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Post by jeremysgirl on Mar 3, 2015 15:02:03 GMT
We are starting to look at houses and we are planning to buy one soon. Anyway, we are scheduled to look at two houses tonight and DH wanted to take the kids. He thinks because we all have to live there that they should be free to give their opinions. My position is that I don't want the kids involved in the home buying process because I feel that kids tend to fixate on certain things and don't look at the big picture. I could see taking the kids if we were maybe trying to decide between two houses or something and wanted their input. But I am thinking that 5 kids equals a lot of opinions and I think it is hard enough finding a house DH and I can agree on.
What was your experience?
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Belle
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Jun 28, 2014 4:39:12 GMT
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Post by Belle on Mar 3, 2015 15:04:58 GMT
I agree with you.....i would not take the kids at this stage of house hunting.
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zella
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Jul 7, 2014 19:36:30 GMT
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Post by zella on Mar 3, 2015 15:07:30 GMT
Absolutely not; no kids at this stage. I suspect they'd be a distraction if anything, and 5 kids is a lot to keep track of in someone else's house.
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Deleted
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May 7, 2024 21:05:46 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 3, 2015 15:07:55 GMT
I agree with you....
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~Susan~
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Jul 6, 2014 17:25:32 GMT
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Post by ~Susan~ on Mar 3, 2015 15:09:22 GMT
I agree with you. If you aren't paying for it, then you have no say.
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gloryjoy
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Jun 26, 2014 12:35:32 GMT
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Post by gloryjoy on Mar 3, 2015 15:10:40 GMT
I wouldn't take the kids. I agree once you narrow it down to one or two houses, maybe.
But really, I'm the one paying for it and although I do value my kids feelings and opinions, it's ultimately what I want. I think some kids would focus on things that weren't really important such as "I don't like the color of the room" or something similar.
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Deleted
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May 7, 2024 21:05:46 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 3, 2015 15:11:01 GMT
We would take daughter with us, and
" I LOVE THIS HOUSE ! This is my room ! "
At every house we went to.
Makes it hard to negotiate.
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Post by Scrappyhappy on Mar 3, 2015 15:11:24 GMT
No, I would not bring the kids.
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caro
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Refupea 1130
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Jun 26, 2014 14:10:36 GMT
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Post by caro on Mar 3, 2015 15:11:23 GMT
Absolutely not; no kids at this stage. I suspect they'd be a distraction if anything, and 5 kids is a lot to keep track of in someone else's house. THIS! It's hard enough to look and make decisions, why add to that stress?
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teddyw
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Jun 29, 2014 1:56:04 GMT
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Post by teddyw on Mar 3, 2015 15:12:43 GMT
Don't take the kids. They only fixate on their space. You"re right they cannot see the big picture typically. My DH can't see the big picture. You will live there a lot longer than them so it should be the house for you & your husband except you'll need certain # of beds & baths. I don't recall your kids being exceptionally young.
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eastcoastpea
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Jun 27, 2014 13:05:28 GMT
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Post by eastcoastpea on Mar 3, 2015 15:12:46 GMT
My kids weren't born yet when we were house hunting. I wouldn't bring them. If I was choosing between two houses, and liked them both equally, I would ask their opinions.
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georgiapea
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Jun 27, 2014 18:02:10 GMT
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Post by georgiapea on Mar 3, 2015 15:14:26 GMT
No, no kids. Not on the first visit to a house. If you like one of those you see tonight you might arrange for the kids to be taken through the house.
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Post by anonrefugee on Mar 3, 2015 15:14:41 GMT
Maybe for the final two choices, just to hear their comments. But they'd be told in advance, parents and finances make ultimate decision.
That's what my parents did for us when I was teen. If we moved now, that's what I'd tell our kids.
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Post by jeremysgirl on Mar 3, 2015 15:16:51 GMT
Our kids are 14, 13, 11, 9, and 5. I am not worried about misbehaving, the only one who I could see being fidgety is the 5 year old. I just don't want 5 opinions coming at me and them thinking they get a say in the decision.
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Post by lily on Mar 3, 2015 15:18:02 GMT
Nope no kids. They don't have a say since they are not paying for it!
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Deleted
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May 7, 2024 21:05:46 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 3, 2015 15:18:30 GMT
I polled DH an he said he would take the kids. I, however, would not. So it may be a man thing.
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Peamac
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Jun 26, 2014 0:09:18 GMT
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Post by Peamac on Mar 3, 2015 15:19:35 GMT
How old are the kids? I could see taking them to the one you and DH decide on or are seriously considering, but wouldn't take them this early in the game.
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lindas
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Jun 26, 2014 5:46:37 GMT
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Post by lindas on Mar 3, 2015 15:19:45 GMT
Ask yourself this, would you want 8 strangers walking through your house? I'm guessing the answer would be no so leave the kids home.
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Post by miominmio on Mar 3, 2015 15:22:36 GMT
I'm firmly on the "no kids"bench. What was it that lady on House Hunters said? "This is not a democracy"? As long as I'm the one paying thehouse, the decision would be mine, and mine alone (ok, DH would have a say, too, of course).
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freebird
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Jun 25, 2014 20:06:48 GMT
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Post by freebird on Mar 3, 2015 15:22:58 GMT
Ha! My children have zero say in what I'm going to spend $100k, (+/-) on. No way. I'd take them to show them what we'd picked out, but that's the end of it.
who wants a 5 year old girl to tell me they hate the house because it has pink ponies painted in the bedroom. Or a teenager that doesn't want a house because the driveway's not big enough for basketball.
WE pick what's big enough for our family, not a bunch of minors.
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Post by scrappychick on Mar 3, 2015 15:24:05 GMT
Five kids? Not a chance. You and DH need the peace and quiet to go through the home and talk to each other about it.
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Post by leannec on Mar 3, 2015 15:43:22 GMT
Dh is a realtor ... he says no kids ... buying a house is serious business and it's not necessarily a democratic decision You are the ones who need to make the choice
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blue tulip
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Jun 25, 2014 20:53:57 GMT
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Post by blue tulip on Mar 3, 2015 15:49:51 GMT
depends on their ages. we always brought our 6 and 9 yr old boys this summer, they liked looking at the houses. it was fun hearing their opinions. but we didn't let their opinions sway us, it was still our purchase and what we say goes. they knew to take their shoes off, be respectful of the owner's possessions if it was occupied.
by the end of the hunt they were sick of seeing houses, so they just stayed home while we went.
ETA just read you have 5 kids. that would be a no for me then.
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LeaP
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Jun 26, 2014 23:17:22 GMT
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Post by LeaP on Mar 3, 2015 16:09:22 GMT
No kids, I'm with you. We are living in a funky rental house here in Canada. When we first moved in my kids loved it and couldn't understand why our (the adults) enthusiasm was tempered. Flash forward six months and the kids understand. Experience count a lot when buying/looking at houses. Funky quirks that charm in the beginning grate at the end.
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NoWomanNoCry
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Jun 25, 2014 21:53:42 GMT
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Post by NoWomanNoCry on Mar 3, 2015 16:16:09 GMT
5 kids? No way! I can see them all fighting with each other because they aren't all agreeing on house stuff or rooms. Not something I would want to deal with in the middle of seeing homes.
Good luck!
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Post by winogirl on Mar 3, 2015 16:19:04 GMT
I don't have kids but I'd say no. If I was the seller, I sure wouldn't want to see any kids coming along to look at my house.
I watch a lot of Fixer Upper, Love It or List It etc. shows. They never bring their kids with them when looking at houses. For good reason, I'm sure.
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Deleted
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May 7, 2024 21:05:46 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Mar 3, 2015 16:20:04 GMT
Nope...They didn't see the house until we moved in (moving cross country). They did see the few pictures that were online and the ones DH took when he looked at houses without me.
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Post by littlemama on Mar 3, 2015 16:23:14 GMT
No way would I take the kids at this stage. Once you have it down to one or two, then I would show them and let them have input, but I would tell them that your decision is still final. They may see benefits or drawbacks that you didn't see, so I think their input is important eventually (assuming they are not 4 and 5 years old!)
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Post by bc2ca on Mar 3, 2015 16:35:57 GMT
Definitely not, especially with 5 kids and the likelihood that they are not going to agree on a favorite and then, if you do pick one, you have winners & losers amongst the kids.
DD did see a lot of the houses I looked at when we last bought and it was pretty cute to hear her comment on flooring or paint colors and say "but that is easy to change".
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Post by Darcy Collins on Mar 3, 2015 16:38:41 GMT
I'd have a discussion with them about what they're hoping the new house will have. You might be surprised by the answer, and it might give you some insight on things that will make life for your large family easier. You also might get unrealistic wants that will need to be tempered. I wouldn't take them on the house tours. That's just a lot of opinions, and I just don't think it would be productive.
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