yes it is. Do I love him enough to have sex once a week and it be fulfilling? Yes I do. Because I would rather have once a week sex with him than be with someone else.
Seeing that therapist helped me rebuild my self esteem. Seeing that therapist helped me to understand that it was a medical issue on his part. Setting up ground rules helped us. And once we figured it out, it improved our relationship. He gives a little and I give a little.
Now he has taken a job which has him gone from Sunday night to Friday morning. And while we wish we could see each other every day, believe it or not it has actually improved our sex life. He can't wait to see me when he comes home and he wants to be with me when he does come home.
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Post by paperamy on Sept 6, 2017 1:57:32 GMT
I'm going to share something that I probably shouldn't. Thank you so much for sharing. I really appreciate it.
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Post by stacyscrapper on Sept 6, 2017 2:02:42 GMT
I registered for the boards just to respond to you and provide hope. I've recently started medication to correct a hormone issue and within weeks, I was a new person. My sex drive reappeared. I could orgasm again. I lost weight. I no longer felt half as prone to anger. My energy level increased tenfold. It took correcting the hormone issue to make me realize just how severely it had impacted my life. I'm 37 and too young for menopause. But weirdly, I had developed a teeny tiny tumor in my pituitary gland that was secreting prolactin. It was only diagnosed because I went to the Ob/Gyn hoping for hormone testing and while she was asking for symptoms, I mentioned as an aside that I was still lactating 6 years after I last stoped nursing. She added a prolactin test to the hormone testing panel. Good thing because the basic hormones were all normal. It wasn't estrogen or testosterone or any of the other hormones you generally hear about. Now I take one pill a week to normalize prolactin levels and keep them low. That's all it took to get rid of so many problems. I would bet $100 that hormones are at the root of your issues. Congratulations on being proactive and scheduling an appointment. Wishing you definitive answers and a new course of action. As women, we don't have to settle for feeling less than ideal.
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Post by mom on Sept 6, 2017 2:51:12 GMT
I agree with those who have suggested having a full hormonal workup. When my hormones were off I had no desire. Fix the hormones and it fixed the desire.
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