If you are concerned about your sons being falsely accused .

If only that were true. Sadly, both genders have falsely accused others. Maybe it can be a good thing that almost everywhere we go, we are on video and that can SOMETIMES be a good thing. I fear for my nephews even though they are really good young men. I fear for my nieces even though they are really good young women.

The concern is grossly outsized. Full stop. 

I have 2 daughters in their early twenties. I'm not obsessed with their safety, but I would say it's a thought that's there more often than not. Every time they go out, I'll remind them to be aware of their surroundings, never put their drink down if at a party, etc., even though they are responsible. It's a scary world for women.

Agreed. I was telling DH about the post on here where I read about the difference between how men and women prepare for their day differently to avoid being sexually assaulted. I think once men realize that this is something we women are forced to think about almost daily compared to the fact that they almost never have to think about it at all is eye opening for them.

We’re lucky that we live in a relatively “safe” area, but when I lived in the city I didn’t want to go shopping after dark alone or even drive through certain areas. Heck, I was technically assaulted twice in my own high school (groped by some creep once right in the front office of the school!), so there really is NO safe place for a woman to be. #metoo I learned early to keep my head up and my wits about me and pay attention to my surroundings. It must be nice to be able to go through life without ever having to even think twice about who is walking past you on the street, or getting into in an elevator with you or who you might encounter in a grocery store parking lot.

I think the biggest factor for my own DH is the fact that we have a young daughter that we both hope never has to experience anything awful, but the odds are pretty good that at some point in her life she probably will and that’s pretty sad. Because of her, he thinks about these things now too and the unfairness of it all. I think if men had to personally experience even a tenth of the genuine worry and fear of potentially being assaulted or violated that women and girls experience over the course of our lifetimes, a LOT of things would quickly change.

My son and his friends do take care to avoid compromising positions. They get called woman haters or worse.

OMG this. I hadn't even thought of this in so long. I lived in Moscow Russia for a year about 20 years ago, and I had to teach myself VERY QUICKLY how to deal with creeps in the metro and on the street. At that time, it was always a given that Russian men would say things, follow you, all kinds of crap. I was in the metro saying goodbye to a friend, and an older man in a military uniform saw my Russian (male) friend leave and then try to convince me to go with him "out for fun." WTH.  I learned the phrases to say, what to do, etc. You'll see women at night group themselves together in the metro cars, on the platform, walking to/from bus stops. I was groped a few times just while walking down the street. Assholes. But for a lot of the time, frankly, it's so cold and you're so bundled up it's a blessing in disguise. But still.

Yup. And it’s to important to understand what’s imbedded in your math - that false claims are reported and so many real incidents are unreported - and might contribute to a different incidence perception in people’s minds (although still relatively small). 

This whole thing makes me so sad. I am absolutely not concerned for my son and I am absolutely more concerned for my daughters.

They stopped inviting women to any of their “game” nights( including paintball/and the B.B. thing). They will only meet women at a pub/restaurant in a group. Nobody goes home as a couple.

On the funny/smilie side. One of his friends just got engaged. The food east of the group is puzzled on how he did that! ( just kidding, but she did say it was like dating 7 guys). And it’s nice to know that the friends like her and think she is perfect for their friend.
M

What? I’m sorry I’m not understanding how this fits into the mommy wars debate? Mommy wars generally refers to women fighting about breastfeeding or bottle feeding, csections vs vag births, tv vs no tv, etc.

I don’t get how rape allegations factor in? I am sick today so maybe it’s obvious and my head is just too fuzzy to grasp what’s happening here?

Excluding women from group events in public settings doesn’t strike me as reasonable precautions. The rest does.

My son just moved into a coed university residence last month. There is a lot of drinking on weekends and he has seen a couple of situations where he was uncomfortable enough with the level of intoxication and, therefore, ability to consent, to feel the need to intervene. Rather than helping them himself, he does this by either talking to the female residence advisor or the girl’s roommate so they can make sure to get the girl to safely to bed. A reasonable precaution for which nobody has yet to call him a woman hater.

Ok. I disagree, but thank you for clarifying.