Is this bad of me? Our ballots came in the mail...UPDATE

Why do you think it's okay to withhold his mail, especially his ballot?

I'm sorry but I don't agree and find this childish.

We are all free to vote for who we think is best or who we agree with. Withholding his ballot so he can't vote right now is taking away his right as a US citizen and if my husband did that to me I would be beyond pea-livid.

I say he is an adult. He is responsible to ensure he votes. You didn't throw it in the garbage or hide it from him.

She didn't withhold it, if I'm reading right. She just... Failed to tell him it's sitting there in plain view. Her hands are tied if he doesn't, um, remember to look for it. Lol!

DH is not voting for Trump and he refuses to vote for a Democrat. In the primaries, I did not hand him his ballot and a pen and remind him to vote, and then stick his ballot in the mailbox at the last minute for him like I usually do... My 19-year-old managed to do all these things without me saying anything, so why can't DH? It's been months, it's probably still sitting on his desk...

For once, our ballots did not cancel each other out

Our ballots for this election are not here yet, otherwise mine would already be in the mailbox on the way to be counted.  

I think you should let him know and overnight to him if he actually cares, which, he likely doesn’t.

It’s a piece of mail that he has to “act” on. Letting him know would be the right thing to do. That said… I also bring in the mail and sort etc. my guy spends a lot of time at our second home. When I see “unique” things come through, I ask him if he wants me to open it or what not so he has the opportunity to act on it. I totally get how you ended up in this situation though… lol stuff happens.

Also add… my son has actually never voted. Barely old enough and didn’t care in 2020. And has voiced that he plans to vote this year. I 1000% guarantee that if I don’t remind him, then remind him where and the hours, he won’t. He’s also just as likely to choose to finish watching a movie than go if I don’t give him hours of notice. Not my job.

Also, he works with a bunch of 35-65 year old tradesmen. IF he votes he’ll likely be a Trump vote. Soooooo will I remind him? Yes. It’s the right thing to do (in my opinion.) He was raised by a Republican woman. I just think this election (President) needs to go Blue, but I don’t expect a (my) 23 year old who works his ass off every day and sees his tax money being spent like lottery winnings by rich people to spend the time and mental capital to really weigh this election. Plus, I think participation in the election system is a good thing- even for people I disagree with. Feeling bad about your vote is pretty damn heavy, and I think a learning experience. Btw- so no one throws a clot, we are in MA. His vote wouldn’t matter, except to him. And I always vote for him.

Now my mom on the other hand who has been on the Trump Train for better or worse and non stop nonsense… she’s a PA voter. Refuses mail in or to vote early… if she didn’t make it to the polls due to something making it tough (car breakdown, over slept, forgot what day.. whatever… I totally wouldn’t remind her… This election has been her life for years and she is right. She gets her vote and it counts… but it wouldn’t make me sad if she doesn’t get to cast it. Maybe even learns the hard way that early voting and mail in voting is valid and in her best interests. She still doesn’t seem to understand that people that work for a living don’t get to schedule their November around polling hours.

Anyway… neither of these scenarios is yours.. but I think letting him know is the right thing to do. If it was my son and it was going to take a $25 FedEx charge to get his ballot- he wouldn’t bother.

Be a good human and allow your husband the democratic process.

I was coming to say this. In my home and marriage, being petty like this would not fly nor would it be celebrated - even if I didn't like who he was voting for. 

In my opinion if you left his mail where You typically leave his mail it is up to him to look. I live alone and it is up to me to check out my own mail, no difference in this situation. If you are concerned about voting, especially knowing you will be gone until after the election, and do not check for mail or at least ask about that is your issue IMO. 🤷🏻‍♀️

No, I'm not saying he should blame you at all. But just imagine if you didn't get a chance to vote in this very important election because he withheld information from you. 

Colorado sends a text and email that your ballot has been sent. If you don't have either communication, why is it up to someone else to get the ballot to them as you know it will come in the mail? What if it's a jury summons or some other kind of mail? Come on, he's an adult.