Do you get gifts for Mother's Day?

I got a text from my sons. We don't give each other gifts but we do help each other out when one needs it through the year.

Since I'm not a parent, I can't speak for me. However, I bought my mother a gift. My dad would take her out to dinner but he did not buy her a gift. After he passed, I made her a Mother's day lunch each year. Dad did birthday, anniversary and Christmas gifts. As far as I know she never had any complaints about the arrangement and she did not buy him a father's day gift, that was my job.

smasonnc how old is your son? I think it’s the parent’s job to teach the kids how to show appreciation when they’re young and can’t do something independently. DH would get a card and flowers or something with DD when she was younger, and now that she’s a little older and more independent, he reminded her that she should “do something for your mom for Mother’s Day” LOL.

My DH usually gets flowering plants for the house and calls it a Mother’s Day gift and I’m okay with that. We went out today and bought six hanging baskets of my choosing for the front of the house, two different flowering plants for the patio pots on the deck and two more flowering climbers for the planters at the lake cabin. (~$170, so not chump change.) We’ll get more plants at the lake for the two new planters we forgot about when we were out shopping today.

DD usually makes me a card, this year she didn’t but she spent a considerable amount of class time at school digitizing my business logo   and then kept getting interrupted too many times to get it stitched out into a patch the way she wanted to. (That one computer is shared with several classroom machines that other kids also have to use.) The cool thing is once she’s done I’ll be able to sew it out myself on the machine we have at home. She also cooked dinner so I’m calling that a win.

I received a card with a gift card from my parents, a card from my husband, homemade cards from my kids, and gifts from my kids. I took my mother to a mother-daughter brunch + flower bar as her gift as well as gave her, my aunt, and my sister cards today. The rest of my gift was spending the afternoon with my kids & husband at a local arboretum and that I didn't have to cook all day.

My husband is really good about getting me a card, chocolates, maybe a gift card to somewhere, and maybe something bigger that doubles as an anniversary gift (because it's within a week of Mother's Day). My complaint is that he does not involve or seem to encourage our boys to do anything--they are 19 & 16. I know it sounds like a weird and petty thing to complain about but this year it really seemed to irk me.

No I don't get gifts. I don't want my young adult DDs spending what little money they have on me. DH and I never exchange gifts. Birthdays, Christmas, anniversary, Mother or Father's Day.

I have always gotten something from DH and the girls. The gifts are nice, but for me, I just like to be appreciated on that day and it doesn't have to be something big. It used to be that I had high expectations and I would get so disappointed when there wasn't appreciation or it felt like something that had to be done for me. I think MY (not saying this is the case for you) expectations were too high. I typically get appreciated on a daily basis. I don't need a special day for it. I reset my expectations and the day is always so much better for me now. 

I've been married for over 30 years to my husband.  He's not a gift giver.  I used to get so worked up over it.  I have accepted it at this point.  Not worth getting worked up about it.  He is who he is.  Sometimes he does good and sometimes it's a fail.  More fail than good.  I have learned that it isn't worth getting mad over.  Trust me.. I LOVE gifts.. love love gifts.. but as I have gotten older, I don't always need 'stuff'.  So when it happens great.  When it doesn't, it's no biggie.

This mother's day... (and birthdays and anniversary) was a trip to NYC.  It really WASN'T for those reasons, he threw in those 'holidays' and said that the trip counted towards that.  I just roll my eyes. lol

On Mother's Day.. my son got me flowers, a balloon and chocolate.  That is pretty good for him.  My youngest is broke.. lol.. my middle and her husband treated me all day to a little side trip to the mountains, lunch, dessert and Starbucks.  It was a great day.

My son rarely even remembers my birthday or Mother’s Day so when he does and I get a phone call, it is a big deal for me.  A gift would probably cause me to have a stroke.  Even receiving a card would shock me. He just has never been one to do things like that.  Well, he did as a little boy, but nothing since puberty.

We were talking on the phone (last November!) and he said he was getting another call and would call me back since we had only been talking for 2 or 3 minutes.  I admit it, I got my feelings hurt because he frequently rushes off the phone when I call, says he will call me back, and then forgets.  I decided to just wait to see how long it would take for him to call me back.  He didn’t.  

So I stopped my usual texting just to check in and didn’t call him either.  He actually remembered that it was Mother’s Day and called me yesterday.  He didn’t say anything about how long it had been since we talked and I didn’t want to mention it either.  He did say he was thinking of trying to clear a few days in his schedule before the year ends to fly out and see my new house and help me with a few things around here.  That surprised me.  

I really don’t want to be a pushy mother, but I would at least like to stay in touch with him to see how they are doing.  When we both lived in California, he would take me to lunch about once a month and I lived for those lunches.  I would just sit and listen to all he had going on and it felt fantastic to be included.  Then they moved to Idaho and I moved to Oregon, then they returned to California right after I moved here. They hated Idaho.

 I admit, moving out of where we were in California has been strange for me too, because we had so many stores, medical facilities, and fun places to go that were so close and convenient.  They moved back and he said they go for walks on the beach at least three times a week now.  Their apartment has a sliver of a view of the ocean from the window.  He said they are so much happier in California again.  But now I don’t get lunches let alone a phone call.

Last year, I asked how he felt about scheduling a day/time to visit on the phone, maybe twice a month.  He said sure, he would love to.  It only lasted for two calls.  I just have to accept it.  What is that saying?  Something about having a girl is having a daughter for life and having a son lasts until he takes a wife.  Something like that.  At least we do talk.  He has cut his father out completely.  But they had a very rocky relationship.  He and I always got along great.  I never saw this coming.

Mother vent over.

Sometimes. I have had maybe five of the years I have been a mom that had good quality gifts. Usually, I get a card. We also usually go out for a nice brunch (that I plan), but this year that didn't happen since my mom hurt herself and we had to help her yesterday.

This year I got a "basic" card from my kids (DH). They are 16. Dh is not a good role model for gift-giving. I have tried to model for others. I do think they might do OK when they are on their own. Neither have real jobs or their DL yet, so maybe next year? My mom always gives me $100 or buys me something around that range that I want. She always gives a nice card.

I buy my mom a gift(s) and a nice card every year.

Dh sent his mom a card. In the past I have sent her flowers or a gift, but I no longer take care of any of that for her. He is in charge of his family.

My husband gets me a card and either makes dinner for me, or gets whatever takeout I want.  No 'gifts' and I do not expect or want any.

My dh doesn't usually get me a gift. He doesn't get me cards any more. He does take all of us out for brunch. This year he did get me a gift. We were in Arizona and I wanted some Native American jewelry. I was just going to get some earrings. I ended up getting a necklace, earrings, a ring, and a bracelet. Dh bought it for me and said it was my Mother's Day gifts.

My adult children always get me flowers and something for my garden.

My dh's birthday is June 11 so he gets a birthday gift from me and gifts from his kids for Father's Day. Sometimes I combine gifts. 

My hubby and I worked at the same garden center 48 years ago! I was a teenager. We always worked the holidays. We got to see first hand, the pressure people are under with choosing a gift for their mothers. " my mother only likes a specific shade of pink and you don't have it"...Etc. It was all about the GIFT, not the message. Fast forward, we have 4 adult kids, (30's and 40's). We told them early on that we don't celebrate Hallmark holidays, which tell you when to celebrate your mother, father or lover.
They each have their own way of letting us know they love and appreciate us. We don't need a 'gift'. Their words mean so much more to us.