What are your expectations for Mother's Day?

We don't do much for Mother's Day and Father's Day. We may get takeout but we just use the holiday as an excuse to eat out.

My son has an out of town soccer game smack in the middle of the day. I expect him to score a goal and win. Haha, really I’m just so glad sports are back I’m fine just doing my soccer mom thing. But a goal would be nice-no pressure.

I just want to sleep in.

Probably social media has skewed expectations a bit since people only post their highlights. Like would I have posted about the Mothers Day when my husband gave me a token card from my kid when he dropped her in the bed bright and early with a stinky diaper? And then took off to spend the day with his mom? And then I went grocery shopping with my two year old who had a tantrum on the floor of the entrance? And then she kicked me the entire time? No, I would have posted and gushed about the card and people would fill in the blanks that the rest of my day was amazing.

I also find that a lot of husbands these days are pretty horrible acknowledging the day or choosing their mom over their wives. Like my husband in the beginning wouldn't do anything because I wasn't HIS mom. Mothers Day was about HIS mom (and she wasn't giving up the day now that I was also a mom). Since our child was a baby obviously she wasn't doing anything so it was hard to be barely acknowledged while watching him go all out for MIL. Within a few years he eventually flip flopped to the day being about me (he spends the Saturday before with his mom) and toned down celebrating his mom but he was a straight up bonehead the first two years.

Even though I wanted so little, it still hurt very, very much at the child rearing stage when kids suck the life out of you. So even if their expectations seem a little whacked to you, a little compassion for the new moms wouldn't be horrible. 

No kidding. We usually go to my mom's but we often go there most weekends for supper. We are not a gift giving family, our gift is being together. I see these over the top, people who are complaining about money but then get a necklace for Mother's Day from their 2 year old that was soooo sweet. Setting the bar too high.

DH and I always give each other the day off for Mother's Day and Father's Day. Our kids are grown now, so kid-wrangling isn't an issue anymore, but no cooking or planning or pick-up.

This year, all I really want is to float in my pool and watch movies. DH just got a surprise bonus, so we used part of it to buy a projector and screen for outdoors. He was concerned about getting me a gift, but I don't need anything and the outdoor setup is enough. The kids usually aren't great with planning or gifting, but DD just got a Cricut and I know she's been working on the punny plant labels I requested.

We've also got DD's 2020 graduation ceremony tomorrow (finally!), so we'll be traveling and meeting FIL for dinner tonight and lunch after the ceremony tomorrow. It will be nice to have a relaxing day after our celebratory day, although DD is spending Saturday night in college town and I did offer to stay with her in case she wants to party and needs a driver (she really doesn't drink, but it is a much-delayed college graduation.) She said "but Sunday is Mother's Day," but I assured her that Mother's Day is every year and college graduation is once in a lifetime and she should have fun if she wants to.

No cooking

A greeting, a card, some love, maybe offering to go out for lunch or dinner. I’d love a day of no arguing and just happy in the house.

The only expectation I have is some sort of acknowledgment- like happy Mother’s Day.

Dd1 has already set plans with me for lunch and dd3 has said sorry she will miss being here since she’s on vacation out of state and we will do something together when she returns. Even if we didn’t end up doing anything I’d be happy with this acknowledgment- the girls and I do things together all the time and I know they love and appreciate me.

I’ve set up plans with my own mom for lunch for a later date after I move since my new home with my very close to her (15 minutes).

I think it’s fantastic that there’s a Mother’s Day and a Father’s Day. Parenting is one of the hardest and most thankless jobs and it’s nice to have special days that honor parents.

I don’t have expectations from others, but I have expectations from myself. I call or text every mother and father I know on those days. For my mother, my son and I will spend all day Sunday with her and bringing her favorite foods so we can all have a nice meal together. She was the one who taught me how to play Scrabble as a kid and to this day we still enjoy it, so we’ll likely do that. Even in her 90s her mind is still very sharp and still manages to beat me at it. Her caregiver who is also a mother will be joining us for the day. If the temp is warm enough we’ll take a walk around her neighborhood and park. Pre-COVID, we would have brunch out and see a film afterwards. One of the things the pandemic has forced on her is the isolation. While I visit her regularly and she has an aide, she misses her church, her friends, going to the cinema, that sort of thing. She and I both have been widowed a long time so I can understand the loneliness.

For myself, I already get tons of greetings from friends and family and my son always gives a gift card and a letter. For me, personally, it’s not the expectation of presents that highlights the day (the creator of Mother’s Day herself hated the commercialization of it and I think that’s what made it meaningless and perfunctory for some). It’s the acknowledgement that mothers are special enough to warrant a day when they’re honored and thanked for what they do.

Well said!  I add my hugs to sunnycamom's.

Merilee

My DH and kids always do something for me. In the past it’s been brunch and then planting my flower beds and gifts. I think this year it will be just DH and I so we will do gifts + brunch and then I will go play on my scrapbook room.

For all my DH faults, he has always made sure my holidays were special and has encouraged my boys to do the same.

It will be a normal Sunday- My boys have all moved away and the one that is local enough to visit is working a double. One kid moved last weekend so he brought me a sweet card before he went. They'll all call and chat for a few and remind me that they are my favorite kid and I'll agree.

DH will make breakfast and we'll probably hunker down with the pups to watch a movie and play some board games since it's supposed to be rainy. I'll be extra obnoxious and ask him to refill my coffee and other random things 'because, I mean, it IS Mothers Day and I should be adored", he will tell me I'm an asshole and the best baby mama he's ever had and bring me coffee, like he does every Sunday.

Monday I'll meet up with my aunt for the mother/daughter banquet at church.

Well, what a huge surprise!  My son just texted to invite me to Mother’s Day lunch, except on Saturday instead because the crowds would be too much on Sunday with most places allowing 1/2 occupancy.  I asked him how he remembered and he responded, “lol, my fiancé told me”. I don’t care, I am just excited to see him.  He is moving to Idaho before the end of the month so this may be the last lunch I get for a very long time.