|
Post by genny on Nov 6, 2018 2:00:27 GMT
I’m so sorry. Prayers for peace, this is such a hard time.
|
|
Gravity
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,230
Jun 27, 2014 0:29:55 GMT
|
Post by Gravity on Nov 6, 2018 2:05:42 GMT
I am so sorry. Big ((hugs)).
|
|
|
Post by kikitwo on Nov 6, 2018 2:06:50 GMT
I've been there--it's not easy! My thoughts and prayers are with you.
|
|
used2scrap
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,036
Jan 29, 2016 3:02:55 GMT
|
Post by used2scrap on Nov 6, 2018 2:16:02 GMT
I’m sorry.
|
|
|
Post by scrappintoee on Nov 6, 2018 2:16:12 GMT
I’m so very sorry !!!! 😰 We went through that with our Mom and years later, my precious brother , so I understand how sad it is. I’m glad you posted and that you’ll feel a bit better by knowing lots of peAple are thinking of / or praying for her, you, and everyone else who loves her. (( hugs ))
|
|
Deleted
Posts: 0
Jun 1, 2024 19:49:12 GMT
|
Post by Deleted on Nov 6, 2018 2:17:04 GMT
[hug]
|
|
|
Post by Eddie-n-Harley on Nov 6, 2018 2:40:43 GMT
I am very sorry.
When my mother was in hospice, and I had to leave to go home knowing the next time I would be back would be to identify the body and finalize the funeral plans, I told her that I loved her, that I would look out for my younger sister, and that I would "see ya when I see ya" or whatever it is that rachael ray would say at the end of her shows. Not "goodbye."
She was on a lot of pain meds and I don't know how conscious she was during the last week, but she was awake enough to say she loved me, too, so I know she heard, even though I wasn't sure she would
|
|
|
Post by leannec on Nov 6, 2018 2:42:18 GMT
I'm so very sorry ... hugs to you!
|
|
|
Post by pmm on Nov 6, 2018 2:53:53 GMT
I’m so sorry.
|
|
|
Post by mikklynn on Nov 6, 2018 2:54:12 GMT
You posted here, because you know we care. We stand with you.
I'm so sorry. I'm sending my love and prayers to you and your family.
|
|
|
Post by tentoes on Nov 6, 2018 3:01:22 GMT
I'm so sorry. Sending prayers your way.
|
|
|
Post by MichyM on Nov 6, 2018 3:05:12 GMT
I'm so very sorry. I've been there, and it is heartbreaking. Please remember to be kind to yourself...now...and in the coming months. Sending lots of good thoughts to you.
|
|
|
Post by mrssmith on Nov 6, 2018 3:09:00 GMT
So sorry to hear your news. Hugs!
|
|
MaryMary
Pearl Clutcher
Lazy
Posts: 2,975
Jun 25, 2014 21:56:13 GMT
|
Post by MaryMary on Nov 6, 2018 3:09:59 GMT
I’m so sorry. Losing my mom was so much harder than I had ever expected.
|
|
eastcoastpea
Prolific Pea
Posts: 9,252
Jun 27, 2014 13:05:28 GMT
|
Post by eastcoastpea on Nov 6, 2018 3:10:46 GMT
I'm so sorry you are going through this....if there is anything you want to say to your mother do it now, even if she doesn't know who you are or what you are saying do it for you, also sit and hold her hand if she will let you.....hugs! Totally this. Hugs to you.
|
|
ModChick
Drama Llama
True North Strong and Free
Posts: 5,062
Jun 26, 2014 23:57:06 GMT
|
Post by ModChick on Nov 6, 2018 3:37:48 GMT
My mom is dying. According to hospital staff she only has days left. She doesn't seem to recognize us any more. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to say. Not even sure why I posted this thread. If any of you have words of advice please tell me what to do. Just be with her. Sit and talk to her. That's what my cousins did when their mom was dying. I am so sorry, First I am so very sorryto read this. I’ll say prayers for you both. As above poster said yes just sit and talk. That’s what I did for my parents when they were dying. You never know how much is getting through and just the comfort of someone there should help her. Maybe she does recognize you and just can’t communicate it. Also tell her it’s ok to go. My mom held on for 4 days after we turned off life support and I’m really glad someone mentioned to me to tell her she can move on, she can let go. I so feel for you, I’ve been in your shoes and it’s never easy. Don’t forget you don’t have to be strong all the time either. Take care of yourself. Hugs and prayers.
|
|
|
Post by chaosisapony on Nov 6, 2018 3:39:11 GMT
I'm so, so sorry.
|
|
Jili
Pearl Clutcher
SLPea
Posts: 4,363
Jun 26, 2014 1:26:48 GMT
|
Post by Jili on Nov 6, 2018 3:41:49 GMT
I'm really sorry. I've not had this personal experience yet, but I know I will someday and even the thought is just heartbreaking. I wish you strength and peace in the days ahead.
|
|
|
Post by scrapmaven on Nov 6, 2018 3:43:43 GMT
When my mom was dying my world was consumed w/stress and grief. I never thought I could go on w/o my mother. To my surprise, I moved into a new normal. It didn't happen overnight. It's a lengthy process. Joy returned fully and completely. There is a fog that you will endure and you won't be happy for a while, but you will find happiness, again. You'll grow in ways you could never imagine and you'll miss your mother every day. It's a horrible loss, but life goes on and so will you. I'm so very sorry that you have to take this terrible journey. It will get much better in time. It will.
|
|
|
Post by librarylady on Nov 6, 2018 3:44:11 GMT
A hug to you. This is a difficult time. Go, if possible, sit with your mother and say all the things you want to say. Hold her hand. Sing if you want to, but just be in her presence. If you are a person who prays, do that with her also.
|
|
|
Post by utmr on Nov 6, 2018 3:48:38 GMT
I'm sorry. Peace and comfort to you.
|
|
|
Post by ToniW on Nov 6, 2018 4:06:28 GMT
Thanksgiving will be one year since I lost my mom. The difficult thing for me was that she was not herself as she started going downhill. A lot of what she said was not her normal self. I told her I loved her and thanked her for loving me, even though I must have drove her crazy in my younger days. Whether she heard me or not, I don't know but I'm glad I told her. So, tell your mom what you need to say while you can.
I'll be saying a prayer. Sending hugs.
|
|
|
Post by calgaryscrapper on Nov 6, 2018 4:23:55 GMT
If we left a family member in a nursing home, hospital or hospice we never said good bye. We always said “see you soon”. I know my mil and Brother took comfort in this.
|
|
hutchfan
Drama Llama
Posts: 6,158
Jul 6, 2016 16:42:12 GMT
|
Post by hutchfan on Nov 6, 2018 4:51:06 GMT
Sending hugs.
|
|
|
Post by miominmio on Nov 6, 2018 6:27:20 GMT
((Hugs))
|
|
|
Post by lucyg on Nov 6, 2018 6:28:33 GMT
I am so very sorry. Spend what time you can with her. She may not know, but you will remember.
Sending hugs.
|
|
|
Post by ametallichick on Nov 6, 2018 6:58:41 GMT
I don’t have advice for you. Im sorry that you are going through this. (((Hugs)))
|
|
|
Post by crittsmom on Nov 6, 2018 7:03:52 GMT
I am just so very sorry.
|
|
|
Post by JoP on Nov 6, 2018 7:11:03 GMT
I’m so very sorry
|
|
zella
Pearl Clutcher
Posts: 3,884
Jul 7, 2014 19:36:30 GMT
|
Post by zella on Nov 6, 2018 8:51:05 GMT
I'm so very sorry.
Have someone stay with her at all times. Get a cot in her room. Talk to her. She may still hear you. Ask if there's in-hospital hospice care. Look for signs that she's in pain (grimacing, pulling away from touch, moaning), and insist on good pain control for her. Hospice will enable her to have morphine drops, which are such a blessing at the end. Atropine can also be helpful to dry up secretions (which seems to contradict the next paragraph, but doesn't).
Let anyone know who needs to say goodbye to come and do so. Touch her gently, stroke her hand or brush her hair. Keep her clean. Ask for mouth swabs. Dying people often start to breathe exclusively through their mouths, and they get very dry. The swabs can be dipped in water then used to keep her lips and mouth moist. If she develops a fever and seems in distress, ask for a tylenol suppository. But a very high fever sometimes comes right before death.
I'm really sorry you're going through this. But think of this: your mom may need permission from her closest loved ones to let go. When she's gone, her pain is over. You are then taking on her pain. It is the ultimate act of love.
|
|